At first Mallory thought it was just the beauty of making love until she was brought suddenly back to reality as her back hit the edge of the coffee table and she was flat on her back with the wind knocked clean out of her. When she opened her eyes she saw Del peering down at her.
“Are you all right?” Del asked.
“No, I was on the verge of coming, now get down here,” Mallory said, pulling Del on top of her.
She could feel both of them getting closer and Mallory held out until she was almost positive Del was right there and then together they collapsed with a mutual “Oh . . .”
Del kissed her softly. “I love you,” she said, seriousness and the flush of desire still on her face.
“If you love me, you will get me off this floor and take me someplace soft, preferably the bedroom,” Mallory said.
“By all means,” Del said, helping her up and then carrying her into the bedroom where the soft and sensuous part of making love would take place.
Alex put out Gigi’s birthday card and a single red rose on the coffee table. She pulled the afghan up around Gigi’s shoulders. She knew Gigi probably wouldn’t wake until almost noon but she didn’t want her to feel neglected on her birthday. She felt bad for Gigi about the whole debacle with her family but as she told Taylor what did Gigi really expect? You can only push people so far and then they walk out of your life. Sometimes Alex wondered when Gigi would do that to her. It seemed only a matter of time before Gigi turned. She eventually turned on everyone she was ever involved with, everyone except Mallory, but then Mallory was the one person in the entire universe that Gigi loved with every ounce of her being. So Alex waited and tried to keep herself from falling in love with Taylor, whom she was going to have breakfast with, and then she’d go shopping at Price Club to get the party goods. Alex could not persuade Taylor to come to the party but did get her to at least play golf together before the party.
She felt a slight pang of guilt as she wrote Gigi a brief note as to her morning errands and then dashed out the door to spend time with Taylor. There was a chemistry between her and Taylor that had nothing to do with lust but rather with that wonderful sense of companionship that few people ever really achieve. Those who do find it end up staying together forever. She knew it was only a matter of time before they would become lovers but until they worked out the logistics they seemed to bask in the moment and the promise of an unspoken future.
As Alex drove across town to the Good Egg on Central her mind played over last night when she had come over to Taylor’s for dinner. It all started harmlessly enough. Taylor had convinced Alex that having a workout in the middle of the day was not only beneficial but staved off the middle-aged middle-of-the-waistline bulge. They didn’t get lunch until they worked out. This was the end of Alex’s second week and she was sore.
She told Taylor she was going to have a long, hot bath because for once Gigi didn’t have them booked for a gala night of party central; instead she was pulling a shift for one of the other girls at the shop. Gigi was actually excited. Friday was a hopping night for freak watching. Alex was looking forward to a reprieve from Gigi’s crowded life. But Taylor had other ideas.
“Well, if she’s working late why don’t you come and sit in the hot tub and I’ll grill you a steak. You need a lot of protein when you’re building muscles. We’ll watch a flick and just chill. It’ll be fun,” Taylor said, barely containing her excitement. Any snatch of time she could get Alex was practically a holiday in her book.
“It’s sounds inviting . . .” Alex replied.
“Please come,” Taylor said, trying to keep pleading out of her voice but her eyes gave her away.
“I can go shopping for dinner right after work while you go home and get your bathing suit and some comfy clothes and then we’ll meet at my house.”
“How can I refuse?” Alex teased.
“You can’t. You’re coming.”
“All right,” Alex said.
Taylor went dancing across the office. Her father noticed and came in to check on his daughter. She was so happy lately and he attributed it to her spending time with Alex, who was also looking a lot happier. He used to worry about Alex because she always seemed like she was just going through the motions of life without really enjoying any of it. He thought this was sad for someone so young and so capable of vitality.
“You’re looking rather perky for a Friday.”
“Dad, are you alluding to my usual black moods on the weekends because I don’t get to see my friend for two whole days?”
“Well, seeing as you mentioned it.”
“Alex is free tonight so we’re doing a hot tub, steaks and a movie.”
“That explains everything.”
“Yes, it does.”
“You’re in love aren’t you?”
“Madly,” Taylor said, without exhibiting any restraint.
“What about the girlfriend?”
“I’m waiting,” Taylor replied.
“Is that going to work?”
“You said love always prevails.”
“It does, I assure you. Have a good weekend and be honest.”
“Because it’s the best policy?”
“Precisely.”
Alex showed up with two bottles of Merlot and a bouquet of flowers.
“It’s a hostess gift,” Alex said, blushing.
“They’re beautiful,” Taylor replied, sticking her face into the flowers.
“I hoped you’d like them,” Alex said, thinking what a pleasant luxury it was to buy flowers for someone who didn’t think such an action was an affront, that it was a mimicking of heterosexual values, which was exactly what Gigi would think. Alex had never dared purchase flowers. Tonight she felt so relaxed in doing this small action that gave her such pleasure, knowing for certain that Taylor would enjoy them.
“Let me stick these in water. Why don’t you get changed and we’ll soak before dinner. Everything is ready so we have some chill time.”
“Okay,” Alex said, as Taylor led her down the hall to the guest room.
