At last even they stopped and she told herself that she must pull herself together and face up to telling her parents. But it required too great an effort to move and so she lay there, very still, utter dejection in every line of her slim, tense body.
Tom, watching her silently from behind the shelter of a great oak, clenched his hands in the effort it needed to stay where he was. Every natural human instinct urged him to go to Lisa and do his best to comfort her, but that, he knew, was out of the question. For the moment at least, nothing and no one could help her except her own courage and pride. And for another, he knew Lisa too well ever to let her know he had seen her like this with all her defences down. That would humiliate her even more than she already was.
He swore softly under his breath, his hands clenching and unclenching. If Mark Saville had come along at that moment, it would have gone hard with him!
Then, as Lisa stirred slightly and he thought she might be getting up, he slipped silently back the way he had come.
Half an hour later, Lisa returned to the house, and though she was very pale, she had gained complete control of herself. Tom thanked his stars that he hadn't let her know of his presence, for now, unaided, she had taken the first and perhaps the most difficult step of the long, hard journey she had got to take if there was to be any future happiness for her. And that should do more for her self-respect than any amount of help from someone else could have done.
Yes, he was thankful, for her sake, but, he thought grimly, no one would ever know what torture it had been to stand aside and let her fight it out for herself.
Somehow or other Lisa contrived to keep up appearances. It wasn't easy, especially when she intercepted the anxious, loving expression in her mother's eyes, though that, she told herself, was only to be expected and one just had to grin and bear it.
But at least no one who mattered referred to what had happened. What, after all, was there to be said when, as she knew quite well, they were thankful that Mark had gone out of her life, though, as she had known would be the case, they grieved for her unhappiness.
For one thing, she was very, very grateful. Everyone conspired to keep her so busy that she had hardly a spare moment to think, which was just what she needed.
Not that it was always possible to forget. Memory played treacherous tricks. Something quite small and unimportant in itself would bring back a vivid mental picture of Mark, of his gay charm and the happiness they had shared. Or had Mark ever been really happy? Had he always had the fear in the background of his mind that though she attracted him, she might be a millstone round his neck when it came to achieving his ambitions? Perhaps, really, Mark should be pitied. To be torn two ways, knowing that it was impossible to gratify two such divergent desires—
And that she could find it in her heart to pity the man who had treated her so shabbily was, if only she had realized it, the turning point for Lisa. Nothing Mark could do now or anything she remembered about him would ever hurt so much again.
As far as Lisa knew, Mark never came back to the Manor again. Certainly she never saw him and at least he had the good taste not to seek her out. He had written to her once, a week after his marriage to Evadne. But what he had said Lisa had no idea. . For a long time she sat very still with the letter lying on the table before her. Then, without opening it, she burnt it. After all, there was nothing he could say that would make any difference.
After that, nothing except hard work—the harder the better, and the determination not to make a pest of herself to other people.
It worked out pretty well. Celia, short of a kennel-maid, asked her if she would fill in temporarily for a few hours a day, and in addition, without comment from either of them she slipped back into helping Tom during surgery hours. Occasionally, too, he asked her to come on his rounds, but always, as he made clear— and she realized it was the truth—because he needed her help. That being the case, she could go with him without any sense of being in his debt for giving her a break.
These trips were all the more enjoyable because Tom had at last bought a new car—a really new one, not just a good secondhand one—and though it wasn't in the same class as that white beauty that Mark had had, it was none the less extremely good. What was more, Tom let her drive it, which was pure joy.
But there was another aspect to the purchase which intrigued Lisa more than anything else.
'Tom,' she said thoughtfully one glorious day when the autumn tints of the trees were flaming in sunshine that would have done credit to midsummer, 'have you been left a legacy? Or won the pools or something?'
'Not so much as won a raffle at a charity bazaar,' Tom said cheerfully. 'Did you want a loan?'
