by Naomi West
“Both. I need full-time, someone flexible enough to take most of the day, but part of the evening when I need it. Some overnights.”
Sandra blew out a whistle. “Good luck finding that. What you need is a wife, not a babysitter.”
“But you’re all taken,” he said.
“Honey, you want to be hooked up?” Jessica asked. “I know a real nice girl.”
“Who?” Sandra asked. “Not that skank Melanie.”
“God, no. Her name is Samantha and she’s real cute. Works over at the courthouse. Real convenient for someone like you, when you need something.”
“Thanks, but I really just need someone to watch Damian. Starting immediately,” Hawk said. “No time for romance.” Besides, he needed to figure out this whole Alexa thing anyway. If his feelings for her turned into something he wanted a clear conscience.
“Sorry,” Jessica said. “You know that we’re either home or here all day. And when Blade decides it’s time to go, we go.”
“Same here,” Sandra said, bouncing her youngest baby on her knee. “If you drop him off here, I’m sure one of us could keep an eye on him.”
That worked on occasion in a pinch, but not as a long term solution. He needed someone reliable and steady, not just whoever happened to be around, if anyone was around. And in the middle of the night, the place was usually empty, aside from the occasional King.
Hawk looked to the other ladies, who each gave him a regretful look as they told him they didn’t know anyone.
“Try that Craigslist online,” Sandra said. “I know people find stuff on there all the time.”
“Yeah, maybe. Thanks, ladies.” Hawk walked back into the main room.
He played a round of cards until his phone rang. He pulled it out, thinking at first it might be Alexa needing him but it was Jared.
“You working, man?” Jared asked. “I got a job I need your expertise on.”
“When?”
“Now. I’m at this job that’s packed in tight. I can’t move the other cars, but I thought maybe together we could figure something out.”
In other words, Jared wanted him to break into one of the other cars to move it out of the way so he could get whatever car he was trying to pick up. Sometimes people thought they were slick and parked their soon-to-be-repo-ed cars in a tight place to limit tow truck access. Sometimes Hawk was able to drive them out, but a few times he and Jared had come up with alternative methods. Most times he could get into a car, move it, let Jared take out his job, and then put the first car back and relock it without anyone ever knowing he’d touched it.
Hawk looked at his phone. It was getting into the evening. Past the time that Alexa probably planned to stay. “Let me make one call. I’ll text you.”
He dialed Alexa’s number. “Hey, I just got a call for a job. Can you stay another hour or so?”
“Sure, that’s fine.”
“Thanks.” He hung up and texted Jared to send him the address.
Chapter 9
Alexa hung up and looked at Damian with a smile. “Daddy’s going to be late,” she murmured. She pulled her eyebrows together. Did Hawk consider himself a father to Damian or was he simply ‘Uncle Hawk? She wondered if Damian was even old enough yet to know the distinction.
She had done a little searching through the kitchen while he took his nap, but without knowing how long Hawk was going to be gone, she’d hadn’t gone too deep. Now that she knew for sure she’d have at least an hour, she stuck Damian on her hip and headed to the office.
When she walked through the hall, she thought about their weird moment earlier. Had they really almost kissed? It made her heart race all over again just thinking about it. She’d wanted to kiss him. She’d wanted him to kiss her. None of it made any sense to her. Was he feeling the same tension she was? Did he want her, too? Regardless, her emotions were running contrary to common sense, and she patted her cheeks.
She was here for a reason. She recalled her conversation with her sister the night before and her stern warning not to get feelings for Hawk. It’d been too late then, and now, after that moment, she didn’t know if she could stay as disconnected as she needed to be. The thought haunted her.
Hawk was a proven criminal even if he had had zero part in Hugh’s death. He’d stolen cars and other things, gotten into fights, and been in possession of illegal weapons. When she’d mentioned weapons to him earlier, it’d been something of a test. Hawk was still on probation. He wasn’t allowed near guns and could only handle knives that were used for cooking. If she found something like that in his house he could go back to jail. She hadn’t found anything he shouldn’t have. Yet, she reminder herself.
Damian gurgled happily and wiggled on her hip as she looked through papers in the office. She bounced him around a little, but she didn’t want to put him down in case he got into something he shouldn’t. It would be difficult to explain why an important paper had been chewed on without fessing up that she’d been in the office where she had no reason to be. Her close call with him earlier was enough to put him on alert and she didn’t want him being suspicious of her.
She thought her cover was pretty decent. He had barged into the house making a lot of noise, and hadn’t called out to her until he was already inside. She had jumped and panicked, so that part wasn’t even a lie. But obviously, she hadn’t been in there hiding from a threat, she been searching for one. And she had her own gun for protection if someone broke in. She might have put Damian somewhere safe, but she would never hide from an intruder like that. That was something people without weapons and training did, not something a former cop did.
