Panic swept through him as he struggled to understand what was happening; there was pain in his neck and this strange lapping sensation. He closed his eyes and saw her lying in the arms of Graham, her blood forming a small pool on the dirty concrete floor underneath her still body. Her eyes fluttered open and stared into his – and then she was gone. Sam howled in anguish. Great racking sobs tore raggedly from his throat, drowning out the high pitched keening which Elisabeth still continued upstairs. It wasn’t long before the revenants joined his screaming cries with their own howling. The sound he emitted sent a shiver through all who heard him; it was normally only reserved for the ones who had lost a great love and Sam truly believed he had.
As his cries died down and he was left heaving small sobs at the image that remained imprinted in his mind, the door to the upstairs floor opened and Cassiopeia made her way down to Sam. A blindfold was in one hand and a long, wickedly curved silver blade was in the other. As she wrapped the blindfold around his eyes, he didn’t try to stop her. Without a word she began to run the blade over his healed skin. He welcomed the pain she inflicted upon him; nothing could be worse than what he had just witnessed. He would prefer if she cut out his unbeating heart and fed it to the revenants; it would be a better fate than an existence without his love. His silence was eerie as Cassiopeia carved up his marbled flesh with the silver blade, leaving long, patterned gouges and tears on his body. She tried to cause him some form of pain, but nothing moved him anymore. As she finished up, she was disturbed by his distance and lack of response. She left him hanging from his chained wrists with blood pooling beneath his feet, blood that reminded him of Jade’s blood spilled on the dusty grey floor.
* * *
Cleaning her blade, she watched him carefully before making her way up the stairs to find Oskaar. She would send Raphael down to oversee his placement into the revenants’ room. The revenants roamed freely in there and she would see to it that Sam would be chained to the wall. She had spilled enough of his blood to entice them to play but they would not eat him; he was vampire, after all, just like them. She could not however guarantee that they would not try and kill him, so she would have them chained too, so as to not have too much damage inflicted. Samuels’s behaviour concerned her and Oskaar would have to hear of Sam’s strange behaviour. He had never been completely immune to their tortures; he was not a screamer, as some were, and she enjoyed their pain and suffering. Sam was an internaliser but he still had visceral responses, particularly to the silver blades she favoured. His silence and stillness troubled her and she knew deep down within her own heart that only one thing could cause such a reaction, for she had felt it herself when Sam had left her all those years ago.
Chapter Twenty Two
As my eyes focused on the spreading crimson on the cement floor, I noticed the thundering in my ears. I fought against the darkness threatening to eat at the edges of my vision. Why did it feel like I should just let go? Let go of what? I asked myself. The voice in my head told me to relax again, not to fight. I didn’t want to fight. The voice sounded beautiful, melodic, as if it should belong to an angel. I relaxed into his grip as once again the blackness began to overwhelm me. It felt so warm and inviting, like the warm red on the floor. The beautiful warm red of my own blood spreading in a pool beneath me. Everything is beautiful when you’re dying, I thought to myself.
Suddenly, I felt it; the cuts, bruises and him, his fangs sunk deep into my neck. As I began to struggle beneath him, he lifted his face from where he had bitten me. He had been beautiful, but then they all are; now he looked more like an animal. Blood dribbled slowly down his chin as he tried once again to force me under with his eyes, but now his magic was broken. I felt his power pour out towards me only to break around me like water flowing around a rock. It confused him; I saw it flicker in his eyes the uncertainty. This was my only opportunity because unless I got away from him right now, he wasn’t going to try and put me under his control as he drained my life out of me. This time it wouldn’t be beautiful and peaceful; this time it would hurt. Hell, it was starting to hurt now.
