by Carian Cole
Me: I'm positive
Talon: I miss you too. Text me when you get home, beautiful
"Are you guys texting? I've never seen you smile like that. And you're blushing!" Kat exclaims. "You guys are adorable."
"He's even sweet and sexy in his texts."
She shakes her head from side to side and lets out a little whistle. "You two got it bad. I love it."
I love it, too.
27
TALON
TONIGHT’S SHOW kicked ass and was our biggest turnout to date, completely sold out. We played tighter than we have in a long time, and the fans went wild over the new material. It was fucking awesome to see all my hard work being appreciated, even though the guys made some changes I didn't exactly love.
We're staying at a hotel tonight and hitting the road again tomorrow afternoon, so I ditch the party after the concert and have one of the roadies drive me over to the hotel. I've been in the band since I was eighteen years old, and this is the first time I've said fuck it to the party, the drugs, the alcohol, and the women.
Why? Because I can't wait to get to my hotel room to be alone and call Asia.
My brain is fucked, my heart is aching, and my dick is pissed off for going cold turkey.
I undress quickly but carefully, actually folding my stage clothes—because she made them. Her hands sewed all these patches, dyed the fabric, put it all together. For me. That still blows my frigging mind.
Before flopping on the bed, I grab a soda from the fridge and hit Asia's number on the main screen of my cell phone.
"Hi!" she answers happily in her little elfin voice, instantly melting me.
"Hey, baby."
"How was it tonight?"
"It was fuckin' epic. No fuckups, everything was perfect, and the fans loved the new songs."
"Of course they did. You wrote them, right?"
"Mostly."
"Then they can only be amazing. Tomorrow night is the one I can watch live, right?"
"Yup. And then the next live one is on Halloween night."
"And then you come home? After Halloween?"
The cold soda feels good on my throat that's dry and raw from singing backup mixed with breathing theatrical fog on stage. It’s only going to be worse for the Halloween show. My throat will be wrecked by then.
"Yup. Then I come home."
"And then there's another short tour, you said?"
"Yeah, I think it’s the first week of January."
"Okay." Apprehension plagues her voice.
"It's a short one. A little over a week." I'm not sure if I'm trying to assure her or myself that a week of not seeing each other again won't be so bad.
"Okay, I don't want to think about it right now."
"Me neither. I fucking miss you."
"Talon, I loved finding the note and the gifts. That was incredibly sweet."
"That's me. Sweet."
"You can be."
"Don't tell anyone, or I'll have to spank you."
Her giggle radiates from the phone. "I might like that."
I groan, adjusting my cock which has jumped to attention. I'll never get the image of spanking her sweet ass out of my head now. "Baby, don't get me going when I can't touch you."
"You got me going first."
It drives me wild knowing she wants me, but I can't stand wanting her and not being able to have her, so I change the subject to try to calm my lower region down. "How was Kat and the spa?"
"It was good. She asked me if the rumors were true."
"Which rumors?"
"About your eleven inches."
I choke on my e-cig vapor. "Are you fucking kidding me?"
"I wish I were."
"Jesus. I hope you confirmed it."
"I told her the rumors were false and it's actually fifteen inches."
Cracking up, I turn off the light and prop some pillows up behind my head. "I'm sure it feels like fifteen for you, little one."
"For real. Other than asking about the size of your man parts, she kinda told me that Dr. H thinks out of all the couples, we're the most devoted to each other and taking our marriage the most seriously."
"Really? Go us."
"That's what she said. She's not supposed to talk to us about it, but she was telling me the other couples are having a ton of problems."
"That sucks. I think we're doing okay now."
"I do, too."
I take a drag on my e-cig. "Are you happy?"
My nerves fire up when she doesn't answer right away. "Aze?"
"I'm thinking, Tal."
"You have to think about this answer? That doesn't sound good."
"No…I was just thinking of the right words."
"Yes is one word, and it sounds right…"
"I wanted to say more."
