“No, Alex. You are right. We should talk more. I’ve already told them I’m not to be bothered for a while, so let’s talk. I know you can’t tell me much of what you’ve been doing, and I can’t really either. But, we had things to talk about before we got our new jobs. Maybe that’s what we both need.”
Colin had always been easy-going and somewhat immature, but this new job had turned him into a responsible man, almost instantly. He was still the guy who’d taught me sign language and how to read lips and who I’d spent countless hours with, eaves-dropping on people from a distance and partying with in the bars, but he didn’t have the time for that anymore.
The long awaited conversation started out with small talk and I seriously debated about telling him about White. I really wanted to talk to him about it. I’d almost come right out and told Gabriella, why couldn’t I tell Colin? As friends went, he was my first and best friend and I should tell him. The agreement to keep it secret for now was something I wanted to honor, but I really needed to talk to someone.
“So, what’s got you so upset?” He finally asked.
“I’ve started dating a guy and he’s not called me for four days.” I pouted. Maybe I could talk to him about this and not mention names.
“Really? You haven’t had a boyfriend since Anthony. Who is it?”
“No one you know.” I hated to lie.
“If he hasn’t called, move on.” He advised.
“But, I really like this guy and he does have a good excuse for being absent. I’m just feeling left out of his life at the moment.”
“You must really like this guy,” he said.
“I do.”
He sighed loudly. “I really don’t know what to say to you. I’ve only been in love with someone once in my life and I will always be in love with her. If you’re truly in love with the guy, I imagine it’ll be the same for you, even if you don’t get to be with him.” His voice was halting and troubled.
“I’m sorry I dumped on you.”
“No. Don’t be sorry. It’s about time you talked to me about something with actual meaning. It’s been a long time coming.”
I was feeling foolish for acting like such a girl until he said this. Maybe he was right. Maybe it was time to strengthen our bonds by confiding more in each other. I told him this and thanked him for listening.
“I’m sorry I can’t give you advice on this. Actually, I could, but I won’t. You already know my thoughts on you and White in a relationship.”
“I didn’t say it was White,” I tried to sound offended.
“Who then? He’s the only one you’ve been spending all your time with. When did you find time to fall in love with anyone else?”
“It’s not White.” I lied again and this time I tried to believe my own words.
“Well, who ever this guy is, he’s lucky. Just remember, you come first and if he can’t make time for you, he doesn’t deserve you.”
“Which one did you actually fall in love with?” I remembered all of Colin’s girlfriends and wanted to know which one had stolen his heart. “Was it the hair-dresser? You know, the one who didn’t know how to cut hair? Remember? Her hair was like five inches longer on one side than the other side.”
“That was the style. Still is.”
“What was her name?”
“I can’t remember. That was right after high school.”
“How about that other one? The one who snorted when she laughed. And she laughed at everything.”
Now I was giggling. Picking on Colin about his choice of women had always been one of our favorite past times. He pretended he didn’t like it, but I never picked on a girlfriend, much, until after they had split. I’d had to deal with many a comment about Anthony and knew that would be the route the conversation would take next.
“At least this new guy is going to give me some new material. Anthony has become boring. But, remember when you tried to tell me how good he was at darts? I cleaned his clock and I’m not a very good player.”
“Yeah, Anthony’s an embarrassment.”
It continued like this for a few more minutes until we were both satisfied the other was sufficiently cheered up. Then we said our good-byes with promises to get together soon. Before he hung up the phone I quickly called his name.
“Colin?”
“Yes?”
“Thank you.”
“Any time.” With that we both said goodbye one more time and I hung up my phone. Then, I realized he’d never answered my question.
I’d managed to kill some time and I certainly felt better about my current circumstances. Colin, as always, had reminded me of who I was and I mattered to someone.
Gabriella had told me before, ‘Sometimes there’s nothing better than a good cry with a good friend.’ She usually said this after a little spat she’d had with Martin and cried to me. The first time this happened I didn’t know what to do and felt terribly uncomfortable. But now, after a good cry with Colin I better understood where she was coming from. I just hoped he didn’t think of me as a big baby now.
Maybe I should forget White and go find a nice, calm man. The problem with that was I didn’t want a nice, calm anything. That was most of White’s appeal. He was anything but tame. He was confident, experienced, dangerous and unpredictable. It was the unpredictability that worried me the most. He could change his mind about me at any second. Who knows, he could already be over me.
Something Gabriella had tried to drill into my head was to get over my romantic notions that sex was anything more than sex. Yes, it was the bringing together of two bodies, but that didn’t mean I had to release my heart and soul to the man, or men, I decided to play around with. That thought literally made me sick to my stomach. Maybe I wasn’t ready for that yet, but that didn’t mean I shouldn’t be confident enough to sleep with any man that I felt like sleeping with, even if it was just a one-night stand. Again, a shiver of nausea radiated through me. Yeah, too soon to start thinking about sleeping with the whole city. I wasn’t ready to replace White in my daydreams. There was no way I was ready to replace him in my bed.
