“It isn’t only that. I don’t… I don’t want them to see me as a charity case, as someone who needs to depend on them financially. I’ve been making ends meet, barely, but I’ve been doing it on my own.”
“Your independence is one of the things I admire about you,” HanYin said. “Yet it doesn’t make you any less to accept help when it is offered. It took me a very long time before I allowed myself to depend on Soon-joon-nim and Cheongul when they first found me. I didn’t want to be viewed as weak.”
“What happened?”
“They didn’t give up on me, and eventually I started to trust them,” HanYin said quietly, remembering that time so long ago. “For years they put up with my fight response in the morning. One day after lessons, Soon-joon-nim came into the room with his hands behind his back. He’d been gone for a long time. Cheongul was with him. The tutor had left for the day, and I was just going over my lessons. I had a hard time learning to write. I was worried, thinking they were going to tell me to leave. I remember that. I think I started to shake a little as they sat down with me at the table. Without a word, Soon-joon-nim set a wrapped package in front of me. The paper was a brilliant red, with gold dragons all over it and a big gold ribbon. I looked at him. I didn’t speak much back then. He told me to open it.”
“What was inside?”
“An alarm clock,” HanYin whispered. “When he’d heard about them, Soon-joon-nim had gone all the way to America to purchase one for me. He didn’t need to say anything to me. I knew why he’d done it.”
“Why?”
“Every time I’d hurt them, I’d cry for hours and hours. They were my family, and I was causing them pain,” HanYin said, his voice tight. “It may not seem like much, considering there were times I forgot to wind it or set it, but Abeoji gave me that very first one and Cheongul said, ‘No more tears.’”
“He did it so you could be in control of when you woke up and not hurt them, which made you cry,” Jong-in said.
“Yes,” HanYin said. “Jin-woo-ya and Min-su dongsaeng are not going to give up on you either.”
“He hasn’t responded… at all,” Jong-in pointed out.
“Jin-woo-ya is one of those people who is very laid-back, but push him past that point, and his anger is something to be reckoned with. He is upset and worried, and you two just argued earlier today. He might not be ready to talk about it yet.”
“Min-su-ya said he shut her down when she tried to talk to him about it afterward,” Jong-in said. “That’s rarely happened.”
“I think people forget Jin-woo-ya has a backbone,” HanYin said with a soft chuckle. “They see that sweet face and think he is easily manipulated.”
“If he’s easily manipulated, I’m the Emperor of the Joseon Dynasty.” Jong-in snorted. Then he looked at HanYin from beneath his lashes. “You think his face is sweet, huh?”
“And I think your face is beautiful and sexy, and those dimples are my weakness,” HanYin said, rolling him onto his back. “You are who I desire, who I dream of, who makes me hard simply with the sound of your voice and your scent on the breeze.”
“You know how to make a guy feel special,” Jong-in panted as they slowly writhed together.
“You are special, Jong-in,” HanYin said and claimed his mouth in a hot kiss. “Let me show you.”
Jong-in ended up not going to campus that night. HanYin kept him too busy with hours of lovemaking in the bedroom, in the kitchen, in the living room. Any chance he got to have Jong-in inside him, HanYin took it.
Cheongul
CHEONGUL LEANED against the wall between the elevators in the lobby, waiting. He crossed his arms over his chest and bounced his leg in agitation as he watched the door. When Jin-woo and Jong-in came in, surprisingly at the same time as his brothers, Cheongul moved without thinking. He shot forward and grabbed the two men by their collars amid HanYin’s and Ki-tae’s protests. He snarled something that made his brothers step back and dragged the two men off. When he found an open conference room, he threw them inside and slammed the door behind him, locking it.
“I don’t mean to be rude, but what the fuck, hyung?” Jin-woo demanded.
“Last night Min-su came storming over to my apartment, furious and in tears… in tears because you two were fighting. Neither one of you would talk to her, and she didn’t know how to help you,” Cheongul growled, his eyes flashing silver and his fangs visible when he spoke. His nails had elongated into sharp black claws. “You two will remain in this room until you’ve worked out whatever problem you have with each other, and then you will go reassure Min-su that you’re not going to abandon each other.”
