by Tracy Vo
When Uncle Five and my dad walked through the front door, everyone hid their excitement and pretended they didn’t know each other: there were other people in the eating house and the family didn’t want to attract attention to themselves. Uncle Five and Dad sat down at a separate table. By now the atmosphere was tense and everyone was nervous.
Dad whispered to Uncle Five, ‘Brother, I have a bad feeling we’re being watched.’ Uncle Five looked discreetly around the eating house. He didn’t see anyone watching them, but he had a bad feeling too. He quietly told Dad they would soon have to split up the group and move on, as well as get rid of the scooter, but first they should eat then drive around town, looking for the organisers. ‘We don’t know when we will be able to eat again,’ Uncle Five added.
The meeting place was at a nearby park, directly in front of a movie theatre. The organisers had told Uncle Five that if anyone was questioned by police, they could simply reply they were there to see a movie. It was also a regular gathering spot for locals who would sit together, eat and talk, so it was crowded and public—the perfect meeting place, Mum thought.
Dad and Uncle Five left the eating house first. Dad quickly scoured the road to see if he could spot any organisers in the area. He couldn’t see them anywhere. He did, however, see the Cong An, the local police force, watching him. Now he was really nervous. Uncle Five had seen them too, and as they got back on the scooter, he spoke quietly to Dad about their next moves. He and Dad would ride around for a while looking for the organisers, then Dad would leave Uncle Five at the park, check the eating house to make sure all the family had left, get rid of the scooter and make his way back to the park as quickly as possible.
For the others, it was only a short walk from the eating house to the park. They split up into three groups and Mum left with Aunt Five and her three children, Aunt Sixteen and Aunt Twelve. At the park the family sat in their groups on different benches. Mum spotted Dad and Uncle Five riding around the park a couple of times, then she saw Dad drop off Uncle Five and ride away. Mum told the aunties that she was going to walk over and see Uncle Five, but before she stood up Aunt Five stopped her.
‘Lien, I have to give you something,’ Aunt Five said and pulled a small bag from her trouser pocket. ‘I have some valuables. Things we may need later to sell or exchange for food. I’m too scared to carry them. I won’t be able to lie if I’m searched and caught with them. You’re much stronger than me. Can you please keep them safe with you?’
Aunt Five gave my mother a bag containing some jade stones, pearls and gold jewellery. She also handed her three small gold sheets which Uncle Five had asked her to give to Mum for safekeeping.
‘Don’t worry, Sister,’ Mum said. ‘I will look after them. We will all look after each other.’
Mum slipped the bag and gold sheets into her jacket pocket then walked casually to a public toilet. She knew there was only one place she would not be searched and that was her underwear. She tucked the gold inside her undergarments, but left the small bag of jewels in her jacket pocket. She couldn’t fit it all in her underwear. The gold was worth much more to them than the jewels. She walked back to the park and when she saw Uncle Five, she wanted to rush over to him and find out what was happening, but instead she approached him cautiously.
Uncle Five greeted her normally, but whispered, ‘We have to be very careful. Police were watching me and Tai. He’s getting rid of the scooter.’
Mum was immediately worried about Dad but Uncle Five assured her that he would be at the park soon. She explained how the family had split into groups in the park. Uncle Five was very pleased that the family had followed his instructions and were all safe; he could only hope the organisers would find them, as he was no longer able to speak to the family directly. Nor was Mum able to return to the aunties’ group in case it created suspicion.
‘I don’t know who else could be watching us now,’ Uncle Five said.
The streets were becoming chaotic and there were people everywhere. Night life in Vietnam, even in those days, was busy with people gathering, eating, shopping, doing business or just out for the evening. As the park filled with people and activity, the family groups lost sight of each other.
