by Meisha Camm
“I rang the doorbell three times. Are you going to open the door?” Charlotte banged on the window.
“Sorry, I’m not thinking straight. I’ll be right there,” I said.
“What’s going on?” Charlotte demanded, walking into the house.
“Jarrad is married with two kids.”
“What?” Charlotte said, her mouth wide open.
Maria hugged me. “That bastard.”
Jarrad ran over my heart with a cement truck. I felt as if I couldn’t even breathe. Putting my head in between my legs didn’t help trying to get the gigantic monkey off my back.
“Did you try calling him?” Maria asked, pacing the floor.
“About eleven times. Only getting the voice mail.”
“Give me the phone. I’m going to call until stupid ass picks up.
“It won’t be necessary. We’re going to see him tonight.”
“What do you mean, we? I don’t have any money for a plane ticket, and my tank is almost on empty,” Charlotte explained.
“I booked three first-class tickets to Baltimore with his credit card. He put me on the account as a signer. Jarrad will be so pleased to know I racked up fifteen hundred dollars in a click of a button. We all know plane tickets aren’t cheap on short notice. I may run up his card even more for the hell of it. I hear Baltimore has plenty of restaurants to dine at.”
Chapter 31
At 10:15 p.m., we arrived on Jarrad’s stomping ground, catching a cab to the studio. It was too late for apologies. He’s going to pay for hurting me. I kept going over our relationship looking for any signs that I’d missed. Jarrad was smooth. I couldn’t recall a bump in the road.
I guess because it was so much easier having your women living in different states.
The security guard was smoking a cigarette outside. We patiently waited for him to walk around to the other side of the building.
“Okay, people, that’s a wrap. I’ll see you in the morning, bright and early.” Jarrad rubbed his temples then headed to his office and closed the door. He looked tired and worn down from the day, walking down the hall. Days like this, a glass of wine and a massage released all of the tension in his body.
“Let’s stomp the damn door down,” Maria suggested, her left foot in position with a medium-size boom box in her hand.
“No.” I approached the door. “I want him to pee in his pants when I drop the bomb.”
Charlotte looked at Maria. “Why do you have that boom box?”
“To play Alex’s anthem song. Music will help her get into the mood of kicking a man’s behind.”
“What’s the song of choice?”
“Ring the Alarm, by R&B singer Beyoncé Knowles.” Maria sang, “Ring the alarm, I’ve been doing this too long, but I’ll be damned if I see another chick on your arm . . .”
After hearing those words, I pounded on Jarrad’s door.
“Barry, not now, after I make a phone call, and I’m going—” He stood stunned at the door.
“Surprise, surprise.” I had a devilish smirk on my face.
“Alex, baby, Maria, Charlotte, what a surprise. After the day I had, I’m glad to see your gorgeous face. Since the gang is all here, why don’t we go out to Red Snapper to have a bite to eat?” He hugged me.
“You never know when I’ll pop up. I’m starving, myself, but can I invite a few more friends?” I asked.
“That’s fine. Who else will be coming along?”
“Tina, Renee, and Jarrad Junior.” I held up the picture in his face.
Jarrad backed up against the drawer, in shock.
“Baby, it’s not—”
“What? It’s not what I think? You bastard, you’ve been married for sixteen years. When were you going to bother telling me?” I smacked him in the face.
“Tina and I are separated.”
“Save it. Don’t you ever say her name in my presence. You know what I went through as a child with my father and you betray me like this?” I said, hesitating to pull out my pocketknife. He’s not even worth getting charges.
“Maria, Charlotte, do you mind if Alex and I can talk about this matter in private?”
Maria turned the music up even louder.
“They’re not going anywhere. Stay away from me, you worthless piece of dog shit. I came here because I wanted to see if you would tell me the truth, with the fucking picture in my hand. If you deny your damn wife and kids, then you will deny me too.” I screamed with all my might and punched him in the face.
He wiped the blood from his mouth. “Please let me explain.”