“What?” Jong-in said. “What gave her that idea?”
“She said you two never fight, not like this, not talking to each other, and worse, not talking to her,” Cheongul said, barely controlling his anger. “I’m going to leave so you two can talk and so I can calm down, if that’s even possible now. When you come out, you better have worked this shit out. Whatever is going on isn’t worth your friendship. Don’t let it ruin that.”
Without giving them a chance to say anything, Cheongul left the room. He found HanYin and Ki-tae on the other side, looking none too happy. When he caught the low growling, Cheongul sighed. “They’re fine.”
“What the fuck, Cheongul?” Ki-tae demanded.
“Let’s not do this in the hall.” He led the way into the next conference room over.
“Explain, now,” HanYin said.
“Min-su came over last night,” he said with a sigh as he sat down. Faced with the anger in his brothers’ eyes and the hint of their fear scenting the air, the anger drained out of Cheongul. “She was in tears because she was so worried about them and their fight. I just had to do something. I didn’t think.”
“Clearly, because Jong-in may not be ready to tell Jin-woo-ya what’s going on. He shouldn’t be forced to do that,” HanYin said. “And Jin-woo-ya, he’s already worried enough as it is about Jong-in and about Ki-tae, so throwing him into this situation wasn’t a plus for him either.”
“I said I didn’t think, HanYin,” Cheongul repeated. “What did you expect me to do?”
“I get it,” Ki-tae said. “You wanted to make her pain go away, and that’s all that mattered.”
“Yeah.” The next thing he knew, Ki-tae slammed Cheongul up against the wall, his baby brother lifting him off the ground, claws curled in his shirt.
“You ever do that to Jin-woo again, and I will kick your ass,” Ki-tae growled. “Are we clear?”
“Yes.”
“Good.” Ki-tae let him go, turned, and stormed out of the room, leaving HanYin and Cheongul alone. It was then Cheongul spotted the claw marks on Ki-tae’s neck and jaw. He looked up, and the emotion in HanYin’s eyes stabbed through his heart.
“Ki-tae had to hold me back from going through the door. I hurt him,” HanYin whispered. “That’s how much Jong-in means to me.”
“HanYin.”
“Don’t ever put us in that position again.” HanYin’s eyes glistened. “I don’t want to hurt either of you.”
Then he left too, and Cheongul hung his head. He had managed to anger Ki-tae, cause HanYin to hurt him, and upset HanYin with both actions, and all because he couldn’t control his anger at the tears Min-su had cried.
What the hell was wrong with him? He wasn’t an irrational person. With his issues, he tried hard to think first. Yet when he’d seen the tears in her eyes, he’d wanted to maul whatever had caused her pain, a disproportionate reaction as she hadn’t had a chance to tell him what was going on. He’d managed to project an outward calm last night, but inside, he’d been seething. Now, he just caused more people pain. Why had he gone off the handle like that? He shouldn’t have grabbed them and dragged them off. He should have used his head, thought things through before he acted. With the way his luck was going, Min-su would be pissed when she found out about it too.
Pushing off the wall Ki-tae had slammed in him into, Cheongul ma
de his way down to the gym and started beating himself up in the healthiest way possible. They had an hour before they needed to head to dance practice, so he needed to get rid of as much of this angry energy as possible before then. He was going to be exhausted when they were done for the day, but if it made him unable to do stupid shit, all the better. He couldn’t hurt anyone if he was passed out in his bed, asleep.
Jin-woo
“I’M SCARED,” Jin-woo said softly as he sat down in the chair at the head of the table. “I don’t want to lose you, and all I can see is you pushing yourself until your heart gives out.”
Jong-in joined him at the table. “There’s something I need to tell you.”
“What is it?”
“I’m not….” Jong-in stopped and took a deep breath and then started again. “I’m not human.”
“Okay,” Jin-woo said with a shrug. “So what are you?”
“That’s it? ‘So what are you’ is your only response?” Jong-in looked confused.