Meanwhile, Dad had ridden back to the eating house and discovered, thankfully, that all his family had left safely. There were more police in the area now and he was getting really worried. He suspected they knew something was going on. With so many people trying to leave the country, the police were always looking out for potential escapees, and Dad had caught their eye. Even though he had tried to dress like a local, not like a Saigon Downtowner, he must have stood out. Dad left the eating house and rode around until he was sure he wasn’t being followed, then found a dark and quiet area. He parked the scooter and walked away. He left the keys in it—hopefully, they would not need it anymore and someone would appreciate the gift.
Dad arrived at the park at about 9.30 p.m. but there were so many people around he couldn’t see anyone he recognised. For the first time, he started to panic. What if Uncle Five hadn’t found the organisers? What if the organisers had been caught? Or, perhaps worse, what if they’d already left without him? Dad had to keep his cool. His eyes darted around the park; he had to calm himself down. Then he spotted Uncle Ut and Uncle Tinh with two others from the group. They were with the brothers of Uncle Five’s sister-in-law. Dad was so happy and relieved to see them. The brothers spoke for a while, explaining to Dad what had happened, then they all decided to go for a walk.
As they made their way around the park, the group still did not see any other family members or anyone who looked like an organiser. Suddenly, a stranger brushed past Dad and mumbled something without speaking directly to him. Dad thought he heard the words ‘Brother Five’, so he stopped and looked at the man.
Without making eye contact, the man asked, ‘Are you with Brother Five?’
When Dad quickly replied that they were, the man slowed his pace so he was momentarily walking alongside Dad. The man just kept looking straight ahead.
‘We need to go now,’ he said to Dad. ‘Follow me.’ Then he strode ahead as if they had never spoken.
Dad and the rest of his group tailed the man through the park. Dad was worried about Mum and the rest of the family, but he couldn’t go back to look for them. He just had to hope that they had been found, like his group. The man led them to the river at Long Xuyen on the Mekong Delta, only about 2 kilometres away. There were so many boats at the dock. Dad and his brothers looked out over the water, wondering which boat was theirs. There was one terrible old fishing boat that already had people on board. It was dirty and the wood was deteriorating; Dad was surprised it was still afloat. As they reached it Dad saw the crew members preparing for departure. He didn’t know any of the men who were directing him to get on the boat. Another bout of panic hit him. He hesitated.
The man who had led them there tried to reassure him. ‘Don’t worry, this is only the boat that will take you to a bigger boat further out on the river.’
Dad and his brothers looked at each other but none of them moved.
‘You need to get on now,’ the man said, scanning the dock nervously.
One by one the brothers climbed on. It was around 10.30 p.m. There were about thirty people onboard but none of them were Dad’s family. The brothers waited together, quietly discussing the situation among themselves. A few more groups arrived but they were all strangers. Then, about half an hour later, Aunt Five, her three children, Aunt Sixteen and Aunt Twelve boarded the boat. They all looked so worried and scared, as if they too were wondering if this was the right boat. Dad rushed over to them straight away and he saw Aunt Five’s face lift with relief.
‘Tai! We’re so happy to see you,’ she said, hugging him. ‘We didn’t know who would be on the boat. Have you seen anyone else?’
‘No, Sister Five.’ Dad explained how he’d found his brothers at the park. ‘Have you seen Brother Five? Where is Lien?’
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bsp; Aunt Five told him that she last saw them together, but the park became so busy she had lost sight of them. ‘I lost sight of everyone,’ she said tearily. Dad comforted his sister as best he could. ‘At least we’re together now,’ he said. ‘Let’s pray they get here soon.’
The organisers had concerns of their own. The group was becoming too noisy. Children were screaming, people were crying. Without telling anyone, the crew decided to move the boat from the dock further out onto the river. The engine started.
‘Why are we moving?’ Aunt Five whispered to Dad.
‘I don’t know,’ he replied. He wanted to ask the crew what was happening, to say, Don’t leave, not everyone is here yet. Aunt Five burst into tears again.
Then the boat stopped not far away from the dock and one of the crew members stood up. He explained that they were being too noisy and they had to move further out. ‘You need to keep quiet or we will get caught,’ he said. The passengers were silent after that.
