by Jeanne Allen
For so long, I assumed the nightmares were a result of my guilt from what happened when I was ten. Now, I think they came because I was afraid of my own power. Terrified of what I could do, the monster in the mirror. When I accepted the monster on that battlefield and borrowed from its strength to protect the ones I love, I rid myself of the hold my fear had over me, over my memories.
I’m happy to be at least working on a peace with the monster, but new questions arise as I drift off to sleep. Why am I different than the other Agoras? Were my parents as powerful as I am, or am I some kind of freak of nature?
The inability to look at myself from the viewpoint of my own history bears on me more than before.
Turning in the bed I share with Sebastian and Forrest, I burrow into the latter’s broad back A humming warmth spreads from our pre-Bond and, I suspect, my own oddly sentient Agora Power.
I struggle to close myself off from more “what ifs,” but one more slips into my mind. Why were my Omás treating me like a stranger?
Chapter 5
I wake up the next morning to the dull gray of cheap motel bedding and an incessant pounding on my door.
“Okay, okay!” I tumble out of the bed to answer Mr. Rude-door-manners. “It’s probably—”
Yep. Sure enough, an unnaturally chipper Lucas greets me. The morning is way too kind to this type of evil Goblin.
“Come on, get dressed, we’re going—” Lucas stops what he’s about to say, his eyes traveling the length of my body.
My morning brain hasn’t yet kicked in, so it takes a few moments of his perusal and a soft breeze in the direction of my nether regions to realize I answered the door in my bra and panties.
I look down, a bit mortified, but hey, these are my cutest pair, so they can’t look that—
My thoughts cut off as Lucas pushes me in and shuts the door behind him.
His chest is suddenly very close to mine, and hot breath tickles my ears. “How about I give you a proper good morning, Sweet Pea?”
“A proper good mor—”
Lucas stops my question by pulling me into a slow kiss, his lips soft and plentiful. I worry about morning breath for about two point five seconds before I don’t care anymore. I let him cup my chin with both hands, bringing me up to a level where he can deepen his diving tongue.
I’m blank. Literally nothing but a mess of desire heated from the inside and desperate for something I can’t even name. All I know is I want more. More of what, I’m not sure.
All too soon, he breaks off the kiss. His eyes practically shoot fireworks, and his face barely contains the Cheshire-cat grin growing on it.
“Good morning,” he says, his voice still a bit low and gravely. The South London accent he usually keeps hidden finding its way out.
He strokes my face once before abruptly leaving the room.
I stare at the closed door a good thirty seconds before he opens it again. “Pancakes in thirty. Meet us in the lobby.”
Then, he’s gone again. I sink to the floor as my legs become a peculiar form of human gelatin. I’m glad the weird distance from last night is gone, but wasn’t that a bit too close? The hormones I’ve kept a tight leash on since they started going haywire a few weeks ago are pushing me to do all sorts of scandalous things.
By the grace of the cheese lords, I push these feeling aside and focus on the task at hand.
Honestly.
These men are dangerous.
Turns out the café next to the motel we stayed in serves, quite literally, the best blueberry pancakes I’ve ever tasted.
I’m so into my food heaven I even ignore the pointed sighs coming my way from a pouting Lyle. Now that Forrest is all healed up and back to his normal stoic self, Lyle has all the freedom to be irrational about me liking someone else’s cooking.
“Stop pouting. So, she likes their pancakes. You’ll just have to get the recipe or something,” Jin says after the umpteenth sigh.
“The recipe?” Lyle seethes, aghast.
“Wrong choice of words, bro,” Lucas mutters, for once not even teasing.
Before Jin can say something even more unhelpful, I scramble to change the subject. “What was up with last night?”
And the award for avoids-conversations-by-bringing-up-the-other-thing-she-doesn’t-want-to-talk-about goes to…
“What about last night? A lot happened,” Jackson asks, either too dense to realize what I mean or hoping that’s not what I meant.
“Well, um…” I can’t really back out now. I’m the one who brought it up.
