“On this day - August Sixth, 1945 - Almighty God has decreed that Heaven is to be vacated. He has lost all hope for mankind and from this day forth they are to be abandoned. If you are reading this do not despair, wait patiently, someone will come for you.”
Jarrod blinked. That was something of a surprise. Though it did explain the last seventy years! He heard someone or something behind him and turned. It was an angel, an archangel, dressed in white. Somehow he recognized him – Gabriel! Gabriel and Beelzebub had been the closest of friends before the Fall. Gabriel looked at him steadily, trying to size him up, and then spoke
“Beelzebub! You are the last one I ever expected to see here.” Jarrod shrugged, he motioned towards the plaque.
“Hiroshima?” Gabriel nodded.
“The middle ages, the witch trials, the Inquisition, the Nazis, the Holocaust, Stalin’s and Lenin’s mass purges were almost enough. But when they dropped an atomic bomb on three hundred thousand people we all knew immediately that it would be the first of many. It was the last straw. God wept quite openly. Any society that can do that or plan and prepare to do that – whatever their vain and hypocritical excuses –has instantly and permanently cut itself off from God’s grace and begun a rapid, rabid and irreversible descent into loud bombastic self righteous insanity. You’ve seen what’s just been happening. Satan himself had to intervene to stop them, the world is his now.”
Jarrod found Gabriel’s tone itself more than just a bit pompously self righteous. He objected
“But Satan started it, engineered it.” Gabriel replied unctuously
“They have free will.” Jarrod was furious at this reply but he wasn’t going to get drawn into that old and ridiculous argument. Instead, he pointed out
“And anyway Satan is dead now, gone.” Gabriel looked at him carefully
“Lucifer is dead. The next Satan.”
Jarrod stared back at him.
Gabriel was revealing nothing further. He stared back impassively. After some time he spoke again.
“You have a unique opportunity now, one that I would never have thought possible.” Jarrod had no idea what he was talking about, he asked, not without some suspicion
“And what’s that?” Gabriel continued
“You passed through the wall of fire. Being pure of heart, having put love for another before your self, you can come back with me now and be reunited with God.” He said this in a very condescending way. Jarrod was finding him increasingly unpleasant. He asked simply
“What about Cassandra?” Gabriel spoke
“She has been judged. You must not think of her again.” Jarrod was outraged
“What sort of justice is that? What sort of compassion? What, they fall out of the boat and it’s a case of fuck them; forget them, I’m OK. And while I’m on the subject how can he abandon billions of people into that accursed pit anyway– most of them for that matter not guilty of much, just stupidity - deluded and defrauded by a small minority of lying, thieving, power mongering assholes.” Gabriel continued to stare at him, looking stern
”God’s justice, God’s ways - are not to be questioned.” Jarrod was furious.
“Well, I’m questioning them. Widespread disease, plague, famine, poverty, ignorance, stupidity - earthquakes, hurricanes, fires, floods. The depravations of old age for the few who even make it that far. And he claims to love us! What would it be like if he didn’t? Everyone who anyone ever loves torn away from them by death. Suffering and pain the common lot of all and the capacity to gain just some glimpse of an understanding denied to anyone. Though there is no shortage of pompous priests of all persuasions pumping crap into people’s heads as fast as they are able. Is he up there just laughing at all of this? Consider a new born baby with a genetic disease, guilty of nothing, dying in its mothers arms, clinging to life, trying to scream as it gasps for its last breathe. Your God is either malevolent or incompetent and either way I spit on him.” Gabriel said nothing, he simply vanished. Jarrod called out after him
“Yeah, well, fuck you too.”
Without saying another word he turned around and set off on his return journey - back across the now shattered Plains of Anticipation and back down into the depths of Hell itself – to find and rescue his one true love. But even as he did so, a small doubt was beginning to form and a slowly growing fear that there was not going to be a happy ending – and never could have been.
