From this moment, he would be responsible for Evan and Madeline. He would be the one teaching them. He would be their sole source and provider of every single little thing, both physical and emotional.
Lord, he’d have to teach them table manners, how to eat properly, how to speak well, how to dress, how to...
Enough. He was getting ahead of himself. First he had to get through today.
When he stood, Honey did the oddest thing. She unbuttoned his shirt and re-buttoned it, the action intimate and wifely. He stifled a gasp because the woman was offering temptation on a platter. He should move away. He couldn’t.
She didn’t touch his skin, but when she finished and patted his shirt as though he were a child, there was nothing childish about his response.
Like wrestling a steer, he wrangled his unruly desires under control, just barely, mindful of how much he had to keep his distance from Honey, and yet...he needed her for the children.
“That’s been bothering me since you walked into the bar. Now it’s buttoned properly,” she murmured, seemingly unaware of her effect on him. “When did you last sleep?”
He released the breath he’d been holding. “Don’t remember.”
“You need as much taking care of as the children.”
He hadn’t wanted to admit it to himself, but yeah, he did. He’d been independent, on his own, since he’d turned twenty-one.
He was a strong man. Most people who knew him would say he had backbone and solid ethics, but taking on responsibility for two tiny humans scared the shit out of him.
His turmoil must have shown. Honey ordered, “Calm down.”
How? With Sandy gone, his family was gone. The only family that mattered, that is. He didn’t count the woman who’d given birth to the two of them and the man who’d fathered them, both of whom had shown up at the funeral and been angry when the will had been read and they’d been denied the right to take the children home with them.
As if reading his thoughts, Honey asked, “Are there no other relatives who can help to raise them?”
“Dennis grew up in foster care and had no family left that he knew of. Mine—Sandy’s—well... Sandy and Dennis willed the children’s care to me.” And that was the end of that.
Maybe trying to lighten the heavy atmosphere, Honey said, “At least we don’t have to worry about diapers.”
Cole hadn’t thought of that. He shuddered. Thank God, they weren’t babies.
But he’d heard that we again. He tried to smile back. “There is that in our favor.”
He opened the suitcase he’d brought from Sandy’s home, but there was nothing in it he would need overnight. The children had their pajamas and toothbrushes in their backpacks, so they were ready to sleep anywhere. They didn’t seem to want to part with them.
Maybe the bags offered security or something. Along with the normal everyday items, they also held some of their favorite small toys.
From the bedroom, he got himself a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt to sleep in. He snagged his toiletries bag.
Ready to head back to her place, he found Honey in the living room staring outside. He might not want to let himself get close to her, but she was a good person, doing so much for them.
He said, “You’re kindhearted, Honey.”
She turned around and blinked. He understood why. He never said nice things to her. He didn’t speak to her much. He couldn’t, not when his default action before today had been to become tongue-tied the second she was in his vicinity.
He was a smart guy, but he became a fool where Honey Armstrong was concerned.
Not at the moment, though. Not completely. Not when he needed her help so badly.
“Should I bring my sleeping bag?”
“No. I have plenty of blankets.”
They trudged down the stairs, back across the street and upstairs to Honey’s apartment.
Rachel waited for them. “We have to leave now to be home in time for dinner with Travis.”
Rachel and Honey hugged. Honey held Beth while Rachel put on a sweater and wrapped her arms around Cole. “Take care of yourself, okay?”
Cole nodded against the top of her head.
He’d never known such good people, had such great friends, before coming to Rodeo, Montana.
“’Bye, Sheriff Cole,” Tori piped up. He patted her head.
“Goodbye, Evan and Madeline,” Rachel said. “When you get more settled in, come to our house for a visit, okay?”
Evan nodded hard. “Yeah!”
Madeline stared.
They left with Honey following to lock the front door, taking every semblance of normality with them.
Cole stared at his two young charges. Terror opened huge cracks in his normally rock-solid self-confidence as he stood alone with them in this room.
He was lost.
Chapter Five
Honey returned upstairs to find Cole still hovering just inside the door.
Honey’s apartment was spacious. Cole made it feel small.
The thought of him sleeping in her apartment made her nerves skitter. Weird. She believed without a doubt that Cole would never in a kajillion years make an advance.
So why are you nervous, Honey?
Because all of these years while Honey had been thinking of him as just the town sheriff, she’d ignored how truly beautiful the man was. She’d made herself ignore it, because she didn’t want to find him attractive.
He worked in one of the most dangerous careers on the planet—law enforcement.
Daniel’s death as a young deputy killed on the job had taught her that powerful lesson. Never again would she be involved with a lawman. There was too much pain at the end of that road.
Don’t think about it, Honey. Move on.
Here in her apartment, Cole was too big and too male—and made her edgy just standing in her space.
She went to the kitchen to prepare dinner, to do anything to stay away from Cole.
She’d made that mistake of re-buttoning his shirt, of standing too close to his heat, and it had felt wonderful.
