by Cari Simmons
“Seriously? Seriously?” Sofia repeated. I hadn’t heard her come up behind me. Her voice sounded incredulous.
“Hey, Sofia,” I said softly. “I’m sorry about before.”
“You think that Molly is going to the Olympics?” Sofia asked Roseann.
“Well, yeah. She said that—”
“She told you that? She told you that she is as good as Kelsey?” Sofia’s voice grew louder with each question. “Molly told you that she is working on a routine for the upcoming Olympics?”
I didn’t have to turn to know that all activity in the gym had stopped. Every gymnast halted her extensions and body tightening to listen.
All their eyes bored into my back. My face turned redder than my leotard.
I glanced over my shoulder. A few cheerleaders peeked through the locker-room door. Was that Shrimp’s giant purple bow? The tall cheer coach appeared, waving them inside. I whirled back around, embarrassed.
“Molly?” Roseann asked. Confusion clouded her face.
“I’m not going to this Olympics,” I admitted.
“This Olympics? Don’t think I’m being mean, Molly, but you’re dreaming,” Sofia said.
“I didn’t mean this one. That came out wrong. Roseann, I’m not going to the Olympics. Ever,” I said quietly.
“What are you talking about?” Roseann demanded.
“It was a misunderstanding.” I wished so many people weren’t listening.
“But you told me you were going to be a world champion.”
“No, I didn’t. You said that,” I protested.
“Even if that’s true, you didn’t correct me,” Roseann countered. “Ever!”
“I tried to. Kind of. It’s just that . . . I thought we’d laugh about it later. A joke, you know?” I said feebly.
“A joke? I don’t get your humor, Molly. You think everything’s funny. Do you think it would’ve been funny if I’d handed in this article?” Roseann cried. “Newspapers are supposed to report the truth!”
“I wasn’t going to let you do that,” I admitted. “I swear I was going to stop you today.”
“Today? Why not last week, before I begged Mrs. Murphy to let me write about you? Or this week, when you knew I was working so hard on the article?”
Tears stung my eyes. How could I explain to Roseann how much I’d wanted to be her friend? How I’d picked her out on that very first day? How I’d been so afraid I’d mess up everything by telling her?
“I’m so sorry,” I said. “Maybe we could just switch the article a bit. I’ll talk to Mrs. Murphy. I’ll tell her it was my fault.”
“Forget it, Molly.” Roseann turned to Chrissy. “I want to go home.”
“Sorry. I think we should leave,” Chrissy said to Alex. He’d been staring at me this whole time, his expression changing from amusement to sympathy. Roseann headed towards the door.
“Sure, no problem.” Alex jumped to attention when Chrissy followed Roseann. “Molly, you coming?”
I glanced behind me again. At some point, Sofia had left my side and returned to the floor. Now she ran through her front handspring–front tuck. All the other gymnasts were back to the bars or vault or whatever they’d been doing before. No cheerleaders remained. Even though no one was watching me, I concentrated hard to keep back my tears.
“Molly?” Alex called.
Andre appeared by my side. “Practice is not over yet,” he said to Alex. “You come back in thirty minutes, yes? Moll-le, you go to beam.”
I didn’t move. I stared into Andre’s ice-blue eyes, willing him to see that I needed a hug and not a front walkover. He didn’t get it. Not the way Daria would have. Not the way Eden would have.
I watched Sofia split-leap across the mats, so into her own routine. Then I gazed at Roseann, tapping her foot by the door where she and Chrissy waited. Which would be worse—staying at the gym or sitting next to Roseann in the back seat?
I groaned. How did I create such a colossal mess?
I followed Alex to the car, leaving Andre and the gym behind. I didn’t belong in this gym. I had known that days ago. Maybe my friendship with Roseann could still be fixed.
Roseann spent the car ride home staring out the window. She wouldn’t look at me or talk to me. The only time she spoke was when Chrissy asked, “Should we stop for ice cream?”
“Definitely not,” Roseann said.
“I’m sorry,” I said again, quietly, so only she could hear.
Roseann didn’t answer.