Chapter 26 – Sudden Violent Death
Cassandra was walking home to her apartment in Walker Street. She was coming back after a shift at the House of Pain. She had been working there now for almost a year and was thoroughly sick of it. Most of the clients were harmless but every now and then ... And as for tonight! Well! That disgusting little pervert should be locked up. And someone should throw away the key. She was definitely going to quit. No amount of money was worth having to put up with nasty little shitheads like him. She crossed the bridge and made her way through the streets of North Sydney. It was after midnight but there were still a few people around. It was unusually quiet for a Saturday night. She looked about nervously – she’d caught several glimpses of the gnome earlier, watching her, following her. She hadn’t seen him for months and now for no apparent reason he was back. She knew instinctively that he represented a level of evil far beyond anything else she would ever encounter – at least in this life. She shuddered to recall how they had played together when she was a child. He had been her best friend, and now, what? Once again she found she couldn’t even remember his name. She tried harder but nothing came. She could never remember it and this in itself seemed very strange. It seemed to her to be desperately important – if she could just remember then she would be making a huge step towards finding out who he was and why he was following her.
Adrienne would be waiting at home. She’d taken the night off. Cassandra was unsure about her as well. She had become so pushy and so demanding. Nothing was the same since Marianne had been killed. Cassandra loved her and loved being with her up to a point, but maybe they should take a break for a while – live separately. She had a pretty good idea how Adrienne would react to that suggestion. Maybe just break up and be done with it. Do something, anything. She had to make some fundamental changes somehow. She missed being with a man. There was that extra something – it was hard to explain. Sure, almost all of them were assholes. But there had to be a decent one out there somewhere. She was flying to London in a week. She had a cousin in Brighton – one of her few surviving relatives. She had wanted to visit her for ages and now was a good time. She hadn’t visited her last year when they all went to Europe. She should have done it then. And now she would, she would get away from it all here – yes and from Adrienne too – and maybe she’d meet a good man in London. Stranger things had happened.
She heard a voice coming from straight in front of her – loud, obnoxious and very threatening.
“Well, well, look who we have here?” Looking up, she saw the same three men who had attacked her and Adrienne six months previously. They obviously recognized her. Once again they were drunk - drunk enough to be truly dangerous. Cassandra looked around. She’d turned into Walker Street. She couldn’t see anyone else. She cursed herself for walking home alone. This could be a real problem. Another one of the men, the tall stupid looking one, snarled at her
“Where’s your cunt girlfriend, cunt?” Cassandra didn’t answer and took a step back. They moved on her, quickly surrounding her. They grabbed her by the arms, one each side, then started walking – taking her along with them. She struggled but they were much stronger than her. One of them covered her mouth with his hand stopping her from screaming out. She tried to bite it but couldn’t quite manage.
They took her around the corner and then across the street to a small park – just a half block in size. There was no lighting in the park itself and it was quite dark with several large trees providing lots of cover. She thought
‘Oh no.’ She continued to struggle – but with
no effect. They took her into the park and behind the first large tree. They pushed her onto the ground. The tall stupid looking one took off his coat and stood over her. He spoke loudly to the other two
“Right, strip the bitch.” He started to take off his own clothes. The other two reached for Cassandra. She tried to scream out for help. One of them dropped down beside her and covered her mouth again. He held her tightly. She continued to struggle.
They all felt it. Something was there with them - something immensely evil. The men slowly turned towards it. Cassandra turned her head as best she could. There was a very large, very savage dog standing there, staring at them. It was a Doberman. It was growling at them. They could see its sleek jet black fur, its snarling face, razor sharp teeth and burning red, blood shot eyes - malevolence it its purest form. It looked like it had come straight up out of hell – and of course, it had. It was obviously intending to kill them and there was nothing they could do about it.
It jumped at the tall man standing over Cassandra, wrapping its jaws around his neck and tearing his throat out before he even hit the ground. The other two men screamed and tried to back away. They begged for mercy
“No, No, please, No, Don’t.” It advanced on them slowly and then jumped at them. There was a blur of movement, guttural roaring from the dog and shrieks of pain from the men which ended abruptly. It was all over in seconds.
