by Astor, Marie
“So when are you leaving?” Maggie could tell that her mother was doing her best to suppress the emotion in her voice.
“At the end of next week,” Maggie said quietly. “I know it’s very sudden,” she added, aware of the enormity of the news she had just unleashed on her family, “but I’ll come to visit soon.”
“Then you have a lot of packing to do,” her mother said brightly.
They spent the next hour discussing the details of Maggie’s move to Eagleville. Maggie decided that for now she would only take the most necessary things: her photography equipment and only some of her clothes, leaving the rest of her possessions to be picked up at a later date when she and Taylor would come back to visit.
It was late afternoon when Maggie went up to her room. As much as she had enjoyed spending time with her parents, it felt good to have a moment to herself. Incredible changes had taken place in her life over the past few weeks, with even greater changes to come, and now, she longed for a moment of solitude and quiet to think things over.
While she was eager to embark on her new life, she was also acutely aware of how different her life would become. She knew full well that she was taking a huge leap of faith by moving to Eagleville in order to be together with Taylor: a decision that many would think disastrously impulsive, but Maggie knew that it was not so.
She had fallen for Taylor head over heels: his tall, muscular physique together with his handsome face and piercing green eyes made him irresistible, but there was so much more to him than his dashing looks. It was Taylor’s spirit that she fell in love with: his unwavering desire to live life to the fullest and his resolute determination to pursue his dreams even if that meant going against the will of those close to him, including his father. Of course, she did not approve of Taylor’s rift with his father and hoped that they would eventually reconcile; nonetheless, she could not help admiring Taylor’s determination to lead the life of his own choosing.
Maggie checked her cell phone in case Taylor might have called, but did not see any missed calls. She yearned to hear his voice, but resisted the urge to call him – she knew that he needed to be focused on his skiing, and she did not want to upset his concentration.
They had been apart for less than two days, and already it felt like an eternity. She longed for the touch of Taylor’s powerful, tender hands, the sensation of his lips closing hungrily upon hers, the feel of his taut, muscular body pressing against hers.
She had mistakenly packed one of Taylor’s sweaters into her bag, and now, she burrowed her face into it, losing herself in the faint smell that lingered in the fabric: a mixture of his cologne and his own smell. Maggie wrapped Taylor’s sweater around her shoulders, curling up into the softness of the armchair: she knew that she would see Taylor soon, but right now, the wait seemed like an eternity.
Chapter 28
Taylor woke up at dawn. He had gone to bed early and slept all the way through the night. He got up and started to get ready: today was the day he was going to ski the Needle Eye – the day he had been waiting for all his life. He knew that hundreds of people would be watching his descent and thousands more would see it later on tape, but he also knew that in order to succeed he had to put these thoughts aside, just as he had, for the time being, put aside his thoughts of Maggie.
He remembered his grandfather’s words from the night before: I know it’s hard, but you must tune out the noise, Taylor. Focus on only those things that matter. You are doing this for yourself, and only you can make it happen. His grandfather’s eyes shone with pride as he spoke, and Taylor knew that Phil was pleased beyond words to see his grandson take up his mantle: to know that his legacy would not vanish, but would be carried on. But he also knew that his grandfather was nervous about the descent since he had experienced the perils of the couloir firsthand. Over the years, Phil had tried to convince Taylor to abandon this pursuit, but seeing his grandson’s growing skill and understanding of the mountains, he relented, realizing that skiing the Needle Eye was something that Taylor needed to do for himself - a passage that he needed to cross, just like Phil had crossed it in his own youth. Taylor was pleased to know that his grandfather understood him so well: the bond that they shared required no words.
There were times when Taylor wished he shared the same bond with his father, but alas, some things could not be changed. Deep down he had hoped that his father would be there to witness the feat he was about to undertake, but even though he had told him about the planned descent of the Needle Eye, his father did not deem the event worthy of his visit. However, now was not the time to dwell on such things, and Taylor pushed the unwelcome thought away from his mind.