So, the solution was to keep her distance and be as normal as possible.
She put together their dinner—leftover roast beef and scalloped potatoes.
“Seems all we’ve been doing is eating since we got here,” Cole said.
“The roast is incredibly tender.” Honey cut Madeline’s into tiny bites.
“Yeah.” Cole moved the food around on his plate.
“Thank goodness for Vy and her diner food,” Honey said, trying to lighten the heaviness in the room, to keep the silence that threatened to overwhelm them all at bay.
“Uh-huh.” Cole seemed to have settled into monosyllables again.
After dinner, Honey made up her long, comfy L-shaped sofa with a pillow and a couple of quilts for Cole.
Honey was all about hominess and comfort. When she wasn’t dealing with the busyness of owning a business and corralling rowdy cowboys ready to have fun on the weekend, she liked to nest.
She started to pull apart the child cave to straighten up for the night, but Evan protested.
“I like it,” he said. More importantly, he added, “Madeline likes it, too.” In other words, big brother was taking care of his little sister.
Honey left it intact.
Together, but also apart, Honey and Cole got the children ready for bed.
Honey bathed Madeline and dressed her in a small flannel nightshirt.
Cole gave Evan a bath. The child emerged with damp hair, wearing a pair of Star Wars pajamas.
Both subdued children brushed their teeth.
There was no hint there would be fireworks until they tried to put Evan into bed in the spare room.
“I want to sleep with Cole.” With a mulish jut of his sharp lit
tle jaw, he crossed his arms and refused to stay on the bed.
“There’s a perfectly good bed right here for you and your sister,” Cole said.
“No!”
Evan unleashed a torrent of noes and twists and turns to evade Cole’s efforts to keep him in the bed.
Cole sighed. “Evan, there’s no need for you to sleep on the sofa.”
“Would it be so bad, Cole?” Honey asked. “Just for tonight?”
“It’s not just tonight. It’s been every night.”
Honey understood immediately. He was exhausted. He needed a good night’s sleep on his own.
“Get in the bed,” Cole said, not unkindly.
Evan backed himself into the corner of the room. “No, no, no!” he shouted. He sat down and kicked his feet on the floor in a full-blown tantrum.
Honey stared at Cole. “Has he been like this since the funeral?”
“No. He’s been quiet. We were still in his parents’ house.”
“When did you leave there?”
“This morning.”
“So tonight he’s in a strange apartment in a different town, even a different state, and being asked to sleep in a bed that’s not his. And all he wants is his parents, no doubt.”
Cole picked up Evan and put him on the bed, but he’d wrapped his arms around Cole and wouldn’t let go.
He cried and screamed, even though Cole lay down beside him, setting off Madeline.
Honey picked her up and carried her into her own bedroom, closing the door to block out Evan’s screams as much as she could.
It wasn’t her business to tell Cole how to parent these children. Evan needed to be with Cole. Cole needed sleep.
The man was stuck between a rock and a hard place.
Honey figured her role right now was to take care of Madeline for a few minutes, to give Cole room to work things out with Evan.
She stepped out of her slippers and climbed into bed, awkwardly, because Madeline wouldn’t ease her grip.
Oh, these vulnerable, hurting children. So much pain.
Honey arranged the pillows across the headboard and sat up against them with Madeline in her arms across her lap. She snugged the white eyelet lace comforter up around the child and started to hum to try to drown out Evan.
Madeline cried.
Honey poured all of her soothing grace and care into her hold on the child, pressing her close.
She hummed and hummed.
Madeline’s sobs quieted in time and became hiccups. Gradually, she fell asleep.
Honey held her tightly, afraid that she would wake again. Madeline needed sleep.
In time, the noise from the other room stopped.
A short while later, her door opened quietly on its well-oiled hinges. Cole peeked in.
“Is he asleep?” Honey whispered.
“Yeah. Finally. Madeline?”
She nodded.
He stepped into the room. “I’ll take her to her bed.”
Gingerly, he took Madeline from Honey without waking her.
She said quietly, “I left you a bath towel and a washcloth in the bathroom. Why don’t you get washed up after you put Madeline to bed?”
He nodded and left. Honey heard him enter the spare bedroom, and then a minute later, the faucet turned on in the bathroom. Madeline must have stayed asleep when he put her in the spare bed with Evan.
Ten minutes later, Honey cleaned up for the night. The living room was dark, as was the spare bedroom.
She went to her room and left her door ajar. She needed to hear the children when they awoke in the morning so she could make breakfast.
Cole must have been exhausted. Even from here, Honey could hear the faint rumbles of his snores.
She said goodnight to Daniel’s photograph, as she did every night, patted it and pulled up her covers.
Lying in bed, staring through the crack in the curtains to the ambient light of the town reflecting from the sky, she tried to remember the last time she’d had a man sleeping in her apartment.
She fell asleep still trying to remember.
Honey awoke in the middle of the night to silence.
She checked the time. Two a.m.
So why had she awakened?
