Jessica raised her hand to stall Louise and dropped her head heavily against the vanity with a pitiful moan. “I need another day. Another week before I see or entertain anyone.”
“You’ll always need more time. If you while away your days indoors, you’ll waste away to nothing in a matter of months. His Grace is a good, kind friend. You’ll be happy enough to see him and wonder what all the fuss was about in avoiding him once you’ve had tea with him again.”
“I don’t mind seeing Hayden nearly as much as I mind having to entertain Warren.”
“There is no reason you can’t find yourself fashionably late and with no time to spare when Mr. Warren comes by the house.”
Jessica raised her head and stared at her quick-thinking maid. “You’re brilliant, Louise. If I’ve never said it before, heed it now and gloat if you must. You are brilliant and I wouldn’t know what to do without you.”
“I wouldn’t want to work for anyone else, my lady. You have the kindest soul of any gentlewoman I ever worked for.”
Jessica brushed her hair back with her fingers and leaned in closer to the mirror to see how well the maquillage covered her pale complexion. “Now I think you’re using flattery instead of telling me the truth.”
“I wouldn’t dare, my lady. Now sit up so I can properly cover the sorrow that has assailed you these last few weeks.”
She did as asked and let Louise work her magic. Jessica closed her eyes as the makeup brush and puff slid over her skin. When Louise was done, Jessica stood from the vanity, catching sight of her mother’s hat pin in the stack of items left to be righted from her angry outburst. She pulled it from the tray.
A light rapping came at the door just before Mrs. Harper admitted herself.
The housekeeper dipped her head on entering. “His Grace has arrived, my lady. We’ve settled him in the morning parlor.”
Jessica looked at her reflection in the mirror, assessing the dark lines now covered with concealing powder. She definitely looked better now than she had the last time she’d seen her friend.
Why did Hayden always have to be five minutes early? It wouldn’t do to make him wait, either. If she did, he’d just barge into her private chambers and demand an audience; years of letting him do exactly that was at fault here.
“This will do, Louise.” She patted her fingers over her skin, smoothing away bits of loose powder.
Louise stood behind her. Her eyes were wide, her expression sincere. “He won’t notice anything amiss.”
“Yet he will know not all is well.”
“Maybe so,” the maid said sympathetically. “But he’ll know you’re on the mend, my lady.”
Jessica raised a disbelieving brow. She wasn’t so sure of that.
“That’s not to say you aren’t faring better now than when he saw you last,” Mrs. Harper corrected the maid.
“He’ll see that I’m the same as before.” Jessica stood from the small velvet stool and pressed her hands down the front of her dress. “Nothing fits right.”
“It’ll take time to heal,” Mrs. Harper said. “Marie will be sure to put some weight on you before the fall months arrive.”
Marie was the household cook and favored creamy French foods. Jessica probably would be cursing her weight gain before long.
Jessica smoothed her hands over the few loose hairs at the back of her head. Her appearance would have to do. “I had better make haste. Hayden hates to be kept waiting.”
On entering the parlor, Jessica said, “I’m sorry I took so long, darling. I overslept this morning and found myself rushing to throw together an ensemble.”
Hayden wasn’t sitting patiently; in fact, he looked as though he contemplated heading toward her bedchamber just as she entered the parlor. His hat was tossed carelessly on the sofa and his cane leaned up against a small, round side table. He approached her, his gaze assessing her from head to toe, lingering on her face as he wrapped his hands around her upper arms and held her at arm’s length to further inspect her.
“You look well,” he said, surprised.
She rolled her eyes, leaned in and kissed his cheek, and pulled away from him to fall gracefully to the sofa. “Of course I’m well. I’ve done nothing but rest for what feels like forever.”
“It was needed. Though I wish you would have let me come by sooner.”
“I needed time to myself, to think about my future.” To heal without your ever-watchful eye. She would much rather have been able to throw herself into the bustle of society and forget everything that had happened. Instead, in her weakened state, she’d been confined to her house.
“Sit with me, Hayden.” She indicated the seat available beside her.
He took the chair across from her, perched himself on the edge, and placed his elbows on his knees. He was still assessing her and Jessica had to fight the urge to check that her makeup was still in place.
“I can’t stay long,” he said. “I just needed to see you, make sure you were well.”
“You should have come another time, then.” Or better yet, he should have waited until she was ready to see him again. It was difficult to face him after everything she’d been through. After everything he’d seen and done for her. They hadn’t talked about that night. And she hoped he never mentioned it, for she needed no reminders. But it would always stand between them.
“Jess…”
She raised one brow at the shortened form of her true name. He often called her Jess when he was displeased with her. “What could I have possibly done to disappoint you, Hayden?”
“I’m worried, not disappointed.”
“I’m feeling much more myself.”
“And that’s what scares me half to death about you.”
She furrowed her brows. “Why should it? Have I always been a great disappointment to you?”
“Stop putting words in my mouth. You know that’s not true. We wouldn’t be friends if I didn’t have the highest regard and respect for you.” He sat back in the chair, his dark eyes narrowing. “I should have stopped by sooner.”
