by Lexi Blake
It was one thing to read about it in a book, a completely different thing to be here.
She didn’t belong here.
“That’s Teresa,” Ariel explained with a wave of her hand. “She’s playing around with a couple of the lads. Sasha is trying to get passed to use the four footer without supervision and T is letting him practice on her. She’s a pain slut so it’s all cool. Trust me, we’ll all get to see her welts tomorrow. She’ll show ’em off.”
Welts? She wasn’t really into pain. Maybe she was going to run.
And then she saw him.
Nick strode down one of the paths, and she realized that there were things in life she wanted more than her own dignity. Or her female parts took over, and they weren’t as afraid of pain as the rest of her was.
He wore a dark suit, perfectly pressed, with a snowy white shirt and a deep red tie. The suit fit like it had been made for him, and it probably had. He wore expensive-looking dress shoes and gold gleamed at his cuffs. His hair was slicked back, showing off the glorious angles of his face. He looked like an incredibly hot mobster. Or a spy.
Or the man of her stupid, never-ending, optimistic dreams.
She forced herself to start thinking again with her brain. He wasn’t dressed like the other men. They were all in fet wear of some kind. Kayla had explained that the Dominant aligning males would be in leather pants and vests and submissive men in much, much less. But fet wear was required in The Garden.
Were they leaving? Had he decided to do something else with his evening? Or had he come to the rational conclusion that she wasn’t built for this world? He might have changed because he’d finally figured out she wasn’t very sexual and now he would do something like offer to have dinner with her to kindly let her down.
Or something had happened. He looked ready for work.
Why did he have to look so sexy when he was working? And why the hell had she thought a dowdy college professor could keep his attention? He was a dangerous man, a man of action. He would be bored in her world.
He would get bored with her.
He hadn’t seen her yet. She still had some time. Maybe dignity was going to win out. “I think I should go change. Tell him I’ll be out in a minute.”
“Why would you change?” Kayla asked. She looked around and then waved Nick’s way. “Hey, hot stuff, we’re over here. Damn, you look good, buddy. Why don’t you dress like that all the time?”
His lips curled up and she watched his eyes find her. “Because I would not wish to distract all the lovely ladies. How would you ever get any work done when I look like this? I only wish to distract one lady. This is for her.”
Yep, there was the breathing problem again. He sucked all the air out of her lungs and at the same time made her mouth water.
She was so out of her league. “Should I go change?”
“Why would you change when you look so beautiful?” Nick reached out a hand to Ariel, who allowed him to bring it gallantly to his lips. He did the same with Kayla. “Ladies, you grace us all with your beauty. I thank you for helping my dushka into her beautiful clothes. She is as lovely as I imagined.”
“You’re welcome, Sir,” Ariel said with a smile on her face.
Kayla gave him a little curtsy. “Always happy to help, Master Nikolai. But you should know, she’s a nervous nelly tonight. I think the sound of the whip is disturbing her.”
“It’s fine. I’m okay with it.” She proved her own words false as she winced when a loud crack emanated from deeper in the dungeon.
Ariel put a hand on her shoulder. “She might need to talk more, Sir. If you like, I can get changed and have a sit-down with her.”
“That’s sweet of you,” he said, giving her a warm smile. “But it’s not necessary. We’re going to play privately tonight. I’ve set up an exhibition for her to watch. If she’s comfortable with that, perhaps we can walk the dungeon tomorrow night. I’ll keep her all to myself this evening, but I thank you for being concerned.”
Ariel bowed her head. “Then she’s in good hands.” She looked back up and gave Kayla a wink. “Let’s go cause some trouble. I promised Penny we would meet her in the lounge for a drink after we’ve all had our fun.”
Kayla waved as she walked away with Ariel, leaving her all alone with the most beautiful man in the world.
“I’m trying to get used to it.” She started to talk almost faster than her brain worked. “But maybe it’s too much for me. I don’t understand everything. You were different with Kayla than you usually are. They were different the minute you walked over here. And why are you dressed like that? I was told fet wear only. I would rather be in my jeans.”
His hand came out, tilting her head up. “In here, we’re not coworkers and the dynamic is different. In this place, they’re submissives and they will be given all the respect and honor they’re due. All submissives are beautiful here. They’re accepted and honored for their service. They honored me for my service as a Dominant partner even though we’ve never once played together. They were kind to you and that earns my gratitude because you’re important to me. I’m dressed like this because I think you’ll respond to me like this. Authority doesn’t come from a set of leathers. Arousal isn’t assured because I’m wearing fet wear. Tell me something. Do you find me attractive like this? Do I seem powerful to you? In control?”
She looked at him, really looked at him. He used the words authority and control. What did they mean to her? Nick in a perfectly tailored suit looked like her every professor fantasy come to life. Those professors had been a sanctuary to a girl who’d moved at least twice a year and globetrotted during the summers. They’d been logic and surety in a world where nothing made sense.
She found Nick sexy on every level, but dressed like this was something different. It called to her on a base level. It was everything she wanted in a man. Cool. Calm. Collected.
In control.
“You look amazing and yes, something about you dressed like that calls to me.”
