by Taylor Hart
“No.” He shook his head. “It was the best night of my life.” He paused. “It just left me wanting you. All of you. Then, when I saw you kissing Jason, I doubted everything.”
“Doubted what?”
“This. I mean, that. Us. Everything.”
Another round of tears welled in her eyes, and she pulled away. “It was my fault.”
He put a hand on her knee. “Lil, I never regretted it.”
“Yes, you did.”
“No, I regretted leaving.”
They sat there, saying nothing. Not having to.
Standing, she threw her hands into the air and sniffed. “Well, now you’ve done it, Montana.”
“What?”
“My face is a disaster. My dress is ruined, and I’m still hungry.”
Montana wanted to talk about so much more, but all he could do was smile back at her. “I can fix that.”
* * *
Fifteen minutes later, they were both changed into T-shirts and shorts. They’d bought a bag of junk food and some water from the little store in the hotel and taken their towels out toward the beach.
The wind was on his face, and the faint scent of lemon circled into him. Lil was by his side, and Montana felt better than he’d felt since he was eighteen. His heart was light. She turned and laughed, her teeth flashing in the moonlight, matching the glint of her hair. She was breathtaking. He’d been married to a supermodel, but if he was truthful with himself, Lil was the prettiest girl he’d ever known.
They settled onto the beach and ceremoniously clinked water bottles. Lil held hers up in the air and looked out at the ocean. “I wish Jason was here.”
“Me too.” The center of Montana’s chest filled with warmth.
They both gulped back the water and shared a bag of Doritos, a bag of cheddar popcorn, and a tub of chocolate ice cream.
Lil laughed. “I’m going to be sick tomorrow.”
Montana agreed, lying back on the towel. “We have one more day. I want to show you around.”
“I have to work,” she protested.
Montana turned to her. “Do what you gotta do. Then I’ll show you around.”
She lay back, too. “I won’t refuse a guided tour of Oahu.”
They listened to the ocean and stared at the stars.
“What are you thinking?” Montana asked.
“I’m thinking this is perfect, being here … remembering our friend. Together.”
“It is.” He reached for her hand.
She tugged it back. “Let’s not.”
“Because of Brad?”
She hesitated. “It’s been a long day. Let’s just enjoy it, okay?”
“Fine.” But it was an outright lie.
“Good.”
“Good,” he agreed.
She laughed and turned to him, staring into his eyes. “Montana?”
“What?”
“When we’re together, are you always going to look at me the way you did when we were young?”
He knew she didn’t want to hear it, so he just gave her a dopey face and stuck out his tongue. “Is that better?”
She laughed and swatted at him. “Much.”
He laughed too. He reached for her hand, finding it in the sand. He put his hand on top of hers. “Friends,” he challenged.
Her eyes flashed down to their hands for a moment. Then she turned to the sky. “Fine. Friends.”
“Lil.”
“Yeah.”
“You’re going to finish the list with me, right?”
She sighed. “Yeah.” She stood. “Only if you help me collect shells for Jason’s mom.”
Montana grinned and stood. “You got it.”
He searched for shells and felt extremely grateful. He’d been living his life. Everything was fine. But until Lil had shown up at his concert, it was like he’d been hearing only part of the music. Now, with Lil back, all the parts of the accompaniment were working together.
22
When Lily finally got back to her room, she was exhausted. Falling onto the bed, she heard her phone buzz.
Picking it up, she saw it was just after midnight.
There were eight texts from Brad and five missed calls.
Resolved to face the music, she pressed Brad’s number.
“Lily.” He answered on the first ring.
“Hey.”
“Hey.” His voice was hard. “Are you having a good time?”
Sitting up, she ran a hand over her face. She wasn’t in the mood for games. “I don’t know. Should I be? Is that in Montana’s contract with the firm to retain my services—I have to have a good time?” She wanted to remind him he was the reason she was in Hawaii.
“Sorry,” he acquiesced. “How are you?”
“Fine.” She didn’t speak for a few seconds. She was not fine. There were emotions roiling inside of her she hadn’t felt for a long time.
“Lily?”
She cleared her throat. “Is everything ready for Jared’s case?”
“Yes, it’s on the docket for Thursday at one. You’ll be back for it?”
“The maid, is she testifying?”
Brad sighed. “I went to see her today, put some pressure on her. I couldn’t get a straight answer.”
This was the part of the law Lily didn’t like—the part she couldn’t control. The part where she couldn’t guarantee justice. “Okay.”
An awkward pause passed between them. “Lily, talk to me,” he urged.
Knowing it wasn’t actually Brad’s fault she was here—Montana had given her the choice—she offered the truth. “We surfed for Jason today.”
“What?”
“The summer before our senior year, we made a list we wanted to do. Surfing in Hawaii was on the list.”
He was quiet.
“Brad?”
“I wish I was there with you.”
She could picture him sitting at his home office desk with his computer open and a stack of files next to him. Montana had been right. Part of the reason she liked Brad was because he fought the good fight for these people. He truly cared about the right thing happening for the women and children in abusive relationships. But she couldn’t say she wished he were here. “It’s beautiful.”