“I’m finished here. Ladies, let’s go.” I looked down at my bloody knuckles. I walked out with my head high, wondering how long the feelings of pain and betrayal would last.
I was in no mood to be dining out, so we racked up an additional one hundred and fifty dollars in room service. I ordered two of every item we wanted.
Dessert is on its way with a piece of chocolate cake and an ice cream sundae.
“I’m all right,” I said, picking over a Caesar salad. I barely touched my steamed shrimp.
Maria rubbed my shoulder. “Let it out.”
“Believe me, I’m all cried-out. Our flight leaves tomorrow evening. Shopping does a body good. Let’s hit the streets bright and early. If I can’t kill him, I can certainly put a dent in his pockets. His dumb ass is probably worried if I’ll tell his wife. Hmm, she may already know.” What does she look like? Do we favor each other? Is she prettier than me? Is she a doctor as well?
“What if she doesn’t? Don’t you think it’s our duty as women to tell her?” Charlotte asked, wiping her mouth with a napkin.
“No, as far I’m concerned, she needs to find out on her own, just like Alex did. She isn’t her friend, but the other woman.” Maria sat back in her seat.
“I have nothing to say to Tina.” I sighed.
“Besides, I would look stupid confronting her. She’s the one who’s married to him. I was just the unknowing chick on the side, which makes me feel even worse. Worst of all, I’m a wreck and if I had an exam tomorrow, I wouldn’t be prepared. Jarrad has my mind so gone, I can’t even study.”
Chapter 32
Maria moved out of my old house and got her own place. Nine hundred and fifty dollars a month does a checkbook good. The new tenants were working out fine so far. One missed payment and their asses will be out on the street the next day. I’d signed the paperwork stating my rules and regulations. Tonight, I threw her a housewarming party for one purpose. Friends and family would be buying the blender, George Foreman grill, and other kitchen and living room items that she needed. “When are you going to talk to Jarrad?” Charlotte asked, placing the cake back in its box.
“I’m supposed to see him tomorrow, but I’m not sure what I want to do. I’m not ready to deal with it. Out of sight of out of mind is much easier for me to deal with.”
“He probably wants to talk and get his stuff back. Besides, I’m tired of him blowing up my phone whining about you. If Bobby didn’t know any better, he would think I was stepping out on him.”
“I second that notion. Caller ID is the best invention,” Maria said, taking a bite out of a lime chip.
“Jarrad shouldn’t be calling either one of you. Men don’t think. Your loyalty lies with me, so why would he even think he can get answers out of you? You tell him what I want to say, or you tell him nothing at all.”
“That’s right.”
His shit was thrown in the dumpster, except for the cut-up pieces sprinkled over the lawn. Unfortunately, he was unable to pick up his things. Jarrad should’ve remembered the trash man was coming to collect the next day.
“It’s been three weeks, since I’ve uttered a word to him. I will let him say his piece, but in a neutral place where people are around, so I won’t get weak in the knees.”
“Why not your house?”
“That ass won’t be crossing my doorstep anytime soon.”
Chapter 33
> It was a warm April day. When I pulled up, children were running along the boardwalk. Couples, young and old, were holding hands. Others were bicycling. Some were catching waves in the salty ocean. The orange-red sun appeared to be melting down into the water. I loved this time of the day. Sunday was a day to relax and get a little of “me time.” I was a young chick, but I loved to listen to 92.3, the oldies-but-goodies station.
I was singing along to one of my favorite Billie Holiday songs when he caressed my shoulder. I looked down at my shoulder and then up at him.
“Hello?”
“May I have a seat?” Jarrad rubbed the back of his head. He looked as if he hadn’t slept in days. His eyes were bloodshot red, and he was in desperate need of a clean shave.
“I prefer you stand. I prefer that you don’t touch me. Thank you.”
“All right, have it your way. It’s not what you think. I apologize for the lies and deception. I messed up. I never meant to hurt you.”
