by J. B. McGee
“I told you he is so into you, Gabby. So, are you going to see him again?”
“I know. I feel better about things to some extent but I’m not sure I can just dive back into a relationship. He understood, though. He said that we can start as friends, exclusive friends.” Gabby giggled remembering the brief moment on the beach where they had discussed other people and how much he had been able to lighten the mood in just a statement.
“Exclusive friends?” Sam’s eyebrows furrowed and she smiled a sideways smile. “Explain, please.”
“Well, you know, I don’t trust him because I don’t trust anyone. He knew that there was no way in the world that I would ever trust him if I thought he was dating other people. And what would be the point of even trying if he was going to see other people?”
Gabby took a breath shaking her head. She cut Sam off as she tried to respond. “I will just get hurt again. He understood. Anyway, he said he’d not been with or dated anyone since the wedding, so it wouldn’t be that big of a deal to him. Clearly I haven’t dated anyone since Ian, so it’s no big deal for me. I guess it was good to just say it and make sure it was understood, though.” Gabby stopped, “I’m rambling, aren’t I?”
“Yep, you’re rambling.” Sam giggled, winking at Gabby. “We both know what that means, too.”
“Dang it. I really tried Sam. I tried to not feel for him and I tried to push him away every way I knew how, but it didn’t work. There’s just something about him and I want more.” Gabby put her head down. “Honestly, it scares the crap out of me.”
“Gabby, there is something so special. I really think he could be the one for you. He brings out a side of you I’ve never seen and I like it. Why can’t you see that?”
“I don’t know what to think or feel Sam. All I know is that I had just gotten over Ian and felt like I was in a good place. I don’t want to lose all the progress.” She shook her head. “Besides, I think I have a lot of work still left to do on me and I’m not sure I’m emotionally available.”
“Right. That’s not all, though. Something else is bothering you.”
“The other thing that bothers me is that I’m not sure either one of us will be able to go back to just being friends. We’ve kissed, multiple times. The first time, I didn’t really kiss him back.” Her eyes lit up just thinking about the second time. “But the second time, I most definitely kissed him back and I very much enjoyed it. I don’t know what came over me. It’s just that I feel this pull towards him and I don’t know that we’ll be able to ignore that. Ya know what I mean?”
“I think you’ll figure it out. It’s probably not going to be easy. Nothing that’s worth having ever is, Gabby.”
“I know that, but —”
Sam interrupted her, “But, you can’t run away from anything that presents a risk or has the potential to require hard work. I know this and I know that if you do, you’ll never find someone. Don’t push him away out of fear.”
“That’s almost exactly what he said, Sam.” Gabby cupped her head in her hands and sighed. “Do you know that he lives in Atlanta?” She only moved her eyes, giving Sam a blank stare.
Sam leaned forward and put her arm out on the table with her palm up gesturing for Gabby to take her hand. “Gabby, I talked to him on the phone, remember? Of course, I know he’s from Atlanta. I also know that means he came a long way to find you.” She moved her head closer, “Hey,” she spoke tenderly. “Guys don’t do that if they aren’t interested in something more. He’s in this. He wants to make it work. If he wanted a one night stand, he could have that in Atlanta.”
Gabby tilted her head and placed her hand into Sam’s. “Yeah, but what if it’s just the challenge. You know? The I want what I can’t have mentality?”
Sam shook her head from side-to-side. “It might be, but that’s a lot of effort, Gabby. Give him the benefit of the doubt. I don’t know what it is about him, but I really like him. I think he could be good for you.”
“I’m trying, Sam. I really am.”
Sam stroked her hand with her thumb. “I mean, look at what he did with the whole I don’t have anything to wear situation. He didn’t let that stop him from taking you out. He just used that as yet another way to show you he cared and he wanted this to work.”
