by Stacey Lynn
“I love you in my shirt, baby. But I’m pretty sure this is better.”
How could he still speak full sentences? I was too far gone.
My need was too great to be sated, but Daemon knew what I needed. One of his hands pressed on my breast. His fingers and thumb played with my nipple and his other hand wrapped around the small of my back. His head fell back onto the headboard and he gazed at me with half-closed eyes as his hips rocked into me.
My core clenched and I felt my wetness increase. My body buzzed and my thighs trembled from holding myself up and squeezing myself around him.
“Daemon,” I groaned again. I was almost there. I could feel everything in my body coiled tightly into a tight little ball, just waiting to blow up.
With a slight grin on his lips, Daemon dropped his head. Then his mouth covered one of my nipples. He sucked, and licked, and pulled it, and the pleasure went right to my core. I gripped the headboard until my knuckles turned white.
Then I shattered. My knees shook, my stomach tightened, and my head fell back as I cried out his name.
Everything left me. Every fear I’d held onto. Every guilty thought I’d carried about Travis and Daemon combined, left on an explosive shout as Daemon gripped me to his hips, and let me ride out my orgasm on his covered erection.
“Damn it,” I exhaled and dropped my head to his shoulder.
Daemon’s shoulders shook; his laugh was low and husky. “That was amazing, Liv. Watchin’ you fall apart like that.”
I hid my furiously heated and flushed cheeks in the crook of his neck. My tongue licked his sensitive skin. I waited for the guilt to creep back in, but it didn’t. For the first time in weeks, my head was completely quiet.
“I can’t believe I just did that,” I quietly admitted, but there was a slight smile on my lips.
Slowly, I felt Daemon shift against me as his hands went back to my hips.
I frowned. “What are you doing?”
He smiled at me before he glanced down at his crotch. “I’m going to take a shower.”
I shook my head. “Let me.”
His eyes narrowed at me, questioning me, but I just nodded.
I slid two fingers into my mouth, wetting them. Daemon’s mouth dropped open before he grinned wickedly. “Fuck, Liv. When did you get so naughty?”
I saw the worry flicker across his eyes as he finished the thought. That what we were doing was wrong—improper. My fingers slipped from my mouth, and I shifted back against his lap so I was sitting on his thighs. “It’s okay, I know what you meant.”
Daemon nodded and then looked down at my fingers on the waistband of his boxers. I pulled them down slowly, raising up from his thighs so I could pull them down further. His hard cock jumped out. I licked my lips, loving the sight of him. Again, I waited for the guilty conscience to speak up. To tell me what we were doing was wrong. That I should be mourning my ex-lover, that making out with a new one was reprehensible.
The voice never came.
Timidly, I took him in my hands. He hissed out a breath and I smiled.
I looked at him with a tentative grin on my face only to see his head against the headboard with a pained grin on his own face.
One of his hands came up and brushed against my cheek. “It’s good to see you smile.”
I ducked my head in embarrassment, and watched my fingers as I tightened them around his shaft. Slowly, I moved down to the base and played with his balls. They were pulled tight and I watched a drop of creamy liquid seep out of the top of his dick.
“You’re going to make me come just by staring at me, baby.”
My grinned widened. “Good. Make it quick then,” I teased.
My hand began pumping him. Slowly, at first, but then I tightened my grip on him and moved faster, up and down. I gasped a breath when Daemon’s hand covered mine.
Together, we jerked him faster. My fingers settled on his tip, rubbing the pre-come all over the top of him while his hand jerked his shaft. My other hand played with his balls, rubbing them and massaging them firmly. My core clenched as I watched and felt Daemon harden right before he let out a groan of pleasure. He roughly called my name; his hand moved from his dick to cover my hand again. Together, we squeezed his dick and milked him as his come shot out of him, straight onto his stomach.
“Fucking hell.”
I smiled. Then I leaned forward and rested my head on Daemon’s shoulder again. I could hear his heart beating crazy fast against my ear as I let out a slow breath.