'Of course not!' Lisa disclaimed energetically. 'But this car—she must have cost you quite a lot—'
'She did,' he agreed feelingly. 'Though, of course, I traded in the old one.'
'All the same—' Lisa pondered.
'Come on, out with it,' Tom encouraged. 'Not like you to pull your punches, least of all where I'm concerned!'
'No, perhaps not,' Lisa agreed. 'Well, it's just this, Tom—I know you well enough to be sure that you wouldn't have bought it if you hadn't known you could afford it.'
'Quite right,' Tom acknowledged. 'So—?'
'Just—' she began tentatively, 'it made me think that having another vet in the district hasn't affected your practice as much as you thought it might.'
'No, it hasn't,' Tom replied, though without any sign of the satisfaction he might have reasonably felt. 'Actually, I've met with an astonishing degree of loyalty. There have been the few backsliders, of course, but not enough to matter. At least, not to me. It's Enderby I feel sorry for. Because, what with people sticking to me and this having been a summer singularly free from animal epidemics, he simply can't be building up his practice at all! And not only was that something I'm reasonably sure he was told he'd be able to do, but a certain person isn't going to be willing to subsidize him indefinitely without any results!'
'No,' Lisa said slowly. 'As a matter of fact, I've been wondering if, since his illness, Mr Cosgrave is very much interested in anything very much. One doesn't see anything of him, and he certainly doesn't seem interested in local affairs.'
'Poor chap, I don't think he's got what it takes these days to be interested in anything,' Tom said compassionately. 'I met Mrs Cosgrave a day or so ago and—' he shook his head.
'Just what did she say, Tom?' Lisa asked. 'I—I always liked her, you know—'
'Same here,' Tom said gruffly. 'Even if she does at times seem rather a twitterpate! Well, as far as I can remember she said that goodness knew she'd give any thing for Simon to get better—and she meant it. There were tears in her eyes. And then she went on to say that all the same, it was a long time since he had needed her as he did now and that it meant something to him as well as to her that they were together again, if I knew what she meant.'
'I'm glad,' Lisa said softly. 'Truly glad, Tom.'
'So am I, though as a matter of fact, I don't quite know why—yes, I do. Your people have never lost one another, Lisa. But the Cosgraves had. Now, as she said, they're together again. It—it boosts one's faith in the married state, and heaven knows, these days, that's all to the good.'
Neither of them found anything to say for a while and then Lisa, realizing that they were approaching the Ranstead kennels, asked him to drop her off.
'Celia can always do with a hand just about now,' she explained.
'Yes, but how will you get back?' Tom wanted to know.
'Oh, Celia will run me back. Or I could walk, if it comes to that,' Lisa said easily.
'Well, all right, but give me a ring if you get stuck,' Tom insisted.
Lisa promised, but with the mental reservation that she would take care not to get stuck. She had no right to depend on Tom to get her out of difficulties.
She made her way to Celia's trim little office, but stopped short of going in. The door was ajar and it was impossible not to h
ear the angry voices speaking on the other side of the door. One was Celia's and the other Lisa recognized as Robin Enderby's.
'I told you before and I tell you again,' Celia said furiously, 'no, no, no ! Quite apart from anything else, I'll never have any use for a man who—'
'You don't give a chap a chance,' Robin interrupted bitterly. 'Even a known criminal isn't condemned without a fair trial, but you—' his voice cracked disparagingly.
'All right,' Celia retorted indifferently, 'so you're not a knave. Then you must be a fool! You were to have believed a story that shouldn't have deceived a child of five! Well, all right, if that's what you want me to credit. But it doesn't make any difference. Either way, I've—'
'No use for me,' Robin finished the sentence for her. 'All right, you've said enough! I've got the message, and I won't trouble you any more. You can rely on that!'
'Good!' Celia said crisply. 'So there doesn't seem to be anything else to say, does there?'
The door was flung violently open and Robin blundered out, nearly knocking Lisa over. He apologized to her in a dazed sort of way, but she didn't think he really knew who she was.