Soon, it would be time to meet with the film crew. Yesterday, when they were filming simpler runs, Ryan had followed Taylor on the trails, but today, Taylor would be going alone, and his descent would be filmed from the helicopter.
Taylor spent the next hour checking his equipment: making sure that the edges of his skis were sharp enough and that the bindings were properly calibrated. He had been tuning his own equipment ever since he could remember, and it had become second nature to him, but this morning, he was especially careful.
When Taylor parked his car at the ski base, he saw that Ryan had already arrived. Ryan was waiting for Taylor outside, together with his assistant, Dan Cooper, and the helicopter pilot, Jim McNulty.
“So, today is the day, huh?” Ryan shook hands with Taylor.
Taylor nodded, pretending not to notice the tension in Ryan’s voice.
“Well, it certainly looks like a good day for a helicopter ride,” said Jim, taking a wistful look at the sky.
“Taylor, are you sure you want to go ahead with this?” Ryan frowned. “You know, it’s not too late to scrap the whole thing,” he added awkwardly. “If I had known things would turn out this way, I would have never let Jeffrey anywhere near this project. I always knew he was an arrogant prick, but I did not know that he was a cheap bastard to boot.” Ryan paused, his thick-gloved hands clenching into fists. “I don’t think he even realizes that he’s putting people in danger. For Christ’s sake, we kept shooting until dusk yesterday, and today, the schedule is just as jam-packed – it can’t go on like this!”
“Take it easy, Ryan. We’ve come this far – it’s too late to turn back now.” Taylor put his hand on Ryan’s shoulder. “We can’t afford to waste our energy on anger. I’ve waited for this moment for a long time, and I won’t let Jeffrey ruin it for me. Let’s take it one step at a time: today I am going to ski the Needle Eye, and then we’ll worry about the rest of the film.”
“So you’re sure you want to go through with it? ‘Cause we could always look for another producer.”
“Yes.” Taylor nodded. “I’ve been gearing up for this descent the entire winter, and I’ve never felt more ready. The conditions won’t get better than this: the past couple of days it’s been snowing like crazy and there’s been no wind. Now is the time to do it.”
“That’s the spirit.” Jim grunted. “You sure got guts kid.”
“Good luck, man. I know you’re gonna rip that thing.” Dan clapped Taylor on the shoulder.
“It’s settled then.” The tense expression on Ryan’s face relaxed a bit, and a semblance of a smile appeared on his lips. “Now let’s go through everything one more time to make sure there won’t be any surprises.”
The four of them talked through the sequence of Taylor’s descent, going over every detail. The air tram did not go as high as the pinnacle of the Needle Eye, and Taylor would have to jump from the helicopter since the peak of the couloir was too narrow even for an ace like Jim to land a helicopter. Afterwards, Taylor would wait for Jim’s signal: a loop, which would mean that Ryan was ready to begin shooting, and then Taylor would begin his descent.
The roaring of the propeller blasting over him, Taylor climbed into the helicopter, taking care to duck beneath the oscillating propeller blades. The loud, raging noise had become routine to him, and he
smiled, briefly remembering his alarm during his first helicopter ride: he was ten years old at the time, and his grandfather thought he would enjoy a helicopter ride. It was then that Taylor had first witnessed the Needle Eye in all its glory: he had heard its description countless times and had glimpsed a distant outline of the couloir from the ground, but when faced with its vastness from the vantage point of a helicopter, the view was completely different. Seeing the couloir up-close was awe-inspiring, but it was also eye opening for at that moment, as young as he was, Taylor became certain that one day he would ski the Needle Eye. Since then, many things had changed: he had become a man, but his determination to realize his dream had remained steadfast. And now, he would finally fulfill it. Taylor smiled to himself thinking that not too many people got to see their childhood dreams come true: most abandoned them in exchange for comfort and security as they settled into lives of convention and boredom, content to occupy the molds that they were expected to fill by their family and friends, but not him, and at that moment, Taylor knew that his unwavering determination had been worth it.
