by Kelly Harper
Praise for Kelly Harper
Kelly you are a genius!
Denita Kee
OMG I couldn’t stop reading!
Amazon Reviewer
Kelly does it again. Another AMAZING book.
Sammie’s Blog
So sexy and hot. Kelly does not disappoint and the growth in her writing is impeccable.
Goodreads Reviewer
You can feel the emotions felt by each character through the authors writing. Would highly recommend.
Amazon Reviewer
You fee like you know each person and what they are feeling.
Amazon Reviewer
Easy and fast reading so it fits in to my busy lifestyle in that I can just pick it up and read a little here and there no matter what else is going on around me.
Amazon Reviewer
Kelly is becoming my favorite author and she seems to never disappoint anyone with her books! I didn't want to put the book down once I stared reading!
Amazon Reviewer
Not So Casual
Part 4
Kelly Harper
Copyright © 2018 by Kelly Harper
All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
Contents
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Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Epilogue
Sneak Peek: Take Me: Part 1
Sneak Peek: Black: Part 1
About the Author
Other Books by Kelly Harper
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Because happiness is important.
Chapter One
Collin stepped forward, reaching his hand out to her. Bre slapped it away. She couldn’t handle him touching her right then.
“What’s going on with you?” he asked, confused. “It’s not a big deal, it’s just a car show… I thought it would be nice.”
“Not everyone has the perfect little family like you, okay?”
Was he really so clueless about how good he had it? He had no idea what she would give to wake up on a Saturday morning and have her dad back in her life like Bill was in his. Just when she thought there was a guy that finally understood her, she found out she was totally wrong. Typical.
Collin sighed in frustration.
“Do you think he won’t like me? Am I too high-brow, or whatever? If that’s the case, just say so. I’m a man, I can handle it.”
“God, it doesn’t have anything to do with you!” she shouted. “It’s me! Okay? My dad doesn’t want anything to do with me!”
“What are you talking about?”
“He’s a drunk, Collin. He’s a drunk and he blames me for my mom leaving us.” Tears stung her eyes. “He hates me.”
Collin reeled, his back stiffening.
“I didn’t know…,” he said, his tone much softer than before.
“Of course you didn’t know. You go and try to make plans for me and you don’t even know anything about me.”
He shook his head.
“Forget the car show. We don’t have to go.”
Bre shook her head and let out a disbelieving laugh. She knew this was going to happen, but she’d been hoping she’d have more time with him before it did. Oh well. What was done was done. Might as well get it over with.
“Yeah, let’s forget the car show. In fact… let’s forget everything.”
Collin stared at her blankly, but Bre wasn’t going to wait around to give him a chance to respond. She needed to get out of there. She spun around and bee-lined for the elevator, hoping it was close to their floor. She needed to get as far away from Collin Hayes as possible.
“Bre, don’t leave like this!” he called after her.
She jammed her finger into the down button a few more times, hoping the elevator doors would magically open. No such luck.
“We both knew this was only temporary,” she said. She could feel him hovering behind her; she didn’t dare turn around. “Like you said… let’s not make it a bigger deal than it is.”
Collin grabbed her arm and spun her around. She didn’t resist, but she still didn’t dare to look him in the eye.
“I was talking about the car show, not our relationship!”
“Is that what it is? A relationship?”
He let out another frustrated sigh.
“Bre, would you just talk to me? You’re not acting like yourself!”
“This is who I am, Collin,” she said, finally looking up at him. The pain in his eyes hurt her more than she’d expected.
A loud ding sounded, finally, announcing the arrival of the elevator. She gave him one more look before turning away and stepping onto it. He didn’t follow her or try to stop her, but seeing him standing there with that hurt look in his eyes might have been even worse.
“We’re not ending like this,” Collin said.
“We had our fun. Just let it go.”
He shook his head as the door started sliding shut.
“I’ll call you later, after you’ve had some time to think about it.”
Bre wasn’t sure which descended faster: the elevator or her self respect.
Chapter Two
Bre didn’t stop her quick pace when she reached the street. She was determined to put as much distance between her and Collin and her horrible hopes and expectations as possible. An Uber would be quicker, but she needed to blow off some steam before she was stuck in a car for the ride back to Brooklyn.
