“Danki.” It was good to have the support of the current teacher, but would the men on the board give weight to Leah’s wishes?
Leah kept an eye on the children at play. “It would be unusual for the board not to give the position to someone from this district, but ultimately they must keep the best interest of the children in mind. Samuel’s niece has only recently moved here. Sally grew up in this district, but she has something of a flighty disposition, although she always means well.”
“I am a newcomer, too.”
Leah smiled. “That may be true, but no one would call you flighty. It takes a firm hand to keep a school full of children in line. Do you have a firm hand?”
“I guess I won’t know until I’m put to the test. The children are going to miss you, Leah.”
“And I will miss them. It’s a wonderful, rewarding career if God chooses that path for you, Clara. I pray He will. I would enjoy having you apprentice with me for the first few months of the school year.”
Clara knew an inexperienced teacher learned her job working alongside the current teacher rather than through more education. It made the transition much easier for the students and for the new teacher. Clara suspected that having Leah show her the ropes would make a challenging job much more enjoyable.
“In the meantime, I have taken a position helping Ethan Gingerich take care of his two nephews and his niece while he is working. Do you know him?
“I’ve seen him, but I haven’t actually met him. I did hear about his brother’s and his sister-in-law’s deaths and how Ethan took their children in. I’m glad he has found someone to look after them. How old are they?”
“Lily is four, Amos is five and Micah is eight.”
“So only Micah will be in school this year. How are they doing after such a terrible loss?”
“That’s something that I wanted to talk to you about. Lily and Amos are doing as well as can be expected, but Micah isn’t. The boy is often angry. He can be sweet, but at the drop of a hat, he becomes moody and belligerent. I’m afraid I’m at my wit’s end trying to make a real connection with him.”
“I’m sorry to hear that, but it’s not surprising.”
“How do I handle it?”
“Our teachers’ newsletter, The Bulletin Board, has some very good suggestions for dealing with a grieving child. I’ll let you borrow them.”
“That would be great.”
“You need to remember that children grieve differently than adults. A child may go from crying one minute to playing the next. Playing can be a defense mechanism.”
“Like a boy swinging a baseball bat and hitting eggs?”
Leah frowned slightly. “The oldest one?”
Clara nodded.
“It’s also normal for them to act out, to feel depressed, even guilty, or angry at the one who has died, or at someone else entirely.”
“Micah seems angry at the whole world.”
“How old did you say he was?”
“Eight.”
“At that age, he will understand that death is final. The younger children may think it is temporary and that the person will come back. Micah may be acting out because he has difficulty talking about his feelings. He may be worried about his own death or feel that he is to blame for the death of his parents, somehow. He’s probably worried about who will take care of him and his siblings if something happens to their onkel.”
“That makes sense. I think he feels he’ll be left alone. He overheard Ethan’s two aunts say they would each take one of the younger children, but neither of them wanted to take him.”
“The poor child. I’m sure he feels powerless and vulnerable. You need to get him to express his fears and help him understand that in our Amish society, people will step up to take care of him and his siblings, for God commands us to care for orphans and widows. Reassure him that God’s plan for us is much larger than we can see, but His love is always with us.”
“I’ve tried to do that.”
“Make sure that their onkel is part of the conversation. As their parent now, he is responsible for helping them cope. His faith is an example for them to follow.”
“That’s part of the problem, too. Ethan doesn’t feel that he can be a parent. He doesn’t believe he can replace his brother.”
“Then you need to get him to talk about his grief, too. Without his support, it will be much harder for the children.”
“I’m not sure how to broach the matter. I’m simply the hired girl.” A hired girl who spent far too much time thinking about her handsome employer.
“You will manage. I know you will. Speaking of the school board, I believe I see Eli coming this way. Maybe you’re about to hear if you got the job.”
The school board president, Eli Imhoff, was walking purposefully toward them. Clara chewed the bottom corner of her lip. She did still want the job, didn’t she?
Of course she did. Ethan and his children were a temporary summer position. She needed something to support herself for years to come. She glanced at the children playing around them. To always be surrounded by children was a dream she wasn’t willing to give up.
Eli nodded to the two women. “Good Sunday to you both. Clara, I wanted to let you know the board has decided to interview each of the candidates one more time. Will Tuesday the fifteenth work for you?”
“That is fine for me. What time?” Was a second interview a good thing or a bad thing?
“Seven o’clock at the home of Wayne Mast. Leah, will you be able to be there, too?”
“Of course. It’s taking a rather long time for the board to come to a decision.”
“Replacing you is a difficult task, Leah. It is not something we wish to rush into. I will see you both then.” He turned and walked away.
Leah smiled at Clara. “It sounds like we will have our answer before the end of the month. I hope so, anyway.”
Clara managed a smile, but she wasn’t as excited as she thought she would be. In a few weeks, her life could take another drastic turn.