After a moment's hesitation, she went into the office. Celia was sitting at her desk, her head buried in her arms. She stirred instantly at the sound of Lisa's footsteps and jumped up.
'How long have you been here?' she demanded.
'A few minutes,' Lisa was forced to confess.
'In which case, I suppose you heard the row Robin and I were having?' She laughed harshly and shrugged. 'Oh well, it doesn't matter. It's about time someone gave that young man a telling off! He's still got far too good an opinion of himself. What did you come for?'
The somewhat blunt question rather surprised Lisa, and she cordially wished that she hadn't come.
'To see if I could lend you a hand for an hour or so.'
'No, I don't think so,' Celia said indifferently. 'But you might take a message to Tom for me.'
'Yes?' Lisa asked, wondering why she felt reluctant to do such a simple thing.
Celia considered.
'No, after all, I'll telephone him,' she decided. 'I can make things clearer.'
'Then if I can't be of any use, I'll go,' Lisa said, glad to make her escape from the still overcharged air of the office. Celia didn't reply. She was standing staring out of the window, and Lisa was not at all sure that she had heard her speak.
Janet, the Bellairs' oldest daughter, had expected that her new baby would arrive about the middle of November. Instead of that, the new little Miss Vernon elected to put in an appearance in the last week of October. As a result, all Janet's plans for having someone in to run the house and look after the family were useless. Miss Laidlaw, the retired nurse who had been going to take over, was elsewhere on a similar engagement and couldn't, of course, leave her present charge.
There was really only one thing for it. Lisa must step into the breach, which she did willingly not only because she was glad to help Janet out, but also because it would be a relief to get away from Addingly for a time. Of course Janet knew all about Mark, but Lisa could reasonably hope that she would be concerned with her own affairs that her sister's wouldn't seem of paramount importance.
So Lisa drove up to Oxfordshire with no other anxieties than having to leave her mother to cope with the household duties which she herself usually undertook.
'But she has promised to be sensible,' Lisa reassured herself as the miles ticked steadily away. 'And Mrs Thacker will keep an eye on her. And it will be a relief not to have people looking at me to see how I'm making out! It's like the way we used to dig seeds up to see if they were sprouting, and so often, killed them doing it!' she sighed. 'If only, when I come back, all that was forgotten! If only there was no one left to remind people—the Cosgraves and, yes, Robin Enderby—'
But at least, once she reached Janet's home, she herself forgot all about everything except the immediate needs of the situation. When John had rushed Janet off to the hospital early that morning a neighbour had taken charge of the two older children, Jenny, aged five and Roger, coming up for three. They hurled themselves into Lisa's arms, bursting with the news that they had a baby sister, and demanding to be taken to see her at once.
It took a considerable amount of both patience and tact to convince them that they'd have to wait just a little while before they could do that, and the neighbour laughed sympathetically.
'You're going to have your hands full!' she prophesied.
And Lisa did! The house to run, unfamiliar shops to deal at, one child to take to school and collect and the other to keep entertained—Lisa wasn't at all sure that she had time to breathe, but she contrived to plan her days with a rhythm which enabled her to take on the additional duties entailed when Janet and her baby came home in her stride.
Janet was apologetic.
'It's putting such an awful lot on you!'
'Don't you worry,' Lisa insisted. 'For the first time in my life I feel really indispensable! As a matter of fact, I'm getting a swelled head on that account! Besides, I'm thoroughly enjoying myself, aren't I, my angel?' she crooned.
And if there was an ache in her heart as she kissed Miss Vernon's soft, newly minted cheek, not even Janet should guess it.
When, in due course, Miss Laidlaw was free to come and take charge, Lisa was, in fact, reluctant to leave. Janet's was such a young home, full of laughter and bustle and with such a sense of looking forward. There was nothing of that in her own home, and the feeling was exaggerated when she reached there because both her father and mother were out, and though she had known they would be, the silence had a chilling effect on her.