She still couldn’t believe him. He’d only known her for a fucking week! What gave him the right to think he could start dictating what she would do with her life? She’d never been with a guy that bold, and she wasn’t about to start tolerating that kind of behavior from him. Who did he think he was?
Bre wasn’t really paying attention to her surroundings and she eventually got tired of walking around Manhattan. She needed to get back home so she could put this whole chapter of her life behind her. It was time to get back to the real world, where the men were all looking for simpler things like no-strings-attached sex. Things were just easier that way. She was done with all these Wall Street guys who knew how to manipulate and charm their way into her life.
When she finally made it back to her apartment she was again thankful she never let Collin come over. It made going back to her normal life much easier. There weren’t any memories of him in her place, or in her bed, for her to deal with. She didn’t have to dread crying into her pillow because it still smelled like him. Her apartment had always been a sanctuary; a safe place for her to return to when life got tough. Thankfully she could still call it that.
Bre dodged calls from Aimee and Stephanie, still needing some time to herself. A few hours passed while she took a relaxing shower and then busied herself with rearranging her bedroom
. Collin Hayes would be pushed far from her thoughts before long. She just had to keep moving. So it came as a surprise when her phone rang and she found his name printed on the screen.
Bre’s stomach fell to the floor as she stared at it. Why was it taking so long to go to voicemail? She didn’t dare to even mute the phone for fear that he’d know she saw his call and just didn’t want to talk to him. Her breaths didn’t come again until the ringing finally stopped. Almost instantly there was a loud beep as a text message came through.
I’m going to keep calling. Please talk to me.
Bre stared at the text for a long while, reading it a few times. She jumped when the phone started ringing again. Collin’s name flashed on the screen. Two buttons appeared: one to answer the call and one to decline it.
Bre didn’t dare press either one.
Was he really going to call her over and over until she answered? What if she had her phone muted because she was watching a movie? What if she was trying to take a nap? It’s not like either one of them had slept much the night before…
When the ringing finally stopped, the message app returned. Bre read the text again, and her temper got the better of her. She wasn’t going to let her phone be held captive. She was going to give him a piece of her mind!
Her fingers flew into action as she typed a response, letting him know they were done and he was just going to have to come to terms with it. There was nothing to talk about and he needed to leave her alone and move on!
Just as she went to push the Send button, the phone started buzzing with another call. The screen switched and, instead of hitting the button to send the text, she hit the Answer Call button.
Fuck!
Bre stared at the screen as a little timer started ticking off the duration of the call. Well, there was no turning back now… She slowly lifted it to her ear.
“Hello?”
“I didn’t think you were going to answer.”
“I didn’t mean to…”
It irritated her that Collin could sound so calm while she was freaking out.
“I’m glad you did. Can we talk?”
“We don’t really have anything to talk about.”
“Are you at home?”
Bre hesitated for a moment.
“Yes. Why?”
“I’m outside.”
“You’re what?”
She raced to the nearest window and took a peek. Sure enough, Collin was standing on the sidewalk with a phone to his ear, occasionally glancing up at the building. He was wearing khaki shorts and a forest green polo shirt with brown boat shoes. If he were anyone else she would have thought he looked pretentious. Instead he looked very well put together. Stupid man.
“I would have come up but I never got your apartment number…”
She glared down at him.
“That’s very bold of you. What if I had someone here with me?”
“Do you?” he asked, deadpanned.
“No… but that’s not the point!”
“I want to talk. Can I come up?”
The hardness from her anger didn’t last long as her stomach wrapped into a ball of nerves. Fine. They could talk if that was what it would take to get him to leave her alone. She turned and surveyed her apartment with a quick glance; the ball of nerves got worse. This just wouldn’t do…
“No,” she said, finally. “Give me a few minutes and I’ll be right down.”
What in the world was she getting herself into?
Chapter Three
Bre quickly pulled on a pair of jeans, a light purple tank, and a gray sweater before she slipped into her Chucks. She locked her apartment before bounding down the stairs, still uncertain about what the hell she was doing and why she was doing it.
This was a huge mistake. There just wasn’t any other explanation. Why in the world had she agreed to talk to him? No good could come from this. But, even knowing that, she still wanted to see him. She still wanted to be around him. She still wanted to know that he was near her; thinking about her; wanting her. Even if it was a bad idea.