Why am I thinking like White was just a one-night-stand? He’d never given me any indication of that. It’s only been four days, I reminded myself. I was competent and suspected that was part of what White found attractive about me. I could handle myself. So, why did I even need to worry about a man? Hell, I was probably the most dangerous woman on the face of the planet, besides my mother. If it turned out White didn’t want to continue our relationship, then so be it. It was his loss and possibly my gain.
I concluded it was best to just remember who I was and leave it at that. I could kill you… just like that. And I’d get away with it too! I openly laughed at myself.
I wouldn’t let this fake date bring me down. I’d use it to my advantage.
Chapter Seven
The remainder of the day was easier to pass and I started getting ready a little early. I pulled an emerald green, full-length gown from my closet and stepped into it. I’d bought it specifically to wear in front of White, hoping it would tempt him into a marriage proposal or something. Now he’d get to see me out on a date with another man in the dress I’d bought specifically for him.
I inspected myself in the full-length mirror, practicing those precise movements that allowed the long slits down the sides to reveal the lace on the top of my stockings for a seemingly accidental glimpse. It had been a while but the movements came back to me easily. I’d perfected them shortly after buying the dress. I could control every aspect of the gown to show what I wanted, when I wanted to.
Getting dressed was the easy part of the ritual of primping. My hair was a different story. I usually wore it in a ponytail or a braid to keep it out of the way but a date required a more provocative style. Even though this wasn’t a true date I needed to be convincing. I stood in front of the bathroom mirror for thirty minutes trying to manipulate my hair into the perfect do. Finally I decided on a messy bun at the nap
e of my neck and curled the loose hair to give it more class.
Now for the shoes, I sighed loudly. To me, the shoes are the most important part of an outfit. I knew which pair I would wear before I put on the dress, but I had to fight myself to actually put them on.
I love high heels. They make me feel sophisticated and sexy, but I was ill at ease when wearing them. Shoes had to be functional in my line of work, but for a date it was more important that they match my ensemble. I buckled them loosely in case I had to remove them quickly. I hoped nothing would come up, but it wouldn’t be the first time I had to go barefooted so I could actually move.
Going back to the full-length mirror I double-checked my special moves with my heels on. For some reason it was easier to achieve the right effect with the shoes. I admired myself in the mirror until I was satisfied. I made sure the choker I’d worn to a previous job was positioned correctly over my throat while I walked toward the elevator. It contained a microphone and GPS tracking device so my partners could hear what was going on and, if need be, find me. I hadn’t been told to wear it, but it went well with the outfit and I had learned from previous experiences it wasn’t always a bad idea to make sure I could be located. The only other item Ms. Grey had that had the GPS device was the company issued watch that would look extremely out of place with my current threads.
If I were doing this job as Penumbra I might use some sort of GPS but nothing the partners would be able to track. The need to know phrase jumped back into my head at the thought of Penumbra. Penumbra knew everything and Ms. Grey followed orders. Thoughts of what had been going on these past few days filtered back into my brain and I decided to ask White to be put on a job, any kind of job. I’d rather do a Penumbra job to feel more in control, but anything to get me out of here for a while was probably exactly what I needed.
The elevator doors opened to reveal an anxious White waiting to get on. His expression was one of irritation until the doors were fully open. Then he softened for a full second as he hesitated to get aboard. I’d become adept at judging his mood. Any show of emotions from White, other than anger or irritation, were minute and generally lost to all but the most observant.
“Well?” I cocked my head to the side, indicating the elevator.
His attitude changed back to one of annoyance.
“At least your tardiness has a reason.” I caught the flare of his nostrils and a fleeting smirk of praise before he stepped in and faced the doors.
I fought myself to keep the smile of satisfaction from my face.
I love this dress.
“Are you driving me?”
“Yep.” He didn’t elaborate.
“Where are we going?” The pleasure from White’s reaction to my dress was wearing thin and I was beginning to get irritated.
“You are going to Donatello’s.”
Finally, I was getting some answers.
“And?”
“As per your previous instructions, you’ll ask to be directed to your reserved table,” he paused and looked at me. “Table for two, under Johnson.”
A couple of seconds passed as I waited for him to continue and when he didn’t I let out an exaggerated sigh. “Do I have to drag it out of you or are you going to brief me?”
“You have been briefed.”
The elevator doors opened up to the lobby. White put one hand on them and waited for me to step out before he followed closely behind.
“Ms. Grey?” Phil, the head of security for the building, was at the lobby desk. His voice was filled with doubt.
“Yes?”
“You look very nice.” A flush crept into his face. He must not have recognized me in my date costume. It was painfully obvious I didn’t dress up enough anymore.
Mr. Black had cautioned me against flaunting my womanhood in a company full of men but I still needed to remind them once in a while I was different than them and White needed to be reminded most of all. Being a woman, I should be a mysterious creature to them. Not just their partner and another one of the guys.
