by Dizzy Hooper
He trails his hand away from my thigh. Up, over my hip.
He rests it on the softness of my belly, and something tender and impossible opens up inside of me.
"Yes," I whisper.
He stops cold. Hope sparks in his eyes, but there's a guardedness there, too. "Yes?"
"Yes. When my season hits, let's—we should. I want…"
A new shine appears in the corners of his eyes. "You want…"
He rubs my belly again, a choking noise clicking in his throat.
I lean up, pulling at the back of his neck to bring him down. With my lips beside his ear, I whisper, "I want you to breed me, alpha."
He groans and drops his head, mashing his face to my neck. His cock throbs inside me.
I look around. Colt and Landen stand around us. Landen's gaze is just as soft as Grady's was a moment ago, and Colt looks like he's been hit by a truck. But I speak to them.
"I want it," I repeat, louder now. "I want this pack to be a family. I want your pups." Still looking at them, I rub my hand through Grady's hair, clutching him close and tilting my hips up. "I want you to put a baby in me."
Grady loses it, then. He slams into me a half dozen more times. "Mate…"
He slides his hand away from my womb to put some pressure on my clit, and that's it. With the first pulse of his release, I shatter. My orgasm draws him in. My pussy sucks out every drop of his seed, and he gives it to me.
He gives me everything.
They all do.
And God help me. I'm going to give them this.
A baby.
Chapter 9
"It's starting. Isn't it?" Colt's voice comes out of nowhere.
I nearly jump out of my skin. I thought it was just me in the house today—Grady at a pack council meeting, and Landen and Colt off showing some tourists how to navigate the rapids heading up to Broken Ladder Falls.
I whip around, all thoughts of the javascript I was tinkering with forgotten.
Not that that's any great loss.
I've been distracted all day, my head swimming and my blood pounding through my veins. My pussy warm and my breasts tight. My womb making its emptiness known.
Because Colt's right. Of course he is.
Nearly a month has passed since the memorial ceremony and the insane, athletic, life-affirming sex our little pack indulged in afterward. Since Grady touched my belly while he made love to me, sweet and slow.
Since I promised them that we would try.
I made an appointment with my doctor the very next day. We were cutting things close, but there was still time to remove my hormonal implant and make my next cycle a productive one.
I've been in a state of nervous anticipation ever since. My doctor warned me that my season would hit even more powerfully than usual this time around, that the lead-up would be more uncomfortable and the urges more intense.
She really, really wasn't lying.
Even now, just the sound of my mate's voice has my pussy throbbing. His scent hits me and blanks my senses to everything else. I breathe it in, and my head swims. Instinct tells me to go to him and strip and present. Beg him to mount me and breed me and fill me with his pups, and that's what I'm going to do. Tomorrow, anyway.
Today, I still have some restraint.
Working to keep my wits about me, I close my laptop and stand. "I thought you were going to be gone all day."
Colt shakes his head. "Only two people showed up. Landen can handle them."
"Oh." I'm shaking, my skin crying out to be touched, my lungs aching for me to bury my nose against this strong male's throat and pull more of his thick, rich scent into my body.
Colt takes one step closer, and my knees threaten to go to water beneath me.
God, he looks good. He always looks good, of course, but he's clearly warm from working outside. His olive skin gleams with a thin coating of sweat. His thin black T-shirt clings to his muscles while his work-worn jeans hug his hips.
I swallow hard at what rests beneath the denim. The bulge in his pants is too big to be ignored, and I want it. I want that silky flesh in my hands, in my mouth, inside me and pushing deep.
Colt's dark eyes flare with heat. But he keeps his distance. It's only a few feet, but it feels like a mile.
"You feel it, don't you? What I smell?" His voice goes low and rough. "You're close."
I nod. What's the point of denying it? He can clearly tell that my season is upon me. Chances are that they've all been scenting it on the air for the last week as I've dealt with the cramps and other side effects of my womb preparing to accept their seed. They've given me space—though I have to admit that our love making has taken on a more desperate edge. Grady's dirty talk about knocking me up has grown more explicit, and Landen's been shooting me more looks of eagerness and longing. His hands have lingered more intently on my body, even through the most casual of touches.
Not Colt, though.
I hesitate. Realization is a cool gust of air on the heat slowly gathering inside me.
"Is that…okay?"
Colt chuckles, but there's a dark sort of humor behind it. "Does it matter?"
He might as well have slapped me. "Of course it does."
"Grady and Landen are dying to fuck you full of pups. That's enough."
"But how do you feel?"
He falters.
And isn't that my beautiful Colt? He's the quietest of the bunch—the dirtiest, too, but that's not the issue right now. He's a fierce protector, a strong warrior. He'd defend this pack with his life. But his own interests? I don't know.
"It's what the pack decided."
"That's not what I asked."
Now he's the one holding back and I'm the one advancing. I reach out. His flinch hurts almost physically, but I push through it to place my hand on the rough stubble of his cheek.
"What do you want, Colt?"
He searches my eyes for what feels like the longest time. I let him, even though his closeness is making my head swim, my breasts swell and my sex pulse.
