by Ezra Dawn
I pick up the envelope and have to bite back a growl. Clay fucking Poshmire. Just when I think I’m over the bastard he comes back with a vengeance. Why now? After all this time.
“I’ve got nothing to say to that man.”
“He’s dead. So, you can’t…say anything, that is.”
“And surprisingly, I feel nothing.” Except maybe relief or smug satisfaction but he doesn’t need to know that. “When did it happen?”
“Just over a year ago. His will stated that I was to find you and give you that letter.”
I stare at the letter for a moment then using my demon magic, I set it on fire and drop it in one of the empty peanut bowls. I’ll clean the mess up later.
The man whose name I haven’t gotten yet stares at the burning envelope in shock. “Why did you do that?”
“Because I have no need for it. He had his chance thirty years ago when he rejected me. I do not wish to read about how sorry he is or how I should understand the pressure he was under. I was his fated mate and he chose a woman over me. If he wasn’t dead and I saw him again I’d kill him myself. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have customers to tend to.”
I stand and turn to leave but he grabs my arm. “Wait, what about us? You might’ve been my Dad’s fated mate, but it seems you’re mine now.”
Fuck, I was hoping the reason for my wolf half’s prancing since I sat down was caused by something else. Since Demons know by direct eye contact, I’ve been protected with my sunglasses.
I lean forward, and lower my aviators. Shit, fuck, damn. He’s right. He is mine. I can’t do this again. I take a deep breath, so I’ll at least have his scent; jasmine and sage, fantastic combination; then, I look him in the eye and say, “I doubt anything in your pack has changed in the last thirty years. I bet they’ve picked out a nice girl for you to bond with.”
Steeling myself with a resolve I don’t really feel, I use compulsion magic with my next words. “Go home, you’ve done what you sought to do. You don’t want to be with someone like me.”
He leaves some cash on the bar and I watch as he walks out the door.
Back behind the bar, my wolf half makes his presence known once more.
Why’d you do that?
It’s for our own good.
Liar. Tell me the real reason.
I don’t want us to get hurt again.
I see, but isn’t sending him away hurting us?
No, because I compelled him to leave.
I get it. You want to test him.
Exactly, if he comes back after the compulsion wears off then I’ll give him a chance. If he doesn’t then it wasn’t meant to be.
I do love your logic snookums.
Don’t call me snookums.
You secretly love it.
Suuurreee.
Come on, you know you do. Admit it.
Fine.
Yay!
Gods, I shouldn’t have admitted that. My wolf side is going to be prancing in my head for an entire week because of that. Oh well, I’ve got work to do. It’ll keep me occupied while I wait to see if my mate is going to return to me. If I’m secretly hoping that he will, then no one needs to know about it but me.
By the time I realized what I was doing I was already on the road headed home. My emotions are all over the place now that my head is clear, and I am aware of what happened. My phone begins to ring, and I answer it. “Hello?”
“Hi sweetie. Did you find him?”
“Yes, I did.”
“And? You gave him the letter?”
“Yes.”
“Well? Did he read it?”
“No, he burned it.”
“What?! Why?!”
“He said he had no need for it. He didn’t want to read Dad’s apologies and excuses.”
She sighs and says, “It wasn’t all apologies and excuses. There were bank account forms as well.”
“What do you mean?”
“Your father knew that rejecting that young man would cause great deals of pain, so he made sure that when he died some of his assets were liquidated and put into a bank account as restitution. It was to be delivered as part of his last will and testament.”
“Why would it cause great deals of pain? I mean, he seemed fine.”
“Well, your father told me that rejecting a mate hurts the one rejected more than it does the one doing the rejecting but for wolves that are submissive in nature it’s ten times worse. For a while, your father thought the man would die because of it.”
Huh, it’s hard to think of the man I saw as submissive. “Are you sure he’s a submissive wolf?”
“Well, he’s not entirely wolf only half. Your father never told me what the other half was and if I’m honest I don’t think he really knew either. He probably could’ve found out, but I don’t think he wanted to know.”
“Why wouldn’t he want to know?”
“I think he was afraid that if he knew just what kind of man he’d rejected he’d realize he made a mistake. Don’t get me wrong, your father loved us, but I think if he’d followed the path fate intended he’d have been a lot happier.”
“No use dwelling on it now mom.”
“Are you alright honey? You sound different. Did something happen with oh what’s his name…”
“Aithusa. His name is Aithusa.”
“Right. Did something happen with Aithusa? He didn’t hurt you, did he?”
Hearing the concern in my mother’s voice sends my emotions over the edge and I have to choke back a sob. Thinking back to earlier and the way my mate just sent me away has me on the verge of tears.
“Honey, talk to me. What’s wrong?”
“When Dad died, the fated mate bond passed to me. Aithusa is my fated mate and he sent me away because of Dad. He thinks I’m going to do the same thing dad did, so he told me to go home.”
“I hope you didn’t listen to him.”