Gabby noticed how Sam’s eyes lit up as she spoke about him. Gabby raised one eyebrow and jerked her head to the side while shrugging her shoulders. “Or, it was just another challenge?” She sighed putting her head back in her hands. “He exhausts me, Sam. I’m not even with him and he’s exhausting me.” She couldn’t contain her nervous chuckle.
Sam smiled. “Well, are you going to see him again?
“Yes, today. I get to pick the date. I thought we could go to my favorite restaurant. Then, after it cools down some we could go back to the pier and just hang out around the beach, I love it there.
Sam interrupted her, “But –”
“Don’t worry. We’re not going out until later. He knows I wanted to spend some time with you today. What do you want to do?”
Gabby’s mood had turned enthusiastic as she thought about her second date with Bradley and spending the day with her sister. As scared as she was about everything, she was equally as excited about spending more time with him.
“Let’s go shopping.” Sam got up from the table and put her coffee cup in the sink. “I know we are both pretty broke, but let’s just window shop downtown.” Sam stood with her back half turned at the threshold of the kitchen and living room. “I’m going to shower. We’ll leave in about an hour, if that’s good with you?”
Gabby had unwrapped a Little Debbie cake from the basket in the center of the table. She covered her mouth as she chewed, “Yep, good for me.”
Chapter 3
January 14, 2011 ~ 12:25pm
The Present ~ Bradley
Bradley opened the door as the person on the other side was just about to knock again causing her hand to stop in mid-air right in front of his face. His mouth dropped and words escaped him as his eyes surveyed the familiar face, but the body was unfamiliar. She was indeed a very unwelcomed guest. His brows furrowed and his eyes narrowed as he cocked his head slightly to the side. “Veronica, what can I do for you?”
“May I come in?”
“Now’s really not a good time.”
“I won’t be long, may I please come in?”
Bradley stepped back and held his hand out motioning for her to come in as he shrugged his shoulders shaking his head in disapproval. All he could think about was the beautiful girl he had in the bedroom and the things he wished he was doing to her. But, he had to admit, he was slightly curious what was so important to Veronica.
Veronica was beautiful, as usual. She had perfectly straight blonde hair that was cut in a shoulder length bob, framing her face. She had bright blue almond shaped eyes that were accentuated with smoky eye shadow and long eye lashes. Her pouty lips were natural with just a small amount of shine from her gloss. She was dressed in a pale blue oversized sweater, tight black leggings and knee high boots. Despite the baggy clothing, he couldn’t ignore the fact that she was very pregnant.
Bradley pointed to her belly while also rubbing his chin. “So, when are you due?”
Stepping closer to Bradley, Veronica answered, “That’s what I need to talk to you about.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah, I have played in my head over and over again how to do this and prayed about how you would react –”
Bradley interrupted her, “I’m happy for you. I’ve moved on, I hope you’re as happy as I am.”
Veronica chewed on her lower lip and rubbed her belly sighing, “Is it serious? You know with the person you moved on with or is it your usual casual fling?”
Bradley laughed sarcastically. “No, definitely not a casual fling. It’s much more than that. Her name is Gabby, and she’s actually here.” He pointed to his bedroom. “I’d introduce you, but I somehow don’t think that’s a good idea. Ya know
, hence the not a good time.”
“Right, sorry.”
“You didn’t have to come all the way here to tell me you were pregnant. And you certainly didn’t need to worry. I really am happy for you, Roni. But, I need to be getting ready.”
“You asked when I was due. I’m actually due in March.”
“Wow, you’re carrying the baby well. I didn’t think you were that far along.”
“Thanks, I guess. Bradley…” She stepped closer filling the gap between the two of them.
A light bulb went off in his mind and his face turned white as the realization came over him. He was the reason for her visit. Shaking his head he muttered, “No, you said you were on the pill.”
“I was. They don’t always work.”
He nervously ran his fingers through his hair. “Shit, Veronica. Why are you just now telling me this?”
“I wasn’t sure I was going to tell you at all, but I just thought you should know.”
