Chapter 28
The Royal Treatment
“Announce yourselves!” the King demanded as he ripped the last bite of meat away from a large bone and discarded it to the side.
“My name is Locmire of Fogarth, and these are my companions, Lot Caskill of Galdarath and King Urganox Skullsplitter of Morgorath.”
Both Lot and Urganox nodded their heads as they were introduced.
“My name is King Festus Rottenback. Welcome to Pizenchaffe, travelers. Make yourselves at home,” said the King, spreading his arms wide to show a warm, receptive greeting.
“King Rottenback, we thank you for your hospitality, but we will only be staying for a short time,” said Locmire.
“Oh,” replied the King. "Why so?"
“We are on an important quest, my King,” said Locmire.
Rottenback did not acknowledge Locmire’s last statement. His attention was focused on Urganox.
“King Urganox, eh? It seems that we have not had the pleasure of meeting until now,” he chuckled. “I have not had the pleasure of meeting any of the other kings of the lands. Please sit down and tell me of the affairs of the surface.”
It was easily noticed that Urganox did not care for Rottenback. A look of disgust was painted on his face, and if that was not enough, the grinding of his teeth when addressed by the slob of a King said it all.
“Perhaps in time we will have a proper meeting, King Rottenback, but for now we are looking for an individual we believe to reside in Pizenchaffe,” said King Urganox.
“Oh?” Festus said questioningly. “And who would that be?”
Locmire said, “A Dainty by the name of Oggius Stonefist. Do you know where we may find him?”
All signs of cordiality were rapidly erased from Rottenback's face. His guards took arms and stepped forward. He waved them to halt with his grease covered hand.
“Although I do not like our guest’s intentions, we will still extend our hospitality to the Wizard and the Brazurkin King,” said Rottenback.
His guards returned to their positions.
“Wise decision,” said Urganox.
“Why do you seek, Oggius Stonefist?” Festus asked.
Before Locmire could answer, Urganox spoke, “That is none of your concern. Tell us where to find him so we can take leave. The sight of you turns my stomach.”
“You should watch your tongue! You are a guest in my kingdom. I would hate to remove my hand of hospitality,” said the fat Dainty as he stood, with great effort, from his throne.
“I welcome it,” said Urganox as the grinding of his teeth became ever louder.
“Apologies,” said Locmire. “King Urganox has just been confronted with a major travesty. His emotions run high.”
Festus plopped back down on the throne.
“My King,” said Locmire as he bowed slightly. “Can you tell us of the whereabouts of Oggius Stonefist?”
The fat King sat in private debate, mulling over his response.
“The disgraced King is probably doing what he does best. Falling over drunk somewhere. I would start by searching the local pubs,” said Rottenback.
“Thank you, my King. If you do not mind me asking, what exactly happened to Oggius? I thought that only a Stonefist could hold the throne of Pizenchaffe?” asked Locmire.
“I do mind you asking!” roared the King. “But I will tell you all the same if it will make you take leave from here. Oggius was removed from the throne because he was unfit to lead. He was the last living member of the Stonefist clan, so the government council had to select a new King. I was the only one found worthy.”
“I don't know if I want to meet King Stonefist if he was more unfit to rule than this pathetic excuse for a king,” Lot said to Urganox.
Upon hearing this statement Festus became enraged.
“I have grown tired of your insults. You come into my kingdom and insult me while I sit upon my throne! Guards, seize these men!” ordered the Rottenback as he pointed at the trio before him.
A round Daintish guard ran straight for Urganox. Urganox drew back his leg and met the Dainty’s chest with his large foot. The guard went flying through the air and crashed into the wall. Two more guards charged straight at Lot. He jumped into the air and flipped behind them. He landed, quickly turned and violently slammed their heads together, crumpling the stout warriors to the ground. The last guard ran at Locmire, but the Wizard stood his ground, not moving an inch. When the Dainty got within range, Locmire extended his staff, striking the Dainty hard in the throat. The guard's knees instantaneously became like that of jelly, and he fell to the floor. Before Festus could call for more reinforcements, Urganox seized him by the throat and hoisted him high into the air.
“You disgust me,” said Urganox as he pulled the crown from Rottenback's oily head. The Brazurkin stared long and hard into the unworthy King's eyes. The grinding of Urganox's teeth could now be heard even louder by his companions. “You are a disgrace. You tarnish the name of king. I should end your pathetic life right now!”
“That is enough, Urganox,” said Locmire.
Urganox looked at Locmire and then back at the Daintish King. He released his grip, and Festus fell hard to the ground.
“We will take leave now, my King. I am sorry for the unpleasantness. I do appreciate your help,” said the Wizard as he turned his back and began to walk away.
Urganox looked down at Rottenback and said, “I am keeping this!” holding the crown in front of Rottenback’s face. “You do not deserve to wear it.”
Urganox took the crown and followed Locmire out of the castle. Golgar stood terror struck as the three travelers strode past.
Lot stopped and said to Golgar, “I feel sorry for you if you claim this man as your King.”
Golgar was speechless.
The travelers left the castle and began to make their way back to the Broken Lamien to rejoin Red. They had to move quickly because they had just assaulted the King, and even though he was not a respectable king, he was still a king, and a line had been crossed that should not have been.
Locmire's Quest: Book One A Tales from Calencia Novel Page 47