“Don’t ever say that. Those are my father’s infamous words whenever he screws a new ho. Why didn’t you tell me? You wasted my time. I could have been with someone else.”
“Are you with someone else?”
“Do you go home to your wife?” Jarrad stood there speechless. “Yeah, that’s what I thought.”
“Listen, I don’t want to argue with you. Yes, I’m married, but getting separated.”
“I thought you were separated.”
“When you have children, it’s not as easy as you think to just pack up and leave.”
“Jarrad, you’re not leaving your children, you’re leaving her.”
“You’re not in my shoes, so you don’t know how I feel.”
He has a point, I thought.
Jarrad continued, “I met Tina in high school. She became pregnant. I had to do the right thing. End of story.”
“You have two children with her. She’s given sixteen years to you. I’m not going to end up like her ever.” I crossed my arms.
“We got married too young. I didn’t know what I wanted until I met you in the candy store. My heart stopped when I saw you.”
“You really need to come up with new material. Is this the first time you’ve ever cheated on her?”
“Yes, I swear.”
Lying ass. “You hurt me. We’re over. I don’t want you. End of story.”
“Tina and I are eventually getting divorced. I know I don’t deserve it, but please give me another chance to make things up to you. I’m in love with you. Here’s a copy of a lease that I just signed for an apartment in Baltimore. I want to be with you. It will take time, but I will regain your trust back.”
“I don’t know if I can do this,” I said weeping.
“We’ll build our relationship back together. Let’s take one day at a time.” He took my hand and motioned me to get out of the car.
“Don’t ever hurt me again. Do you hear me? Next time, I won’t let you off so easy.”
“There won’t be a next time,” he whispered, putting his arm around me.
We walked on the boardwalk for what seemed to be a few moments. Before we knew it, the stars were shining bright, and the temperature dropped. Goose bumps were popping up on my arms and legs. Jarrad placed his jacket around me. We found a secluded spot and made love, give-it-to-me-all-night-good lovin’, that is. I didn’t care who was looking or if the police caught us. I loved Jarrad with all my heart and wanted desperately to make the relationship work. Plus, he licked my pussy so good, making me shiver in pleasure every time.
As I watched the stars come out, I began to wonder if this was my crossroads to get out of this relationship. Would Jarrad go ahead and get the divorce, or would he just string me along for a ride and hurt me over and over again? Not knowing was killing me.
Chapter 34
As I strolled into the living room, I saw Pop rummaging through his pocket and a Trojan condom wrapper fell out. I walk away each time I catch him on the phone whispering or notice a collar with a speck of lipstick on it that isn’t my mother’s. He gave me a look of guilt.
Over the years, I’d learned to turn the other cheek, hoping he would change his ways before Ma got fed up. Ma begged me to be over at the house seven p.m. to enjoy an evening with the parents of Jason’s girlfriend, Brenda. I liked Brenda, the rare times I saw her. She was a sweet girl, with a face that looked so familiar.
Ma was cooking up a storm. Right now, I couldn’t take any kinds of odors, due to a sensitive nose. Last week, I’d found out I was pregnant. I had no excuse, especially since I was in medicine to specialize in obstetrics and gynecology. The only soul I told was Jarrad.
On top of feeling nauseated, I was scared and tired. Worst of all, my breasts itched like crazy and felt like they weighed a ton of bricks. I wasn’t ready to be responsible for another human being for the next eighteen to twenty years.
Jason was dragging me by the hand, not to embarrass him. I knew my brother. He really liked this girl and talked about her all the time. Jason even dragged me out a couple of times to pick out gifts for her.
“Boy, get off of me. I won’t do anything to embarrass your manhood,” I teased him, skipping to the door.
“You have skeletons in your closet too. I’ll tell Ma.”
“Try me. Your Black Tail magazines and the Playboy Channel will come out of your closet. You’re dealing with a pro. Don’t fuck with me. Remember, I don’t live here, but you do.”
“All right, all right.” He adjusted his tie.