“You mean the stuff with Nathanial?” Forrest offers, definitely not getting it.
Jackson’s hands clench, and Jin’s eyes darken at the mention of his name.
I feel guilty for bringing up last night at all, but I have to know.
“She means the part of the night where we were all too awed to treat her like the woman we love,” Sebastian answers. Cerulean eyes catch mine. He holds them steadily, without even a hint of avoidance.
I love that about my youngest Kladí. He won’t hold back, but he’s not cruel or cold. I have a feeling he won’t ever tell me what he thinks I want to hear. I’m so glad he’s finally come back to us. We need him.
I give a small smile before ducking my eyes to play with the last few bites of pancake left on my plate. “Yeah, that.”
Silence.
Then, Jackson says, “Rose, look at me.”
I glance up to find Lyle, Jin, Jackson, and Sebastian staring straight ahead, eyes on me. I can feel Lucas and Forrest turn toward me on either side. I’m surrounded by steady eyes and determined expressions, except Jin, who barely shows his emotions. But I do catch the clench in his jaw and know he feels the same way as the others.
“We’re sorry we acted so… weird around you last night. We were just so shocked about what you did that—”
“What I did?” I cringe at the squeak in my voice.
Are they disgusted with me for killing Lewis? Did they think I was too violent? Evil? A murderer? Maybe I am. Maybe I’m not the right Agora for these amazing—
“No, no. Not like that. Nothing like that, Rose. We meant how you were able to use your power,” Lucas jumps in, putting a comforting hand over mine so I can feel his sincerity.
“How I used my power?” Now, I’m confused, I knew I was stronger than most Agora, but I didn’t think it was that awe-inspiring. Especially considering what they can do with their pre-Bond Gifts.
Jackson nods. “What you did last night, using that much Agora Power even before you Awaken, it was—”
“Freaking awesome,” Lucas jumps in again.
When I turn to see those Goblin eyes dancing, I can’t help but relax a bit at the sight.
“Yes. Freaking awesome, to put it lightly.” Jackson smiles, too, though not as wickedly. “That kind of Agora Power, to be able to Will to death, that’s actually only seen in, well, in—”
“Royalty,” Jin says. His eyes, what I can tell from them, are serious.
I find myself drawn into his level expression. He isn’t showing much, but I know Jin. I can tell from the barest hints what he’s feeling. Right now, he’s worried.
“Royalty?” I whisper.
“Plus,” Jackson continues, drawing my eyes back to him, “the way you manipulated the Agora Power into a physical form—it’s not that it’s never happened, but it hasn’t happened in a long, long time. We only have some vague stories about it, and even then, the ability only showed up in—”
“Royalty,” I say, my voice a bit stronger this time.
Jackson nods slowly.
“So, what? You all think I’m some kind of lost princess?” I mean the jab as an ill-humored joke, but no one laughs.
Even Lucas only gently squeezes my hand, giving me a boost of calm.
“Seriously?” I don’t even know what to say. The idea that I’m a Royal seems like some kind of fairytale. This is the real world, and things like long lost princesses don’t happen.
/>
Well, then again, I am a mutant having blueberry pancakes with my six mutant boyfriends who are literally linked to me by some kind of supernatural love-chain. So…
“I’ve suspected your ancestry was Royal for a while, but now I think it’s almost certain one or more of your parents were, or are, of Royal blood,” Sebastian says, but by the subtle nods and lack of surprise from the others, it seems like he speaks for everyone.
Talk about major identity crisis. Not only were the parents who didn’t want me Phósopoi, but they were also Royal? Royal Phósopoi, from what I’ve seen, are incredibly protective of their offspring. Even Queen Jacqueline would constantly send over servants with Gifts to not-so-subtly check on the welfare of her son. If I’m a Royal, why did they abandon me? I don’t want to think about the answer to that question, so I push it aside.
Jackson continues. “We won’t know the answers to our questions now. Let’s wait until we can find out more before we speculate on how you came to us. For now, let’s focus on the fact that you did come to us.” Jackson leans in and his large hands cover the one not claimed by Lucas.