Still, it was no good bothering about that! She must get herself something to eat—
She had just gone into the kitchen when she heard a door bang and went out to the hall just as Tom came out from his quarters.
'Lisa, how nice!' he said, taking both her hands in his. 'How long have you been back?'
'Not more than a quarter of an hour,' she told him. 'But, Tom, I am glad to see you! After Janet's house, I felt like the last pea rattling about in the pod here, particularly with Mother and Father out.'
'Yes, they were sorry about that, but I promised I'd get back early. I say, Lisa,' he added coaxingly, 'I suppose you couldn't knock up a bit of a meal for me? I missed lunch—'
'So did I,' Lisa replied. 'At least, I had a sandwich, but that seems to have vanished! Bacon and eggs?'
'Heaven!' Tom applauded. 'Just wait until I've washed and I'll be with you!'
He went off whistling cheerfully and it seemed quite suddenly to Lisa that the clock had been turned back to those days before Mark had come into her life. She remembered especially that glorious May morning when she had got up early and Tom hadn't been to bed at all. They'd had bacon and eggs then and had been completely at their ease with one another as they had never been since—until now.
She heard Tom returning and bustled energetically about her preparations, uneasy lest he should somehow read her thoughts and be able to interpret them more coherently than she herself could.
To her relief, however, Tom immediately began to make enquiries about Janet and the new arrival, and when that topic of conversation was exhausted, Lisa had regained her poise sufficiently to introduce another.
'And what's been happening in Addingly since I went away?' she asked as she put two well filled plates on the table.
'This looks good!' Tom commented approvingly, and then, casually, as he sat down: 'Oh—Addingly! Well, this and that, you know. Mrs Blewett came to see me almost in tears. Her sailor brother who gave her the parrot paid her a visit and he evidently found time hanging on his hands, because he taught the creature some really shocking words! So bad that most of the time Mrs Blewett keeps a cover over the cage, particularly if there are callers. Only unfortunately when the Rector called, the cover somehow slipped off and—'
Lisa dissolved into helpless laughter and Tom grinned.
'Yes, t
hat's just what Mr Thacker did—laughed! And that shocked Mrs Blewett even worse than the parrot had!'
'I do like Addingly,' Lisa said appreciatively. 'Things happen that wouldn't anywhere else. Anything else, Tom?'
'Well, the Cosgraves are leaving the Manor,' Tom replied, and Lisa was quite sure that he was carefully avoiding her eyes. 'Going back to a cottage in the village they both lived in at the time they got married. Mrs Cosgrave's idea, I think, but she can't do anything wrong in his eyes these days, so that's all right.'
Lisa nodded. There really didn't seem anything to say to that.
'Anything else?'
'You're absolutely insatiable,' Tom grumbled. 'But —well, yes, there is one other thing, if it interests you. I'm going abroad for three months or so.'
'You're what!' Lisa exclaimed, her knife and fork clattering on to her plate.
'Going abroad,' Tom repeated in rather a blurred way because his mouth was full.
'But your practice!' Lisa protested. 'Whatever will happen to that?'
'Oh, my partner will look after that,' Tom explained, helping himself to more toast.
'Your partner!' Lisa echoed blankly.
'Oh, didn't I tell you?' Tom asked casually. 'Yes, I've decided it's time I had one.' He paused as he chased an elusive piece of bacon round his plate. 'Particularly as I had a chance to get a really good chap. Robin Enderby, as a matter of fact!'
CHAPTER 10
'Robin Enderby!' Lisa repeated incredulously.
Tom grinned at her.
'You know, Lisa, if you're not careful, you'll get like Mrs Blewett's parrot! You've simply repeated everything I've said.'
'Well, you've surprised me so much,' Lisa defended herself. 'I mean, Robin Enderby, of all people, when you know perfectly well why he came here! How can you possibly trust him, particularly if you're going to be away for months?'
Next Door to Romance Page 17