When Dad saw a small water taxi approaching their boat, at first he thought it was the police. But to his immense relief, it was a load of passengers—and not just another arrival but a group of his family: Uncle Five’s brother and his wife and daughter, and Anh Tuan, Uncle Five’s friend’s son. But there was still no sign of Uncle Five and Mum. Time was running out and Dad was really worried about them now.
At the park, the hours went by and Uncle Five and Mum were still sitting on the bench. They had lost sight of the other family members in the crowd, and while hundreds of people had passed them, no one had stopped to speak to them. There had been no signal, no contact from the organisers. By 11.30 p.m. the streets were becoming empty and Uncle Five was becoming alarmed. He kept looking around the park, which was much too quiet. It was no longer safe for them to stay there. The police would notice them and ask why they were still around so late.
‘We have to try to find the boat ourselves,’ Uncle Five said to Mum. ‘We can’t wait any longer.’
Mum knew that something was wrong and the organisers weren’t coming for them now, and even though she trusted Uncle Five, she started to feel frightened. There were hundreds of boats at the dock, as well as the constant presence of the military and police. To find the boat themselves seemed an impossible task.
On the boat, all Dad and the others could do was wait. The crew knew they were missing two people, but it was already midnight and they needed to get further out onto the river to wait for their next signal. The crew looked at Dad and his family. Their expression was not comforting—it was obvious they intended to leave without Uncle Five and Mum. Dad’s heart sank. He didn’t want to go without his older brother, the head of their family and the one who had organised their escape. And, even more, he didn’t want to leave without the woman he loved.
Dad looked down at his left hand and stared at the ring on his finger. About a month before, there had been discussions between the two families, approving a marriage between my parents. However, with Vietnam the way it was after the war, Mum and Dad and their families knew they would never have a proper wedding ceremony. So Mum decided to be prepared in another way and before they left Ho Chi Minh City she bought two wedding rings. She gave one to Dad, who kept it in his pocket until just before he jumped on the boat. For him their union was already official from the moment Mum agreed to escape Vietnam with him, but wearing the ring made him feel complete. Now, though, he was about to be separated from her and he was devastated.
The crew looked out over the water one last time; they didn’t want to leave anyone behind but they’d already waited too long and it was time to go. Shaking their heads in disappointment and regret, they prepared the boat to depart. The engine clicked over several times but wouldn’t start. Everyone looked at the crew with concern as they continued trying, with no success. The engine wouldn’t start.
From the park, Uncle Five and Mum took a xic lo down to the dock, where they were confronted with the sight of many boats, most of them empty. They walked along the jetty but had no idea what they were looking for. Uncle Five could not see any of the crew or organisers.
Mum felt deflated and thought they had missed the boat. She especially felt bad for Uncle Five—after all he had done for the family, everything he’d sold, and all the effort he’d put into organising the escape, he was going to be left behind. But Uncle Five wasn’t done yet.
When a small water taxi drew up to a nearby jetty, Uncle Five waved at the driver then grabbed Mum, saying, ‘Come on, Lien. Get in the taxi. We need to get out onto the water.’
Mum didn’t think they’d find the boat among the many vessels out on the river, but they had nothing to lose by trying.
‘Take us out to those boats,’ Uncle Five said to the driver, pointing at some fishing boats further out.
‘Which one do you want to go to?’ the driver asked.
‘Just take us out there.’
They went from boat to boat but they were all empty or had only local fishermen on board. Then Uncle Five and Mum heard some children crying, and knew it had to be coming from their boat.
Uncle Five told the driver to take them to the boat and as they got closer he heard the engine ticking over. He realised they had made it just in time. The crew were both relieved and surprised to see Uncle Five and Mum, and stopped working on the engine so they could help them on board. The water taxi sped off immediately: the driver had realised what the boat was for and he didn’t want to be caught anywhere near it.
