by Collen Houck
and then there would be no heir to the throne. So, while Ren was away, I was stuck at home training with
Kadam, learning about military strategy and working with the soldiers.
“One day, as I was returning home from weapons practice, I decided to take a detour through the gardens. There she was, standing near a fountain that she had just plucked a lotus blossom from. Her scarf hung down around her shoulders. I asked her who she was, and she quickly turned around and covered her glorious hair and face, then swung her eyes to the ground.”
I asked, “Is that when you realized who she was?”
“No. She curtsied, told me her name, and then ran off to the palace. I assumed that she was a visiting dignitary’s daughter. When I returned to the palace, I immediately began asking about her and quickly found out that arrangements had been made for her to marry mybrother ! I was insanely jealous. I was the second in everything. Dhiren was given all the things I wanted in life. He was the favorite son, the better politician, destined to be king, and now he would marry the girl I wanted.”
He spat out, “He’d never even met her. I didn’t even know that my parents wereseeking a bride for Dhiren! He was only twenty-one, and I was twenty. I asked father if he could alter the arrangement so thatI could be her betrothed instead. I reasoned that another princess could be found for Ren. I even offered to seek a bride for him myself.”
“What did your father say?”
“He was totally focused on the war at that time. I told him that Ren wouldn’t care either way, but father wouldn’t even listen to my pleas. He insisted that the arrangements with Yesubai’s father were irrevocable. He said that Yesubai’s father insisted that she marry the heir to the throne so that she could become the next queen.”
He stretched out his arms along the log we were seated against and continued, “She left a few days later and was taken by caravan to meet Ren, to sign documents, and go through the ceremony of betrothal.
She stayed there with him for just a few hours, but the trip took a week. It was the longest week of my life. Then she returned to the palace to wait…forhim .”
His golden eyes pierced mine. “Three months, threemonths she stayed in our palace waiting, and I tried to avoid her as best I could, but she was lonely and wanted company. She wanted someone to walk the grounds with her, and I reluctantly agreed, thinking I could keep my feelings in check.”
He confessed, “I told myself that she would be my sister soon and that it was okay to like her, but the more I got to know her, the more deeply I fell for her and the more resentful I became. One evening, as we were wandering the gardens, she admitted to me that she wished I were her betrothed.
“I was exultant, immediately reached for her hand, and tried to embrace her, but she put me off. She was very strict about following protocol. She even had a chaperone follow us on our walks at discreet distances. She implored me to wait and said we would figure out a way to be together. I was insanely happy and determined that I would do everything,anything , necessary to make her mine.”
I reached over and held his hand. He squeezed it and then went on, “She said that she had tried to put her feelings for me aside for the good of the family, for the good of thekingdom , but that she couldn’t help but to love me.Me .Not Ren . For the first time in my life, I got something first. We were both very young and in love for the first time. When the date approached for Ren’s return, she became desperate and insisted that I speak with her father. This was entirely improper, of course, but I was lovesick and agreed, determined to do anything to make her happy.”
“What did her father say?”
“Her father agreed to give me her hand in marriageif I conceded to certain…conditions.”
I interjected, “That’s when you arranged to have Ren captured, right?”
He winced, “Yes. In my mind, Dhiren was a hurdle I had to jump over in order to have Yesubai. I endangered him so that I could have her. In my defense, I was told that the soldiers were going toescort him to her father’s palace and that we would make different arrangements regarding the betrothal.
Obviously, things didn’t go as planned.”
I entreated, “What happened to Yesubai?”
He said softly, “An accident. She was struck and she fell. Her neck was broken. I held her as she died.”
I squeezed his hand, “I’m so sorry, Kishan.”
Though I wasn’t sure I wanted to know, I decided to inquire anyway. “Kishan, I once asked Mr.
Kadam if Ren loved Yesubai. He never really gave me a straight answer.”
Kishan laughed bitterly. “Dhiren loved theidea of her. She was beautiful, desirable, and would make a wonderful companion and queen, but he didn’t really know her. In letters he wrote, he insisted on calling her Bai and wanted her to call him Ren. She hated that. That level of informality was beneath her. She felt
that only lower castes of people used nicknames. In all honesty, they didn’t really even know one another.”
At first, I felt relieved, but then I remembered Kishan’s description of Yesubai. Not knowing a girl didn’t
mean she wasn’t desired or sought after. Ren could easily still be harboring feelings for his lost fiancée.
A slight tremor shot through Kishan’s arm. “It’s time for you to change. Thanks for staying with me, Kishan. I have so many more questions. I wish you could talk with me longer.”
“I’ll stay here with you until Dhiren returns. Perhaps we can converse again tomorrow.”
“I would like that.”
He changed into the black tiger and found a nice spot for a nap. I decided to write in my journal for a while.
I felt awful about Yesubai’s death. I turned to a blank page, but ended up drawing a picture of two tigers with a beautiful, long-haired girl in the middle. Sketching a line leading from the girl to each tiger, I
sighed. It was hard to sort out your feelings on paper if you hadn’t really sorted them out in your head yet.
Ren didn’t return the rest of the day, and Kishan napped all afternoon. I walked past him noisily several times, but he kept on sleeping.