Home.
It wasn’t the first time I’d felt it in his presence. It was simply the first time I admitted it.
One of Daemon’s hand wrapped around my waist and he held me close, but keeping enough distance from the mess on his stomach. “I wasn’t expecting you to do that.”
I pulled back and looked him straight in the eyes before I dropped a quick kiss on his lips. “I wanted to.”
“You okay?” he asked as he brushed my hair away from my cheeks, behind my ear.
“Fine,” I said, and then I bit the inside of my cheek when he frowned. “I’m good.” I nodded, as if I had tested out the word and found it to be true. “Good. Promise.”
Daemon nodded and then let me go as I shifted off him. “Let me get you a towel.”
I grabbed his old shirt from the bed and threw it on as I hustled to the bathroom. Once Daemon was clean, he wrapped me in his arms and pulled me so he was resting on the bed with his chest to my back.
“Don’t hate me in the morning for that, Liv.”
They were the last words I heard before I was pulled into a dark sleep, completely free from nightmares.
I woke in the morning, nestled into Daemon’s body. He had shifted in the night, and I had moved with him so when I first opened my eyes, my head was resting on his chest and his arm was wrapped underneath me. Even in his sleep, his hand was firmly holding the back of my head, hugging me to him.
I watched him sleep for a moment or two, watched his chest rise and dip slowly, with his deep breathing before I lightly placed a kiss on his cheek. He didn’t stir at all, and only let out a light moan when I untangled myself from his arms and legs.
From the doorway to his room, I turned back and took in his bedroom. I kept expecting to feel wrong. To feel like I had done something disgusting or revolting, but the voice or the feeling I waited for was absent. With a last look at him sleeping in his bed, I shrugged before I threw on a pair of his athletic shorts and made my way to the kitchen for coffee and breakfast.
My heart felt lighter. I missed the baby I would never know. I had felt jealous when I watched Jules with Sophie, seeing that mother daughter bond that I wouldn’t have. But as I crept quietly to the kitchen so as not to wake Ryker or Daemon, there was a slight peace because I knew someday, I would experience it. And when I was able to experience that moment for the first time, I knew the timing would make more sense.
The man, whose child I was carrying, would make more sense; not that I didn’t care about Travis, but I hadn’t cared about him enough. That sadness, the guilt of both of them was something I would carry forever, I knew. But it was never going to be Travis and I with a happy family. We never would have worked.
I would miss his friendship, but any deeper relationship than that was over with long before the day he was shot in front of me.
I made my way to the coffee pot, and probably should have realized it was already full and the power was on, before I noticed the figure sitting at the kitchen table.
He moved and I jumped.
“Shit, Finn!” My hand flew to my chest when I saw him. “Quit scaring the crap out of me.”
He grinned. What was it about this man that made even me want to swoon in his presence?
“Sorry, Olivia.” It had to be the accent. And the grin, I thought. He held up a cup of steaming coffee. “Just havin’ some breakfast.”
“You came here for coffee?” I asked and poured myself a cup before I joined him at the table.
His lips curled over the edge of his cup as I watched him take a quick swallow. “Daemon up?”
I shrugged and blushed. I had just left him naked in his bed, but I wasn’t sure Finn needed to know that.
“Ahh,” he said, and I was sure he read my mind. “I take it he had a late night.”
He winked.
I blushed, and then coughed over my first sip of coffee. “He’s sleeping.”
“How are you?” he asked, setting his cup down as his eyebrows pulled in. His concern looked genuine. I didn’t know Finn well. I was beginning to learn from what Daemon and the other men said that no one knew Finn well. But I liked that he cared; and I liked him.
My lips pursed and twisted into a funny shape. I was beginning to hate the question. “Better, I think.” I shrugged. “Not really sure how to feel most days I guess.”
We were quiet for a beat, the only sound were our sips of coffee before he spoke again. “I lost a kid once.”