Cassandra had managed to get to her feet. The dog walked back towards her and then sat down in front of her. For a moment she thought it was going to attack her too. Then she realized that it was there to protect her. She looked at it uncertainly. But she felt no fear. She was certain now, beyond all doubt, that she was involved in some dark plot and always had been. She looked up and sure enough there was the gnome standing only ten metres away, staring across at her. The doberman obviously belonged to him. Ignoring the fact that he had probably just saved her life, she was suddenly full of fire and fury. She rushed towards him and for the first time since childhood was standing directly in front of him. He watched her without expression. She screamed at him
“Why are you watching me? What do you want from me? You bastard! You fucking little bastard!” She reached for him – trying to grab his neck. But he simply vanished. She turned – the Doberman was gone also. She was left just standing there.
Chapter 27 – Purity of Purpose
Cassandra was stuck in Belial’s room unable to leave. She was dressed in a brief red skirt. Belial had returned earlier, manically pleased with how things had gone. He claimed that Lucifer and Beelzebub had been destroyed along with all of their forces, leaving him the undisputed master of Hell. He’d gone off with great excitement – making his way to the Great Hall to claim his place on the throne and assert his authority and dominance. He would be the new Satan. Cassandra didn’t believe that Jarrod was gone but there was nothing she could do. She found herself thinking about the gnome – her imaginary friend from childhood. She shuddered. He was so horrible. She tried again to remember his name. Then it came to her. At first she couldn’t believe it. She threw herself back on the bed – moaning out loud.
“Oh no, Oh no, it can’t be.” She remembered quite clearly now that the gnome had always called himself Beelzebub. She’d found the name amusing, not knowing what it meant. She still didn’t get it fully – but she knew Jarrod was involved somehow and that she’d always been part of his plan. She was devastated.
Jarrod came out of the portal back onto the Plains of Desolation a few miles from the city of Dis. The gnome was standing there waiting for him - the same twisted ugly little man he'd seen at Waterloo station and who had seemed so eerily and hauntingly familiar. He still did. Jarrod looked at him with great suspicion and hostility
"Who are you? What do you want?" The gnome stared back at him with a look of immense satisfaction. He had worked so hard for so long and success was finally at hand.
"I want you to take what is now yours, Master." Jarrod was still suspicious but also puzzled. It had all started to fit together somehow - he just couldn’t quite see it.
"And exactly how would I do that?" The gnome started speaking, quickly and intensely, enjoying himself.
"Master, you discovered the nature of God's Fist five hundred years ago in an ancient manuscript – written for the humans by one of the Nephilim. It told of automated defences you knew would be left on. Everything thing since then has centred on that. The Wall of Fire would not destroy the pure of heart. If you were still in human form and in love you would survive. The others, Lucifer especially, would be destroyed. It worked. Hell is now yours." Jarrod stared back at him. Simple, just like that - he knew it was true. He was starting to remember everything. He said out loud
"And now Heaven is empty as well. God has abandoned us ... abandoned them." The gnome was positively gleeful.
"You were sure that's what you would find, Master. So was Lucifer. That's how you convinced him to attack. This means the Earth is now yours as well - to do with as you please. Hell, Earth, Heaven - they're all yours."
Jarrod thought about it for a few moments. How astonishing! His whole life had been a lie, one huge self deception. Even as he realised this he felt the beginnings of that same strange force he’d felt earlier, faint but growing rapidly - a compulsion to change. He found he had to start fighting it and fighting hard, just to stay as he was. He said, simply and plaintively
"What about Cassandra?" The gnome continued with his explanation.
"I looked far and wide to find the only woman that you could ever love. You're Beelzebub, you don’t have much capacity for it. I guided events. I made sure that you met. It wasn’t easy. Some of the other Gods were trying to stop me. I disposed of a few poor choices. They were not right for you - and you knew it." Jarrod listened to all of this with growing dismay
"But I do love her." The gnome sneered.