The crew hurried back to try to start the engine—the longer they stayed, the more likely they would be caught—and Uncle Five and Mum went searching for their family. With more than a hundred passengers on board, it was very crowded. It was also dark and everyone was silent. Mum and Uncle Five threaded their way through the passengers, scanning what they could see of their faces, until suddenly she heard a familiar voice, quiet but clear.
‘Brother! Lien! You finally made it,’ Dad said as he hugged them both. ‘We were so worried about you both. Where were you?’
‘We were waiting at the park to be called, but no one came to get us.’ Uncle Five explained how they had walked from the park to the docks then finally found the boat. Then he asked Dad, ‘But why hasn’t the boat left? It should have been gone by now.’
‘We were going to leave without you, because it was getting too late,’ Dad said. ‘But the boat wouldn’t start for some reason.’
‘I hope it starts soon,’ Uncle Five said, frowning. ‘If we’re still here at daylight, we’ll be caught for sure.’
Dad led Uncle Five and Mum to a corner of the boat where the rest of the family were huddled. Their celebrations were silent but heartfelt. They all hugged each other. They were all together now.
Mum and Dad stood together, a little away from the others. ‘Lien, I’ve decided to wear this,’ Dad said to Mum, showing her the ring on his finger.
Mum smiled. ‘I don’t want to wear mine yet because I’m scared I’ll lose it,’ she said, ‘but I have it here.’ She pointed to her left arm, where she had hidden her ring in the sleeve of her shirt.
And that was it—the moment my parents were ‘married’.
When I was young I was always told that my parents exchanged their marriage vows during their boat journey. But, in truth, there were no vows or celebrations or ceremony. It was simply an understanding between two people who knew they wanted to spend the rest of their lives together, whatever those lives would be. It was a commitment in the truest way.
The roar of the boat engine was startling in the silence. The crew looked at each other, amazed. These were experienced boatmen; they’d checked the entire engine, unable to find out why it wouldn’t start. There was no logical reason why it was suddenly working now. Mum and Dad believe ‘someone from above was looking out for them’, delaying the boat until Uncle Five and Mum arrived, so they could all leave together.
There were 121 people on this small fishing boat. They were forced below deck where it was so crowded everyone
was forced to stand. There was no room to move. No one slept. They just kept staring into the darkness.
The boat headed towards the meeting point between the towns of Cao Lanh and My Tho, about 80 kilometres away. It was a long distance for a very small, very slow-moving fishing boat overloaded with passengers. They left Long Xuyen just after midnight and arrived at their next destination by midday. Everyone was tired and hungry, but even if there had been food and water, they were too anxious to eat. At the meeting point the boat stopped, rocking on the water, while they waited for a signal.
The boat was hot and dirty, and water was seeping through holes in the wood. Below deck one tiny window admitted a trickle of sunlight. There was no fresh air. Most of the escapees suffered severe seasickness; many fainted and would lie unconscious on the floor.
Time passed and Uncle Five took Dad aside. The last time his family had eaten any food was almost twenty-four hours before. They were anchored only about 50 metres from the shore so Uncle Five suggested that Dad swim over to see if he could find any food. Dad was a very strong swimmer, and he made the short distance easily, but he was worried about what the locals might think when they saw him. It was obvious he wasn’t from the area, and on top of that he was fully clothed and soaking wet! But the locals went on with their business and didn’t seem to think anything of it, which seemed to Dad suspicious in itself. He walked around some of the street markets, trying to buy food for the family, but most of it was too difficult to carry back to the boat. So after about an hour on land, he swam back empty-handed. At least he was able to get off the boat for a short time and have a break from the other passengers, whose anxiety levels were becoming unbearable.
There was still no sign of the other boat. Uncle Five had asked the crew but they had no idea what was going on. They had expected a tugboat, bigger and much stronger than the fishing boat, to have arrived by now. It was obvious that they too were getting very concerned but they couldn’t tell Uncle Five anything more.