“I couldn’t help it. He did something to me when he looked me in the eye. It was like some form of compulsion. I didn’t know what I was doing until I was already on the road headed home. What do I do mom? He doesn’t want me.”
“Oh honey, I think it’s clear that he does want you. Seems to me he’s afraid of getting hurt again so he sent you away before you could get close to his heart. Are you going to let him do that or are you going to fight for him?”
Wiping the tears from my eyes, I steel myself with resolve and say, “I’m going to fight. Thanks mom.”
“Good luck honey.”
I hang up the phone and turn the car around. Full of determination, I head for Atlanta and my mate.
I almost always spend my nights off in the club. If I’m not doing a scene with my sub of the month then I’m enjoying drinks with friends. Tonight, it’s drinks with friends although I have a few subs vying for my attention. Word has gotten around that my recent contract has been terminated and a lot of the house subs are eager to be next in line. However, I’ve only got eyes for one person. He walked in about an hour ago and has been sitting at the bar. Both halves of me are in agreement that we’re glad he came back but we’re worried. He hasn’t made any moves and that has me feeling antsy.
Maybe you should make the first move.
That’s not going to prove anything. If he wants us he’ll have to come get us.
Stubborn ass.
I’m being practical. He might not want us at all.
He’s here isn’t he?
That doesn’t mean anything. He could be here trolling for a hook up.
You know this isn’t that kind of club.
No but there are people here willing to do scenes for a single night if sex is on the table.
I don’t think our mate is that kind of person.
You don’t know that.
Neither do you.
Sighing, I have to admit my wolf side is right this time. Taking another sip of my rum and coke, I look across to the bar and find my mate’s seat empty. Suddenly, the scent of jasmine and sage hits
me in the face and I look up to find him leaning over the back of the booth above my head. His breath tickles my ear as he says, “Dance with me?”
I nod and stand up, practically tossing aside the two subs who were clinging to each arm. I let my mate lead me onto the dancefloor and its then that I realize I don’t even know his name. He settles into a rhythm with his back against my chest and I wrap my arms around him, resting my chin on his shoulder so we can talk while we dance without being overheard. “I just realized I don’t know your name.”
“Brant. My name is Brant.”
“I like it. So, why did you come back Brant? I thought I told you to go home.”
“You did. I chose not to listen. I came back because I want to be with you. If you don’t want that, I need you to tell me.”
Letting out a sigh of relief, I press a kiss to his neck and say, “I want that, but I think we have a lot to talk about first.”
“There’s a diner not too far from here. We could get dinner and talk. If you want to that is. I don’t want to push. I know it’ll take some time for you to trust me.”
“It’s okay. Dinner sounds good. Why don’t we get some takeout and go back to my place? We have a lot to talk about and I think we’d be more comfortable there.”
“We’ll go to your place then.”
“Did you drive here?”
He shakes his head and says, “No, I took a cab from the hotel I’m staying in.”
“Okay. We’ll take my car then.”
I put a hand on the small of his back and lead him towards the front of the club. It’s a good thing I always settle my tab at the bar before I even take my drink to a table otherwise, we wouldn’t be able to make a quick exit. Once we’re outside, I lead him across the parking lot to where I’ve parked my Ford Mustang. After unlocking the doors, I lead my mate to the passenger side and open the door for him. Once he’s settled, I circle around to the other side and climb in.
When we’re on the road, I manage to ask, “So, what would you like for dinner?”
“Is there a Vietnamese place around here? I could really go for some spring rolls right about now.”
“There’s quite a few around here but the menu varies from each restaurant. If you want, we can wait until we get to my place. There’s a Vietnamese place a block away and we can have the food delivered. It’ll give us more time to talk.”
“Sounds good to me.”
“Then that is what we’ll do.”
I don’t live too far from the club. It’s only a fifteen-minute drive but with the rest of the trip being spent in silence it feels like hours. The apartment building I live in has a parking garage attached to it for residents. I park the mustang next to my Harley and climb out. The best part about living here is the parking garage has a door on each level connecting it to the apartment building so there’s no need to ride the elevator all the way down and walk down the sidewalk to get into the apartment building unless you don’t have a keycode to the door.
Brant follows behind me as I punch in the code to the door and open it. I make sure it latches behind me before continuing down the hall to my apartment. Once I’ve got the apartment door unlocked I gesture Brant inside, then lock the door behind us and rearm the alarm. When that’s done, I stroll through the place flipping on lights as I go.
Brant lets out a low whistle. “Nice place.”
“Thanks. The takeout menus are on the fridge, you can order whatever you want. I’m going to change my clothes really quick. Help yourself to whatever. I think there’s some beer and soda in the fridge. I’ll be right back.”
He nods, and I leave him to it. Once in the safety of my bedroom, I strip out of my clothes and put on a tank top and pajama bottoms. I’m not sure if any claiming will take place tonight, in fact it probably won’t but at least he’s not rejecting me. So, that’s a plus. Now, if I can just get through the talking stage without sending him running, that’d be great.