The airline ticket rested on top of my large canvas duffel bag the next morning. Inside I’d packed two pairs of pajamas and many different changes of clothes. Almost half of my closet. I was all ready to go. Picking up my phone, I reread the texts Eden and I had sent late last night.
guess what????
what???
Im comin 2morrow
here????
yes!!!! Flyin in 4 wkend
OMG!!!!! happy dance!!!!! & guess what? we have 1/2 day skool!
can I sleep over?
yes!! y r u comin???
dad wants me 2 visit
XCELLENT! Darias w me on Sat??
def!
cant w8 to C U!!!!
me 2!!
Last night, I’d tossed and turned and twisted up my blankets, trying to fall asleep. Finally, at midnight, I’d crawled out of bed to sit at my desk. In the dark, I stared at the ticket on my bulletin board. The answer to my problem was right in front of me. I’d go to Arizona for the weekend!
I had the ticket. Plus Dad had said I could come anytime. Eden was still awake, and we texted. I packed my cutest outfits. I was totally pumped. Now that I had started thinking about going, I couldn’t stop.
All I had to do was call Dad.
And tell Mom. But she was fast asleep.
I dialed Dad’s number on my cell, but I didn’t press Send.
I wasn’t sure what exactly to say to him. I wanted to ask him if I could stay. Not just for the weekend. Stay forever. I’d slip right back into school, Daria’s gym, and my group of friends, as if I’d only been on vacation. I’d ask Carmen to bring me to the barn to meet Buddy. Maybe I’d finally ride a horse. It was the perfect plan.
I crept back into bed without calling. Should I ask him now or after the plane had landed? I fell asleep before I could decide.
Now I sat cross-legged on my bedroom floor and dialed Dad.
“Hello?” His voice sounded heavy with sleep.
I groaned. I’d forgotten it was four o’clock in the morning there. “Hi, Dad, it’s me.”
“Molly? What’s wrong?” he cried, startled and confused. “Who’s hurt?”
“No one’s hurt. I’m sorry it’s so early. I wanted to talk to you.” I tried to be extrapeppy to make up for the early hour. “I’m going to use that plane ticket you gave me to visit you!”
“Hmmm, that’s great.” He yawned. I heard him fumble around on his nightstand for his glasses. “Why don’t we talk about that idea later today?”
“That’s just it. I’m coming today. I went online and checked the airline. A flight leaves this morning and lands early afternoon. You can pick me up at the airport, right?”
“What?” Now he sounded fully awake. “Today? What’s going on there? Are you okay?”
“I’m fine. I really miss you and Arizona. I want to see you,” I said. “Please?” I wasn’t lying. I did miss him.
“Well . . . sure. Okay. A visit is good.” He paused. “Your mom is on board with this sudden plan?”
“Totally.” That was a lie. I hadn’t told Mom . . . yet. I’d been working up the nerve—and giving her time for her morning coffee. I needed a ride to the airport and for her to say yes, and there was no chance of either happening precoffee. Plus, if Dad said yes first, maybe that would help convince her.
“Okay, then, a weekend visit. What time do you and Alex arrive?” he asked.
“Not Alex. Just me.” My voice quavered as I pushed on. “And Dad? I was thinking I’d
stay longer than a weekend. Wouldn’t it be great if I lived with you? I could ride horses with Carmen, and I’d be a real help around the house.”
Dad said nothing for the longest time, and for a moment, I feared he’d fallen back to sleep.
“Molly, honey, what’s going on there?” he asked finally. “You know the arrangement your mom and I have. You and Alex live with her. It’s not that I don’t want you and love you, but I travel all the time for my business, and Carmen is a flight attendant. We’re just not home enough.”
“Yeah, but, maybe there’s a way—” I tried.
“Whoa, Molly. I’m not awake enough for this conversation. I don’t know why you want to leave your mom—”
“I don’t want to leave her,” I interrupted him.
“Molly, I promise I will help you solve whatever problem you are having, but jumping on a plane may not be the answer,” he cautioned.
“You don’t know that,” I said.