“Ya think? Damn, your timing is crap. I need you to leave. I’ll call you later. We’ll work this out, but I really need to deal with Gabby and this situation myself.” He started to walk toward the door. “I don’t need you here, especially not today of all days.”
She tilted her head while looking up to him. “Bradley, I love you. I have always loved you. I didn’t plan on this, but I am glad it happened.” She leaned in and softly kissed him on his cheek.
Gabby stood at the entrance to his bedroom door. “Bradley?”
He quickly pushed Veronica away and immediately started across the room to reassure Gabby. Veronica’s eyes narrowed as Gabby started backing away from Bradley, shaking her head.
“Gabby, it’s not what you think. I will explain can you give me a minute please. Veronica was just leaving.”
Bradley continued towards her despite her backward motion. “Gabby, look at me. It’s okay.” He walked her into the bed. “Just sit here and wait. I’ll be right back.” He leaned in and pushed her hair back behind her shoulders and kissed her on her forehead. “Wait here. Trust me, please.”
He walked back to the door and opened it motioning for Veronica to leave. “Have a good day, Veronica.”
She stopped at the door and turned back towards him and whispered, “So, that’s it? Are you going to call me or something?”
Bradley nodded his head. “Yes, that’s it. I need some time to process it all.”
A small smile came across her face and she walked away.
Bradley took a long deep breath after he closed the door. Running his hands through his hair, he exhaled and closed his eyes with his brows furrowed. When he opened them Gabby was standing in front of him.
“So.”
“It’s nothing I can’t handle. No need for you to worry about it. Let’s not let it ruin our night. Where were we?” Smiling his seductive smile he slowly started walking towards her.
“It was nothing? The part I heard didn’t sound like nothing. I thought you weren’t involved seriously with any of the other women?” She put her hands on her hips and hissed, “You know, what did you call it? The casual fling or friends with benefits? That sure seemed like more.”
“No, Gabby. You’re more than anything I’ve ever had. The feelings were…hell…are not mutual with Veronica. I can assure you of that!”
“She’s pregnant?”
“Yes.”
Gabby continued interrogating him. “When’s she due?”
“March,” Bradley whispered.
“It’s yours, isn’t it?”
“Gabby –”
“I knew it! I knew there was no way you could be happy with this situation. I knew I wouldn’t be enough for you.” Her voice grew louder and tears filled her eyes. “Were you going to wait for the baby to be born before you told me? Were you ever going to tell me?”
Bradley grabbed her shoulders and pulled her close, but Gabby fought him. “Don’t,” she hissed.
He put his hands up in surrender, taking a step back. “Gabby, I just found out five damn minutes ago. Give me a minute to process the information. I need to sort some things out for myself before I can try to sort them out for you.”
“You can have all the time you need. I gotta get out of here.” Gabby grabbed her keys fighting back tears as she ran for the door.
Bradley grabbed her arm. “Please don’t go, not like this. We have plans. You’ve driven a long way and you don’t need to be driving right now.”
She turned and looked up to him with fierce glowing hazel eyes. “Let. Me. Go.”
Bradley’s eyes were locked with hers, as if in a battle of wills. He continued to hold her until she pulled her arm. When she did, he released it, defeated. “Gabby, I want you. I love you. Please, don’t go.”
She snapped her head back. “You love me? Did you love me when you were screwing her?”
“She’s due in March, Gabby.” He threw his hands up exacerbated. “Do the math. June, it was June.”
“Thought you said you weren’t with anyone after you met me at the wedding?”
“I wasn’t.”
“So, it was what before you met me?”
“Yes.”
“I want to believe you, but I don’t know if I can. Would you have told me if I hadn’t come in and interrupted your little intimate moment?”
“Of course, but not like this. Not today.” He took a deep breath. “I have something so special and I don’t want it ruined with my baggage.”
“Well, it’s kind of late for that Bradley. Your baggage isn’t the kind that is going away or can be talked through in therapy. Your baggage is a kid for cryin’ out loud!”