Damian started to close his eyes longer and longer with each blink. This was perfect timing. She hurried off to lay him in his crib and after making sure he was falling back asleep, she returned to the office. She would still have a solid half hour to go through things before Hawk came home. And from where the office was located in front of the house, she’d hear his bike and see him before he came inside.
She went through all of the papers in his desk, looking for signs of faked books or anything that might point to illegal activity in his business. She looked for anything related to Hugh or Damian or the murder. By the time she’d gone through it all, she had to conclude that either his business really was legitimate, or he was hiding something somewhere else. She glanced at his computer. Tomorrow she’d go through the files he had there.
Still, he appeared to be holding up his end of the deal when it came to probation and his plea bargain. The one major charge that she tried her best to ignore was the reason he was on probation now after so many years. He’d been charged with manslaughter and served a few years. Not long enough for most manslaughter sentences, and then he’d gotten a plea deal.
She needed to get information, and she had a friend in the force pulling records for her, but all she knew was that the death he’d been charged with had been labeled accidental. But the fact that it was his own father made her suspicious. He had plenty of motive to kill him. What new evidence could have come up, or what else could have changed in order to get him out of jail and onto probation for something like that?
There was more to the story, for sure. When she got the official records, and with some internet searching, she should be able to get more information. And when the time was right, she could ask Hawk about it and see what he said. It seemed a little too convenient, though, that he’d gotten out like that. Made her think that he knew someone or that he’d been part of something bigger.
Chapter 10
After several days of coming home to Alexa, Hawk was starting to get used to her being around. She was becoming part of the routine, part of his everyday life. He’d been able to rely on her whenever something came up, and she’d been there for him. If he had to work late, she stayed. She even spent the night so he could do a few harder jobs. That was a huge plus. And if he was being honest, he wasn’t trying too hard to find a new babysitter anymore. He wanted her to be the
one to watch Damian. He wanted her to be there in his house when he got home after a hard day of work.
Damian seemed to also be growing attached to her. Of course, he was just a baby and was happy to be with anyone who fed him and gave him clean diapers. It was important that he was happy with her. He liked seeing Damian reach for her when she came in the door and that he was happy and content when he came home at night. Though Damian seemed fine going to Natalie’s when he used to go there every day, he never seemed so excited to see her as he did Alexa. Why in the world would Damian want to give that up to have some other babysitter caring for him?
Damian wasn’t the only one who got excited over seeing Alexa, though. No matter how he tried to push the feelings down, there was a little flutter in Hawk’s heart when she rang the bell or he came home and saw her. The more time he spent with her, the more time he wanted to be in her company. He didn’t need a relationship right now in his life. It would only complicate things, especially if she was watching Damian. What if something happened between them and she decided she couldn’t watch him anymore? Then he’d be right back where he was with no sitter. And right now, the whole babysitter arrangement was perfect.
Yet, he couldn’t deny that she made him laugh. So many times, she’d sing a goofy song to Damian and make faces and have him cracking up. She was smart, too. She always noticed little things, like when he moved the dish he kept his keys in or the one time he swiped out the microwave. She was highly observant like that. She knew if he had a bad day when he walked in the door, or if Damian hadn’t slept well the night before. She hadn’t even been around them very long, yet she could read them easily. More times than he could count he’d come home after a hard day and within minutes she’d made him feel better.
Not only were his feelings building, but so was the sexual tension. After that first time in the hallway when they’d nearly kissed, there had been a few more encounters like that. One time she handed Damian to him and leaned in as she did. He almost kissed her then. Another time he’d reached over and put his face much too close to hers. Every time, he’d turned as soon as he realized what was happening. But it seemed to take longer and longer each time.
He tried not to look at her body too long. If he wasn’t aching to kiss her, he was surely aching to do more. His dick would harden at the sight of her tight jeans or fitted top. He wanted to reach out and grab her. At night, he dreamt about the things he would do to her if he had the chance. He wasn’t sure how much more of this he could take. One of these days he was going to kiss her and not be able to stop. And there would be no going back after that.
He’d tried to think it all through. What would happen if they hooked up? Could they just go on like that? Put Damian to bed, then go hook up? She would probably want some sort of relationship, and he’d never been good at that. He needed to let her know, if something did happen, that it couldn’t go too far. He couldn’t be expected to be her boyfriend. To do things like go out on dates or meet her family just wasn’t his style.