* * *
Ethan arrived at Clara’s grandfather’s farm just after sunup with the children crowded around him on the small bench of his logging arch. Clara came as far as the front gate to greet them, but she couldn’t bring herself to walk past the huge horses. Ethan noticed her hesitation. “They are as tame as your grandfather’s lambs.”
“I will take your word for it,” she said from the safety of the fenced yard.
Micah jumped down, followed by Amos. Lily held on to Ethan’s arm, and he slowly lowered her to the ground. “You behave for Clara today.”
“We will,” Lily and Amos said together. Micah nodded.
“Can we come watch you chop down trees?” Amos asked.
“If Clara wants to bring you out, that will be fine,” Ethan said.
It was her chance to spend more time with him. Clara realize how pathetic it was, but she jumped at it. “We will bring you lunch today and have a picnic up at the lake.”
He smiled brightly at her and her heart fluttered wildly inside her chest. “That sounds great. Just make sure you don’t come too close until I know you are there. I wouldn’t want to drop a tree on one of you.”
Lily covered her kapp with both hands. “I don’t want a tree on my head.”
“We’ll be careful,” Clara assured him as she opened the gate to let the children come in.
He touched the brim of his hat. “Until later, then.” He spoke softly to the team, and they took off at a trot.
For Clara, the morning passed slowly. The children went willingly with Greta as she did her chores and took care of the sheep. Clara spent the morning preparing a picnic lunch and baking a cherry cobbler because she knew Ethan would like it.
Finally, the hands of the clock moved to n
oon. Clara gathered her packed picnic basket and blanket and called to the children. They all came running. Amos tried to see into her basket. “What’s for lunch? Is that cherry cobbler I smell?”
She pushed the lid shut and started across the pasture with the boys trailing behind her “You will find out what I have made when we reach your onkel.”
Lily stayed by her side. When the boys were out of earshot, she tugged on Clara’s apron. “Is there cherry cobbler?”
“Ja, but don’t tell the boys. It’s our secret.”
“Okay.”
Lily’s bright smile made Clara’s heart contract with love. As much as she might want to remain unattached to the children, it simply wasn’t possible.
It took twenty minutes to reach the lake. The boys ran down to the shoreline and began skipping stones across the still surface of the water as Clara and Lily rested on a flat rock. After a little while, she called them together and they started along the path that skirted the edge of the lake. Micah, who had run ahead of them, suddenly shouted for her. “Clara, look what I found.”
She rounded a bend in the path and saw him peering into one end of a fallen log. “You found the letter tree.”
“No, I found a fishing rod.” He pulled a red fiberglass rod and silver reel from inside the trunk and held it up.
“It belongs to Joann Weaver.”
Micah tipped his head. “How do you know?”
“I know because I have heard the story.”
“What story?” Lily asked.
“About a year ago, Joann lost her new fishing pole in the lake. Someone else fished it out. His name was Roman. He left the pole leaning against this log with a note for the owner if he returned. Joann comes here to fish often. She found the note along with her fishing pole and she was so happy that she wrote a thank-you letter and left it here. They continued to write to each other and leave the letters here in the tree.
“Now, Joann and Roman worked together at the same place, but they didn’t really like each other. It wasn’t until they discovered they had been pen pals that things changed for them. They still come here to fish.”
“Did they get to be friends?” Amos asked.
Clara smiled. “They got to be much more than friends. They fell in love and they got married. Joann still keeps her pole here so she can go fishing whenever she can get away.”
“That’s a dumb story,” Micah said.
“Why do you think it’s a dumb story?” Clara asked him.
“Because it is.” He put the fishing pole back.
“I like the story,” Lily said.
“I like it, too. We should get going. Your onkel is probably getting hungry.” Clara held out her hand to Lily.
Lily gazed at her with a solemn expression. “Are you going to get married?”
“I don’t know. If it is God’s plan for me, then I will. If He wants me to be a teacher, then I will stay single.”
The idea of marriage used to terrify her even more than Ethan’s big horses. Only recently had the thought of spending her life with one man stopped frightening her. She knew Ethan was the reason. She wasn’t frightened of him. In fact, she thought about him all the time.
“Onkel Ethan is never going to get married, and neither am I,” Micah said.
“What makes you think your onkel won’t marry?” she asked with a frown.
“I heard Mamm and Daed talking about it once.” Micah fell into step beside her on the path.
Clara knew she shouldn’t encourage the child to gossip, but she wanted to know everything about Ethan. “What did your mamm and daed say?”
“Daed said that Jenny broke Ethan’s heart because she wouldn’t marry him so he had to move away. Mamm said that he would get over his broken heart, but Daed said Onkel Ethan wasn’t the kind of fellow who would get over something like that. He’s the kind of fellow who only loves one woman in his life.”
“I hope your papa was wrong about that. I hope your onkel Ethan finds a woman who will make him happy and who will be a good mother to all of you.”
