“Cufflinks,” said Cameron. “Mia, they’re wonderful. Thank you.”
He stared down at the miniature Royal Crowns.
“Their design is based on—”
“The Tower of London.” His gaze held mine. “Thank you, Mia. They’re perfect.”
I was so happy to see he liked it. “Okay, now you, Richard.” I gave him his gift and watched him as he ripped it open.
He pulled out the tiny brass Buddha statue.
“Give it a shake,” I said. “It has a small metal bead inside it. Tibetan monks made it. And here’s your other gift.”
“Mia it’s wonderful,” he said, beaming. “I love it.” He unraveled the second gift and pulled out a bracelet of small jade beads.
“That was made by Tibetan monks too,” I said. “I want it to keep you safe when you go off on your adventures. I support your adrenaline junkie lifestyle and I want you to know that.”
He pulled on the bracelet. “Mia, thank you. This means the world to me.”
“I got them all from Fortnum and Mason,” I said. “They’re all classy gifts.”
“We can see that, Mia,” said Cameron. “Well done.”
Richard shook the small Buddha close to his ear. “It’s a prayer bead.”
“It is?” I said.
He gave a nod. “Yes, you’re meant to shake it to center yourself. It’s a reminder to bring you back to the present.”
I sat back on my heels.
Richard added, “Buddha will watch over us when we sleep.”
“Now it’s our turn,” said Shay. “This one is from me.”
I ripped the card open and read inside. “Really?” I all but freaked out.
Shay had gifted me fencing lessons. I leaped up and hugged him, so excited by the idea of learning such an elegant sport.
“These guys keep buying you jewelry and clothes,” he said, amused. “Women are so hard to buy for.”
“It’s perfect, Shay. Thank you so much,” I said.
Cameron handed me a small wrapped gift and I made my way into it. Flipping open the lid, I found a small plastic key inside.
“It’s symbolic,” he said. “Your gift is waiting for you back in L.A.”
I peered up at him, wondering what it represented. “Is it a key to Chrysalis?”
Richard blinked at him. “You got her a car?”
“Well have you seen hers?” said Cameron. “The oil leaks.”
“A car?” said Richard.
Staring down at the key, I wondered if accepting such an amazing gift was something I could do, and from Richard’s face I knew he was having a hard time with it.
“It’s a BMW,” said Cameron. “Nothing flashy.”
“It is kind of flashy,” I said. “It’s amazing.”
“We want you to be safe.” He turned to Richard. “We can’t have her on the freeway in that old mini.”
“She could always use one of mine,” said Richard. “She knows that.”
Cameron gave me a look. “Don’t make a fuss. It’s nothing.”
Richard rolled his eyes at him.
I looked over at Richard to see if he was going to let me keep it, unsure if I was worthy of such a gift.
“Well?” said Richard. “Say thank you, Mia.”
Still unsure about it, I threw my arms around Cameron’s neck. “I’ll make it up to you.”
“It’s a gift,” he said, easing my arms off him. “You don’t have to make anything up to me.”
Richard nudged an oblong box my way. Inside rested the most beautiful pair of strappy heels. Black soles and silver straps encrusted with tiny crystals.
“They’re Valentino,” he said. “They’ll look amazing on you.”
“They’re incredible,” I said, my eyes watering.
“No you don’t,” said Cameron. “We care deeply for you Mia and love having you around.”
Richard’s eyes snapped over to him.
I leaned over and gave Richard a big hug. “I love them.”
“Come on,” said Shay, pushing himself to his feet. “Let’s show you a few fencing moves.”
“Show me a parry,” I said, remembering Cameron once mentioning he’d like to teach me that one.
It had been during my spying trip around Cameron’s Beverly Hills home, where I’d caught him and Shay thrusting sabers at each other in the sports hall. Cameron had wanted to show me a parry, which was used to deflect or block an attack.
“How about some more coffee?” said Cameron.
“Love some,” said Richard.
“I’ll get it.” I headed for the kitchen.
“I’m about to perform one of my most daring exploits yet,” said Richard darkly.
I turned round to face him, unsteady on my feet.
“This kind of reminds me of the day I leaped off the Eiffel Tower,” said Richard. “Not sure whether I’d live or die.”
“What are you going to do?” I asked nervously.
His eyes glinted with mischief. “I’m going to have some of your apple crumble.”
I ran back and punched his arm.
Richard fell back in a heap of laughter.
CHAPTER 32
LATER THAT EVENING I flew into a panic.
I’d gone to Cameron’s bedroom to talk about his gift and tell him I couldn’t accept something as incredible as a car. Only I’d found his wardrobe empty and his suitcase gone.
I took two stairs at a time and burst into the kitchen. Shay sat alone at the counter. He sipped on a coffee. “Richard’s in the gym,” he said. “He’s working off your apple crumble.”
“Where’s Cameron?” I said.
“You just missed him. You were taking a nap. He didn’t want to wake you.”
“Did he leave?”
“He’s heading back to L.A. He’s got a ton of work waiting for him.”
“But it’s still Christmas day.”
Dread swept over me.
Shay lowered his gaze.