My eyes snapped to his. Finn wasn’t looking at me, more through me, or over my shoulder maybe. In fact, I wasn’t sure he was seeing much of anything except a distant memory he tried really hard to never think of.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered and then wanted to kick myself. I hated those two words over the last several days and had hated them after my mom’s death. It wasn’t my fault.
Finn stared at nothing before he shrugged one shoulder. “It might have been for the best, really. The mom… she was messed up, and the baby…” His voice trailed off and I watched him struggle for words. I got the sense he wasn’t talking to me. Maybe to a ghost or simply reliving something horrible he’d experienced and just needed to talk to someone, even if it was a wall. “They both died within a few hours of the child’s birth.”
Tears welled in my eyes. I had been less than three months pregnant. I couldn’t imagine the horror Finn had experienced. “Finn…” I shut my mouth, not knowing what else to say.
He shook his head, and his eyes cleared before he smiled sadly at me. “Anyway, it’ll get easier with time. I just wanted you to know that. It hurts, but sometimes… it sounds cliché or stupid… but sometimes these things have a way of happening when they’re meant to, even when we don’t understand them.”
I nodded and took another drink. Yesterday, that might have hurt and made me angry. Today, it felt like he was putting into words what I had woken up feeling. I was thankful it didn’t make me seem cold. Finn had experienced loss worse than I had.
“Thanks, Finn,” I said quietly. Then to lighten the mood a little bit, I smiled. “That’s quite deep for a biker.”
His smile was sad when he stood up and placed his cup on the counter. “I wasn’t always a biker.”
The door slammed behind him as he walked out, not looking back.
I smiled into my coffee cup, grabbed my phone, and spent the next few minutes in silence checking my email that was usually empty. I frowned when I saw several missed calls from Gunner.
When I pressed the re-dial button to call him back, an idea blossomed in my head. Something Daemon had told me once about being too wild for the straight life.
“Hey Gunner,” I said when he answered his phone on the third ring. I frowned for a minute, not even realizing if it was too early to be calling him.
“Olivia, how are you?”
I rolled my eyes. I could tell he was smiling and concerned at the same time. After assuring him I was fine and I’d want to be back at work in the next week or two, I asked him if he had openings that day.
“For you? You hate needles.”
“I know,” I grinned to myself. I already saw the ink I wanted. “But I need to do this; something to remember everything, and move on at the same time.”
“I’ll fit you in whenever you can make it.”
“Thanks, I’ll see you soon,” I said, before I said good-bye.
“Making plans with another man? Daemon won’t be happy.”
I smiled at Ryker’s voice before I saw him. He may have always felt like my big brother, but good grief, dressed in only shorts and his hair completely messed up, coupled with Daemon’s body in his bed, and Finn’s visit? I was one lucky girl to get to spend all my time with all these dark, broody, sexy as sin men.
“Just Gunner; I have to go to the shop today for a bit.” I bit my lip when Ryker turned his back on me to pour his own cup of coffee. “Think you could take me in later?”
“Can’t Daemon?”
“I sort of want to do this without him.” Ryker frowned and sat in the same seat Finn had just left. “I thought you could take me.”
One eyebrow raised curiously. His arms crossed over his chest and he frowned at me. “I’m not sure he’s going to let you out of his sight. Like, ever again.”
“Please? Just for a few hours. I want to surprise him.”
Ryker rolled his eyes before he agreed. “We should probably head out before he wakes up then. I don’t think he’ll be so willing to let me take you anywhere without his approval.”
“I’ll be ready in ten.” I chugged the last few sips of my cup before I quietly hurried upstairs.
“Where did you take her?” I growled into the phone. I wanted to reach into the phone and strangle my brother. I didn’t hate him, but he could be an asshole.
“Take a breath, brother. She’s just fine.”
He laughed at me. I wanted to throttle him. A million thoughts had been running through my head when I woke up. First, the bed was cold and Liv was simply gone.
I had sunk my head into my hands and I knew. My gut tightened, dread filled my stomach. I had pushed her too far. I had let her go too far last night.