"More like yes, or more like no?"
"More like yes."
"Okay. What are they?"
She sighs and does a little growl that's kind of sexy. "You ruined it now. So it's just yes."
Fuck. I want to know what she was going to say. "Tell me."
"Tell you what?"
"I want to know what you were gonna say. You can't do that shit to me, baby."
"I'll text it to you."
Text me? "What the fuck, you can't talk to me?"
"You make me sorta nervous."
Shit, if this conversation morphs into a step back, it's going to wreck my good mood. "Nervous how? You can tell me anything. Lay it on me."
"I'm happier than I've ever been. You give me butterflies all the time, and I want you to feel that way, too." She pauses. "Do guys get butterflies? Or is that just a female thing?"
Butterflies. I'm way beyond fucking butterflies with her. I feel like I've got pterodactyls taking up residence inside me.
Laughing a little, I answer her honestly. "Yeah, we get butterflies. But only when the chick is adorable and hot as hell. Like you. So stay happy, okay?"
"Do I make you happy, though? I don't mean just sex, I mean, like, everything?"
"Yes. Everything. You've redefined happy for me."
I'm met with a deafening silence.
"Asia? You fall asleep over there?"
"No, silly. Sometimes you just make me so happy that I can't even think or talk."
"Great. I make you brain-dead," I joke. "Just what I always wanted to do."
Her laughter makes me want to hug her, pull her clothes off, and kiss all her ticklish places. The king-size bed I'm in is taunting me with its huge space and lack of my naked wife.
"I should go," she finally says. "I have a lot of soap and lotion orders to fill tomorrow. Are you going to sleep now?"
"Yup, I'm in bed already."
"Call me or text me tomorrow?"
"I will, babe. Remember to set the alarm. I miss ya."
Two seconds after I end the call, there's a knock on my hotel door. Shit. I hope it's not one of the horny groupies that follow me from show to show. I climb out of the bed and cross the room to peer through the peephole in the door, and I'm surprised to see Storm standing there.
I swing the door open and look at him questioningly. "What's up?"
He pushes past me and stalks around the room, even checking the bathroom, before his eyes land on me. "You alone?" he asks.
"Fuck yeah, I'm alone. I was just gonna watch a movie and fall asleep."
He nods and grins. "Good. I wanted to make sure you weren't fucking up or wasted."
I wave my hand at him and sit on the bed again. "Dude, I'm good. I'm not gonna fuck up. I just talked to her; everything is awesome. I'm not going to screw this up."
He throws himself on the bed next to me and rolls over onto his back, staring up at the ceiling. "I miss Evie. I just talked to her, too."
"I miss Asia, too. More than I thought. It's kinda fucked up."
"Yeah, it is. We used to play and party and get laid. Now we play and sit on the phone and wonder if they're missing us."
"That pretty much sums i
t up." I lean back on my pile of pillows and reach for the remote.
"It's worth it, though. Drinking and fucking got boring after a while, ya know?"
I nod and choose a horror movie from the movie guide. "Yeah, I do know."
He kicks off his boots and makes himself comfortable on the other side of the bed while I stare at him. "What are you doing?"
Taking the remote out of my hand, he turns the volume up a little and shrugs. "I'm gonna stay here and watch this movie with you. We haven't done this in years. Remember you used to hang out in my room when we were younger, and we'd stay up all night watching Headbangers Ball?"
"Fuck. I loved doing that. As far as big brothers go, you were pretty cool."
He kicks my leg. "Were? I totally mentored your coolness. And I'm even cooler now, man."
I shake my head and laugh at him. "Whatever. If you're staying, you gotta be quiet. And stay on your side."
He leans his head against mine and snaps a quick picture of us with his phone. "I'm gonna text this to our girls and tell them we're having a sleepover. They'll fuckin' love it."
I roll my eyes and shove his shoulder off me, but he's right. Asia will love getting a picture of Storm and me, and she'll probably sleep better knowing Storm is shacked up in my room.