“I’m dating a Vampire, and one of my best friends is a Shifter. How is this supposed to surprise me?” Jin-woo snorted. “So what are you?”
“A Fox-Spirit,” Jong-in said, and the expression in his eyes lightened.
“Wait… did you think I was going to be upset about this, just like you thought I was going to be upset about you being gay?” Jin-woo narrowed his eyes. “Seriously? I should smack you.”
“Please don’t. This was really hard for me to say, and being gay is not nearly as upsetting as being a Fox-Spirit. Look, I don’t have a lot of control over this. I mean, I get too upset, and I pop ears and two tails, and my eyes go lavender. Sometimes it happens all at once, and other times it’s piecemeal, like I’ll get just the ears. There are times when I get so overwhelmed with shit, I change completely, and I don’t remember anything afterward, which is terrifying. Until just a couple of days ago, I didn’t even know what I was, just that I wasn’t normal.”
Jin-woo scooched his chair around the table to Jong-in and took his hands. “You are one of my dearest friends, Jong-in-a. Being a Fox-Spirit doesn’t change that, doesn’t change who you are and have always been to me. I see you, your face pale, dark circles under your eyes and determined to do it all on your own, and it kills me to not be able to help because I don’t know what’s wrong.”
“I don’t want to be a burden.”
“You’re not,” Jin-woo said, trying to make him see. “We care. I care. Min-su-ya was right. You could never be a burden to us. Tell me.”
He held his breath as Jong-in stared at him as if searching for something in his eyes. He must have seen it because, slowly, Jong-in began to talk. The words were halting at first, but then grew smoother the more Jin-woo simply listened. He didn’t interrupt, he didn’t try to figure out how to respond, he just listened and that appeared to be the key. When he finally stopped, Jin-woo didn’t say anything. He pulled Jong-in into his arms and hugged him tight.
“Thank you,” he said softly.
“What for? Burdening you with my problems?”
“For trusting me, Jong-in-a,” he said as he leaned back. “With all of it. I know you want to make it on your own. I feel the same way, and if I could live without having to have any interaction with my aunt, I would do it in a heartbeat. She’s a miserable, bitter, bigoted, hateful old bitch. Thankfully my grandparents knew she would have never treated me well or helped me in any way if they hadn’t set up the trust as they did. I only have to get through two more years before she’s out of my life, but it’s a long time. What I want you to promise me is that you’ll come to me if you need help. I know you have to work—I get that. I just want you to take care of yourself too. It doesn’t seem like it most of the time, but sleep is important. You need to give your body and your brain a break to be able to function. I don’t want you to end up in the hospital, or worse.”
“I’ll do my best. That’s all I can promise.”
“That’s all I ask.”
“I got really good sleep last night,” Jong-in said with a small smile.
“I can see that.” Jin-woo couldn’t resist. “I see you came in with HanYin-a this morning. Is he the reason you got such a… restful night?”
“Shut it,” Jong-in said, blushing furiously. “Yes, he is, dammit.”
“I’m glad you took the chance, Jong-in-a. He makes you happy, makes you smile, and I love seeing that.”
“We’re good?”
“Yeah, we’re good.” Jin-woo nodded. “Now we need to get to work, or we’re going to be in trouble.”
“We should probably arrange to have lunch with Min-su-ya and talk to her,” Jong-in said.
“I suppose we’re expected to apologize too.” Jin-woo sighed.
“Probably.”
“She cried.”
“Yeah.”
“That sucks.”
“Yeah.”
“She’s going to hit us—hard.”
“Yeah.” Jong-in nodded. “But we’ll live, and everything will be back to normal, or relatively, at least.”
They walked out of the conference room, arms over each other’s shoulders. It was good to not be at odds with Jong-in. Jin-woo had been scared and frustrated and angry, and now he could admit it hurt how Jong-in didn’t seem to trust him. It had made him question their friendship, and Jin-woo hadn’t liked that. Jin-woo rubbed his eyes, exhausted.
“You don’t look like you’re getting much sleep either,” Jong-in said as they walked. “Is Ki-tae hyung keeping you up all night?”