She had run. At the thought that I had lost her… my knuckles were still swollen from the hole I put in my bedroom wall.
The note I found in the kitchen didn’t help much. Scrawled in Liv’s handwriting, that I swear looked as scratchy as something two-year-old Sophie could probably do, were the simple words, Stuff to do. Be back.
It calmed me. Barely. The fact that she said she’d be back helped.
The fact that she sucked Ryker into some secret mission with her, and he thought it was funny as shit that I was worried as hell… that didn’t help shit at all.
She could have sweet-talked his ass into taking her back to New Orleans with him for all I knew. She was slick enough to do it, too.
Shaking the thoughts out of my head, I decided to trust her. I had watched a heaviness leave her last night. It could have been from the orgasm she gave herself, rubbing against me like we were fifteen all over again. But I knew that when she fell asleep, something had changed.
I only hoped she hadn’t woken up in the morning with an even larger mountain of regret pushing down on her shoulders.
I growled again, and my hands tightened around the phone when Ryker’s laugh came through the phone, right before I heard the distinctive click.
The bastard had hung up on me.
“Don’t lose the phone, jackass.”
I glared at Jaden. “Don’t you have somewhere more important to be?” I asked him.
“Where is there a more important place than buggin’ the shit out of you?”
“Shut up, asshole.” I pushed him away and headed into the clubhouse. There wasn’t shit to do there and no one was around this early, but I wasn’t going to sit on my ass just waitin’ for Liv to show up, either.
And somethin’ wasn’t sitting right with me with Sporelli’s quick visit. It was too quick. They had disappeared. No one had seen any sign of the Sporelli family around since Travis was shot and we met with Cain and Hammer. It didn’t make sense. Why wait three weeks?
There were pieces we were missing. Like why Liv would be shot. Why Hammer was so suddenly willing to work with us. I squeezed my eyes shut and pressed the bridge of my nose between my middle fingers. Then I dragged my hands down my face.
Nothing added up; not the attack on Gunner’s tattoo shop, the shooting. Hell, even the fire at the salva
ge yard didn’t make sense. Jimmy and Johnny swore they hadn’t fucked with anything that could make it blow up. They were idiots, but they knew engines and guns. It was why they were able to be prospects in the first place.
I fucking hated loose ends.
“What’s got up your shit hole this morning?”
I bit back my growl. Jaden was just trying to help.
I rubbed my chin, blew out a breath, and looked at him. “You look like shit.”
“Got shit on my mind,” he mumbled before grabbing a beer from the fridge. I shook my head when he offered me one. It was nine in the fucking morning.
I never understood the shit Ryker and Jaden went through. We’d all gone through hell, and survived the trip, at least once in our lives. A biker club upbringing was never easy. Joining the club and livin’ it were harder. But I operated under the idea that when something bad happens, you get even, and move on. Ryker and Jaden never seemed able to crawl their asses out of the pit that this life could hand them.
My phone buzzed in my hand before I could ask Jaden what his shit was. I needed men clear for the next few weeks and even though I suspected it was about Jules, and probably Sophie and Scratch, I was smart enough to know he wouldn’t answer.
Instead, I looked at my phone before it was done with its first vibration and frowned. Jaden was checking the same message.
Church. One hour. Be there.
It was sent from Bull. And if he was calling us in this early on a Saturday then shit wasn’t good. Which meant it was time to force all my concerns about Liv out of my head and figure out the rest.
“You sure you don’t care about Ryker helpin’ us out?” I asked Bull once the meeting was done.
We had just spent hours planning our attack against Sporelli and Black Death. The Black Death MC would finally pay for killing Cherry, Bull’s wife and Liv’s mom. But first, we’d have a big enough showing against Sporelli that would hurt them enough to not show their faces anywhere near Jasper Bay again. They’d know we meant business in protecting our docks and our ports. Then, Black Death would lose their presence here, and we’d take back our fuckin’ town.