Sure enough, a few minutes later my phone is buzzing.
Asia: omg is Storm really staying with you? LOL
Me: Yup. He's trying to relive our childhood I think
Asia: Awww :-) you guys are so cute
Me: We're gonna watch a movie and crash. Get some sleep, baby
Asia: Nitey nite <3
28
ASIA
THIS NOTE WAS STASHED in my craft room, with my soap-making supplies. When did he go around hiding all these notes? I want to ransack the house to see if there are more, but finding them at random times when I least expect it is too sweet to wreck. So I channel what little self-control I have and prohibit myself from going on a note-hunting spree.
I spend the next few hours making soaps of all different scents and shapes, the cupcakes making me smile remembering how Talon tried to eat one. I also make a few batches of lotions and lip balm, putting one of those aside for myself since he loves it so much.
While I eat dinner, I check my social media pages and email, and I see that Talon has tagged me in a status update.
I really miss my girl @asia_valentine and my little rug rat @princess_pixie
#Love #mywife #catsofinstagram #family
I don't read the replies to his statuses anymore because, although most are supportive, there are always a few that are nasty. And of course, those are the ones I tend to focus on the most, so I took Evie's advice to not read them and only read what Talon has typed. And I've read what he's typed about twenty times, my heart bursting in my chest when I zero in on one word I somehow didn't notice at first.
#Love
Does that mean he loves me?!
I send him a text.
Me: Love your status. Can't wait to watch you live online tonight! We miss you. Xo
A LITTLE BEFORE eight p.m., I take Pixie and my laptop up into bed with me and use the log-in information to access the website that is going to stream the live concert.
"We're gonna watch Daddy," I say as Pixie curls herself up against my side, facing the laptop. A band called Ever Lust plays first, and I'm surprised to see Finn playing lead guitar. I don't remember Talon telling me that Finn's band opened for them, and I wonder if this could be part of what causes some of the animosity between them.
The stage goes dark for a few minutes, and then red and white lights shine from above as fog drifts up slowly and floats across the stage. Dim lights glow from the floor, lighting up headstones scattered around the stage.
The guys are all standing on stage, not moving, as eerie screams and door-slamming blast from the speakers.
One by one, a spotlight shines down on each of them and they start to play. Their Halloween makeup is spot-on. Talon's face, arms, and chest are painted like a skeleton, all white and black, and his face makeup is seriously creepy. But also incredibly hot in a sick way. I don't even mind that he's not wearing a shirt for this because he looks incredibly spooky and sexy. He's got an old, tattered top hat on his head, his hair flowing out from under it, and I kind of want him to wear it while we have sex because something about it is turning me on in a bad way.
I grab my phone and send him a text so he can see it later.
Me: Holy shit, you guys look amazing! The makeup is wild! And that hat? Bring that home. Me likey. Xo
The other guys look equally awesome. Asher has tiger makeup, Storm and Mikah are both made up like zombies, and Vandal has what looks like deep gashes and blood with a hatchet sticking out of the side of his head. It must have taken the makeup artist hours to do all this, which is probably why I haven't heard from Talon yet today. He must have been preoccupied with the stage setup and getting all that makeup painted on.
This live show is much different than the one I went to in Boston, which was smaller, with way fewer people. The arena they're playing in right now is huge, and the audience is packed. The stage is also about triple the size, and there are girls wearing sexy black cat costumes dancing around on the stage. I'm not sure if the girls are always on stage with them or if they’re just extras for this Halloween theme, but I try not to have a jealous fit when one of them starts shaking her long, fake fuzzy tail right next to Talon and bends over in front of him. I mean, what the hell? Dressing up as a cat shouldn’t induce whorism. I watch Talon as he grins and goes into an amazing guitar solo, and she pounces away, and thankfully, he doesn't watch her ass sashay to the other side of the stage.