I reached both hands towards him; he hadn’t bothered trying to restrain me, didn’t feel it was necessary. Usually when a vamp puts you under with their power, you don’t wake up; luckily for me, I’m not an average human. Grabbing his face in my hands, I pulled him closer as though I were going to kiss him. I saw fear filter into his eyes as I pulled my own power from deep within me. It felt as though it was coming from a very faraway place and it had a long way to travel to reach the surface, but it did; it bubbled up within my body, flooded down through my arms and out of my hands. I pushed it into him, the feeling of death. My eyes began to water from the strain; clearly, I had over done it with everything. Healing Sam, the visions, everything; it was beginning to become too much for my human body to handle – and I certainly wasn’t used to all this power; it felt alien to me. His eyes, which had seemed so enticing below, were now simply a mud brown colour that had darkened in his panic. Ripping away from me, a mixture between a snarl and a shriek tore from his mouth. I watched him writhe in agony as he gripped his chest with both hands, trying to claw the feeling out from under his skin – or at least that was how it looked to me.
Glancing around, I knew I had only seconds to find my way out of this place and into the sunlight before he came around from my little trick. I stood unsteadily on shaking legs and tried to run for the door nearest to me. I could see sunlight peeping at me around its frame, casting a soft glow into the grey light of this place. As I slammed into it, I prayed it hadn’t become stuck behind me as I had entered… I fumbled for the handle only to notice the room had gone silent behind me. Grabbing it with both hands, I pushed down on the handle with all my strength. The hairs on the back of my neck stood to attention; my own little alarm system. I felt the air around me shift as he made one last grab for me before I pushed the door outwards into the bright midday sun. I fell onto my knees in the pool of light and crawled further away from the door. I heard his cry of pain as he caught some of the sun’s rays on his sensitive skin.
I crawled further forward into the light just to be sure I was completely out of his reach and sat down hard on the cold ground. Tentatively, I reached my hand up to my neck. It felt moist. I pulled my hand away and stared for a minute at the red stain on my fingers; I gazed at it until my vision became blurred and I realised I was crying. Tearing a piece of my tattered t-shirt, I pressed it against my neck. I couldn’t hide from it anymore; I needed help with all this stuff. Being independent and trying to find Sam on my own was fine, but not at the expense of dying before I found him.
I tried to get to my feet. I wasn’t going to just lie down and bleed to death; I wouldn’t give that creep the satisfaction. My head swam as I straightened my cramped and bloodied legs. I almost fell to the ground again as soon as I managed to stand up. I closed my eyes and tried to chase the fog from my brain. When I felt steady enough, I opened my eyes and blinked once, twice, until my eyes adjusted to the light. The sun beat down on my aching shoulders. I had to move. He’d be out looking for me soon and I had to get somewhere safe.
As I lurched forward in what I hoped was the direction of my car, I thought once again about my decision to come here. The vampire with the soulless eyes who’d almost emptied me on the warehouse floor – or Graham, as he liked to be called – leaving the note for me had been very clever; he knew I wouldn’t be able to resist and since he had arranged to meet me in daylight hours, I had thought I would be safe. I knew what Graham was. I knew given the opportunity, he would try and kill me, turn me maybe; with some vampires you could never be too sure, but he would certainly kill me. Only the thought of him, the one I’d lost, made me go so willingly into the arms of that monster.
“Sam.” The name echoed around in my head. Tears ran hot down my face at the thought of never seeing him in the flesh again. I had to find him. I couldn’t let him down; he hadn’t let me down, hadn’t given me up to them. I pic
tured his face as he’d told me what they wanted; my memory failed me with the image of him. He was never as beautiful in my memory as he was in reality; I could never seem to completely capture all of him. As I remembered him now, he was a little hazy. His hair flopped down onto his brow. It was such a rich black colour; it wasn’t cold like most black is. His hair and its colour looked like you could drown in its depth. It contrasted so sharply against his pale skin. His eyes peering at me from their frame of thick black lashes; his spiralling green eyes, the only eyes I had ever gotten utterly and irrevocably lost in. He’d had to pull me out himself; my gift could never help me against the force of Sam’s gaze. As I reached my car, I wiped the tears off my face with the back of my hand and remembered what Sam had said that day. The day my heart had been irreparably broken. He’d reached his hand out towards me, tracing my cheek with his thumb as though he could memorise it through touch alone. I pressed my face into the cold embrace of his hand.
“I won’t let them have you,” he’d said, stroking my face as he looked at me with pain filled his eyes. “I’ll never let them have you; I’ll die before I let them have you. You’re mine, Jade. My heart, my being; it’s all yours. All that I am, I give to you.”