When I joined the company, all I wanted was to be one of the guys but now I wanted more recognition for being a woman as well as one of them. No one seemed to notice my femininity and I vowed to take more interest in my appearance from now on.
“Thank you,” I told Phil as we exited the building into the parking garage.
White led me to his Mustang and opened the passenger door for me. For a fleeting second I thought maybe he was actually going to take me out on a secret date.
“Who is Mr. Johnson?” I pushed the subject.
“You’ll see.” I thought I sensed a hint of glee in his tone.
“Why are you driving me? I could have taken a cab.” The hope that he had this planned for us was still there.
“I wanted to make sure you’d get there on time. Besides, it’s the least I could do since I set you up on this date.”
“So, who is this Mr. Johnson again?” I tried to trick him into telling me.
“You’ll find out.”
“Well, since I’m going to find out, why not tell me now?”
“I’m sorry, Alex, but it’s better if we keep it simple.”
“Keep it simple?” I let out an unattractive grunt. “This seems to be very complicated for keeping it simple.”
White sighed. “Okay, you’re right. Johnson specifically asked for you and you’re doing me a favor by going on this date with him. It was really hard to turn him down now that we’ve started our own secret relationship. I wanted to turn him down without even talking to you but, I didn’t want anyone to get suspicious. I couldn’t give him a good reason why I wouldn’t even bring it up to you. You accepted, so you’re going.”
“I’m going to regret this, aren’t I?”
“No, it’s me that will probably regret it.”
Again, I thought I sensed amusement in his voice.
I half expected White to open my door after we pulled up to the restaurant so I hesitated for a second or two before I stepped out.
“I’ll be back to pick you up later,” he said before I shut the door.
Inside the building I did my routine scan of the people, exits and possible weapons lying about. I made sure I was satisfied before I asked about a table for two under Johnson.
The man leading me to my table couldn’t have given any thought to my high heels as he swiftly maneuvered through the restaurant with me in tow. He led me to a quiet corner table and left me to wait alone. The third time I caught myself looking at my bracelet to check the time I smacked my wrist, as if it was the bracelets fault it couldn’t tell me how long I’d been waiting. It was strange, when I was on a sniping mission, waiting was almost all I did, but somehow I didn’t even notice. However, put me in a situation like this, and five minutes felt like five days. Eventually, my companion arrived.
When he walked in the door I knew why White had been so evasive. Helix was led to my table just as deftly as I had been.
I stood to greet him and was pulled into an unwanted embrace. He held on tightly as he breathed into my hair. “Mmmm, I knew you was fine, girl, but I didn’t know you was this fine.”
I liked Helix but he was much too forward for me to be comfortable. His hot breath made me cringe but the thought dominating my brain was the suit he wore. Helix was a huge man and I had no idea he could even fit into a suit. Had I ever taken the time to picture him dressed up I would have put him into something loud and ugly but his current garb was very tasteful and downplayed his size instead of accentuating it.
At last he released his firm grip around my waist and held out my chair, which I gladly took.
“White said you’d be here, and here you are.” I sensed nervousness from the hulking man in front of me.
“Yes, here I am.” I was obviously uncomfortable as well.
“I’m sorry to do this to you, Alex, but I knew this was the only way I’d get a date.” All signs of his usual brashness had evaporated, along with his usual manner of speec
h. “I… Have you looked at the menu yet?” He picked his up from the table and began to study it intently.
“No, not yet. I’ve never been here. Could you recommend something?”
“Oh, yes.” His smile was genuine and grateful as he opened his menu.
As we discussed the menu the awkwardness fell away and the topics of conversation became varied. It didn’t take me long to grasp that the person I knew as Helix was nonexistent, he was an invention. An invention to make his clientele more comfortable; make them believe he was just one of them. According to Helix, a big black man needed to walk the walk and talk the talk. It was expected.
When our meals Helix beamed as I complimented him on his choice. The night was full of surprises for me. Not only did Helix’s appearance give me a jolt, his taste in food and conversation skills made me happy I’d been tricked into this date. At some point I started considering the whole thing as a date and not a job. I was genuinely sorry the evening was over when Helix made mention of me getting home safely.
We stood at the curb, waiting for my ride to arrive and when it finally did, he handed me his business card. I flipped it over and saw the words Home Number and a ten-digit number written on the back. Helix opened the passenger door of the Mustang and nodded a greeting to White. Before I got in, he thanked me for a wonderful evening.
“I had a very nice time too,” I replied and stood on my tiptoes to give him a small peck on the cheek before I got in next to White.
“You really shouldn’t lead him on like that,” White’s voice crept into my consciousness.
“What? I had a nice time.”
“So, are you going to accept when he calls for another date?” He asked.
“No.”
“Because when you give a man a kiss, no matter how innocent, it’s an invitation,” he interrupted.
“He’s quite the gentleman. I just wanted him to know I had a good time.” White was starting to piss me off.
Traces of Grey: Book Four of The Alexis Stanton Chronicles Page 8