I muttered, “So much for my big protector. I could walk off into the jungle and he’d never know it.”
The big black tiger huffed slightly, probably trying to tell me that he knew what was going on, even if he
was napping.
I ended up reading quietly the rest of the afternoon, missing Ren. Even when he was a tiger, I felt like he
always listened to me and that he would talk with me if he could.
After dinner, I patted Kishan on the head and retreated to my tent to get some sleep. As I cushioned my head on my arms, I couldn’t help but notice the big empty hole next to me where Ren always slept.
The next four days continued in the same pattern. Kishan stayed nearby, left on patrol a couple of times a day, and then returned to sit by me during lunch. After lunch, he changed to a man and allowed me to pester him with questions about palace life and the culture of his people.
On the morning of the fifth day, the routine changed. Kishan changed to a man right after I emerged from
the tent.
“Kelsey, I’m worried about Dhiren. He’s been gone a long time, and I haven’t caught his scent on patrol. I suspect that he’s had no luck on his hunt. He hasn’t hunted for himself since he was captured, which I’m guessing was about two hundred and fifty years ago.”
“Do you think he’s hurt?”
“It’s a possibility, but keep in mind that we heal quickly. There aren’t many beasts here that would try to
injure a tiger, but there are poachers and traps that need to be watched for. My plan is to go find him and discover what’s keeping him from returning.”
“Do you think it’ll be easy to find him?”
“If he’s smart, he would have stuck to the river. Most of the herds congregate near the water. Speaking of food, I noticed you were getting low. Last night while you were sl
eeping, I met Mr. Kadam at his camp near the road and brought back more of those meal packages.” He indicated a bag left by the tent.
“You must have carried that in your mouth the entire way. Thank you.”
He grinned. “You are entirely welcome, my lovely.”
I laughed. “Better to carry a backpack in your teeth over several miles than to have Ren sink his into your hide for letting me starve, eh?”
He frowned. “I did it for you, Kelsey. Nothim .”
I put my hand on his arm. “Well, thank you.”
He pressed his hand on top of mine. “Aap ke liye. For your sake, anything.”
“Did you tell Mr. Kadam that we would be a bit longer?”
“Yes, I explained the situation to him. Don’t worry about him. He’s comfortably camped near the road and will wait as long as necessary. Now, I want you to pack up some water bottles and food. I’m taking you with me. I would leave you here, but Ren insists that you get into trouble if left alone.” He touched my nose. “Is that true, bilauta? I can’t imagine an endearing young woman such as you getting into trouble.”
“I don’t get into trouble…trouble finds me.”
He laughed. “That much is obvious.”
“Despite what you tigers think, I can take care of myself, you know.”
He squeezed my arm. “Perhaps the tigersenjoy taking care of you.”
He changed to a tiger and waited patiently for me to get ready and pack, then led me on a trail that angled up toward the top of the falls. He let me rest for a while at the top. I took in the view of the jungle and made out our little camp below in the small clearing.
We continued to follow the river until we arrived at a large tree trunk that had fallen across. It was stripped bare of branches, and the rushing water had peeled off the bark, leaving the trunk smooth and dangerous. The water was rushing, and every once in a while it splashed over the top of the makeshift bridge. Kishan leapt up on the trunk and padded across. The tree bobbed up and down under his weight, but it seemed stable enough. He landed softly on the other side and then turned to watch me cross. Somehow, I mustered the courage.
I yelled across nervously, “Kishan! Did you ever think that crossing this log just might be a little bit easier
for a tiger with claws than for a girl with a heavy backpack wearing sneakers? If I fall in, I hope you’re ready for a swim!” I’d traded my shoes out for the hiking boots when we arrived in camp and forgot to put the hiking boots back on. The new boots had left my heels blistered, and I’d been trying to give my feet a chance to recover. The boots were nice, but I still needed to break them in.
I made it across and breathed a deep sigh of relief. We continued walking, and after about three miles, Kishan finally caught Ren’s scent, which we followed for another two hours. He let me get a good rest while he took off to scout out Ren’s location. He returned a half an hour later with his report.
“There’s a large herd of black antelope in the clearing about a half mile away. Ren has been stalking them for three days without catching any of them. They’re extremely fast, and usually a tiger would go for
a baby or an injured animal, but there aren’t any right now, so he has to catch a healthy adult.
“They’re edgy and jumpy because they know Dhiren is stalking them. They’re sticking close together, which makes it hard for him to separate one from the herd. He’s also been hunting for several days, so he’s very tired. I’m going to lead you to a safe place downwind where you can stay and rest, while I help Ren with the hunt.”
I agreed and shouldered my pack again. He led me through the trees and started climbing a large hill, stopping to sniff the wind several times along the way. After we’d climbed several hundred feet, he found
a place that suited him. Seeing that I was settled, he took off.
I drank down a bottle of water and started to get restless. I decided to hike around just a bit to get my bearings and explore the area. I carefully noted rock formations and used my compass to make sure I knew where I was.
