An Old Man And His Axe: A Prepper fiction book of survival in an EMP grid down post apocalyptic world (Old Preppers Die Hard 1)

by Ron Foster

“I told you I thought you brought some booze with you!” Jeremy started complaining before Becky’s icy stare told him to hush.

  “I guess my boy told you I was crazy and not supposed to drink with my meds but he don’t understand everything, besides I been off my pills for weeks now and I actually feel better.” Becky said half reassuring Farley and her son that it wouldn’t be a problem for her to partake of some adult beverages.

  “That is the best thing I have heard of all day; I got various instant drink mixes we can use for a mixer.” Farley said, grinning like Cheshire cat.

  “Oh hell.” the boy grumbled but didn’t say anything further as both the adults gave him their ‘stay in your place’ boy looks.

  “I got some MRE pound cake out there in the van you all can have, we will make it a party!” Farley said to brighten things up.

  “Is it any good?” the boy asked.

  “Very good, matter of fact, if you don’t fuss about us having a few drinks and relaxing, I will introduce you to some military cheese spread and crackers you can have for a treat.” Farley said rising to go get some.

  “I am not saying another word, but I ain`t going to go to bed early, either.” Jeremy said before the humor of it all had everybody back in an enjoyable mood.

  “Let me get a couple of things to bring in the cabin. Jeremy, you want to help me?” Farley offered.

  “Yea sure, so what does MRE cheese spread taste like? Is it kind of like cheese whiz?” Jeremy questioned as he followed him out the door.

  “You could say that, I got some packets of peanut butter also but you’re limited to one because I want to use it for squirrel bait. You ever eat squirrel, Jeremy?” Farley asked as he unlocked his van and started rooting around as Jeremy held a flashlight for him.

  “Can’t say that I have, what’s it taste like?” Jeremy asked.

  “Tastes like food, notice I didn’t say chicken. I will catch us some tomorrow and teach you and your mom my famous fricassee recipe. Hey, your mom isn’t going to freak out if I carry this .22 rifle in there will she?” Farley asked.

  “No, she was raised around guns, won’t be a problem at all. Probably be glad to have it and you in the house. Are we going out looking around for gas in the morning?” Jeremy asked.

  “I guess so, any idea which way we should go looking? I don’t want to burn up a bunch of gas or leave your momma alone for very long.” Farley said before he started kicking himself for not thinking that Becky would probably have a very dim view about him taking her boy out to go steal gas.

  “I was thinking up by the marina would be a good place to go but she said no to that yesterday. I told her all them boats probably had a can of gas on them or some in the tank but she said she already tried there and nobody would sell.” Jeremy stated.

  “How far is this Marina?” Farley asked.

  “About 15 miles, Mom said the owner was walking around with a big stainless pistol on and in a bad mood.” Jeremy said warningly.

  “You hear or see many boats out on the lake?” Farley inquired grabbing his bug out bag but not knowing why he felt more comfortable having it close to him outside of extra ammunition.

  “First few weeks or so I heard several boats out and then it got pretty quiet, it’s rare to see one now but this is a big lake as you know.

  Farley knew how big the lake was, hell you could buy whole maps of the lake that encompassed the rivers and tributaries feeding its 750 mile shorelines. He had never been out on the lake itself proper in a boat and instead had enjoyed just what he could see from wherever it was that he had seen on the way to the vacation cabin he had once rented so he was at a loss as to whatever hidden coves or other resort settings it possessed.

  How many people would bug out to the lake in this SHTF situation they found themselves in now, he wondered? Probably anyone who had a cabin and a fishing pole he guessed. I mean as soon as it became apparent that the city is not where you wanted to be at this point and time, folks would start migrating in that direction, he figured. It might not be as easy to scrape by around here as he figured. People that had places on the lake were often times sportsman with lots of money and that meant a bunch of high priced deer rifles and chances of being picked off at a few hundred yards if he was up to no good.

  Farley you might need to do a total rethink on this situation, he considered. On the one hand his chances of survival were increased by having access to water and game, on the other hand having a bunch of close knit people with guns and particularly ones accustomed to carrying scoped deer rifles made him consider being even more cautious about venturing out on a foray somewhere. Time for a drink, time to think about bugging in where he was at…

  “What the hell?” Farley said as he heard the sound of a shotgun going off in the not too far distance. It was hard to tell exactly how far away the gun shot was this close to the lake but it was within walking distance of about a half mile or so.

  “You reckon that’s them pickup truck boys?” Jeremy asked in a low voice.

  “No, that shot was closer than where we saw them parked at. Come on, your mom is probably worried to death now. Act like it was nothing.” Farley said heading for the house.

  Becky met them at the door and searched Farley’s eyes for a clue as she asked him had he shot his pistol off at something. “Wasn’t me, darling, sounded like way further up the road. Probably someone out shining a deer.” Farley said trying to reassure her.

  “What’s ‘shining a deer’?” Becky asked looking off in the dark in back of him and her son.