I bolted down the hallway.
“You’ll need an umbrella,” he shouted after me.
I shoved open the door and ran into the front yard, sprinting through the gate, rain pouring and soaking me.
A Rolls Royce pulled away from the curb. I ran alongside it and slammed my hand against the window.
The car jolted to a stop.
The back window slid down.
“You weren’t going to say goodbye?” I said.
Cameron looked harried. “Mia, go back inside.”
“You didn’t come find me?”
He sucked in a breath. “I didn’t want to wake you.”
“I deserve a goodbye,” I said. “After everything we’ve shared.”
“You’re right of course,” he said calmly. “Goodbye, Mia.”
I stomped my foot. “No, I deserve a proper goodbye.”
“Spending time with you…” He stared off. “It’s been effective.”
“Effective?”
“Yes. We’ve both benefited from this.”
“Where are you?” I said. “Where’s my kind, thoughtful Cameron? I need him right now. I need you.”
He shook his head. “It’ll get easier. I promise.”
“But it can’t end like this,” I said. “With you driving off and not looking back.”
“Please, Mia, you’re getting soaked. I’ll see you in L.A.” He gestured to the driver. “Go, please.”
“Wait,” I snapped at the driver.
Cameron lowered his head. “We knew this day would come. I’m sorry if I didn’t prepare you for it better.”
“Are you ever going to tell me how you feel about me?” I stared at his beautiful face, needing to hear those words he’d never spoken.
“You are…” He measured his words. “My finest work.”
The window slid up and the car pulled away.
I stood there staring, my throat tight with anguish. As I heaved breaths, I found the weight of each one too heavy to bear.
Th
e car stopped.
Cameron got out and ran back to me. I sprinted to meet him halfway and fell into his arms.
Safe.
This man who knew me so well, understood my needs, and helped me laugh at my quirks. The man who’d saved me from my past.
I wanted to beg him not to go, but at the same time I feared I’d disappoint him.
I peered into his eyes. “You’re getting wet too now.”
He hugged me into him. “It’s just rain.”
Pressing my face against his chest, I let out a sob. “I’ll be good. I promise.”
He planted kiss after kiss to the top of my head, with his strong arms wrapped around me.
Holding his gaze, I waited for him to say those words he knew I needed to hear.
I blinked raindrops off my lashes. “You taught me how to read the secret language of the heart. I know.”
“Shush.”
“Cameron?”
He looked past me. “Take her inside.”
I turned to see Shay holding an umbrella.
Cameron nudged me towards him. Shay took my hand and pulled me away, through the gate, and back into the house. Glancing back, Cameron stood stock still on the pavement staring after us. Rain fell on him, but he didn’t seem to care.
Shay shut the door behind us, pulled closed the umbrella, and rested it in the corner.
“I’ll make you a nice cup of tea,” he said, taking my hand and guiding me into the kitchen. He grabbed a tea towel and used it to dry my hair.
I stared ahead, taking deep painful breaths. “What am I going to do?”
“What we all do, Mia,” said Shay. “We fuck the pain away.”
“What if that doesn’t work?”
“Then we use pain,” he said.
Cameron’s words came back to me. “It’s what we do here,” he’d said, sitting beside me in the garden of Enthrall. “We control with pain. Balance pleasure with pain. Banish pain with pain.”
And in that upscale restaurant, Chez Polidor, Cameron had admitted he too was into pain.
It hit me like a lightning bolt.
Cameron was using his feelings for me to punish himself.
The realization stunned me into silence.
CHAPTER 33
NAKED IN THE center of the bedroom, my arms clutched to my chest, my breaths came short and sharp.
Christmas evening and all was still in the house.
Cameron was long gone, having caught his flight at Heathrow hours ago, and would be in mid-air by now. Shay continued to guard us discreetly from somewhere in the house.
Though Lance’s threat seemed like it was over now, wariness waited in the shadows, biding time until my thoughts lost their strength to block these memories that seeped in.
Richard ran his fingers through my hair. “Baby, we need to talk.”
I agreed with a nod.
“Tell me what those men did to you?”.
In the corner sat a big leather chair. The left foot was slightly crooked, buckling under years of people sitting in it. I wondered if Richard ever sat in it.
“Oberon Grove has a camera in every room,” he said softly. “Summer watched the footage.”
My gaze snapped to his.
“Cameron gave me Summer’s number,” he said. “I phoned her. She told me what happened to you.”
“The nest?” I shook my head. “I only watched the women. I didn’t do anything.”
“Nest?”
Oh, he wasn’t talking about that.
I stared off.
That crackling fire. That phone within reach. Those men in tuxes. The locking of a door…
“You’re here with me and you’re safe.” Richard raised my chin. “I know they touched you. You should feel no shame. You did nothing wrong.”
He pressed a fingertip to my lips. “You begged them to let you go.”
“They thought I wanted it to happen.”
“At Chrysalis, no means no. Use that word and all play stops.” He shook his head woefully. “Lance will pay.”
“How?”
“You don’t need to worry about that.”
“Please don’t do anything illegal.”
“He’s banned from Chrysalis and Enthrall. He’s banned from Oberon, and so is Helete.”