He sighed. “I don’t. Let me think on it and talk to your mom. Hang tight for bit, honey. I love you.”
We said good-bye. A minute later, the house phone rang. I knew Dad was calling Mom. Now I wished I’d talked with her first.
I inspected the ticket. I couldn’t imagine abandoning Mom. She cut my fruit the way I liked it. We snuggled on the sofa together at night with cookie-dough ice cream and watched food reality shows. She could tell when I needed a hug and when I needed to be left alone. Dad was often more fun than Mom, but he didn’t know any of that.
I didn’t really want to live with Dad and Carmen.
I just didn’t want to go to Hillsbury Middle School today.
Or ever.
What I wanted was to live with Mom and Alex, but not here.
My phone buzzed. A group message sent by Anna.
Remember—black skirt, black tank, black flats, blow-out hair, and dark red lipstick!!!
Had Roseann not told Anna what had happened? Was I still part of the group? I watched as Grace, Fiona, Miranda, and Roseann texted that they agreed.
Molly? Do u have all? Anna texted the group when I didn’t respond.
I’d assumed Roseann had kicked me out by now. I twisted my silver ring nervously. Should I tell them I wasn’t showing up for the talent show? That I was flying to Arizona?
I have an xtra black tank if u need, Roseann texted the group.
Don’t need, I texted back.
Tonight I’d see Eden. Lying in her trundle bed with her old smiley-face comforter wrapped around me in the dark, I’d tell her what had happened with Roseann. All of it. Eden would know what to do. Maybe her mom had written a blog about it.
“Running out on me?” Mom poked her head in my doorway. Her cheeriness sounded forced. “Flying off?”
“No. I just thought I’d visit Dad.”
Looking suspiciously at my packed bag, she kicked off her heels, then sat next to me on my rug. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” I made my voice sound casual. “Dad gave me the ticket. He said I could use it whenever I wanted. I want to go now. Dad said it was okay.”
“He said you wanted to stay longer. A lot longer.”
I heard the hurt in her voice and felt horrible. “It was just a silly thought. I don’t want to leave you. It has nothing to do with you. Really.” I gulped. “Can I go for the weekend?”
“Molly, I think it’s great that you want to see your dad.” She spoke softly. “I would never stop you. I just wish you’d spoken to me first before rushing ahead.”
I grimaced. “I do that a lot. Rush ahead.”
“You do,” Mom agreed.
“Can I go? The plane leaves soon. I’m all packed.”
Mom pressed her fingertips together. “You can’t miss school.”
“But . . .” I thought about telling her some other story to convince her. Then, without warning, the whole horrible Roseann Project–Olympics story tumbled out.
Mom gathered me in her arms, and I pressed my face against her soft sweater. “Making friends is hard, Molly. I know. Do you realize I haven’t met anyone outside my office yet?”
“We should hang out together,” I joked halfheartedly.
“I’d like that.” She gave me a reassuring squeeze.
I hadn’t realized that Mom was having a hard time too. Now that I thought about it, I wasn’t the only one who had left folks behind in Arizona. My mom had given up my aunt Kelly and her friend Lora in the move.
“Why’d you move us if we had to leave the people we liked?” I asked. “I mean, I know you got the good job and all, but . . .”
“The job is a big thing, Molly. Big financially and big for me.” She twirled a strand of her hair, silent for a moment. “I needed a fresh start. Since your dad left, I’d been stuck. He moved forwards. He found Carmen. I needed to jump-start my life, and I had to make a big change to do that.”
“You didn’t even ask me,” I said quietly.
“I know. I made a selfish choice, but I really think it will be good for our family. Alex seems to really like it here. I hope, in time, you will too.” She scratched my back exactly where it feels best. “We both have to give it some time.”
“I can’t face Roseann today,” I confessed.
“Running away from your problems isn’t the answer. Roseann sounds like a nice girl. I’m sure she’ll get over this.”
“That’s why I should wait until Monday,” I insisted. “It’ll be better then.”
“You’re tougher than you think, Molly,” she promised me.
“Everything is harder here.”
“You’re growing up. Everything is harder no matter where you live,” Mom said.