  “That’s sometimes still hunting or riding country roads and shining a bright light on a deer to make them freeze so you can get a shot off at them. It’s illegal as hell and considered poaching but it’s effective. Somebody probably just got them some dinner is all, a gun going off at odd hours in the country is just one of those things you get used to. Could be they shot a coyote bothering their place or put an attitude adjustment on a snake too close to the house, nothing to worry about.” Farley said telling her to just take it in stride.

  “Ok, sorry for being so jumpy, you’re probably right. I am just a bundle of nerves these days; did you bring some mix for our drinks?” Becky asked trying to relax.

  “I got that and some good munchies. Brought my rifle in too, hope you don’t mind.” Farley said setting down his gear here and there.

  “No problem, if I had one I would be carrying it around. You don’t happen to have an extra one do you?” Becky said looking a bit afraid.

  “No, sorry, I got my little pistol and this little rifle. I used to have a bunch of guns, my grandfather told me to never sell guns or land off but he never experienced the economic hardships I have been through.” Farley said remorsefully.

  “You and me both, I used to have things but it seems fate has a way of separating you from them regardless how much you love them. Now, as for mixers what do you have?” Becky said brightly ending the pity party they were working on.

  “I have got a few flavors, but I suggest we mix a whole batch of one thing or another if we can get in agreement on flavor. Lemonade or fruit punch is my choice of poison but there is orange or grape if you prefer.” Farley said salivating over getting himself his first real alcoholic drink in a while.

  “Lemonade sounds fine to me if it does to you.” Becky said studying the various small brown imprinted Mylar packets he dropped on the table.

  “You want to do the honors or you want me to?” Farley asked.

  “You better do it, I have no idea how much a canteen cup holds.” Becky said studying the directions on a package.

  “Oh, that’s easy, it’s about two cups. Look here, this is a canteen cup.” Farley said removing his from his web gear strapped to his pack.

  “I take it you were in the Army, Farley?” Becky asked studying the cup he had removed out from under a one quart canteen.

  “Yea, many years ago, nobody in our services wears web gear like that anymore. I still like it, though. It distribute
s the weight and allows you to carry more. Cool, that will work.” Farley said as she handed him a 2 quart pitcher to mix the drinks in.

  “Going to be one of those nights...” The boy muttered.

  “I got some cocoa if you feel like firing up that stove again.” Farley advised him.

  “I don’t mind, that thing is easy to light.” The boy said jumping up at the opportunity to play with the thing and grabbing a sauce pan and heading out the door.

  “He doesn’t understand...” Becky began before Farley cut her off.

  “He understands more than he should, I guess but he is fast becoming a man. You need to start depending on him as such also, the world is pretty messed up now.” Farley said pouring water out of the kettle they set on the rocket stove to sterilize the water previously in after they got done cooking the fish in a frying pan.

  “I know, it’s time to grow up quick and I haven’t wanted him to do that quite yet.” Becky said remorsefully.

  “To us and to him.” Farley said after pouring a generous amount of the libation they were about to consume into a couple of glasses.

  “Farley, do you think they will get the power back on soon?” Becky asked taking a big swig out of her drink.

  “I am not going to mince words with you, darling, no it’s not going to happen anytime soon and those that still believe it might happen are going to be the first to go.” Farley said somberly looking out the screen door at the boy trying to light the stove with the Ferro rod he had recently gifted him with.

  “Hang on a minute. No, that’s wrong Jeremy; remember I told you that you need to be thinking about almost holding down the paper or whatever else you’re trying to catch on fire with that fire steel? You can’t get that thing going just shooting sparks down it or away from your tinder source on the outside.” Farley advised.

  “Oh yea, I forgot, I got it now, Farley. Thanks!” the boy said and commenced to start a fire on the driveway on a piece of cotton ball he could drop down into the stove to catch it.

  “Sorry about that, rookie mistakes, we all have done them. You were saying?” Farley said taking a sip from his drink and relishing the taste.

  “I was asking you when you thought the power would come back on and you told me you didn’t expect it any time soon, if not soon, when Farley?” Becky asked, studying him and waiting on his response.

  “Maybe never, darling, now don’t cry. I can’t really answer your question because there are too many variables. Some parts of the U.S. will have pockets of power but for the vast majority it might be years.” Farley said reaching across the table to try to hold her hand and comfort her.

  “You’re lying, why do men always lie to me!” Becky wailed and snatched her hand back.

  Farley looked up and saw Jeremy poking his head in the door with that sheath knife of his out and waved at him that everything was alright and felt a sigh of relief as Becky confirmed that to her son and he backed out but was still looking in, watching carefully.

  “I didn’t mean to upset you, Becky, I was just being as honest as I could be. I might be wrong about things, but that is my best judgment. The reason I was so blunt was that I didn’t want to sugar coat anything and tell you that you needed to be thinking about being on your own. Folks can’t help each other out much anymore no matter how necessary it is or if they want to or not. Most folks already believe it’s every man or woman for themselves.” Farley said stoically no longer feeling he was welcome here and wishing he had just gone on to bed.