“I wish, but no,” Jin-woo said. “I’ve been having really disturbing dreams lately.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“Later, I think,” Jin-woo said. “I’m almost finished with the performance video. Once I get this last bit of timing right, I’ll give it to Hyung-jun seonbae to go over.”
“Okay. I’ll see you at lunch, then.”
“Sure. See you then.” Jin-woo waved and then went to the studio.
Just before he walked through the door, a coffee cup appeared in front of him. He turned to Ki-tae and smiled. Ki-tae didn’t look reassured.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“Yes,” Jin-woo said after taking a sip. It was perfect. “Jong-in-a and I talked and got things straightened out.”
“You’re not mad at me?”
“For what?”
“For letting it happen to begin with?” Ki-tae said softly.
“No, I think we were all taken by surprise, and I have some choice words for Cheongul hyung when I see him again.”
“He wasn’t thinking clearly.”
“I know he wasn’t, but that still doesn’t give him the right to drag us around like that,” Jin-woo said. “It was embarrassing and a bit frightening.”
“I’m sorry he scared you.”
“You’re not the one who should be apologizing,” Jin-woo said, putting a hand on Ki-tae’s arm. He gripped Ki-tae’s chin and turned his head to get a better look at the marks. “What the hell are these?”
“Nothing.”
“They’re not nothing, Ki-tae.” Jin-woo glared at him. “You didn’t have them this morning, so obviously, something happened between then and now. Don’t keep things like this from me… please.”
“Let’s just say HanYin didn’t appreciate Cheongul dragging you two off either and it would have gotten uglier if I hadn’t stopped him from breaking through the door,” Ki-tae said. “It really is nothing. They’ll be gone in an hour, maybe two.”
“I don’t like seeing you hurt.” Jin-woo could hear the trembling in his voice and hated it.
“I know,” Ki-tae said as he pulled Jin-woo into his arms. “I don’t like you being hurt either. I’m sorry.”
“Apology accepted. Now enough of this. You’re still coming over tonight?”
“Try and stop me,” Ki-tae said with his sexy smirk firmly in place. “I have to go to a torture session now.”
“Dance practice isn’t that b
ad, Ki-tae.” Jin-woo laughed.
“Gojira seonbae is nice to you. She thinks you’re adorable. Me she has it out for. Miss one practice and that woman holds a grudge forever,” Ki-tae said with a roll of his eyes.
“Yet none of you really complain, do you? She’s damn good at what she does, and she has made you three some of the best dancers out there. Why don’t you cut her some slack?”
“If we did that, she’d wonder what was wrong,” Ki-tae said with a wide-eyed innocent expression before stealing a kiss and then hurrying on his way. Well, as much as Ki-tae hurried anywhere, leaving Jin-woo to his work.
Several hours later, Jin-woo was nibbling on his thumb as Hyung-jun got settled in the studio chair. Had it been just Hyung-jun, Jin-woo might not have been so nervous, but Soon-joon and ChenBao were there too. He wasn’t expecting that.
“Relax, dongsaeng,” ChenBao said gently. “It’s going to be wonderful.”
“I hope so,” he murmured just as Hyung-jun hit Play.
Four minutes stretched on for an eternity as they watched the screen. No one made any comments, and Jin-woo didn’t know if that was good or bad. When the video ended, they turned to him almost as one. He looked from one to the other, his stomach knotting as they continued to remain silent. He wanted to ask so badly, but he forced himself to wait.
“That was… beautiful,” ChenBao said with a bright smile. “I love how it started with those forest sounds. The slight echo made them seem otherworldly and immediately set the tone.”
“You used the sweeping camera shots perfectly, not overdoing them,” Soon-joon said. “And you gave each performer an equal amount of screen time, not favoring one over the other.”
“I know you were having trouble with timing the other day, but you worked it out perfectly. There’s just one more thing to do,” Hyung-jun said.
“What’s that?” Jin-woo asked, not sure he could say anything further.
“Put your name on it,” Hyung-jun said with a huge smile. “We’ll work the credits a little later.”
Night Kiss Page 38