A small sound drifted down the hallway—a child sobbing, followed by a deep voice consoling.
Honey threw off her covers and tiptoed to the living room.
Rumpled, Cole sat with Madeline curled against his chest crying, the floor lamp beside him casting yellow light over them. Evan snuggled under one of his arms, hiccuping.
Cole looked tired still. Four hours wasn’t enough to overcome his past week.
Honey approached. “What can I do?”
After a quick glance at her bare legs—nuts, she’d forgotten to put on a robe to cover her oversize T-shirt—he said, “I don’t know. They don’t like to be alone in the dark.”
While Cole might ooze masculine vitality in his everyday life, at this moment darkness banded his eyes and shadowed their depths.
“Too quiet.” Evan hiccuped some more.
Honey’s stereo system sat in the far corner. She turned it on and found an easy listening station, adjusting the volume down to barely audible, nothing more than white noise in the background.
From the guest room she retrieved their pillows. Cole needed sleep in whatever way possible.
Stopping in the kitchen, she turned on the light over the stove.
Back in the living room, she said, “Evan, come to this end of the sofa. You can sleep here. Okay?”
Evan nodded, and Honey set up a cozy nest of a pillow and a couple of afghans on the short end of the L. He crawled over, and she tucked him in.
“Here,” she said, handing Cole a pillow. “Lie down with her on your chest. When she falls asleep, you can move her over beside you with her own pillow.”
“Good thinking.” Cole untangled the blankets that were half underneath them.
When he settled onto his back, Madeline curled on top of his warm, T-shirt-covered chest, closed her eyes and put her thumb into her mouth.
Honey tucked the blankets around both of them.
Before she could leave, Cole grasped her arm, his long fingers wrapping around her wrist.
The warmth of it shot through her.
“Thanks,” he said. That was all.
So like Cole to be brief. His eyes said far more. Honey just didn’t know how to interpret the message there.
Unsettled by his intensity, she nodded, turned off the floor lamp to leave only the muted light from the kitchen, and returned to her bedroom. Curled in her own bed, she touched her wrist where she could swear she still felt Cole’s heat on her skin.
* * *
HONEY AWOKE AT seven the following morning. She walked down the hallway toward the bathroom, yawning widely and wondering whether Cole had gotten much sleep last night.
The closed bathroom door opened just as she got there, revealing Cole stepping out and hauling his T-shirt over his head.
But first—oh, first—she got an eyeful of gorgeous male flesh, an entire broad chest of it. The shoulders and biceps that looked so big in clothing looked even bigger, and better, naked.
His jeans hung low on his hips. There was not one ounce of flab on the man.
The scent of shampoo and soap drifted on a wave of humidity from the small room. He’d already showered. She hadn’t heard a thing.
Damp hair stuck to his scalp.
In a perfect world, she would curl against him as she wanted to and wrap her arms around his warm tempting body.
Mentally, she took a sharp step away from those sultry images. She couldn’t think about Cole that way.
Mouth dry, she said, “You should have slept in.”
“Couldn’t.”
> Her brows rose. “Too bad.”
He finished pulling his shirt to his waist, hiding the tempting breadth of him. Honey hoped he hadn’t noticed her interest. There was nowhere for it to go.
It had been a long time since she’d had sex. Honey liked men. She liked their bodies.
Nothing would happen with Cole, though, because she refused to let anything come of her attraction to a man in law enforcement.
But that chest. That wonderful, manly perfection.
Why couldn’t they have found a way for him to sleep at his own place so she wouldn’t wander down her hallway this morning to the shock of Cole Payette’s beauty?
Virile—it seemed like an old-fashioned word these days, but it fit Cole. He was pure temptation.
Put on your crisp sheriff’s uniform. Become the controlled officer. Remind me why you are off-limits.
Don’t be a man who tempts me in my own apartment.
Funny that she’d never noticed before how narrow the hallway was, or how little air made its way down here.
Cole’s sharp blue gaze watched her, but he said not a word. Typical Cole, Honey thought, but without heat. As much as his silences sometimes bothered her, there was something nice about standing here with him in early morning quiet, as though the rest of the world didn’t exist.
He reached up to switch off the bathroom light and dimness enveloped them, making the world even smaller.
Cole turned to head down the hallway back to the quiet living room.
Shaken by her newly awakened and unwelcome awareness of Cole, Honey entered the washroom and closed the door.
She leaned against it and breathed heavily.
Sure, she’d always been aware of how attractive Cole was. How could she not? She had a pair of perfectly good eyes.
But his current proximity rattled her.
Oh, for God’s sake, Honey. He’s only been in your apartment one night. Pull yourself together.
After that impatient pep talk, she showered and got herself ready for the day. Before leaving her bedroom, she glanced at Daniel’s photograph.
Remember Daniel, Honey. Remember the pain of losing him and resist the handsome sheriff.
By the time she entered the living room, she had her unruly libido under control. Both children were awake and sitting up on the sofa.
Rodeo Sheriff Page 6