Leaning into me, his lips had brushed mine tenderly and then he’d crushed me against him, his lips pressing into mine as though he was trying to melt the two of us into the one person. The force of the emotion had almost crippled me and I’d known the loss of my happy ending within his embrace. Pulling away from me, his breathing was ragged. He’d leaned his forehead against mine and whispered, “I love you, from now until eternity. Remember that; and when I’m gone, don’t look for me.” With that, he’d ripped away from me and was gone. I still felt the rush of wind and the ghost of his touch on my face, but he was gone.
Looking back on it now, I should have done more to persuade him to stay. Since he’d left, my whole world had become one huge mess. I had fallen apart at the seams; I’d cried and screamed after him, begging him to come back, but my words went unheard. I was still no closer to finding him now than I had been then.
The voice in my head piped up, “you had to do all this; you can’t leave any stone unturned and who would you get to help you anyway?” I thought about it hard; even if I hadn’t gone searching for him, they were still looking for me. I just needed to find Sam before they found me. I only knew one person who I might be able to call on for the type of help I needed, but I wasn’t sure how willing he would be. Lorcan seemed as though he could hold his own in a fight; I’d witnessed what he’d done to the creepy vamp in the club ‘The Wreak-Room’. Even though he said he’d been sent by my aunt, I still wasn’t too sure how well I could trust him. I’d just met him, after all.
Sliding in behind the wheel of my Corsa, I flipped down the driver’s mirror and stared at the person reflected back at me. I was almost unrecognisable; my skin was even more translucent than usual, I had purple smudges under my eyes and a nice big bruise blossoming on my right cheek. I wasn’t sure how I’d gotten that. I didn’t remember Graham hurting me but then, I was well and truly out of it in there. At least I would eventually remember everything that happened; not that I really wanted the memories, but it was always better to know.
I lifted the cloth away from my neck and gasped. It had stopped bleeding and I could see two small puncture wounds where he had sunk his fangs into me. I knew I’d be ok, but it still shocked me; at least I could feel myself beginning to heal. My gift allowed me to be a little bit hardier than other humans and I was happy to discover that I wasn’t so worn out that I couldn’t heal faster. I really didn’t want to have to take a trip to the hospital.
I turned on the engine and heat blasted out of the vents, filling the car. It was only then that I realised I was shivering. I must have lost more blood than I thought. The fact that my jeans were ripped at the knees and were allowing the cold Irish autumn air up and around my legs wasn’t helping much. I peered out the window at the bright sunshine, the only thing that was keeping me alive right now, and shivered again. Come nightfall, Graham wouldn’t be the only thing hunting me and I needed to be ready.
As I pulled the car out onto the road, I remembered Graham’s glee as he’d pulled me under with his gaze and taken me in his cold embrace. He’d roughed me up a bit, slapping and punching. I could remember the excited quickening of his breath as he toyed with me like a twisted game of cat and mouse; except I let him do it all to me, even enjoyed it because he held me in his control. It excited him to beat his prey. He enjoyed the sound of their pulse thundering in his ears and mouth as he sunk his fangs into them; he loved watching the marks and bruises blossom over their skin. Graham made me sick. I knew I’d have nightmares about his other games and victims whenever I got to sleep.
I shouldn’t have been able to read his memories like that. It confused me; I had never been properly bitten by a vampire before and Sam had never mentioned to me whether a bite could induce this kind of memory share. If this was another new aspect to my gift, I wasn’t sure I really wanted anything to do with it. I had always found it easy to read people, instinctively knowing whether they were truly good or bad, and vampires were the same. I knew a good one when I felt him – it was how I had known what Sam was – but I had never experienced anything like this and it frightened me. I shuddered at some of the images that Graham had filled my head with and gripped the steering wheel tighter as I tried to concentrate only on the road ahead of me.