“So can I miss school today?” I asked again.
“You agreed to be part of their dance group. Isn’t the dance now choreographed for six people?” she pointed out.
“Yeah, but they can change it back. They don’t need me.” I played with the zipper of my duffel. “She might never want to be my friend again, you know.”
Mom nodded. “That’s a possibility. You won’t know if you hide from her. A friendship is built on trust. You need to give her a reason to trust you.”
I groaned and continued to pull the zipper open and closed.
“Today’s talent show isn’t only about Roseann,” she reminded me. “All those other girls are waiting on you too.”
I thought of Miranda. She needed me alongside her to keep up. Plus, she smiled at my jokes. Sometimes.
“How’s this? You go be fabulous in that talent show. I’ll have Alex pick you up after school and drive you to the airport for a quick trip to see your dad. And Eden,” she said knowingly.
“I can go back home?”
“This is home, Molly. Here. With me. But, yes, you can go to Arizona for the weekend. After school.”
Mom’s mind had been made up. I could live with that.
“That’s great!” I wrapped her in a hug. “What about Andre?” I’d told her how Andre’s gym made me feel so alone and bad at gymnastics.
“Let me call him this afternoon. I’ll sort out the money part somehow.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Mistakes happen.” She kissed my forehead. “I’ll also drop the red silk shirt at the dry cleaners. But when you get back, you and Alex are replanting the grass seed—and doing a whole lot more yard work.”
“I kind of figured that.” I grimaced. “Hey, how about I plant it now instead of going to school?”
“Good try, but no.”
“I figured that too.”
“Listen, sweetie, if things don’t work with Roseann, there are other girls in your school, you know,” Mom said.
“I know, but I’m going to handle this.” I stood.
“I’m proud of you.” She stood too. “Be ready in ten minutes?”
“Do you have dark red lipstick I can borrow?” I asked, rummaging in my drawer for a black tank.
“Dark red? Wow!” She seemed surprised. “Isn’t that a bit much
?”
“You said I should—”
“No, dark red is fine.” She stepped into the hall, then turned. “I have this strong feeling that everything is going to turn around, and you’ll have so much fun today.”
“I hope so.” I thought about the apologies I needed to make—to Kate, to Mrs. Murphy, and to Roseann again. Not my definition of fun.
“Bring your bag. I’ll call your dad and talk with Alex. Meet you downstairs.” She headed off.
“Hey, Mom! I might need more than ten minutes.” I shook out my long curls. “I have to blow my mane straight.”
“Now?” she cried. “Why?”
“There’s a photo,” I explained. “If I’m going, Roseann says I’ve got to look good!”
CHAPTER 15
“Is my lipstick crooked?” Miranda gave me a lopsided grin.
“Not at all.” I glanced around backstage. All the kids in the talent show had gathered to get ready. A girl tuned her cello. A girl in a tutu laced her pointe shoes. A boy juggled fruit. The green apple kept falling and rolling. Our group, in all black with the pop of bright color on our lips, looked the most grown-up and sleek.
First period had been cancelled. Through the thick velvet curtains I heard muffled voices, as the rest of the sixth graders filed into the auditorium. Backstage buzzed with nerves and excitement.
“Onyx? Is that your name?” Ms. Fairley adjusted her glasses and checked her clipboard.
“Yep, that’s us,” Grace said proudly. “Do you get it? Onyx is a gemstone that’s black.”
“And you’re wearing all black,” Ms. Fairley said. “I got it. All group members here?”
“All here,” Grace agreed.
I glanced at Roseann. She didn’t look away, but she didn’t smile either. She’d been nice enough since I’d arrived, just not overly so. She obviously hadn’t told the others what had happened. If she had, I was sure Grace would’ve said something.
I couldn’t figure out why she kept it a secret. I’d assumed she’d texted them as soon as Alex had dropped her and Chrissy home.
“Your group is up next for your photo.” Ms. Fairley pointed to a bearded man with a camera and tall lights in a far corner. “After the photo, it’s your turn to perform. We need to stay on schedule.”