Finally, he seems to find whatever he was looking for. He grasps my hand and turns it. Pressing his lips to my palm, he lets his eyelids drop for a moment. Then, inhaling deeply, he reels me in.
The bear hug he wraps me up in feels like a distraction, but also like connection. Holding me tight, he sighs.
"Things are so good right now."
Oh. "Of course they are."
"After…"
"It'll still be good."
"Sure. Probably."
"Good but different," I guess.
He shrugs helplessly, and it's the least certain I think I've ever seen him.
I squeeze my eyes shut tight. "We don't have to do this, you know?"
Each word takes force, and he feels that effort. He shakes his head, squeezing me tight.
"You're fertile, Jessica."
"Then I'll leave." Go off somewhere — into the woods or a locked cabin, kind of like I was planning to when I happened to arrive at these males' door.
"You can't."
"I would." It would nearly kill me. The pain of not spreading my legs and asking to be bred already feels overwhelming, and my season isn't even upon me.
Sitting out my season alone for all those years was torture. Doing it now, without the birth control that's moderated my heats for my entire adult life…now that I've found my mates and know the taste of their skin, the satisfaction of their thick cocks filling me up…
I don't know how I'd manage on my own. But this is important.
"Everyone needs to agree," I insist. "I don't want you just going along."
"Please. It's not as if it'll be a hardship."
And yeah—I can feel just how little hardship it'll be in the press of his erect cock to my abdomen through our clothes.
"That's not…"
"I want to breed you," he confesses. "God, I want it so much. I can't wait to have you on your knees and begging to get fucked—you don't even know. It turns me on so bad."
F
uck. Fresh wetness seeps through my panties, soaking me. Making me slick and ready to be taken by this male.
Only…
A frown curls my lips. "It's not just the breeding, though."
"I know." He loosens his grip at last. "And it'll be fine. I know that. I just don't understand what the rush is. We could enjoy this—just the four of us. We're happy, we're safe…"
And there's something about the way he says safe. I pull away so I can look him in the eyes.
"Are you afraid?"
"What? No." But his reflexive flinch gives him away.
"You are. But not of fatherhood…"
Not once has that entered into the equation, and I don't think his anxiety is buried quite that deep.
I'll admit that motherhood scares the hell out of me. It's all consuming. It's difficult and requires time. Sacrifice.
But if there's ever been an upside to this unconventional arrangement of ours—besides the joy of three strong males doting on me and attending to all of my needs—it's how well equipped we'll be to see to our pups. They say it takes a village. Well, we have the beginnings of one right here in this very house. Wrapped up in this very bond.
So that'll be all right, and Colt knows it.
And then it strikes me.
The massacre. The memorial.
That was what started this whole breeding frenzy in the first place anyway—wasn't it?
First Grady with his moodiness and his sudden interest in putting me in classic breeding position, his fetish for touching my flat belly.
Then Landen and his wistfulness to create the family that had been stolen from him when his pack was attacked.
The love we made after the memorial—the brutal, starving way they took me one after another, and once from both ends—only confirmed it. Grady asked, and I agreed, and I'm ready. I am.
But unlike the others, for Colt, the tragedy he survived doesn't seem to have inspired him to want to rebuild.
I go out on a limb, touching his face again. Looking deep into those dark and haunted eyes. "I'm going to be okay."
I've hit my mark. He shakes his head. "You don't know that."
"Modern medicine is very good. Having pups—it's not that dangerous." For shifters, it never has been. Our bodies are made to change and grow. They accommodate young better than human bodies ever could.
"But it's not without risks. And after…" He swallows hard, the sound echoing in the quiet room. "Being the mother to our brood. It makes you a target."
Oh, this man. This poor, beautiful, lost man.
"It doesn't."
"It could."
"You pack wiped those others off the map two decades ago. Anyone who tried to attack you now would be insane."
"I know." He clutches me close again, pressing his face to my hair. "I know, but I can't stop thinking about it. It happened once. What's to prevent it from happening again?"
I run my hand over his scalp, the close cropped hairs of his skull trim tickling my palm. "Time. Wisdom."
He scoffs.
"Hey. I do have three strong males to protect me."
I'm playing to his male pride, and he knows it. He chuckles wryly, but the sound is less dark than it was before. "I thought you were a feminist."
"I am, but that doesn't mean I don't rely on my mates." I pull back and take his face between my hands. "It's a risk. Of course it is. Everything is. But we'll be okay."
He searches my gaze, and his throat bobs. "I know. But I still don't like things changing."
"We'll do it together. Isn't that enough?"
After a long moment, he nods. "I'm being ridiculous."
"Just protective. Worried. Believe me, I understand."
"Thanks for talking me down."
In my head, I breathe out a sigh of relief. Everything about him is less tense now. I feel like a poor excuse for a mate. How did I not realize he was going through such turmoil?
"You're sure you're okay?"
"As okay as I'm going to be."
The heaviness is officially gone from the air. Testing, I allow a little bit of flirtiness to enter into my tone. "Anything I can do to take your mind off it?"
His gaze darkens. "I can think of a couple of things…"
Just like that, his hug becomes a hell of a lot less about comfort and a whole lot more about something else. He slides his hands down my rib cage. My breasts press into his chest, and he palms my ass through my jeans.