His hand moved up, cupping her cheek. “Everyone’s needs are different. I intend to fill yours. Do you trust me?”
Such a dangerous question but there was only one answer. “Yes.”
“Then come with me and trust me to see to your pleasure. There’s nothing for you to worry about tonight but pleasing me. You will follow my directions and obey me. If you get scared or find something distasteful, you will tell me and we’ll stop and discuss it. There will be no real discipline tonight, though I will have tasks for you to perform. Everything I ask of you is to create intimacy between us, to build the foundation of a relationship. Can you promise to be honest with me? I don’t want lies to please me. I want honesty.”
“I honestly hate this corset.”
His lips curled up. “That wasn’t a no. That was a plea to get naked as soon as we’re alone.”
The deep timbre of his voice was working its magic. “I can do that, Sir.”
His hand fell away from her face, finding her own and tangling their fingers together. “Excellent. Then I think it’s time we began.”
Her heart pounded as she followed him down the path, toward whatever came next.
Chapter Ten
Hayley walked through the door Nick held open for her. “So we’re going to be alone for the evening.”
“Yes and no,” he replied enigmatically.
He seemed determined to keep her on edge, but she couldn’t force herself to turn back. She’d had that moment when insecurity had taken over, but now she discovered curiosity was far more pressing. She wanted…no…she needed to see where he was going to take her this evening. It was more than how hot he looked. It was about the press of his hand in hers, the warmth he imparted. It was about the way his shoulders had straightened as he’d walked her through the dungeon. As though he was proud to be there with her.
It suddenly didn’t seem so bad to be wearing a lung-strangling corset as long as she was here with him. She’d even gotten a glimpse of
Teresa on one of the X thingees. Her backside had red stripes on it, but she’d seemed relaxed.
Things were not always as they seemed. That was what she kept telling herself.
She stepped into the room with its low lighting and realized it was something of a bedroom. There was a bed in the back of the room covered with lush bedding. There were two nightstands and a plethora of plush pillows.
The night was looking up. Some straight-on sex might be happening in this room.
She turned and realized what he’d meant when he’d told her yes and no to the question were they alone. One side of the room was a massive window that looked into another room. She found herself in a decadent bedroom that stared right into another one. And it wasn’t empty.
She stopped and stared as she watched Charlotte Taggart step into the center of the room completely naked.
That was a sight even a straight chick couldn’t turn away from. Charlotte found a place on the carpet and sank gracefully down to her knees. Her strawberry blonde hair flowed around her gorgeous torso, curling around her nipples. She had beautiful breasts. Round and full and luscious, they led down to an hourglass waist and full hips. She was a fertility goddess complete with stretch marks that strangely did nothing to detract from her beauty. If Hayley looked at her objectively, Charlotte was slightly too large to be considered perfect, her breasts sagging a bit, fine lines around her eyes.
She was beautiful in a way commercial actresses with no flaws couldn’t possibly be.
She was beautiful in a way Hayley could be. She was beautiful in a way no computer could perfect, no amount of lighting could make. That beauty was lit from the inside of Charlotte Taggart. It was love and confidence and life.
“Tell me what you’re thinking.”
He was behind her but not touching her yet, as though her answer would decide what he did next.
“She’s lovely and amazing.” Should it bother her? Should she not find another woman pretty? “I’m not aroused by her, but I am inspired. I wish I had her confidence.”
The door behind Charlotte opened and her husband walked in, wearing his leathers. They looked right on him somehow. The same way the suit looked perfect on Nick.
Because they were different and yet the same. That was what Nick was trying to tell her. She could still be her. They could be them and still belong in this lifestyle.
“Do they know we’re watching them?”
Ian Taggart stepped behind his wife, placing one big hand on her head. His whole body relaxed as though he needed the connection to her to be complete.
Nick moved beside Hayley, close but not touching. “Oh, yes. Ian knows who’s watching. I set up this scene with him. Charlotte has only been told that another couple is watching. She can’t see us. From her vantage point this window appears to be a large mirror. Exhibitionism is one of her kinks. She enjoys the idea that strangers are watching her, likely getting off while they do.”
Taggart stroked his wife’s hair, saying something to her.
“There’s no sound?”
“I’ve left it off. I would prefer that you listen only to my voice. This is exploration, Hayley. The sex you’ve had up to this point has been mostly vanilla, and there’s nothing wrong with that. If you would prefer, we can leave here and go back to my flat and get into bed.”
She couldn’t take her eyes off the couple in front of them. Taggart was saying something to his wife as he ran his hands over her body. Hayley watched the way Charlotte’s nipples hardened, her skin flushing to a rosy pink. Whatever he was saying, she liked it.
Was it wrong to watch them if they liked to be watched?
“Would vanilla sex give you what you need?” It was odd to be standing next to him, the space between them electric with tension while they both stared straight ahead. Taggart had moved to the side of the room where there was a table with a number of items laid out. He selected a length of rope, pulling on it as though testing its strength.
“I can be content.”
Contentment wasn’t satisfaction. “But you need more.”