After making it back to the flat at a much slower pace than normal, I showered and bandaged up the worst of my injuries. I tried to shuffle once more through what Graham had told me. I realised now he’d been a little too careless with how much he had shared with me, believing that it wouldn’t matter what he told me because he was going to kill me. I had seen that in his mind clearly enough. The thoughts flitted around my mind like elusive butterflies; I needed to concentrate to sort out the jumble. After a vampire pulls you under with their eyes, it tends to fry your short-term memory a little bit. If I could concentrate hard enough, I would remember most of what he’d said.
I sat down on the edge of my sofa and closed my eyes. I pushed the images of Graham’s last screaming and bleeding victim from my mind; if I didn’t know better, I’d have said he was a psychopath before he became a vampire. The images were so violent and vivid and didn’t want to leave my mind, but then an image of Sam smiling filled my head and I set to my task with renewed vigour. I grabbed at the first thought I had stolen from his head. What was the word that he had thought so hard about…? I screwed my eyes up tight and remembered. My eyes flew open; I was the key to some great vampiric prophecy or curse. I still wasn’t too clear on the details, but what I did know was that the vampires thought if I was turned, I would become their dark queen. Sam had known and had tried to protect me from them by trying to kill himself. Sam was the connection to me. Graham’s mind had held thoughts of smug victory; he had found me where the council had failed but he knew that the council was trying to find a way to connect with me through Sam. Our love was like a paper trail that they were desperately trying to follow to the end, and our love endangered us both so much. That’s why he hadn’t wanted me to look for him. He was hoping he would be dead, and with him the council’s only hope of finding me. But I knew he wasn’t dead. With my visions of his torture and the dream in which I’d healed him, I knew he couldn’t possibly be dead; I’d have felt it.
Looking at it in perspective now, the connection between us had grown so strong; I’d probably have died myself. Our connection was too strong to survive a love lost like that. Sam, My Sam; all the memories I had of him made up like jigsaw puzzles in my mind. Feeling them hurt like a gaping wound in my chest. But I still had to remember. It was a comfort as well as a torture; memories like the first time we’d met. I had always been interested in vampires; they were outsiders like me. I thought they were beautiful even if some of them did horrible things, but I always felt a strange pull towards some of
them. Not the types like Graham but I believe with every species you have good and bad; humans and animals are no exception and I was drawn to the good.
I remembered standing in the bar that night and meeting Sam for the first time. I was waiting for Annie to arrive. She was always late and that night was no exception. We’d been friends since we met in college, both studying English in UCC. She was the only one I’d ever trusted enough to tell my secret to and that was the night I’d saved her from an overzealous boy she knew; she wasn’t interested in him, but he was interested in her. We’d become best friends ever since then.
Standing at the bar twiddling a strand of my long dark brown hair, a nervous habit of mine which used to drive my mother crazy; she said I would ruin my hair. I felt him arrive in the bar. Smoothing down the front of my grey shift dress, I scanned the crowd for the vampire. The hairs on my neck alerted me to his presence. As I turned my head, my blue eyes picked out the most gorgeous man I’d ever laid eyes on. Staring at him, his green eyes caught my blue ones and I was lost. It felt like I was falling forwards into his eyes and it wasn’t until I felt a pair of strong arms wrap around me and cradle me to their chest that I realised I had fallen. Apologising profusely to whoever I had fallen on, I searched for my green eyed vamp but I failed to find the angel who had literally bowled me over. The hairs on my neck were still standing but the disappointment I felt that I couldn’t find him almost knocked me down for a second time.
But more than this, I felt an irrational sense of disappointment that he didn’t take any notice of the girl he had literally knocked over with one glance. I felt a blush creeping up my neck as the humiliation set in. I have been told that I am pretty; five-foot six, long dark chocolate hair, very pale skin and big blue eyes. I’m not athletic; I have a pretty average build. And obviously I was too average for him, I thought. I caught a piece of my hair and began twiddling it as I pulled out of my rescuers embrace. I turned to thank him properly this time and was caught once again by those beautiful green eyes, but this time they were just eyes with gold flecks spinning ceaselessly around the pupil. He was beautiful. The realisation struck me then that he had caught me, but how had he done that when I had been looking at him? How did he move that fast? The thought made me dizzy. I put my hand out to steady myself and found his hand closing around mine.
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