When she came out Taylor put a soft white terry cloth robe around Alex’s shoulders.
“It gets chilly until you get in the hot tub and especially afterwards. You want some music, something mellow?” Taylor asked.
“That sounds wonderful.”
Taylor put music on and then waited for Alex to disrobe and slip into the hot tub. They stood looking at each other. Taylor spoke first.
“I had no idea,” Taylor said.
“No idea what?” Alex said, getting into the hot tub, hoping the steam would cover her blush.
“How lovely you are,” Taylor replied.
“You’re not so bad yourself,” Alex replied, taking what she knew to be a very errant hand and running it down Taylor’s flat firm stomach.
Taylor turned beet red and immediately plopped into the hot tub.
Alex laughed.
“What?”
“You’re shy,” Alex teased.
“I can’t help it.”
“Why?”
The moment of truth had come and Taylor tried not to freak.
“I can’t say it.”
“Why not?” Alex asked.
“Because you’re with someone,” Taylor said, immediately hating herself for being a coward.
“Say it anyway,” Alex replied, feeling her heartbeat rapidly increase.
“I’m in love with you. I know I’m not supposed to be but I can’t help it. I hope this doesn’t wreck our friendship . . . I mean I can pretend it’s not there, I can take it back, I can wait forever . . .”
Her diatribe was interrupted. Alex moved dangerously close and kissed her softly on the lips. It was the first illicit kiss she’d ever given anyone but Alex told herself it was for love, big love that she had committed this indiscretion and she knew after Gigi’s birthday she would tell her how she felt about Taylor and leave.
Taylor kissed her back but then stopped.
&
nbsp; “I don’t want to be your mistress.”
“You won’t be,” Alex said, pulling her close.
And they were good. They talked but they didn’t make love. Not that it couldn’t have happened, not that the whole night wasn’t infused with desire, not like they didn’t hold each other as they sat by the fire and talked about how they wanted to live their lives and not like they didn’t kiss each other ardently goodbye but they waited, waited for Alex to be free, waited so as not to ruin a birthday and hurt a person who was already hurting.
“It will be all right,” Alex said.
“I know,” Taylor said.
Breakfast with Taylor was lovely and now as Alex loaded groceries in the house with assistance from Mallory and Del she tried hard not to look like a woman in love with someone else.
Gigi tried not to look like a woman on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Having Fran and Lil come to her party helped. At least, part of her family would be there. Gigi didn’t expect her parents to acknowledge anything but there was a part of her that wished for forgiveness, that wished for a moment of respite, one she knew wasn’t coming.
As her friends started to fill the house and the keg got tapped and air mattresses littered the pool, Gigi started to relax. After all she did have a family, if not blood at least by choice, and for that she felt a small glowing ember of glee and humility enter her black world. She almost felt happy. Even if Alex wasn’t fawning she was at least present and cordial but Gigi knew something was amiss, something she hoped she could fix.
Maybe it was the way Alex kissed her or the way her eyes seemed less than loving, less than full of desire, like she was preoccupied. Gigi crossed it off to hostess stress and began to ease into the party mode, allowing for some fun, if only for the afternoon. There would be time to talk later. She felt now that maybe she could learn to love Alex properly, bringing her back, promising her fidelity and the chance to start their life together the right way.
Gigi sat in a lawn chair by the pool and watched Mallory and Del in the pool wrapped around each other and kissing. They looked madly in love and very sexual.
“For shit sake why don’t you two get a room if you’re going to behave like that,” Gigi said.
“We would if we didn’t have to attend a very special person’s birthday fete,” Mallory said, gently inserting her tongue in Del’s ear.
“I don’t think Gigi is doing well when it comes to Mallory and Del’s love affair,” Alex told Kim, who was doing a poor job of not drooling over Angel in a bathing suit. She knew hers were among many admiring eyes at the party. She did redirect them long enough to reply to Alex’s observation.
“Gigi had her chance, no offense.”
“None taken. I’ve always known that Gigi was in love with Mallory among others,” Alex said.
“Are you all right?” Kim said, picking up a strange vibe from Alex.
“I’m fine, just thinking back on things. You haven’t seen Ollie in a while have you?”
“No, thank goodness,” Kim said, suddenly wondering if Alex knew about Ollie and Gigi’s liaison. She had often wondered if she should have told Alex what she knew about that night in the van when they were fucking each other. She talked to Angel about it and they both decided it was best to let it alone. Time had a way of revealing all that needed to be told. Maybe Alex already knew.
“Pity she isn’t here to see the lovely accoutrements of your new girlfriend,” Alex said, as they both watched Angel take a perfect dive off the board.
“Yes, that would truly be a precious moment,” Kim said.
“One I’d like to see,” Alex said.
“So I hear tell you have taken up golf again with a certain partner, a very attractive partner.”
“Who told you that?” Alex said, feeling her face flush remembering last night.
“Pink Mafia tells all. Grapevine gets around and we know someone who works at the pro shop at the Country Club,” Kim teased. “Good for you.”
“You know Shelley?” Alex asked.