He finally turned, placing a hand on her arm. “Hayley, it doesn’t matter what I need if it doesn’t please you as well. You’re under the mistaken impression that the pleasure I derive has something to do with force. That’s not true at all. I’ll only enjoy the control if it’s given with joy. I don’t wish to stand above you and know I conquered by strength. I want you to enjoy what I do to you, to crave it. I want to train your body to accept the pleasure I can give it. Tell me. Does the thought of giving me control arouse you?”
“Yes, and I’m afraid of the impulse.”
“Because so much of your life was spent out of control.” He took a step back, easing out of the suit coat. “You moved around and your father was in and out of your life. I understand that. You need control and stability in your daily life. This is a different place. You saw how Ariel changed when she put on fet wear. She’s a powerful, intelligent woman who does amazing work. There is nothing submissive about her or Kayla in their daily lives. This is how they relax. They find partners who can allow them to submit, partners whose needs dovetail with their own. Look at Charlotte.”
Hayley turned away from the delicious sight of Nick, who looked lean and predatory in the dress shirt, tie, vest, and slacks. She looked back to the window and saw Charlotte had changed positions. She was still on her knees, but instead of her hands on her thighs, they were now over her head, the hands together and her breasts outthrust as her husband wound the rope around her torso.
“Why do you think she allows her husband to bind her like this?”
The answer was right there on Charlotte’s face, and Hayley suddenly understood the point of this lesson. If she’d been asked the question without watching how peaceful and calm Charlotte appeared, Hayley likely would have said that Charlotte did it to please her husband. “She enjoys it. She enjoys giving over to him.”
“Again, she’s a powerful woman. She runs a powerful company. Ian leaves much of the day-to-day work to his wife. He doesn’t see her as submissive outside of play. Not that there would be anything wrong with it. I know lovely women and men who choose to submit freely to their partners outside the bedroom. It’s all about what works for the Dom and the sub. Is the scene in front of you arousing in any way?”
“Yes. It’s very arousing.”
“What is it doing to your body? Tell me. I like hearing the words from your mouth.”
It seemed such an awkward thing to talk about, but then she was staring at a woman she knew, was becoming friends with, being tied up by her husband. “I’m feeling warm.”
“Where?” He was so close, but he didn’t touch her. He moved behind her. “Where do you feel warm, dushka?”
The sight in front of her wasn’t the only thing arousing. His voice had gone to that rich, deep place where he no longer worried about the thickness of his accent. “All over my body.”
His hands found her shoulders and he brushed her hair to one side. “That’s not enough. I want to know where it affects you. Is it here?”
She shivered as he ran his nose along the shell of her ear. She could feel the heat of his breath, hear him breathing in her scent. In front of her, she could see Taggart’s plan playing out. He wound the rope around and around, leaving his wife’s breasts out, surrounded and supported by his ropes. On display for his eyes. Left vulnerable to his touch, to the play of his tongue and teeth, the tweak of his fingers.
“It’s everywhere, Nicky. My breasts feel heavy. I can feel my nipples puckering.”
He moved lower, his nose running over her neck. Somehow that trace of a touch sent an erotic shiver through her, a promise of things to come. “Where else?”
He knew where else, but he seemed determined to make her say it. To make her comfortable with the words, with her body. With him.
“I feel it deep inside. My pussy.” That was probably the word he wanted and it didn’t seem so awkward all of a sudden. For the first
time that part of herself did feel like a pussy, a twitching, aching, needy pussy. “I’m getting wet. It feels good. It’s been a long time since I got wet by watching someone or thinking about someone.”
“What did you watch that made you hot?”
“Porn. When I have a couple of glasses of wine and I’m lonely, sometimes I’ll go to one of those sites on the web.” She didn’t mention that she always looked for a dark-haired man, one she could think of as Nick.
“I like that. We could watch some together one night. I would enjoy sharing that with you.” His fingertips brushed along her arms. “Who do you think about? You said sometimes you got wet thinking about someone. Was it your fiancé?”
She stiffened up. She hadn’t exactly talked to him about the horrific mistake she’d made. “No, it wasn’t him.”
“Relax.” Warm hands cupped her shoulders. “I was asking, not demanding. If you don’t want to talk about him, we don’t have to. I want to make sure you understand that you’re safe with me. You will always be safe with me.”
He didn’t have to tell her that. She knew. Nick was an honorable man, the most honorable she’d ever met. He wouldn’t hurt her. Not physically. She forced herself to relax, to watch the Taggarts’ scene. It was trust and lust rolled up and played out in front of her.
“You know it’s you, Nicky. Even when I had a boyfriend, it was always you in the back of my mind. I would close my eyes and see you.” It was why every relationship was doomed from the start. No man could live up to him. Even after he’d broken her heart, she’d never truly let go of him. Never. She hoped this time she could.
“I think about you as well.” He moved back. “I want you to tell me something. In all those fantasies of me, did you ever once see yourself in control?”
The truth flashed through her. A hundred fantasies she’d played out in her head over the years. Him coming back and begging her for forgiveness. Him telling her how much he needed her. Him saying he loved her.
But when it came time for the fantasy to move to sex, not once had she been in control. It was always Nick commanding, demanding.