My fork clatters on the plate as I open myself to his comfort and assurance.
“You are ours, Rose. That’s all that matters. Even if we never find out where you came from, we are and always will be, your family.”
“You’re stuck with us now, Sweet Pea,” Lucas adds, his expression serious, though there’s no hiding those dancing mocha eyes.
“Rose’s mysterious parentage aside, let’s talk about what we’ll do now,” Lyle breaks in, causing the others to sit back, each thinking on our current dilemma.
“We can’t go back to Phóspolis,” I say.
Heads nod in assent.
“I sent some messages to a few trusted contacts to warn them about Nathanial, and they will get the message to my mother as soon as they’re able,” Jackson says. “Other than that, we have to go off the Phósopoi radar. We have no way of knowing who he’s working with, or how far this thing reaches.”
I straighten in my chair. “We’re assuming it’s some kind of group?”
“Most definitely. I know my brother—” Jackson pauses, and my heart breaks as a flash of pain runs through his eyes before he collects himself. “At least, I thought I did. At any rate, Nathanial wouldn’t show his cards like this unless he has someone much more powerful to back him up.”
“Lewis, also, was not stupid. They have to have been working for someone,” Jin adds.
I detect no hint of accusation in him, even though I look for it almost desperately. I can’t imagine he’s totally fine with me killing his former best friend, but my Assassin gives me no reason to believe otherwise.
I move on with my line of questioning. “And you think that someone is a group?”
Jin jerks a nod. “I sent out some feelers to my own contacts. We don’t know for sure, but my gut says this was organized. I’ve lived too long to ignore my instincts. Plus, based on what you said Nathanial said, this is definitely some kind of organization.”
“Okay. I trust you and your instincts.” Jin gifts me with a rare smirk. “So, what now? How do we hide from the Phósopoi?” Worry makes my voice squeak.
“No planes,” Forrest says.
“Too traceable. Nothing that takes a ticket, either, so no busses or boats,” Jin finishes.
“Felicity, the woman who healed Forrest, can be trusted, but we can’t rely on any more friends. Even if they can be trusted, it may put them in danger.” Jackson pushes his flyaway hair back in agitation.
“I contacted my family. Someone will meet us wherever we go with IDs, bank accounts, whatever we need,” Sebastian mentions.
“Won’t that be dangerous for them?” I ask. I like Sebastian’s family, though they can be overbearing, and I can’t stomach the idea of them getting hurt.
Sebastian gives me a chillingly wry smirk. “Don’t worry about them, Rose. They can take care of themselves.”
I believe him. Sebastian’s Alpha persona is doing the same thing to my hormones that Lucas’s kiss did this morning, so I grunt at him and look away into the amused eyes of Forrest. That slow, sexy grin doesn’t help at all. I have to force myself to pay attention to his words.
Words, Rose. Words. Not beautiful, lickable tattoos or bulging—
“Rose?” Lyle’s Mother Hen radar must be going because he looks concerned. “Are you okay? Your face is red.”
“She’s fine,” Lucas chokes out. I don’t even want to know what he’s feeling from me right now.
Even Jackson gives me a knowing look before gesturing for Forrest to continue. “As I was saying, there’s too many Phósopoi up north, near King Richard’s Seat. We need to go south.”
“But without passports, we have to stay in-country,” Sebastian offers.
“And we need to leave quickly. They figured out Rose was our Agora too easily last time to dawdle in this area.” Jackson looks troubled.
I don’t like remembering that encounter, either. Kira was as fun as a stale piece of unbuttered toast. “So, where?” I ask again.
I’ve never been outside the State, so I’m useless.
“Atlanta is a large city and is pretty far south,” Forrest suggests.
Jackson nods. “That could work.”
“Not a lot of Phósopi, but that also means we’d be without allies if there’s another attack.” Jin looks over at Jackson. They share some kind of bro-telepathy before they both turn back to the group at the same time.