“And I can’t thank you enough for respecting my wishes by not doing so. You’re not my keeper, Hayden.”
“Someone needs to be.”
“Someone like my husband?” she asked, suddenly outraged. “I’m free of the man and it feels like everyone in my life is trying to slip a hood over my face and jesses around my ankles to keep me leashed and away from any potential trouble.”
“Jess.”
“Stop calling me that,” she snapped, smacking her hands against the cushions on either side of her. After taking a calming breath, she placed her hands over her eyes to block out the light around her. She wanted to hood herself and be blind to the outside world for eternity sometimes. “I’m sorry. I find myself overwhelmed at the oddest of times.”
The sofa dipped next to her. Hayden pulled her hands away from her face, and his comforting arms wrapped around her. “I can’t promise your life will get easier, but you never have to pretend with me, Jess.”
“It’s been easier to hide from society. I’m never one to be afraid, but when I imagine facing those who have disliked me for so long I’m filled with fear.”
“You never cared what they thought before, and I don’t think you should start. I won’t let you hide away in this smothering household for much longer.”
She rested her head on his shoulder, enjoying the closeness and comfort of his embrace. They’d been much more intimate around each other ever since …
“It’s been difficult to leave. But you’ll be happy to know that I’m ready to face the ton again.” Why she admitted to something she wasn’t entirely sure about she couldn’t say.
“We don’t have to cause any havoc around Town, but you do need to at least show yourself at a few soirees. The gossips are already speculating about your absence.”
“I know. I’ve been reading the papers. The Mayfair Chronicler has been having a heyday with speculations about me, about you … us.”
His arms fell away, and she wanted them back. She felt safe with them wrapped around her. She didn’t say so, though, because it felt inappropriate, considering the topic at hand.
“You’ve never cared about what they thought before.”
“I’ve barely left the house. Of course I bought into all the hype the Chronicler has built around various tales regarding me.”
“If I knew who they were, I’d hang them out to dry.”
Jessica placed her hand over his forearm. “You and half the ton, I’m sure.”
* * *
Hayden put his fingers under her chin and turned her head to face him. Sitting so close, he could see the obvious signs of fatigue and her attempt to cover the evidence with maquillage.
He searched her eyes, trying to make out her feelings. He stood from the sofa and gave her his hand. Now that he’d stopped in to see her, he didn’t want to leave. The past week away from her had been pure torture.
“My appointment can wait. I think a stroll in the park is in order.”
She assessed him before taking his hand. “Warren sent a calling card. I have to meet with him in less than an hour.”
Hayden’s jaw clenched, his back teeth grinding in irritation. “Why is he even coming here? He has no right to trouble you.”
“He has every right. We both know the Fallon seat is his. And it could be sooner if he found out there is no hope of an heir from me.” She looked away as though embarrassed. “That is easily confirmed by a doctor.”
“And he’ll never be given the opportunity to bring a doctor around,” Hayden snapped unintentionally. Reining in his frustration, he said, “Warren can be kept waiting.”
Jessica’s expression looked defeated. “You’re right, of course. And I appreciate that you’ve come to cheer me up, but I won’t keep you from your appointments.”
“I hate seeing you in this state.” Hayden retrieved his hat and cane and pulled Jessica to her feet before she could protest any further. “Let’s walk in the park and arrive late for your meeting with Warren. I can’t wait to see his face when we stroll in together half an hour late.”
Jessica twisted her fingers together in a nervous fashion. Then abruptly she stopped and walked over to a writing desk. “Let me pen a note for him.”
“Why does he even deserve that courtesy? He hasn’t relented with any of your requests.”
“Because he holds my life precariously in his hands, Hayden. Don’t be a boor. It’ll take me but a moment; then you’ll have me all to yourself for the rest of the morning.”
He liked the ring of that: all to himself. He hoped he had enough time to cajole the old Jez out to play. He should have come by sooner, but she’d asked him to stay away and he could do no more than respect her wishes. They hadn’t discussed all that had transpired, nor did he intend to stir painful memories by mentioning it until she was ready to discuss it.
Jez went over to the bellpull and called for the butler to have a maid bring down her hat and shawl. Then she wrote her note to Warren.
“Warren will be livid when he finds that I’m not here and that I’m gallivanting around Town instead.”
“We are simply catching a breath of fresh air.” Hayden tapped his chin thoughtfully with the eagle tip of his cane. “That’s if you can call it fresh air in this heat.”
Jessica’s maid brought down a light shawl and assisted in tying the satin ribbon of her bonnet beneath her chin. He couldn’t believe she was willingly leaving her house. Was she humoring him, or was she happy to leave this godforsaken place for a few hours after weeks of self-imposed solitude?
“Around the Serpentine, darling?” she asked, her mood already lighter.
Hayden’s smile was slow and sure.
