My So-Called Bollywood Life

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My So-Called Bollywood Life Page 7

by Nisha Sharma


  “Raj got Gurinder Chadha as the guest of honor for the film festival, and I’m so happy for the festival but so mad because it’ll be practically impossible for me to get into NYU, and I’ll end up with this stupid prophecy that won’t come true while working at the theater forever, and I don’t like being a defeatist but I feel like I lost and I’m not even hormonal!”

  “Oh, beta,” her mother said soothingly. She opened her arms and Winnie stepped into them, rested her head on her mother’s shoulder, and wailed. She’d cried more in the last week and a half than she had in the last year, but maybe things had been too easy for her, and her luck had run out.

  As she was rocked in the softest of arms, Winnie knew that she’d somehow work through this. After all, her mom was there to help now that the only thing left to do with her broken dream was to pick up the pieces.

  7

  DELHI-6

  ★★★★★

  This film has the stereotypical grandmother: widow, wears white, cries all the time, and sits on a cot while pickling mangos. Come on, B-town! They aren’t all like that. My grandmother is a widow who loves pickled mangos, but she’d prefer a Sealy mattress to a cot, and her clothes are from Macy’s.

  Winnie’s mom set a cup of chai on the kitchen table along with a plate of cake rusk to dip in the hot liquid. Winnie huddled over the milky tea infused with cardamom and inhaled deeply, while her grandmother stood at her left, rubbing her arm.

  “I’m s-s-sorry I’m a mess just when you g-got here, Nani,” Winnie said. She had spent the last ten minutes venting while her grandmother and mother patiently listened.

  “Bechari,” the older woman said. “My poor girl.” Nani’s mint-green pants and mint-green velvet-lined top smelled like incense and India, which was an added comfort. Winnie leaned into the soft velvet and took a breath. It made her feel a little better.

  “You know what? I can call Raj’s mother right now,” Winnie’s mom said. “I’ll tell her to straighten her boy out. He should’ve known what this would do to your plans.”

  “Mom, p-please don’t. That would be even more embarrassing. Especially since he’s not doing anything wrong.”

  “That cow woman doesn’t know how to raise her own children. I never liked her. And she thinks she is constantly dressed for a Miss India pageant now that she has money. Did you see her at temple last time? So gaudy.”

  Winnie tried for a shaky smile. “That won’t do anything. Instead of being the cheating ex, Raj is trying to be the hero, even though he still hasn’t apologized for cheating. How am I supposed to hate him when he did something nice and it’s Mr. Reece who’s messing up my future? Stupid rules.”

  Her mother said to Nani, “Maybe if they were together, this wouldn’t have happened. He wants her back, you know.”

  “Mom, that’s not—”

  Nani let out a soft “oh ho.” “Samajh aaya. I got it. He wants to be your destiny, but you don’t want him to be. He’s doing this nice thing for you, but it’s made things worse for your college application so you still believe he’s not your destiny. My poor bacha. I’m so sorry he’s not the one for you anymore.”

  “She doesn’t know that yet,” her mom said over her shoulder as she went to the stove. She picked up a large wooden ladle to stir the contents of her stockpot.

  “She knows,” Nani said. “She told us with her own mouth. If my granddaughter cries with sadness when her old boyfriend tries to surprise her, don’t you think he doesn’t know how to make her happy? But, Winnie, your mother is right, too. Pandit Ohmi gave you everything you need to know, and you still manage to make things so confusing.”

  “Well, I don’t expect you to get it, Nani. Your generation is old-fashioned enough to believe that Pandit Ohmi is one hundred percent right.”

  “Don’t be calling me old. Next time I’ll be whopping you with my chappal.”

  Winnie looked down to see if her grandmother was wearing sandals. Even with cataracts, her grandmother had killer aim. She could hit any target with one of her chappals. Thankfully she was barefoot today.

  “Beta,” her mother said. “You have to promise me you’ll be open to having Raj in your life again.”

  “Can’t you for once see how he’s not the one for me and take my side?”