He sighed. “I miss you.”
It was easy to grant him the next words. “I miss you too.” She did. Even though she hadn’t really thought of him. Hadn’t had a chance to think of him. Abruptly, guilt assailed her, and she had to tell him. “We kissed.”
“What?” His voice was angry.
“Last night. We had a moment remembering the past. That’s all it was.” There was nothing more. There couldn’t be.
She could hear him sucking in large, deep breaths. “Lily, if there’s something you need to tell me, just tell me.”
“There’s nothing else to tell you.” Her voice was firm. “So I’ll see you in court on Thursday?”
“Yeah.” His voice was sad. “Can I take you to dinner after?” Brad was a fighter.
“Okay,” she agreed.
“When will you go back to him?”
She realized they hadn’t even talked about the final plans to finish the list. “I’m not sure.”
“Okay.”
“Night, Brad.”
“Night.”
The next morning, Lily woke early and kept her eyes closed, listening to the ocean. She thought of Montana’s warm hand on hers last night.
It was ridiculous, being in Hawaii with Montana. But it felt so natural. So real. Like her life had been on pause, and someone had finally hit the play button.
She heard his knock on the door. Flinging back the covers, she grabbed the hotel robe and slipped it on. She left the safety latch in place and cracked the door.
Montana laughed, and she laughed too.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
“I’m getting your sorry butt out of bed to go sightseeing. No working. I’m paying your firm for you to be here.”
/> She had actually stayed up late finishing her work.
She scrunched up her face. “Great, let’s go.”
Pausing, he didn’t seem to trust her. “Really?”
“For someone that bosses people around and always gets what he wants, you sure look surprised to get your way.”
He mimicked her silly scrunched-up face. “It’s about time you gave me what I want.”
She felt the underlying tension.
He winked at her. “Bring your swimsuit. We might snorkel more too.” He turned and pointed at her. “And I’m buying you stuff, so don’t complain about it.”
Thirty minutes later, they were flying down the highway by the ocean in a red convertible mustang. The humid, salty air blew on her face. She felt free and alive and unlike the person she’d been the past couple of years.
Montana turned and grinned at her.
“What?”
“You’re beautiful,” he yelled over the wind.
Butterflies erupted inside of her. “Stop saying that!”
“It’s true!” He took her hand. “I’m only holding your hand as friends.” He wiggled his eyebrows mischievously.
For a brief moment, she thought of Brad. Then she pushed the thought away. There would be no denying Montana his hand-holding, and she knew it.
They went to a place called Sandy’s Beach. The waves were too high when they both got out, so they came right back to the car and moved on. They went to Hanauma Bay next and snorkeled away the rest of the morning. He insisted he take her to downtown Waikiki to the best snow cone place she’d ever been.
They went to a big outdoor market, where he bought her anything she even glanced at. By the end, it was a game. They walked out with three bags of stuff, including three Hawaiian dresses.
After getting showered and changed at the hotel, they attended a Hawaiian luau on the beach by their hotel. It culminated in a fire-dancing show and Montana insisting she go out and dance with the others.
Of course, they pulled Montana out too, and they both danced away the rest of the night with the whole group.
When he took her up to the room, she moved to put the key in the slot, but he made a vice-like cage around her and turned her around to him.
She giggled. “Stop.”
He stayed there, his scent mixing up her senses and the feel of his breath on her face completely taking her off guard.
“Montana.”
“I really want to kiss you. I’ve wanted to all day.”
“I have a boyfriend,” she countered.
He made a silly face.
She giggled and felt young and silly herself.
Gently, he reached up and brushed a piece of hair out of her face. “It was a good day, Lil.”
Suddenly, her heart felt stuck in her throat. No. No. No. She could feel herself melting right there in the hallway. “It was a good day.”
He traced her cheek down to her jaw.
Fire burned the trail where he touched. “I can’t, Montana.”
“When are we going to finish the list?”
They were close. His lips were only centimeters away. All thoughts were muddled except the ones dealing with her lips touching his. “Ahh, I don’t know.”
“You only have to be in Billings one day, right?”
“Right.”
“Meet me in Vegas Friday night. Come to the show, and meet the guys in the band.” He cleared his throat. “I’ll book you a room next to mine. Sunday morning, we’ll do the hot air balloon ride.”
He hadn’t moved, and blood whooshed through her head. Kiss him! Kiss him! Kiss him! her inner voice screamed at her.
Their chemistry was irresistible, and she realized she didn’t think it would be possible to stop whatever was happening if he pressed again. “Okay.” Her voice faltered.
“Lil?” he asked softly.
“Yeah?”
“Can I kiss you?”
“No,” she answered quickly, but didn’t move.
“Because of Brad?”
She giggled. “You sound jealous, Montana.”
He kept his eyes trained on her lips. “I’ve always been jealous. The last eight years I thought I was over you. And honestly, when I was married, I loved her. I did. But dreams of you have wrecked me. At every show, I see you. In the crowd, swaying to my love ballads. We have a second chance, Lil.”