Once again, he kicked himself for not just screwing Natalie. She’d promised no strings, and now here he was, facing a situation that could have many more strings. He could have made life easy on himself. Bang Natalie whenever he or she felt like it, keep his babysitter who’d been just fine, and not worry about any sort of expectations. Instead, he’d turned her down, fired her as a sitter, and now found himself attracted to a woman who might want far more than he was willing or able to give.
When her background check had come back from his buddy in the Kings, everything had been clear. She had no record of any sort but that didn’t mean she wasn’t hiding something. He walked in the door and heard her singing to Damian. Some lullaby he didn’t really know, but it sounded sweet. She looked up when he walked into the living room.
“Welcome home,” she said and smiled.
Damian held up his hands and let out a happy squeal.
“That’s right,” she said, “Uncle Hawk is home.”
Hawk took the baby from her and cradled him against his chest. “Hey, little man,” he said, and put his finger on Damian’s nose. The baby wiggled away and hiccupped.
Alexa stood and stretched. “Good day?”
“Wasn’t too bad. Got all the cars I wanted to get.”
“That’s good. And I got all the dirty diapers I wanted.”
Hawk chuckled. “I bet.”
“He’s a healthy baby, that’s for sure. Always so content and happy.”
“I’m sure that has a lot to do with you. You take good care of him.”
“So do you.”
“I was thinking,” he said. “Maybe tonight I could cook you dinner as kind of a thank you for all you’ve done. I can grill a pretty mean steak.”
“Is that so?” She tilted her head back and eyed him. “I think I might have to test you on that.”
“Anytime.” He smiled and handed Damian back to her. “If you wouldn’t mind.”
“Of course not.”
Alexa played with Damian for a while as he got things started. He’d already had the steaks in the refrigerator thawing for tonight. He had some fresh asparagus, too.
He went outside to the grill and started it up. The whole process of cleaning off the metal bars with the wire brush, feeling the grit come away under his pressure, then lighting the coals and watching them dance with flame for a while before turning red and glowing seemed to soothe him. Setting the steaks down and hearing that sizzle and pop as the fat hit the hot coals under. He’d grill steaks every night if the good ones weren’t so expensive.
As he started the asparagus in his vegetable griller, he watched Alexa with Damian through the window. He could watch her for hours playing with him and singing to him and rocking him. The baby just laughed and laughed when he was with her. She was something else. How was it she didn’t have kids of her own? Or a boyfriend or husband? These were things he wanted to find out tonight.
Most nights, she didn’t stay very long, and they didn’t get to talk much. This had been his plan when he knew he needed to find some things out: have a nice dinner, maybe bring out the wine to get her talking, and find out what her deal was. He still wondered if she was playing him somehow, but his feelings for her made him less suspicious all the time. That alone could be dangerous. Get in close, get the feelings going, then boom, hit you with whatever it is they were after. He’d seen it done to too many guys and something like that had happened to his brother.
When the asparagus was nearly done, he put the steaks on, watching carefully for the perfect moment to flip them. He took the food back inside where Alexa was setting the table with one hand while she held Damian on her other hip.
“That smells amazing,” she said.
“Just wait until you taste it.” He winked and dished the food out on the plates.
Alexa put Damian in his high chair and took a jar of baby food from the cabinet. “He should be good on formula for the day.” She put on his bib and fed him a spoonful before cutting into her own meat. “Wow, this looks perfect.”
He watched as she took her first bite, closing her eyes in enjoyment. “Like it?”
“Oh yes.”
“So, I passed the test?”
“Most definitely. Though, you might regret it.”
“How’s that?” He raised an eyebrow.
“If I know you can cook like this, I might want you to cook for me all the time.”
“I’d be happy to.”
Damian made a gurgle and slapped his palms on the tray of the high chair. Alexa fed him another few bites of his food before going back to hers. Hawk slid closer to the high chair and took over feeding him so she could eat.
“So, tell me,” he said. “You’re beautiful, smart, funny, caring, and clearly good with kids. How exactly do you not have a boyfriend? Or are you dating someone?”
“I’m not.” She set down her fork and took a sip of her wine. “I don’t know. I guess I just didn’t find the right one? I’ve had s
ome boyfriends in the past. Nothing major. But what about you? I could ask the same thing. Good job, good looking, sacrificing your bachelorhood to take on your nephew. Women go nuts for that sort of thing.”
He turned back to her. “I don’t usually do relationships.”
“Why is that?”
“They’re complicated. And people always get hurt.”
“Not always,” she said. “What about the couples who end up getting married?”
“They still get hurt. It just takes longer and ends up being much more expensive.”
“So, you’re completely against marriage?”
“Not completely. It’s fine for other people.”
She laughed. “Right. Just not for you.”
“Do you blame me? Are your parents still together?”