“Her girlfriend works at the hospital. She says Taylor is absolutely in love with you.”
“How does she know that?”
“The look, I guess,” Kim said.
“It’s a small world,” Alex said, quietly.
“What the hell happened to your back?” Gigi said, as Mallory got out of the pool.
“Del pushed me off the couch,” Mallory said, winking at Del, who was instantly mortified.
“It was an accident,” Del said.
“Accident my ass, more like a pelvic thrust,” Mallory said, doing her best to look lascivious.
Both Del and Gigi stood amazed.
“What can I say—I am now a sexual being. Is there a problem with that?” Mallory replied.
Alex and Kim both started to giggle. Gigi scowled.
“What?” Alex said. “It’s cute. Obviously, they were making love and Mallory fell.”
“You’re talking about my best friend here,” Gigi replied.
“So? She has every right to be in love,” Alex said.
“Yeah, well does she have to flaunt it?” Gigi grumbled.
“Why? Because you don’t like how it feels? Be happy for her,” Alex said.
“Yes, be really happy for me,” Mallory said, pulling Del close.
“It has been a long time coming,” Kim said, thinking back to Mallory’s pajama-wearing celibacy days. This was definitely an improvement. Mallory had blossomed into a charming, witty, and outgoing young woman with a few eccentricities. But even those were more an illustration of her individuality rather than any crippling behavior left behind by emotional upheaval. Kim was amazed at the incredible power of love to make or break people.
Whatever Mallory’s ex-girlfriend had done to Mallory had now been repaired by Del and it was a beautiful sight. She was beginning to see signs of that same repair in herself because of Angel, who came over to sit next to Kim and see what all the commotion was.
Kim winked at her and whispered, “They finally made love,” cocking her head toward the two lovebirds.
“What a delicious thought,” Angel said, kissing Kim’s ear and moving her hand up Kim’s stomach and dangerously close to her scantily clad breast. Kim blushed. She thanked the powers that be for putting love in the universe and for removing Ollie from her sight, she hoped for all time.
Gigi went off to check on Lil and Fran, who seemed to be doing quite well with the younger crowd as she discovered. They were telling tall tales to a rapt audience of Gigi’s bar fly, pool shooting, women cruising, buddies. Gigi sat and listened for a while and then went on to explore the rest of her party. Everything seemed to be in order so she slipped off for a quick nap. This not getting any sleep at night was really starting to wear on her but suddenly being surrounded by the safety of her friends in loud noisy numbers she felt comforted and sleepy. She knew the party would rage for hours to come.
When Alex went to look for her later she found Gigi fast asleep with a face like an angel. She kissed her forehead softly so as not to wake her and let her be. Moments of peace to a tormented soul were not to be snatched away lightly. Alex sat on the corner of the bed and remembered how she had first come to know this tattered little soul that lay before her. Gigi hadn’t been so raggedy then, rather she seemed like a welcome breath of pure oxygen, volatile, electric, and prone to getting one high by her mere presence.
Alex had not been an easy catch. She was still scarred and very leery of women after coming off a long stint with a woman who came home one day after work and told her she was in love with someone else. Alex did all the usual things, cried, screamed, had insomnia, promised to wait, and then finally moved out. She had tried going out on a few dates but found she wasn’t the kind of woman who dated. She couldn’t stand the countless awkward moments one had to endure before companionship finally arrived.
One day she went to a party and met Gigi—or rather Gigi introduced herself and then spent the rest of the evening making
Alex laugh. But when Gigi asked for Alex’s phone number she declined, telling Gigi she was done with dating and perhaps they would run into each other again. From that moment forward Gigi managed to show up at every social event Alex attended. Alex accused her of stalking and Gigi replied that she knew every lesbian in town and always asked if a certain attractive, witty, blond accountant would be attending the event.
Actually, when push came to shove Gigi knew a friend of a friend of Alex’s. Gigi professed an incredible infatuation that she pleaded Alex make go away by spending some time with her. Alex finally relented, telling Gigi that she wasn’t looking for lifelong love but a fling might do. Gigi said she’d take what she could get. They fell comfortably into mutual acquaintance and it worked until Gigi’s grandmother died and left her money. She took Alex on her house-hunting journeys, telling her she would blow the money if she didn’t buy something big.
Gigi kept asking if Alex liked each house. Alex kept asking why it mattered if she liked the house, it was Gigi’s house. “Because I want you to live with me,” Gigi told her. At first she refused until Gigi talked her into it, using the ardent factor. Alex eventually agreed and that was how they came to be lovers and roommates. And now it seemed they were a couple, a couple in love. For a while this worked until Gigi grew complacent and then started the casual cruising that slowly killed what could have been a good love affair.
Now looking at her sleeping, Alex felt the weight of their choices. Choices made of noncommittal behaviors. Choices that said you can walk whenever you want. And now Alex knew she was going to take that walk. It wasn’t like Gigi had pushed her away but she had always left that open door, the door that allowed Taylor in. It made her sad looking at her lover sleeping and Alex realized this was going to be harder than she had anticipated.
Saxon Bennett - Talk of the Town Page 19