"Jarrod loves her - that had to be real. But you're Beelzebub. Soon you'll be back to your old self. She'll be nothing but an unpleasant memory. I can have her stuffed if you want." Jarrod was angry at this.
"You will not harm her, ever." It occurred to him that the plot had a flaw. He could choose to remain as Jarrod and live on with Cassandra. Deal with Belial somehow. Escape somehow. But even as he thought this he knew how unlikely it was. The compulsion to change was growing stronger and more urgent. Increasingly he felt like he was just a persona in someone else's dream - struggling to stay in it, to stay as he was, and not wake up. He felt very weak and very confused.
The gnome watched all of this cautiously. He knew that there was a small danger of the wrong outcome - but not much. They had prepared very carefully. He delivered his final blow
"You love her but what in the world makes you think that she loves you?" Jarrod blinked
"What?" The gnome pushed on relentlessly.
"She's a player. She does what she needs to do. You were to be her protector down here. Now it's Belial. She was just using you." Jarrod answered quickly
"No, that's not true." But he seemed less than certain of himself. It was all very confusing. The gnome waved his arm and before them they could see a view of Belial's inner chambers. The gnome sneered again
"and yet even as we speak ..." Jarrod could see Belial and Cassandra on the bed together. Belial was on top of her fucking her vigorously. There was nothing pleasant about his manner. It was savage and violent. Cassandra didn’t seem to mind though. She responded enthusiastically - spreading her legs more widely and reaching up to try to kiss him - her face flushed with delight. Jarrod looked away. He was deeply hurt by this. He could barely think at first - he stared at the ground. The gnome watched him carefully. Of course the images were from the day before and he had altered Cassandra's response. In the original she had been disgusted and had resisted as best she could.
Jarrod was lost in thought and in sadness. He considered for the last time the absolute impossibility of love and the emptiness and futility of existence without it. He considered the b
rute fact that she had rejected him and chosen someone else. In the dream in Vienna, on the steps of the Concert Hall, he watched her walk off arm in arm with her chosen lover, laughing together, not looking back - leaving him standing there on the cold concrete forlorn and bereft, alone again, now and forever more. He watched her in the taxi driving off. He was still overwhelmed by her beauty and her brilliance. But he’d finally had enough, waited too long. It was all over. He said out loud, almost casually
“All right, that’s it then. Fuck it. I give up.” His aching heart finally broke. In the dream he raised the pistol to the side of his head, pulled the trigger and blew his own brains out. In an instant it really was all over. Jarrod himself was just the dream, rapidly fading and an old, old soul filled to the brim with a billion years of burning raging hatred finally woke up.
Beelzebub stood back up on his feet, stretched out and looked around - eyes blazing. He was alone, the gnome had vanished. He was exultant. He roared out
"It worked! It fucking worked!" He realised that of course the gnome had been merely an extension of himself, a projection, guiding events, ensuring the correct outcome, and had now been reabsorbed. He remembered that its existence had been shielded from Lucifer by Marduk. He remembered everything through the gnome's eyes - killing Adrianne, killing Elizabeth, killing Caroline, and all of the others. He had killed Marianne too – that one out of pure jealousy. He remembered watching over his ridiculous and pathetic life as Jarrod, trying to organise the first meeting in Amsterdam, opposed by the gods that were meant to be helping him, finally organising the meeting at Waterloo Station in London, setting the explosives that blew up the train, and above all watching Cassandra all of the time over her entire life. He saw the little trick just them with the images and was amused by it. He found himself increasing in height and bulk, musculature expanding – rapidly reverting to his true form. His skin and his face thickened and coarsened, changing in colour to a sickly gray. His eyes changed to a dark bloody red. His hair grew thicker and longer. His mind expanded rapidly also - quickly reaching levels of intelligence and malevolence far beyond human ken. He had never felt so powerful and so ferociously determined - and he liked it. He wanted more.
The Department of Hate - A Love Story Page 27