I hiked farther up the hill and spied a large rock jutting out over the tree line. The rock was flat on top and shaded by a large tree. I climbed up to it and was amazed when I looked out at the view. I scrambled up higher, crossed my legs, and sat down. The river meandered lazily below, weaving back and forth at a sluggish pace a few hundred feet below me. I sat back against a tree trunk and enjoyed the breeze.
About twenty minutes later, something moving down below caught my attention. A large animal emerged
from the trees. Several more of the creatures followed. At first, I thought they were deer, but then I realized they were probably some of the antelopes that Kishan had been talking about. I wondered if they were from the same herd that Ren and Kishan were following. The tops of their bodies were sable colored while the bottom half was white. They had white chins and white rings circling their big brown eyes.
The bucks sported two long, twisted horns that stuck straight out from the top of their heads like television antennas. The larger males’ horns were bigger and more tightly twisted than the smaller males.
More of the animals appeared, and I saw that some of the animals had lighter hides ranging from light tan
to dark brown.
They drank from the river, flicking their white tails back and forth. The bigger males kept watch while the
others drank. I would guess the females were about five feet tall and the males, if you included their horn
height, would be about eight or nine feet.
The longer I looked at the horns, the more nervous I felt for Ren.No wonder he’s had a hard time catching one of them.
The herd seemed to relax, and some of the animals even started grazing. I scanned the trees for Ren, but I couldn’t see him anywhere. I watched the herd for a long time. The animals were beautiful, but eventually I grew tired of scanning the trees, especially now that the sun was lower and I was staring almost directly into it. That’s the moment when I realized that the sun was in the antelopes’ eyes too.
The attack came quickly. The herd stampeded. Kishan was a black streak racing across the landscape.
He singled out a large male, who ran quickly in a different direction from the herd, which I figured was either his fatal mistake or an act of great bravery to lead the predator away from the group.
Kishan chased him toward a copse of trees, leapt up on the antelope’s back, dug his front claws into the sides of the animal, and nipped at its backbone. Just then, Ren shot out from the trees, came up alongside
the animal, and bit its front leg. Somehow, the antelope twisted out from under Kishan, who fell off. The tiger started circling around, looking for another opportunity to leap.
The antelope turned toward Ren and kept its long horns pointed at him. Ren started pacing back and forth, but the animal remained focused, always turning its head to keep its horns pointed toward the white
tiger. Its ears twitched back and forth, listening for Kishan, who had moved around behind.
Kishan leapt up and sunk his claws into the animal’s haunches, twisting so that it fell down. Ren saw an opportunity and leapt in to bite at the neck. The antelope kept writhing and twisting, trying to get up, but the tigers kept pulling it back down. Several times, in fact, I thought the animal might escape. The antelope thrashed about, got up, and darted away a few paces. Panting, it watched the tigers slowly rise and approach. I imagined its eyes rolling back and forth, wild with fear. It quivered with exhaustion and limped lamely as it waited for the next attack. The tigers slowly tackled it to the ground again.
I thought the whole process would be quick, but it seemed to take a long time, much longer than I’d expected. It was almost like they were tiring out the beast first, engaging in a macabre dance of death.
The tigers were moving wearily too. It seemed they saved their energy for the chase, burning up all their strength on that, then the kill itself ended up being an almost sluggish process.
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The antelope struggled valiantly. It kicked out several times and caught both tigers with its hooves. The tigers clamped on with their jaws and held until the animal finally stopped moving. Ren and Kishan finally
let go and rested there for a minute. Both tigers were panting from the exertion. Kishan started eating first. I didn’t want to watch, but it was unspeakably fascinating.
Kishan sunk his teeth deeply into the antelope and set his claws on the body to brace it, then, by just using the force of his jaw, he ripped off a dripping chunk of steaming flesh and started gulping it down.
Ren followed suit. It was grisly, nauseating, and disturbing. It shot shivers down my spine and goose flesh
down my arm, but I just couldn’t tear my eyes away.
After feeding like this for a while, they started to move slowly as if drugged or sleepy.Maybe it’s like eating a Thanksgiving turkey. They sat near their meal, occasionally going back to lick at the juiciest parts. A black cloud descended and I figured they must be giant black flies if I could see them from where I was. They’d somehow signaled to each other that a great meal was being served. There must be hundreds of them in that swarm, all buzzing around the fresh kill.
As the black cloud of insects surrounded them, I imagined the flies landing on the unseeing eyes of the dead animal and on Kishan and Ren’s bloody faces, bloating themselves on the carcass of the poor antelope. That’s when I lost it and couldn’t watch any longer. It was not that I didn’t like meat myself; my
favorite meal was French fries, a cheeseburger, and a chocolate malt, but if I had to tear the hamburger raw from the cow myself, I would quickly become a vegetarian.
I picked up my backpack and slid down the rough hill, covering the distance in just a few moments.
Since I had my compass, flashlight, and backpack, I decided to head back to camp on my own. It was a three-hour walk back along the river, so I wasn’t worried about getting lost. Plus, I wasn’t sure I could face either Kishan or Ren right after watching them gorge on raw flesh.
With almost three hours of sunlight left, I set off at a brisk pace, made it back to the log, and crossed the river before the sun had set. I moved sluggishly for the last few miles because it was getting dark and rain