I lift my brows in invitation.
My season is close. My body is primed. I may not be desperate for a cock to fill me up with seed and breed me yet, but my pussy is wet, my abdomen swirling with arousal and heat.
When his lips meet mine, I let him in without hesitation.
And we don't think about loss or pups or risks again for a long, long time.
Chapter 10
I wake the next morning to the sound of someone trying to beat down my door.
My eyes snap open, and I lurch upward, only to meet with resistance. Grady's voice register's in the distance, but it's Colt's arm weighing me down. I twist around to find him awake, his gaze gone black with need, and I'd been dreaming about this. About multiple men fighting for me, scratching and clawing at each other for the right to throw me down and thrust inside. To fuck me and breed me, over and over and over.
But that's not what's about to happen. These are my mates—all of them. There will be no fighting. Just the breeding.
Just one cock after another until I'm leaking their come and full to bursting with their pups.
God, I want it.
My pussy pulses, empty, around nothing. My breasts are heavy and ripe, and Colt smells so good.
But Grady smells better, even through the door. I scent Landen, too, and my head swims. Fuck, what's happening to me? My blood is boiling, my skin too tight on my bones. My womb screams out, and I can't seem to catch my breath.
I want to roll over for it and pull my one mate on top of me. I want to let the other ones in.
My ass still aches a little from how thoroughly Colt worked it over last night, licking me out and fingering me until I couldn't stand it, then pushing inside. He fucked my ass until I came screaming around his thick cock, and then made me come again before filling me up, and I should be satisfied. I should be fine.
But I'm starving.
I'm—
Oh. Oh.
Just as realization dawns, the wood of my door finally gives. Grady punches a hole clear through the panelling. He reaches through to undo the lock—I don't even remember turning it; maybe Colt did? I don't know, and I don't have time to think about it, because the next thing I know, Grady is yanking the door practically clear off its hinges. It slams against the wall as he tears it open, and then he's standing there, muscled chest heaving, skin sweating, his amber eyes the shade of midnight.
"Mate," he growls.
My womb pulses again, and I whine with need. "Alpha."
Grady turns murderous eyes on Colt, who immediately removes his arm from around my waist. "How dare—"
"I didn't," Colt promises. "Not since last night, and even then—"
"She's mine." Grady's voice is barely human. I half expect his wolf to break through at any moment, but he keeps a tight hold on his control. "She's fertile."
Oh, God. His tone is painfully possessive. He's talking about me like I'm a thing, and maybe I am. My season hit me at some point in the night. It led me into filthy dreams of being thrown around and bred, nothing but a desperate hole, aching for cock—for these males' precious seed. I'm their bitch, now, a vessel to be filled up with their come and their pups, and yeah. Yes. I want it. So badly.
"Alpha." The word comes out plaintive, whining. I double over, clutching my middle as a spasm of need grabs me by the abdomen and squeezes.
"Mate," Grady growls again. He stalks toward the bed, pushing his sleep pants down his hips as he goes. His enormous alpha cock swings free. He whips his head around, all but gnashing his teeth at his pack mate
s. "I breed her first."
"Yes, alpha." Colt edges away, retreating to the far edge of the bed.
Landen hovers by the ruined door, clutching the frame so hard his fingers gouge into the wood. It looks like it's taking all the restraint in the body not to fight Grady for his claim, but he does it. Nodding. Watching.
And then I don't have any more time to think about him.
Grady prowls up onto the bed, pushing me down onto it. He buries his nose to my throat, and I rake my hands through his hair. Fuck, he feels good, smells good. My pussy screams to be filled, gushing more slickness onto the bed, and he groans.
My alpha kisses my mouth once, just enough for me to get a taste. Then he drops down my body, biting at my throat and my breasts and then shoving my legs apart.
I don't bother trying to hide. I spread even further for him, inviting him in. He takes one lap at my wet pussy and growls. "You waited. You didn't—"
"You're the first," I promise.
He always has been. Back when I arrived at their home, he was the first to ever claim me, the one to take my virginity, the first to sink his teeth into my neck and bond me.
And now. He'll be the first to breed me. The first to fill me up with his seed, and that's no guarantee. My season can go on for days, and I'm going to have every one of my mates before I'm done. Any one of them could be the male to actually impregnate me, but my alpha is first. Always, always first.
He licks me again, dipping a finger inside. Even that bit of pressure within sends fireworks shooting up my spine, but then he drags his other thumb through the cleft of my ass.
"Messy," he groans.
Mortification burns through me, because yeah, I would be. Colt left my asshole wet with spit and come and lube.
But he didn't touch my pussy.
"Told you," Colt rumbles from beside me.
I glance up to find him mere inches away. He's still naked from last night, his cock thick and leaking with desire. But he's earnest, too, talking to Grady about me.
"You only fucked her here?" Grady asks, pressing deeper with his thumb, just breaching my ass and making me whimper.
"Yes, alpha."
"Good boy." Grady slides the fingers of his other hand deep into my cunt. "Because this pretty pussy is mine."