Even though I don't know all of the band's songs, I can pick out all the newer songs in the set because they have a slightly different sound. They're less metal and more rock mixed with blues and sort of a seventies-ish tone in some, and all the lyrics are catchy. I'm not quite sure what it would be categorized as, but it's unique and cool and I love it. Talon worked his butt off to write these songs, and I'm so proud of him and how talented he is.
I watch the entire concert, torn between loving the music and getting way too turned on watching my husband strut around like a sexy skeleton. I wonder if I should be a little bit concerned that the strangest things about Talon excite me. Things I never would have thought would make my heart speed up, like his hair, his ink, him wearing guyliner, stomping around on a cemetery stage wearing a hat. A few months ago, I never would’ve been attracted to any of that, but now…I can't get enough of it. Or him.
After the concert, I log off and put the laptop on my nightstand, write in my journal, and send Talon a text.
Me: The concert was awesome! I loved it! Love the new songs, too. And that hat… Don't forget to bring that home. ;-) Call me when you can, I miss you.
It's near midnight, so I brush my teeth, put on some lotion and get cozy in bed, still sleeping in Tal's shirt. I check my phone, but I have no text or call from him, which is strange because he likes to call every night to say good night before we go to sleep. I can't remember if he's staying at the hotel again tonight or if they’re getting back on the tour bus, but I would assume if they’re going back on the road tonight then he would be busy and may not have time to call. Or text. Even though that would only take about four seconds to do.
I WAKE up the next morning with my phone on my chest—still devoid of any contact from Talon. Frowning, I type up a quick message to him.
Me: Just want to make sure you're ok? Text me when you can. Xo
I'm not going to freak out. This is his job, and like any other job, sometimes he might be too busy to text or call. Even for an entire day and night. But I'm not going to worry or let myself get crazy. Because we're past that.
Coffee is calling my name, so I get dressed and go to the kitchen to make a cup, feed Pixie, then dress her in one of her new outfits, and take her picture for her blog. While I'm on the laptop in the craft room,
I check the band's social media page and my heart drops to my feet when I see pictures of Talon with one of the cat girls and another beautiful, dark-haired girl. Scanning through all the photos of last night's show, I see some of Mikah with the cat girl too, but Talon is the only one with the other girl, and he's got his arm around her.
I can't stop staring at the picture, analyzing every pixel, looking for hidden clues. His hand isn't touching her ass or her breasts; it's right on her waist. That's good.
He's smiling, but it's not his I want to fuck you smile that I know so well now.
Ugh. I hate being like this. This isn't me.
I slam the laptop lid down. I am not going to do this. It hasn't even been a week yet—I can't have a meltdown just a few days into our first time apart. I have to trust him.
That girl is gorgeous and exotic looking, though. Tall, dark skin, perky boobs, almond-shaped eyes, the blackest of silky hair. Hell, even I'm attracted to her.
No. I'm not going to let my brain go there. He told me he only wants me now and even rammed it into me up against a household appliance to drive his point home. I have to believe him. And I can't forget the #Love hashtag! That must mean something.
I BATHE Pixie in a new shampoo that a holistic pet care company sent for us to review, and once she's rinsed and blown-dry, she actually does feel extra soft and even looks whiter, with a hint of coconut scent lingering on her fur. I place her on a tiny black leather chair that Talon bought for her at a children's store for a few photos and type up a quick, positive review to post on her blog. Since I'm back on the laptop, I check Talon's page and the band's page again, but I don't see anything new. I wish the girl in the photo with Talon had been tagged so I could stalk her. I'm not even sure who updates the band page, now that I'm thinking about it.
Evie!
I vaguely recall Talon mentioning that not only does Evie work directly for his mom, but she also does a lot of the marketing and social media updates for the band. So, if she posted this picture, then she must know who this chick is. Flipping my phone around in my hand, I debate whether I should call her and nonchalantly try to get some info about where the guys are and who that girl is. She did say I could call her anytime, so…