“Relax. You’ll be fine. It’s dinner, not a job interview.”
Fifteen minutes later, the doorbell rang. I opened the door to have Connie Maddox staring in my face. She had aged a bit, but I never forgot those high cheekbones or the Diamond fragrance she wore.
Her whorish incident came gushing back to my mind, once Ma came to the door. Why can’t I just slam the door in her face? If I let her stay, we can all have a group discussion about what happened that Sunday day at Serenity Baptist Church.
“Hi, please come on in. Let me take your jackets,” Ma said.
I wasn’t saying anything. Yet.
“Would you like anything to drink Mr. and Mrs. Hodges? How about you Brenda? Dinner is waiting on us hot out of the oven,” Pop offered, a stupid look on his face. He knew Ma and I were good for remembering faces.
The church ho got married. I looked for her wedding ring on her left hand to make sure. After the incident, Ms. Maddox had stopped coming to the church altogether. I probably embarrassed her. I smiled to myself. “Yes. May I have a glass of water?” Mrs. Hodges cleared her throat. “My throat is dry.”
“Follow me into the dining room,” I said, eyeing her down. My distorted facial expression made her realize that I remembered too.
“Alex, can you help me in the kitchen, please?” Ma suggested.
“Sure.”
Ma turned around to make sure no one was in earshot. “Don’t ruin this for Jason. He really likes Brenda. No, I don’t care for her mother either. What she did was a long time ago. I put the fear of God in her sixteen years ago, which still lingers in her mind.”
“I’ll do my best,” I said, placing the rolls in a basket.
Ma and I brought out the entrée and its sides and filled everyone’s glass with water or tea.
“Robert, the blessing, please.” Ma took her seat and placed the cloth napkin across her lap.
“Father, let us give thanks for this meal, bless the hands that prepared it, and let us have a wonderful fellowship with the Hodges and their lovely daughter. Amen.”
“What’s for dinner?” Jason asked, picking up the tossed salad.
“Baked chicken,” Ma told him.
“Mrs. Hodges would you care for a breast?” I asked, the plate of chicken in my hand.
“No. Two legs will be fine.” She squealed as she knocked over her glass of tea with lemon.
Chapter 35
I liked getting down in the bedroom and had a healthy sex drive. After
the abortion, I was advised to wait two weeks and have a checkup before having sex.
Unfortunately, Jarrad held out two more weeks because he wanted my insides to be intact. If I found out he was getting it on with his soon-to-be ex-wife it would’ve been over for good.
I went online and gained insightful information about divorces in the state of Virginia. Tina could be entitled to at least half of Jarrad’s small fortune. Sixteen years was a long time. I wondered, Did Jarrad consult a lawyer yet? Four days earlier, I’d asked him if he filed papers for separation. He informed me that he had to wait ninety days, according to his lawyer. Jarrad must’ve thought I was stupid. He should never underestimate Alexis Gibbs. He was playing this role where he was acting clueless about divorce, but I knew he was fully aware of what was going on. Tired of him hiding behind his words, I wanted to see some action.
“Where’s my dinner?” Jarrad joked, throwing his keys on the counter.
I was letting him hold the new key for now, but things were going to turn ugly if he acted up. Besides, the security code wasn’t up for negotiation.
“Greet me the same way I greet you. Vegetable lasagna is in the oven. I already made the salad. You can help by cutting up the French bread and spreading butter on the slices.” I playfully hit him in the chest.
“You know who run things around here.”
“Don’t get kicked in your face. You better shut up, or you’ll be telling the people on your payroll, ‘Man down, man down, help. She beat me!’ My emotions are on a rollercoaster. I’m horny. Words of advice—You better ride the fuck wave until it collapses on shore. Now drop those pants and give me every bit of forty-five minutes.” I pinned him to the kitchen wall.
“Talkin’ dirty. Hmm . . . I’m horny all ready,” he whispered, unbuckling his pants, revealing the bulging penis coming straight for my G-spot.