  “You’re wrong, you got to be wrong! The power always comes back on!” Becky said in her meltdown moment.

  “Oh shit Farley you forgot this woman was medicated on a good day, too late now you are going to have to deal with it.”

  “This drink tastes good, how is yours?” Farley said trying to diffuse the situation and wondering if that boy out there had any inherited mental instability from his mother that might require him to be thinking about murdering him in his sleep.

  “You’re a grey haired, scarrred up, toothless old man. What do you know? Jeremy you come in here and tell your friend good night!” Becky called out and Farley picked up his drink to leave this nut house he now found himself in.

  Farley was half way to the door and starting to pick his stuff up when Jeremy came in and started telling his mom that Farley was all right and she was wrong for being so mean to him.

  “It’s all right buddy, I will stay in the van tonight and leave out in the morning...” Farley began before Becky started telling him to sit back down or get the hell off the property; she didn’t care which but wanted him to stay.

  “That woman is crazy!” Is all Farley could think of as the conflicting stay here and leave messages came to him from Becky and her son.

  “I am sorry, Farley, I shouldn’t have shouted at you. You can stay, I didn’t mean for you to leave, I just didn’t want you telling me that there were no chances any more. I will be good, I promise!” Becky said looking at him imploringly.

  “Do I stay or go?” Farley thought to himself watching the crazy banshee change personalities.

  “She will be all right in a minute, Farley. Stick around and let me talk to her.” Jeremy said going to comfort his mother.

  “Damn. I am in a nut house, how in the world did I set that woman off, anyway? One minute she loves my insides and next she wouldn’t mind seeing me gutted like a steer.” Farley thought wondering what exactly the problem was. He didn’t understand women enough he already knew that. How you could get fussed about for one thing when it was another thing bothering them but this woman was an enigma all to her own.

  “Farley, it will be ok, you ain`t got to worry about a thing. Just go for a walk and come back for some more drinks; she will calm down in a minute. Her psychiatrist says she is non-violent.” Jeremy offered.

  “Damn, I needed to hear that like I need a hole in my head.” Farley considered as he dragged his bug out bag, rifle and extra chow out the door. He might have had some lonely feelings beforehand but they were gone now.

  Farley loaded his van and set the 5 gallon jerry can of gas out begrudgingly for them to find in the morning and fired up the van and started to back out the yard before Jeremy came running out to beg him to stay.

  “She’s all right now, she’s crying about what she done, come on back inside, she has a handle on herself now and really wants you to come back in.” Jeremy advised.

  “Holy crap, boy, kind of hard for me to trust her now. I didn’t do shit except tell her I didn’t think the power would come back on anytime soon and tried to hold her hand to make her feel better. What kind of stupid do you think I am to get back around her now?” Farley said in a huff.

  “Weird as it sounds, she will be fine by the second or third drink if you can tolerate her. She will cut herself off soon after that and go to bed. She really does feel bad about going off on you like she did and promises to be good.” Jeremy said teary eyed.

  “I am either the biggest fool or the biggest softie in the world, I will do what you ask, Jeremy, but the first time she starts hollering at me again, I am out of here, o.k.?” Farley said shutting the van down while arguing with himself over which was worse, going off in the dark in to the great unknown or dealing with that harridan that was sugar and spice one moment and a bitch from hell the next.

  “Thank you, Farley, I know it’s hard to understand her but I know her. It will be o,k. She is just having a hard time adapting.” Jeremy said.

  “That room I am going to, maybe be borrowing, have a lock on it?” Farley asked.

  .

  “Yea, it’s got one but you’re bunking with me.” Jeremy said letting that axe of a statement fall on his head.

  “Oh hell no, that isn’t going to work, young son. I don’t know you or her and I can’t see myself hemmed in that way. I tell you what, I will come back in for a bit but I am sleeping in the van, o.k.?” Farley said trying to wrap his head around the situation.

  “That’ll be ok, you
can park in the driveway next door if you feel like you need to or you can even park in the one next to it. Ain’t nobody there, those folks left weeks ago but she won’t let me break in to see if they left anything edible around yet.” The boy said trying his best to keep Farley from leaving.

  About that time, Becky came running out imploring Farley to stay and have another drink with her and for whatever reason Farley decided he would for this evening share a bit of this nightmare with them further. Surprisingly, Becky and Farley drank late into the night without any further outbursts or interruptions but he moved himself and his van a couple of spots over before he was willing to put his head down for the night.

  “Crazy is as crazy does, Farley told himself in his inebriated mind before talking himself out of finding himself a place in the woods he figured they couldn’t locate him at this evening. Farley woke at about 5:30 a.m. as the new days’ sun began cresting the lake and wondered what in the hell he thought he was doing. Yea, it was fun kicking it with the boy and his mom and he had laughed more than he had in a long time sharing their company last night but this morning he was sober and back to thinking about his own personal survival.