In the sunshine, Hayden saw the telltale signs that Jez was on the mend. Her hair was shinier, her skin not as wan, and her clothes were marginally tighter on her willowy frame. More important, her disposition was a great deal happier. Perhaps he was worrying too much. It was hard not to do so after everything she’d been through.
He tucked her arm firmly against his side and patted her hand. What he wanted more than anything was to thread his fingers though hers, raise her gloved hand to his mouth, and press his lips to the frilled edge at the back of her wrist.
Dangerous thoughts, those. But hadn’t he already determined that she would be his? Yes, soon enough. Right now, though, she needed to heal.
Jessica was taller than most women of his acquaintance, so she easily kept stride with him as they strolled toward the entrance gates of the park.
“So tell me why Warren is visiting.”
“He is having an inventory of the house completed. I suppose he’ll have to amalgamate both his residences here in Town.”
Hayden’s hand squeezed hers lightly with the news. “Why does he need to do this right now?”
She looked away from him, focusing on the picnicking families and small gatherings of friends who had found a nice patch of grass to sit on as they fed chunks of bread to the ducks.
“The house will be his in a matter of months, Hayden. Fighting him is nothing more than an exercise in futility. We both know there is nothing I can do to change that outcome.”
“He can at least show some decency and wait out the year before he takes charge of your household.”
She sighed heavily. “It’s not in his nature to wait for anything when it’s rightfully his to take.”
“And for how long have you known him?”
“Longer than I ever wanted to, I assure you. He is in a difficult position, too, Hayden.”
Hayden pulled Jessica to a stop and turned her so he could look her in the eye. “Why have you given up your fight?”
She shrugged away from his hold. “I don’t expect you to understand.”
“Help me to comprehend this colossal change in heart, Jessica. It was agreed that you could stay in the house for one year.”
She walked on, though he still had a light hold of one of her arms and didn’t release her till her fingers slipped completely from his grasp.
“You invited me for a walk.” She nodded her head toward their abandoned path. “Don’t make me finish on my own.”
She didn’t glance back at him again, just continued without him. He caught up to her before long, noticing the glances they were receiving from others strolling through the park.
“Explain to me why you think you are leaving sooner than the allotted year.”
“Your devotion means the world to me. It also means you keep me out of trouble,” she said with a sly wink.
His voice was low as he said, “I’m sorry. I’m the last person in the world who would judge you.”
She looked at him sidelong, her gaze disbelieving. “A bald lie coming from you. You’re always the first to criticize something you deem inappropriate.”
“Only when it’s to protect your reputation,” he said, tucking her arm against his side again.
Her laugh was throaty and had a few more heads turning in their direction. “You’re an ass, Hayden. And it’s too late to protect me from the scathing views society holds over me.”
Though her words were harsh, they both knew there was some truth in them.
“All the more reason for us to sojourn in the countryside.” That had been his first suggestion with the announcement of Fallon’s death. She had refused. Now Hayden wanted her alone and to himself, somewhere he could watch her without having to worry about the trouble she’d find.
“Again with this?” she said.
“Yes, and I’ll not let it rest until you are in complete agreement with me on the matter.”
“That would feel too much like running away with a tail tucked between my legs. I’ll face the ton head-on and show them that their hatred for me simply doesn’t affect me.”
He didn’t point out that she was the one lying now; they both knew that she did care about the ton’s opinions. Perhaps it was time to face facts: Only Jessica could
help herself in this instance. And now that her husband was dead and his fortune no longer accessible to her, she would have to take better care to stop the wagging of gossips’ tongues.
But Hayden’s name could protect her.
That had the wheels turning in his head. Of course, it was so simple a solution.
“So what will you do now that you are free from the bonds of marriage?” he asked.
“I imagine everyone thinks I’ll remarry.”
He fell behind a step, the news hitting him like an unblocked punch to the face. What was she saying? Was she open to the idea? “Will you?”
She didn’t answer him for a few moments, and he nearly asked her to clarify what she meant, until she said, “I’ve had nothing but time to think about my circumstance over the past few weeks. Remarrying would probably be for the best. Though I’m not sure I can allow any man to rule my life as Fallon did.”
Was she honestly considering marriage? Was that why she wasn’t batting a lash at Warren for taking residence sooner than what was agreed upon?
“Not all men are cut from the same cloth.” Least of all him.
She rested her head on his shoulder; the action was brief enough to draw speculative looks, but she righted herself with a sigh, ignoring the censure in every direction.
“There aren’t a lot of options left open to me. And it doesn’t appear that I’ll be able to sway Warren to my favor.”
Hayden couldn’t believe they were discussing this at all. He could barely process the idea of Jez agreeing to remarry. If anyone was going to marry her …
It would be him.
He rubbed his hand over his face. She liked to keep him on his toes. You never knew when Jez was going to say “jump,” “stop,” or “fall.”
“Then you should marry me.”
She laughed, obviously not taking him seriously. “Don’t jest with me, Hayden.”
He could only look at her, perplexed. Of course she wouldn’t take his offer seriously. He’d gone about asking her all wrong.
The Scandalous Duke Takes a Bride Page 5