Through the helicopter window Taylor saw that they were approaching the couloir: in the rays of the morning sun, veiled in a coat of fresh snow, the Needle Eye looked even more majestic than usual.
Taylor took a deep breath in preparation for the jump: he was not nervous or scared, but neither was he complacent. His entire being was focused on the couloir: the sharp edges of its snakelike groove, the almost vertical incline of its pinnacle, the errant rocks that riddled its domain. Every turn, every move would count.
Jim maneuvered the helicopter to the very pinnacle of the couloir, getting as close as he could to the narrow ledge at the very of peak the mountain.
“This is the closest I can get, Taylor. Good luck out there.” Jim called over his shoulder.
“Good luck, Taylor.” Ryan’s face was somber, but his eyes were full of admiration.
“Thanks, guys.” Taylor’s face was filled with concentration as he prepared to dismount from the helicopter.
Despite it being a sunny morning, a few white clouds lingered in the sky, and as he stood on the summit of the Needle Eye with wind ringing in his ears, Taylor found himself surrounded by a veil of misty fog. He took a moment to admire the majestic view that unfolded before him: even though he had been skiing in Eagleville all his life, he had never seen a view like this before. He felt himself grow stronger, emboldened by the grandeur that surrounded him. At that moment, he knew that he was living a life that was worth living: what greater pursuit could one find than the one that he was about to undertake?
Taylor looked up and watched the helicopter hover in the sky, waiting for Jim’s signal. When he saw the helicopter make a loop, Taylor began his descent.
The pinnacle was especially tricky. As he navigated his way down an almost fifty degree incline, Taylor could feel the pull of gravity threatening to tip him over into the abyss that yawned beneath him. This was a no-fall zone. One wrong move and all would be lost. Every fiber of his being was sensing, observing, tensing, as Taylor made life and death decisions over and over again. Controlling every twitch of his taut leg muscles, he pressed on in a series of tightly wound turns that looked almost like jumps.
Taylor was two quarters of the way through - the steepest part was behind him. He took a brief pause to catch his breath. The incline was more merciful here, and the tenseness in his legs relented. From where he stood, Taylor could catch a glimpse of the crowd that had gathered on the viewing platform to witness his descent. He thought he heard cheering cries, but tuned them out as he turned away to face the couloir – he could not afford to be distracted.
All the extraneous noises had become obscured: the rustling noise of the helicopter, the cheering crowd - nothing but the couloir existed, as Taylor could only hear the sound of his own breath and his beating heart. In many ways, he had grown to think of the couloir as a living, breathing thing: it too had its moods and desires, and one had to be careful to not go against them. Today, the Needle Eye had accepted him as his guest, and Taylor was grateful for this hospitality.
Despite the deceptive layer of snow, Taylor knew that the next section of the couloir contained a gash that was several feet wide – he had seen it many times from a helicopter, and he would have to keep all the way to the left side of the incline to avoid it. He took a deep breath, preparing for his maneuver: veering on the very edge of the mountain’s shoulder, Taylor cut into his first turn. He was skiing in a space of only a few feet, aware that the slightest slip would send him tipping off the cliff. A few more sharp turns, and he would be out of the woods.
Taylor exhaled with relief – he had made it through. The couloir widened at the end, and Taylor began gathering speed. A flurry of snowflakes brushed against his face: it was getting windier, and he smiled, thinking that he had picked the perfect time to ski the Needle Eye – in a few days, all the freshly fallen snow would be blown away.
He was going very fast now, eager to get to the end of his journey. There was a soft, rustling noise behind him: it was only a whisper, a sliver of a movement. Out of the corner of his eye, Taylor could see wispy shavings of snow gathering into tiny heaps, trailing after him - they were too slow to reach him and too light to present any danger. It pleased him to ski in the company of this miniature avalanche - as he made his way down the slope, a current of powdery snow followed after him, about to catch up with him, but each time, Taylor would maneuver out of its reach.