“Is their threat over?”
“Yes.”
“They won’t come after me again?”
“They have no reason to,” he said. “Cameron and Lance spoke on the phone this morning.” Richard pulled me into a hug. “It’s over.”
“Does that mean Shay won’t need to follow me around everywhere?”
“Once Cameron’s paranoia has lifted. For now you’ll still have someone watching over you.”
I wasn’t sure I liked the sound of that. My privacy had been compromised this entire trip. Going home knowing there were people out there following me around made me antsy.
I eased my collar away from my neck.
“Too tight?” Richard ran a finger beneath it.
“Hold me.”
He pulled me in and hugged me. “We’ll find our way back, Mia. And we’ll be stronger and more together than we ever were.”
“Yes.” I squeezed my eyes shut, needing this to be true.
He eased me back and grabbed my shoulders. “I’m going to heal what happened to you.” He strolled over to the chest of drawers and removed a lace blindfold. “Arms behind your back, please.”
He’d ordered me into the pose and I obeyed, my eyes fluttering with expectation, my heart scrambling for cover.
A swinging pendulum.
Above that fireplace in that room back at Oberon Grove had hung a painting of a fox hunt with men atop horses, their expressions proud, those dogs at their feet ready for the order to chase.
Ready to rip that fox apart.
Those men had hardly touched me yet my mind took me to the place where they had, betraying me with thoughts of what could have happened.
Richard scrolled down his phone and the sound of soft rolling waves came from it and filled the room.
“This is my way of taking you back to Malibu.” He secured the blindfold around my eyes. “I’m going to replace those thoughts. I’m going to bring you back to me. Can I make love to you?”
“Yes.”
Yes.
His mouth was on mine, firm but gentle, easing mine open. His tongue searched, explored, soothed.
Kisses, there were lots of kisses, and caressing. I swooned at the pleasure he brought, the suckling at my breasts, his teeth grazing my nipples, the pang below causing shivers.
He nudged me back and I toppled onto the bed.
Taking his time, he made love to me, planting soft kisses at my feet, his mouth leisurely moving from one toe to the next, moving upward, trailing between my thighs.
His mouth settled on my sex and his tongue flitted, circled, flicked.
Arching my back, I lifted my hips, offering more of me.
His body crushed against mine. “My cock has magic powers.” He nipped my ear.
“Is that right?” I giggled.
“Oh yes. May I provide a demonstration?”
“Why yes, sir.”
He whispered into my ear, “I’m going to erase the past.”
Gently, he positioned the tip of his cock at my entrance, his hips rocking so he tapped against me, rendering pleasure.
“Please,” I begged.
“Shush. Nice and slow, baby.”
Wrapping my legs around his hips, spellbound, I moved closer to edge of forgetting.
“Please, sir,” I whispered.
This gentle tapping, this easing inside, this stretching wide. He raised himself to change his angle and penetrate deeper, working himself inside me and reminding me once again he’d mastered the art of pleasuring a woman so very long ago. His ability to seduce was breathtaking.
While gliding in and out languidly, his mouth eased mine open. Our tongues battling, his for control, mine to prove he had it.
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Richard’s body trembled with the pressure of his closeness. This was him proving he knew what I needed, not violence, not punishment, not even domination, but love.
His breathing stilted as his time neared yet he continued on and on, focusing on my pleasure alone, goading me, grinding, circling.
I plunged into this sea of sensation. Ocean waves crashed around us. Their insistent rhythm seduced and I gave myself over, arching my back, feeling his warmth filling me as we went under together.
CHAPTER 34
ROLLING WAVES CRASHED over golden sands.
Turning slightly, I gazed up at the majestic Mediterranean styled house on the hill. The place Richard and I called home.
I was thrilled to be back in Malibu. I’d only returned two days ago and it felt wonderful.
London had been a whirlwind of time spent with Cameron, running from Lance Merrill, and trying to settle back as Richard’s sub. My head still spun with all that had happened. My heart, though battered and bruised, still felt capable of so much love.
A piece of me was missing and I couldn’t work out why.
I was not the same Mia who’d stood here on this beach looking out at the vast ocean all those weeks ago, wishing Richard would train me into the submissive he yearned for. During his beachfront party, I’d learned my fate. The news was delivered that I’d be given over to Cameron Cole, nudging my future in a dramatically different direction.
That same evening, Scarlet had joined me here on this very sand and had taken my breath away with her words of what it meant to serve a master, and more profound still her foreshadowing I was ready for Chrysalis.
Her stark prediction of how it would change me.
And it had.
Before I’d entered that great house, Cameron had warned me, his tone firm and menacing, ‘I will take you further than you have gone before. What will be left of you is that which you do not believe exists within you. I will destroy you. I will burn away this façade and I will reveal the true Mia.’
Changed forever.
It made me wonder if the outcome both he and Richard had expected had gone awry. Now my confidence soared, my self-respect was at an all time high, and my new passion had turned to philosophy.
These last few days had seen me tucked in a corner, a book open on my lap, devouring every word on every page, absorbing knowledge with newfound joy.
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