  Her grandmother stroked her hair. “I can pray that after this is done he becomes a roach in his next life.”

  Winnie coughed. “Thanks, Nani, but yeah. Not helpful.”

  Nani leaned back in her chair. “Okay, maybe we can come up with another solution that doesn’t involve Raj to get this Mr. Reece to see that you’re important to the club.”

  “Ma, don’t get her into any trouble,” Winnie’s mom said. “She already has to work to pay for taking Raj’s movies.”

  The older woman’s eyes sparkled. “Yes, I heard. Good job, beta.”

  “Muma!” Winnie’s mother cried.

  Winnie interrupted before her mother could start arguing with Nani. “I don’t even want to go to school tomorrow. What am I supposed to say to everyone? ‘Yeah, Raj did a great job finding Gurinder Chadha. I’m excited to meet her and just as excited to be kicked out of the festival.’ This is worse than Raj dumping me for Jenny Dickens.”

  “You’ve mentioned to me more than once that Raj is dating another girl,” her mother said with a raised eyebrow.

  “What? Mom, that’s not the point—”

  “It could be. Either way, you have to go to school tomorrow to find out. I didn’t raise a coward.”

  “I know, but, Mom—”

  “Oh, don’t give me that American ‘but, Mom’ attitude. You’re Indian. You face this drama. It’s in your dhadkan, your heartbeat.”

  “And like every other Indian,” Nani said with a twinkle in her eye, “you create some more drama as a distraction.” She saluted Winnie with her glass, which she’d picked up off the kitchen table. It had a pineapple wedge perched on the rim.

  Winnie sighed. “I don’t want more drama. I just want all this to disappear. And anyway, it feels like Raj is so much better at this stupid drama stuff than I am.”

  “Winnie, it sounds like you need to understand what you want first so you can tell Raj clearly that his actions are hurting you, no matter how well intentioned they are. Then, after that, you’ll know how to talk to him about sharing the film-festival responsibilities.”

  “I don’t even know where to start. I accepted Pandit Ohmi’s prediction as truth for so long that I have no idea what I want instead of what I’ve been told I should want.”

  “It doesn’t have to be that hard for you,” Nani asked. “Is there someone else who is making Raj’s interference seem confusing?”

  “No way,” Winnie said, even though Dev’s face popped into her mind.

  “Oh? That was very adamant,” her grandmother mused.

  Winnie busied herself with pulling at the ends of her hair. There was no way she was going to respond to that comment.

  “Maybe your movies will give you the answer,” Winnie’s mother said. “Go and clean up. You’ll come up with something before school tomorrow.”

  Winnie nodded, thinking that watching some Bollywood would be a good way to clear her head. She kissed her grandmother first, then her mother, and with one last wave over her shoulder, she headed upstairs.

  She was feeling better about her situation, even though she knew she’d be back to dealing with a constant roiling nausea when school started the next morning. Until then, she could binge on something good and then head to the Sunday film-club showing. Winnie debated checking her online library, but her classic disc collection called her name. She scanned the boxes displayed on the floor-to-ceiling bookcases, which framed a TV in the middle of the wall unit. After choosing one of her favorites from the sixties, she flopped on her bed and picked up her phone. First things first, she thought.

  “Hey, Bridge? Thanks for the heads-up.”

  “What are you going to do?” Bridget said on the other end of the phone
.

  “I’ll see Mr. Reece and then grovel. There is nothing else I can do.”

  “What about Raj? If he’s still with Jenny, then he’s as much of a douche as I imagined. Now everyone’s going to expect you and Raj to make up.”

  “Except for Dev Khanna,” Winnie said. “I ran into him today and he didn’t have very friendly thoughts toward Raj. He works at the Rose, apparently. Small world, right?”

  “The Rose? Henry didn’t mention that Dev worked with him. You have to admit that he’s got that brooding artsy type down. He’s like Raj’s opposite. And the best part is that he has nothing to do with that prophecy of yours. Hey, maybe that’s what you need. A break from some fantasy. Spend some time with him.”