“Yeah, I’m well aware of this. I didn’t know Gabby. She was on the pill.” He closed his eyes tightly before continuing. When he opened them, they were fierce with resolve. “I haven’t seen her since before the wedding. I just quit taking her calls. You have to believe me.”
“I want to, but I just…I can’t be here. I can’t be with you. I really have to go. Please, just let me go.”
“Where are you gonna go? You shouldn’t drive back tonight.” He took a step closer. “At least stay here for the night. I’ll go stay at my parents if you’ll promise to just stay and not drive back.”
Gabby shook her head and looked away. “No, I can’t be here.”
“I’ll get you a hotel room, then. Just don’t drive back tonight,” he pleaded.
“I’ll be fine. Goodbye, Bradley.” Gabby turned on her heal to leave.
He put his hand up on the door preventing her from opening it. “Hey. Why do I feel like you are telling me goodbye for good?”
Gabby narrowed her eyes and shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know.”
“Well, are you?”
“I said I don’t know. I can’t think around you right now. I need some time.”
“We’ll get through this, we have to.”
“I don’t know about that.” Gabby paused as the tears started streaming down her face. “You’re having a child with a woman who obviously loves you and you clearly felt something for her or she wouldn’t be pregnant.”
“No, I didn’t. I don’t feel anything towards her.”
“Whatever, I need to go.” Gabby swiftly walked out of the door and pressed the button for the elevator.
Leaving the door to his apartment open, Bradley followed her waiting for her to respond but she jumped in the elevator too quickly pressing the button for the doors to close. “Gabby! Wait. What do I have to do to get you to not leave tonight?”
“Nothing,” was all she said as the doors closed and Bradley stood there knowing that by the time he got down the stairs she would be gone.
She was right. There was nothing he could do to stop her from leaving. He leaned back against the wall behind him and slid down with his knees bent. Leaning his elbows up against his knees, he thumbed through his hair, sighing at how quickly his plans for that night had been thwarted.
Chapter 4
August, 2010<
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The Past ~ Gabby
Gabby couldn’t contain her excitement as her smile stretched across her face the entire time she got ready. Granted, there was no need to get dolled up, as she had only planned to take Bradley to her favorite restaurant, A.W. Shucks. She still couldn’t help but notice that she was putting in far more effort than usual to look casual. No matter what she had done all day, the kiss she had shared with Bradley was not far from the front of her mind. She kept having to remind herself that they had to walk before they ran and there was no way that they stood a chance if they didn’t take the time to get to know each other first. But, she still couldn’t push the thoughts and the warm tingling they brought to her body out of her mind for long. While she was scared, she knew that she had never felt this way before, not even about Ian. Maybe that was what scared her the most. She knew the hurt Ian had caused and the feelings were not even as intense with him as they were with Bradley.
Gabby glanced at the antique alarm clock on her old wooden dresser as the doorbell rang. Bradley had called her earlier and confirmed he would pick her up at 7pm, and even though he had said he was always late like Gabby, she had not yet experienced his tardiness. It was 7pm sharp. She grabbed her things as she smacked her lips together to spread her lip gloss.
“Gabby,” Sam hollered as Gabby hurried into the living room.
“I’m right here!” Gabby laughed and looked up to see Bradley standing in front of the door.
Sam had let him in and he was dressed casually in a white linen button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows showing his tanned muscular forearms. How could arms be so sexy, she wondered? They were dusted with black hair. His shirt was tucked into khaki pants, which were hanging perfectly from his narrow hips. Gabby took a deep breath trying to contain the blush that was surely washing over at the moment as she drank in his divine existence. How had she ever gotten so lucky that this man would be standing in her tiny house waiting on her? She briefly closed her eyes as he embraced her, softly kissing her cheek. He handed her more flowers. This time there were a dozen yellow long stemmed roses.