She looked up at his eyes, and tears were budding.
“I wanted to give you more than anything money could buy. I wanted to give you me. All of me. And I wanted you. I still do.”
She was gone. Just like the other night at the water tower, their lips met and moved in perfect harmony. His hand moved down her hair and then down her back, pulling her closer. She melted into him.
Unable to stop herself, she ran her hands up his chest and face, loving his five o’clock shadow. Loving the way he tasted like the drink they’d had at the luau.
“Lil.” He sighed between kisses. “Lil.”
Every part of her wanted him closer. “I can’t, Montana.” She pulled back.
He leaned in and pulled her closer, kissing her longer. Drinking from her like a man finding water in a desert.
A light laugh escaped her. It was true. This thing with Montana was bigger than any feelings she’d ever had for any other man. But thoughts of what she’d done flashed into her mind.
She pulled back. “Montana …”
He bent, nibbling more at her neck. “C’mon, Lil. We’re perfect for each other. We’ll do it right this time. We’ll wait until we’re married.” He pulled back, squarely looking her in the eye. “Jason gave us a second chance. Let’s take it.”
The idea circled inside of her, thrilled her. But Montana didn’t know. He could never know.
He brushed a hand down her hair, starting little fires with his touch. “What do you say, Lil?”
Unwanted tears surfaced, and she felt the truth rising inside of her, bubbling and wanting to come out. But she couldn’t tell him. Silently, she cursed Jason. Why had he done this to her?
“Lil.” Montana leaned in and gently kissed the side of her lips.
“Almost everything.”
“What are you talking about?”
Abruptly, Lily pushed back, keeping her hands on Montana’s chest in order to ensure the distance between them. “I’ll finish the list with you, but I can’t do this.” Turning for the door, she pushed her key card inside and then pushed into her room. “I’ll talk to you in the morning.”
23
Montana woke the next morning to his phone alarm. Flipping back the covers, he hopped out of bed. It was something that he’d gotten into the habit of doing, hopping out of bed. It never did any good to sit around and moan in the morning. It’d been something he’d done even as a foster kid growing up.
Getting his running shoes, he slipped them on and grabbed his phone and headphones. In five minutes he was out the hotel doors and on the beach, starting into a sprint. This was also part of his life. He liked to do things that kept him healthy. Right now, all he could do was think about how to get Lily Ray Gold back again.
She was his match. They fit together like a puzzle. She knew it too. He could feel she knew it. Why was she denying both of them?
It was as real as anything he’d ever experienced. They were amazing together. He just had to figure out a way to convince her.
Finally, he’d found purpose in his life again. A real purpose. Music gave his life purpose, but Lil gave his life everything.
Lily could have her law practice. They’d set her up in Jackson. Or heck, he’d move to Billings so she could be close to her mother.
Another thought went through his mind. They could even build a house in Springs Hollow. At least have a home there for part of the time. They could go to the high school games. He could see Cindy and Frank. He could donate to the football team. He grinned, loving this feeling of purpose.
Then he stopped short.
Seeing her.
&n
bsp; The outline of her.
In her black spandex. Holding a yoga position on the rock next to the beach.
She looked like a picture. Like a song.
The music rushed into him.
He stopped, plunking down on the beach all out of breath. He pulled up the notes app on his phone and began putting down lines of music. The chorus sounded through him.
Been waiting for you all my life
But the winds of fortune didn’t go our way
Now they’re in sync with the wings of our life
We just have to fly. We just have to fly.
Goosebumps rushed over him.
Lily turned and looked at him.
Another round of chills.
She broke her pose and laughed.
He stood, laughing too.
Then he realized that’s what he loved about her. Their laughter. Just seeing each other.
The way she was. It was like they were sixteen again. Like nothing had changed.
He rushed to her. She looked confused and started toward him.
“What?” She giggled.
Before she could argue, he picked her up and swung her around.
She giggled. “You’re crazy.”
He didn’t let her go. “I don’t know what’s keeping us apart, but you’re back in my heart, Lily Ray Gold, and I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you. I know you have a boyfriend.” He laughed. “Tell him I’m sorry about this.” Gently he put her down and then went down on one knee. “Lily Ray, please put me out of my misery and marry me.”
The smile on her face went blank, and then her skin paled. “Marry you?”
He rushed on. “It might seem out of the blue, but you know it’s not. You know it’s the only thing we can do to fix the past. I’ll make you happy, Lil. I promise.”
A mixture of emotions flicked over her face, ones he hadn’t seen before. She pulled her hand free of his, then shook her head. She started back to the hotel. “We have to get to the airport. I can’t be late for court.”
Montana wasn’t deterred. Catching up to her, he moved in front of her, put both hands on her shoulders and searched her eyes. “I know it’s this stupid secret. I don’t know how I know, but I know you. I wish I could make you believe this. I don’t care about it. You never have to tell me as long as you will let it get out of our way.”