  “My mom thinks I should still give Raj a chance. So basically, she said the opposite.”

  “Well, I think she’s wrong. You guys look like you’ll fit together.”

  Winnie thought of the click she felt with Dev. “Bridget, even though he is really…interesting, I can’t right now.”

  “Come on, isn’t it so much hotter being with a guy that your mom thinks is wrong for you? I say go for it. Use him as a distraction if you can. Being with him might give you a different perspective.”

  Winnie had no idea what kind of perspective Bridget expected her to get from dating someone else who hadn’t even made a move on her…sort of.

  “I hate to cut off your weird matchmaking dreams, but I need to drown myself in a Vyjayanthimala movie,” she said. “Since you aren’t coming to the film screening, see you tomorrow in school?”

  “Yeah, sorry I can’t be there,” Bridget said. “If I don’t see you before film club, I want a text play-by-play on your meeting with our new Wil Wheaton wannabe faculty advisor,” she said.

  “Deal.”

  * * *

  —

  Winnie knew she was dreaming when she opened her eyes and the air around her lay warm and heavy on her skin. She stood in a gym. A vintage spray-painted Volkswagen was parked in the corner, and a lower level framed by large windows was converted into a dance floor. A lofted second story faced the gym.

  Winnie felt another breeze between her legs and looked down. “Gah!” she shrieked, and wrapped her arms around herself. She was half-naked in a pair of Lycra booty shorts and a matching sports bra. Her feet, encased in white sneakers, were the most modestly covered part of her body.

  Shah Rukh Khan strolled into the room. His chest was covered in blue Lycra, and the fabric gleamed as he moved closer and tossed her a sweatshirt. She immediately put it on over her tiny outfit.

  “Holy crap! Now I know how Karisma Kapoor felt in Dil To Pagal Hai in this outfit.”

  Shah Rukh Khan grinned. “Times have changed. Actresses are forced to wear less and less. I still prefer the Indian clothes, but we do what we have to in order to please our audience, right?”

  “Yeah, I guess. I’ve never been a fan of the naked look,” she said. Winnie hesitated before heading over to the drum set. She sat behind it and tapped one of the cymbals until it hummed with a sweet ring.

  “You know,” she said, “things would be so much easier if my life was like a Bollywood movie. I’d be my own hero and get my happily-ever-after. But instead I’m pretty sure the prophecy won’t come true before my eighteenth birthday, like it’s supposed to, and the only time I ever dated someone who could match the prophecy, I don’t want him anymore.”

  Shah Rukh Khan bounced a basketball, then launched it into the air. It made a swooshing sound through the net hanging from one of the gym’s beams.

  He tsked and said, “That sounds like you’ve given up. Are you going to go home and watch my movies now?”

  She shrugged. “Probably. What else is there to do?”

  “Think about the big picture.” Shah Rukh Khan tossed her the ball. “You may not believe in it, but you really do have destiny on your side.”

  Winnie was surprised at the feel of the basketball in her hands. She traced a solid black line before she tossed it back to him. “You’re supposed to agree with me. You’re from my subconscious.”

  Shah Rukh Khan dropped the ball and kicked it to the side. He started walking backward toward the dark hallway at the end of the gym. “And isn’t it strange that even your subconscious thinks you’re interfering with destiny by using free choice as a weapon?”

  “What? So not true!” she yelled after him.

  “All I’m saying is that if you really desire something from the heart, Winnie, then the whole universe will work with you to get you that. Destiny is showing you the way, and you just have to listen to it. Until next time!”

  Winnie watched as he disappeared into a cloud of gray smoke. “Your advice is getting worse with your age, but at least your acting isn’t.” She picked up the basketball, which had rolled to her feet, and tossed it toward the hoop, enjoying the satisfying sound of the swish as she made nothing but net.