Lily tugged on Clara’s hand. “Why don’t you marry Onkel Ethan? Then you could be our mother.”
Micah spun around, his face twisted with fury. “She can’t be our mother! We only had one mother, and God took her away from us. She’s dead. Papa is dead. They are never coming back.”
Lily burst into tears. Horrified, Clara scooped her into her arms. “Oh, Micah, I never meant to imply that someone could replace your mother. I know that isn’t possible. I’m sorry if you thought that was what I meant.”
“I hate God. I hate Him for taking them away. Why didn’t He take us with them so we could all stay together?” Tears were rolling down his cheeks. His small frame was shaking. Amos stood to one side looking confused and scared.
Clara patted Lily’s back to soothe her. “I don’t know why, Micah. I only know that God loves us and that He has things that He wants us to do in this life. Your parents are waiting to see you again. You must do your best to live a life that will make your mother and father happy.”
He pressed both hands to his eyes. “I want to know why!”
She knelt in front of him and laid a hand on his shoulder. To her surprise, he didn’t shake it off. “We can’t understand God’s ways. We can only have faith in His love for us.”
“I miss them so much.” He flung himself into Clara’s arms, nearly knocking her over. She hung on to him and to Lily, wishing she could offer them greater comfort but knowing all she could do was hold them. She glanced at Amos and smiled at him. “Come here. We all need to hug each other.”
The boy threw his arms around her neck and hung on, too. Everyone was crying. Clara had tears on her cheeks, too. For them, not for herself.
After a while, Micah pushed away from her. He sniffed and wiped his nose on the back of his hand. “You aren’t going to tell anyone I was crying, are you?”
“Nee, I wouldn’t dream of it.” She offered him a napkin from the picnic basket, and he used it to blow his nose. She leaned back to look at Amos and Lily. “Are you feeling better, too?”
They both nodded. She rose to her feet. “Let us dry our eyes and find Ethan. He is surely going to be starved by now.”
“I’m hungry,” Amos declared.
Micah cuffed him gently on the head. “You’re always hungry.”
Amos brushed his hair into place and grinned at his brother. “I know.”
Happy to see that their tears were done for the moment, Clara picked up the picnic hamper and settled it on her arm. She looked around. “I’m not sure where your onkel was going to be working.”
“It’s this way.” Micah took off toward a narrow ravine.
Clara caught up with him. “Are you sure?”
“Ja. See the hoofprints. Only Onkel Ethan’s horses have feet that big.”
She glanced down. He was right. The tracks were unmistakable. Walking single file along the creek that tumbled over a rocky streambed, she and the children soon heard the sound of Ethan’s chain saw. A few minutes later, they climbed into a small clearing. Ethan didn’t see them. He was intent on cutting through the tree. His horses stood off to the side of the path, waiting patiently for their chance to start working.
Clara judged she and the children were far enough away from the trees to be safe. “We will wait here until your onkel is finished.”
The words were barely out of her mouth before the tree came crashing down. Amos glanced at her with a huge grin on his face. “That was awesome.”
Lily looked up at Clara. “If we cut down all the trees, where will the birds sit?”
Clara grinned at her. “Good question.”
Ethan spotted them at that moment and waved. She waved back, suddenly eager to spend time with him again. Was he a man who cou
ld only love one woman or was his brother wrong? She had no way to answer the question. The only thing she could do was guard her heart against caring for him more than she already did.
He pulled his yellow ear protectors down around his neck. “I was beginning to wonder if you had forgotten me.”
She put a smile on her face. “I’m sorry we’re late.”
“I will forgive you if you brought me some of that cherry cobbler I like so well.”
She pulled a long face. “Cherry cobbler, I don’t know...”
Lily tugged on her skirt. “Yes, you do. It’s in the basket.”
Clara pretended to be disappointed. “That was our secret. Now we have to share it with him instead of keeping it all to ourselves.”
Lily shook her head. “You know we must share with those less fortunate.”
Clara met Ethan’s amused gaze and burst out laughing.
* * *
Ethan had seen a few tentative smiles from Clara, but he’d never heard her laugh. The sound of it made his grin widen. She needed to laugh more often. Sometimes she was much too serious.
He stepped forward and took the picnic basket from her. “Come, I have a table ready for us.”
“You do?” She looked as if she didn’t believe him.
He cocked his head toward the tree he had just finished cutting down. “The stump will make a pretty good table. I’ll have some chairs cut in a jiffy.”
He trimmed one of the logs he had cut earlier into sections and arranged them around the stump. Clara spread her quilt over the makeshift table. “I love the smell of fresh-cut wood.”
She opened the hamper and began to set out lunch. There was fried chicken, fresh-baked bread that was still warm, corn on the cob and her cobbler. She reached into the basket and pulled out two fresh apples. “I thought your horses might enjoy a treat, too.”
He was surprised by her thoughtfulness. “Danki. You may feed it to them yourself if you’d like.”
The Amish Nanny Page 11