When Taylor reached the base of the couloir, his heart raced triumphantly at the realization that his lifelong dream had finally come true. He could hear the spectators cheer him, and this time, he allowed himself to enjoy their accolades, but no praise could be sweeter than his own satisfaction. He had done what was said to be impossible, and he had preserved his grandfather’s legacy.
“I’m so proud of you.” Phil Ratran was waiting for his grandson by the air tram.
Shawn and Hannah were also there and they too joined in with their congratulations.
“I was only able to do it because of everything that you taught me.” Taylor looked at his grandfather with gratitude. “Now, no one will ever doubt that it is possible to ski the Needle Eye.”
Phil Ratran nodded, his eyes shining with pride. “But most importantly, Taylor, you know that now.”
“I never doubted it.”
“But now, you’ve experienced it for yourself.”
Taylor nodded, knowing exactly what his grandfather meant: while defending his grandfather’s legacy was a big part of it, the main reason that drove Taylor to ski the couloir was his desire to obliterate the boundaries of the impossible. He had pushed through yet another frontier, proving that human determination could make anything possible.
Chapter 29
Maggie woke up from the sound of her own voice in the middle of the night: she had been having a nightmare, and her skin was damp with cold sweat. She shivered: the panic that had ensnared her in the dream was still clinging to her as though the nightmare had somehow managed to seep into reality.
The dream started with her standing on the edge of an incredibly steep mountain. Everywhere, there was endless snow, reaching up into the cloud-covered sky so that it became impossible to tell where the snow ended and the clouds began. Maggie looked down at her feet, wondering how it was possible for her to stand without sinking into the snow and then realized that her feet were not touching the surface, but were floating above the ground. This was not the pleasant floating sensation she had experienced in her childhood dreams; instead, she felt helpless and trapped in the forced levitation.
She kicked her feet, desperate to get back on the ground, but no matter how much she struggled, she only seemed to lift up higher. There was a sliver of movement - a lone figure in the white stillness. Maggie strained her eyes, her heart lurching as she recognized Taylor. She had to get to him fast. She called out his name, but words were sticking to her tongue as they often do in dreams, and she was r
endered speechless, mouthing silent cries. For a moment, Taylor looked up, giving Maggie a glimmer of hope: surely he would see her, he had to see her. But he seemed to look right through her, as he stared at the whiteness of the clouds. Then, she saw him get closer towards the edge of the mountain, preparing for a descent.
“Taylor! No! The snow is too deep – you will sink right into it!” Maggie was overcome with dread and fear, knowing that she had to stop him. “No! Turn back! Stop!” she struggled to scream, but her words were stuck in the back of her throat, her voice no longer hers to command. Tears rolled down her face, as she choked sobbing, cursing her helplessness. Something terrible was about to happen, and she could not do anything to stop it.
Screaming at the top of her lungs, but failing to a make a single sound, she watched helplessly as Taylor plunged down the mountain. For a moment she harbored a glimmer of hope as she saw him navigate the vast ocean of snow, his silhouette a mere speck on the infinite whiteness around him. The snow seemed to reach as far as his waist, but Taylor powered through it, making his way down the mountain.
He is almost halfway through. He is going to make it, she thought. It’s going to be all right.
Suddenly, a terrifying shudder rolled through the air. Maggie looked up, already knowing that everything was lost. A monstrous tide of snow unleashed itself from the mountaintop, rolling down with ferocious speed.
“Taylor, look up!” she screamed. “Go faster! You have to go faster!” Her throat felt as though it were full of splinters from all the shouting, the pain made even more poignant by her fruitless struggle to regain her voice.
With agonizing resignation Maggie watched the relentless tide crush everything in its way.