  * * *

  —

  Winnie woke as quickly as she had the last time she dreamed of Shah Rukh Khan. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes, and with images of the actor still circling in her mind, she crawled to the edge of the bed so she could pick up her laptop off the floor. She opened her electronic movie library and scrolled until she saw Dil To Pagal Hai. She hadn’t watched that movie since she was with Raj. It had so many parallels to the prophecy that Pandit Ohmi had given her. Maybe watching Shah Rukh Khan on-screen could help her come to terms with potentially giving Raj a second chance.

  As the first song-and-dance number played, Winnie tried to muster up as much positivity as possible, but she couldn’t stop thinking that if destiny was on her side, it couldn’t produce Raj as her soul mate. Destiny would have to come up with another solution to her prophecy.

  8

  AAINA / MIRROR

  ★★★★★

  It’s important to remember that a villain is always the hero in their own movie. They may think they’re doing the right thing, but doesn’t mean they’re right.

  “Winnie, did you hear?”

  “Man, dude has some moves for trying to win you back.”

  “Isn’t Gurinder one of your favorites?”

  “Do you think he did this for you?”

  She barely made it to lunch before she had to shut herself in one of the dance studios and go through a quick yoga deep-breathing routine. Mixed with her sleep deprivation, everyone’s radiating love for Raj weighed on her heart harder than the breakup itself had. On top of that, she had no idea what Mr. Reece was going to say in their meeting after school now that Raj had proved himself to be so valuable to the film festival.

  Her phone buzzed as she reached the auditorium after final bell.

  DEV: I met some people when I was working on a sizzle reel about huffing. Rough guys. They said they can hide the body where no one will find it.

  She grinned at the message. Even though she hadn’t seen him all day, he’d been sending her random images from horror films with Raj’s face photoshopped into them.

  WINNIE: Thanks, but your phone is potential evidence. We have to keep him alive now. Better take out someone else.

  DEV: A Star Trek faculty advisor maybe?

  WINNIE: Haha, will let you know how this goes.

  DEV: Good luck.

  Winnie turned off her phone before stepping into the auditorium and almost running into Jenny Dickens. Jenny looked up; her eyes, lined in neon green, widened.

  “What are you doing here?” she said. She looked over her shoulder at Raj, who sat at the edge of the stage.

  “Mr. Reece asked me to come.”

  Her shoulders relaxed a little. “Oh. That’s right. I know you want to be the most important person in this film club, but those days are over now that Raj has me to help him. Trying to win him back won’t accomplish anything.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “You heard me,” she said, moving her head like a bobble doll. “I know everyone is saying you guys should make up since you’re the
golden couple, but that will never happen. He’s doing things for himself now and people are giving him the attention he deserves. You won’t get him back just because you want to take credit for his work now more than ever. Not while I’m here.”

  Winnie’s eyes narrowed. She stepped forward until she was nose to nose with Jenny. “For someone who’s known Raj for a fraction of the time I have, you’re pretty cocky, Jenny. Just remember—I’ll always have history with the club, with the festival, and especially with my ex-boyfriend.”

  She smiled when Jenny backed up.

  “Whatever. I know you’re trying to take him from me, but stay away from Raj, Winnie the Pooh. He’s mine now.”

  “Oh, so clever,” Winnie said. Jenny gave her a wide berth and left the auditorium.

  Winnie strode down the aisle to where Raj was waiting.

  “What did you say to her?” he asked.

  “She was catty. She hissed and I roared.” She curled her fingers to imitate claws and meowed. “Your new girlfriend has a mean streak.”

  He grunted. “She’s not…whatever. Jenny is protective. It’s overwhelming sometimes.”

  “Oh yeah? Well, you dated a super freak like me, so I’m sure you’ll work it out with her.”

  He looked down at his phone. “I don’t want to.”

  “What?”

  “Winnie, I told you that I want us to have another shot. That’s why I wanted you to keep the bracelet.”

  “Oh no you don’t. I’m giving that back to you.”

  “No. It’s yours. You’ll see once I deal with Jenny. I need to figure out how to tell her straight because right now she doesn’t understand that I want to end things. I made a mistake.” He rubbed his hands over his face. “She’s the one who took my phone and posted all those stupid things online about us. She and I will never have what you and I have.”

 

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