Collin was waiting for her exactly where she’d seen him from her window. Uncertainty tugged his lip into a half-smile that was far more endearing than it should have been.
“Thanks for talking to me,” he said.
“You didn’t give me much of a choice.”
Awkward silence lingered for a moment before he responded.
“I noticed there’s a coffee shop up the street… My treat.”
Bre knew it well, though it wasn’t one of her regular places. She nodded and Collin fell in step next to her as they navigated the Brooklyn sidewalk. Neither of them said anything, which did nothing to relieve the weird tension building between them.
The spring weather was warm but Bre still crossed her arms in front of her, hugging her sweater tight. She didn’t like feeling this uncertain about herself or about the situation she was in. She hated feeling exposed and out of control but, with Collin, there was also a part of her that craved it.
It was a Saturday afternoon and the coffee shop was filled with the sounds of young professionals and new parents socializing. Bre secured them a table while Collin stood in line and ordered. He joined her a few minutes later and they both took advantage of the protection provided by their hot drinks to put off the conversation for just a while longer. The tense feeling in Bre’s chest didn’t get any better, though. She was just going to have to get it over with.
“So? What did you want to talk about?” she asked.
“First, I want to apologize for the whole car show thing.”
Bre waved him off, trying to be dismissive and play it cool.
“It’s not a big deal, I’m over it already,” she said, wondering why he would possibly believe her.
“I should have talked to you about it first.” A little grin spread across his face. “Surprises are kind of my thing. I like doing things for people when I know it will put a smile on their face. Sometimes I let myself get carried away. I know it can be overwhelming so, in the future, I’ll be sure to talk things over with you.”
The future.
After what had happened that morning, she didn’t think the future was going to be a thing they shared, so she just said, “Okay.”
Collin looked mollified for the moment; but it didn’t last.
“So what happened with you this morning?” he asked. “I thought things were going pretty well, and then you freaked out and ran away.”
Bre shifted, uncomfortably.
“I don’t really feel the need to explain anything.”
The look he gave her hardened.
“You said we were done and took off… Something must have triggered that.”
Bre hated that word: triggered. The only thing that triggered her was when others said they were triggered.
“Everything was just moving too fast. We agreed to take things slow and then you went out and got your… surprise.”
“What was all that about us being on a timer?” Collin asked.
“You didn’t think we were going to last forever, did you?”
“I didn’t really have any expectations for us.”
She shrugged.
“So you agree; we were bound to breakup at some point.”
“All I’m saying is that I like spending time with you and I’m not ready for that to end.”
“Oh.” The admission was so straightforward and authentic that it made Bre feel weird. She was torn between wanting to tell him she felt the same way and the nearly overpowering urge to run away as fast as possible. “Well, maybe it doesn’t have to stop…”
She felt crazy for even suggesting it. But she also didn’t know how to handle the situation. She knew she didn’t have a good reason for not being with him other than feeling emotionally overwhelmed anytime he was around.
“What does that mean?” he asked, plainly. “I can’t be just friends with you. I can’t be around you at all without wanting to get my hands all o
ver you.”
A new kind of rush went through her. Collin’s hands could do magical things when they were all over her. They could definitely make her feel better. She bit her lip, nervously, still feeling crazy for what she was about to propose. Her voice lowered as she reached under the table and ran her fingers up his thigh.
“They have single-person restrooms here. And the doors even lock. You can put your hands wherever you’d like…”
Collin didn’t take the offer the way she expected. He removed her hand from his leg without looking even a little tempted.
“We can’t do that.”
“Why not?”
His face hardened in frustration.
“I thought we agreed we didn’t want to do a casual fling.”
Why was he making such a big deal out of this? Couldn’t they just have a little fun and forget about all the serious stuff for a little while? Why did he have to make things so complicated?
“No, I don’t want that,” she admitted.
“What are we doing here, Bre?” he asked after blowing out a sigh. “You tell me you’re done then you tell me you still want me in your life… it’s all very confusing.”
“What do you want from me?”
“I want you to be straight with me: what are you looking for?”
Everything in her came to a standstill. It was a simple question and yet she had no idea what to say. And the fact that she knew she didn’t have a good answer for him made her feel even worse.