Amusement rolls off Lucas.
I smile; we’ve come a long way since Jin first joined us in the beginning.
Jin fills the rest of us in. “We need Knights, mature Kladí who haven’t Bonded or who have very loose Bonds, who can be trusted and would be willing to go into hiding with us.”
Silence. Again.
“How on earth will we find Kladí like that?” Luas bursts out, frustration replacing his earlier amusement.
“I’d ask my family, but I’m sure they’re being watched by now, along with any of our known contacts. The most they can do is give us some help from time-to-time, but too much of an absence will be noted,” Sebastian says.
I can tell he’s frustrated, too.
Who can we ask? A Mature Kladí who will be willing to help, but who aren’t known family or friends?
Then, it hits me. Yes. They would be perfect. “I know who we can ask.”
It doesn’t take long for the guys to agree with my idea.
With a decision made, we once again head out on the road. This time, at least, we have a semblance of a plan.
Chapter 6
After changing vehicles, we get on the road.
While Forrest drives, Jin and Jackson use burner phones to reach out to people they trust. With our destination in mind, they contact Sebastian's family to ready paperwork and funds, then send out messages to some trusted friends, trying to figure out who's behind the attempted kidnapping.
We make it eight hours into our travels before we’re all too sick of being in the car and decide to stop. Jin finds yet another motel, this one right outside the city limits of St. Louis, and everyone bunkers down except Jin and Jackson.
“We may have a lead,” Jackson announces.
Jin nods. “We received contact from a guy who claims to have information on who Nathanial’s working for. We’re going to go meet him.”
“Wait, he contacted you?” I frown. That sounds super shady.
They nod and head for the door.
No way they’re going to go meet Mr. Shady alone. I jump up. “I want to go with you.”
Jackson and Jin stop midway through the door of our motel room and turn back. “No,” is printed all over their faces, but neither says a thing, either from shock at my request or a desire to hear me out.
Either way, I take the opportunity to continue. “Every time you guys do anything dangerous, you leave me out of it. You did that when you were investigating the death of the Duchess
and Sebastian’s coma.” I hold my hand up to stop their protests. “I know a lot was going on at that time. I get it. I wasn’t emotionally ready to help out then, but I am now. It’s me they want, and I have a right to be there when you talk to this guy.”
I desperately try to look confident that this is a good idea, when in reality, the logical part of me is only about fifteen percent sure, at most. But I’m sick of standing on the sidelines. I let the fear of my power keep me out of the game for too long, and now I want to test my rapidly weakening boundaries.
Jin unfreezes first. When he sighs and turns those bottomless eyes on me, I try not to squirm under their magnetic gaze. He always looks as if he reads secrets like I read books. Knowing Jin, he probably does. He continues searching for a few moments before giving a slight nod.
To my surprise, Jackson also agrees. “Okay, if Jin thinks it’s fine, I won’t object. But stay with us. This man is not a friend of ours, just an informant.”
“Got it. Just let me change real fast.” I grab my bag and go into the bathroom before they change their minds. Within five minutes, I’m back out and ready to go.
My Prince gives me one of those warm smiles I love so much before he offers his hand. I take it and follow them out to the car Forrest found for us.
Out of the corner of my eye, I catch Jin winking at me and nearly trip. He’s been doing that a lot lately, winking, and every time it catches me off guard, which, of course, makes him do it more. Jin, I’ve found, has an even darker mischievous streak than my Goblin.
Jackson heads toward St. Louis.
Apparently, Mr. Shady likes to hang out at a bar called The Devil’s Mustache, complete with a giant red fuzzy mustache hanging over the front door.
I raise my eyebrows at Jackson.
He gives me a tiny smirk of amusement.
Who knew the Prince had such a weird sense of humor? Though, maybe it’s a Phósopoi thing. Then, I look over at Jin, who barely gives the monstrosity a second glance. Maybe it’s a Royal thing. Royalty is known for being eccentric, but what do I know? I got Cinderellaed into this mess.