After sitting at the bar for an hour listening to a group of twink like subs chat about Master Aithusa terminating his most recent sub contract and how he’s in the market for another one, I decided my need for liquid courage before talking to my mate was overrated and dragged the man onto the dancefloor. I might not be the type to be a full-time sub but I’m more than willing to submit to my mate when he needs it. It’s on my list of things to talk about tonight. There’s a lot we need to discuss before any claiming is done. Dinner in his apartment is the perfect setting for it. He was right on that front. The things we need to discuss are better said in a comfortable, private environment. Keeps us from being interrupted and if we do decide to claim each other tonight, then we don’t have too far to travel before we find a bed.
I grab us a couple beers from the fridge and take a spot on the couch. Aithusa comes out of the bedroom and sits with one leg curled under him so we’re facing each other. “So, where shall we start?”
“I’m not a sub. I’ll do scenes with you at the club if that’s what you want, and I’ll accept your collar if you choose to give me one but outside of the club we are equals in every way. I don’t want a full-time Dom/sub relationship.”
“Neither do I. Yes, I like being a Dom and I’m sure what we do scene wise will be pleasurable for both of us, but I won’t force you. As for the collar, if I do give you one, it’ll be something you only have to wear when we go to the club. It’ll protect you from unwelcome advances. I won’t make you wear it all the time, unless you want to of course. The decision would be yours. What else?”
“You’re only half wolf, right? What’s the other half?”
He smiles and says, “I’m a full-fledged hybrid. Half wolf, half demon. I apologize in advance for when we have a mind link. What goes on inside my head would drive even the sanest person mad.”
“What do you mean?”
He blushes and says, “As you can see by my red eyes that my demon half is dominant right now. Because I’m a hybrid and I have two very different spirits, I’m kind of like a modern-day Jekyll and Hyde. If my wolf side was dominant right now, my eyes would be blue, and my personality would be completely different.”
“What does that have to do with our nonexistent mind link?”
His blush deepens as he says, “I sometimes have conversations with my other half inside my head. It’s like we’re two separate people in one body.”
Suddenly, his expression turns sad and he says, “Still sure you want to be with me?”
“Of course, I am. So, what if you have conversations with yourself. It doesn’t make you crazy, just unique. The way I see it, I’m getting two for the price of one.”
The smile he graces me with, literally takes my breath away. “Let’s continue this conversation, shall we?”
He nods. “So, living arrangements?”
I bite my lip and say, “You’d have to come back with me. My dad’s beta is holding the Alpha position for me until I get back.”
“I figured that would be the case seeing as Clay was heir apparent when I left. Is the pack more accepting now?”
“Yes. I gave them an ultimatum when I was named heir apparent. Accept a gay alpha or get out because I refuse to take a woman as a bond mate.”
I can see the relief in his gaze when he says, “Good. What about the BDSM situation?”
Unable to bear the distance any longer I scoot closer to him on the couch and touch his hand. “I have a house. I inherited it when I became Alpha, we can build a dungeon in it and there’s a human run BDSM club a few towns over that we can get a membership for if you want to do public scenes.”
“And my job?”
“If you want to work I won’t stop you, but you’ll be Alpha Mate and that does have its responsibilities.”
“Okay. What about kids? I know this is a discussion we should probably have at a later date but since we’re already talking about everything I thought I’d ask.”
“I do want them but not for a while. We can discuss surrogacy and adoption anothe
r time. Was there anything else we needed to address?”
He bites his lip and says, “Yeah, the subject of claiming.”
“What about it?”
“I can’t let you top. Not yet. I’m not ready for that. I’d be happy to let you bite me and I’ll wear the mark with pride, but I won’t bottom.”
I reach out and stroke his cheek, there’s no mistaking the fear in his eyes. “It’s okay, we’re equals remember? I’d never attempt to do anything to you that I wouldn’t expect in return. I’d be more than happy to let you top until you’re ready to let me have you. After that, we’ll switch. Sound fair?”
“Yes, that’s fair. I suspect I’ll be teaching you how to be a Dom then huh?”
I shake my head. “No sweetheart. That’s your thing not mine. As long as we’re equals in every other area of our relationship, I don’t mind submitting to you when it comes to the BDSM side of it.”
He leans forward and rests his forehead against mine. “There doesn’t have to be a BDSM side if you don’t want there to be. I’ll be happy with just having you.”
“No, you won’t but good try. I can tell it’s something you need, and I want to give that to you. Don’t think I missed the shiver that ran through you the other night when I said please after ordering my beer. You enjoy it and I won’t be the one to take that away from you.”
Without warning, he pulls me onto his lap and takes my lips in a carnal kiss that has my dick going from half-mast to hard in a matter of seconds. When we finally pull apart I know our discussion is over. I don’t want to give him the chance to send me away again so with a confidence I’m not sure I feel, I say, “Take me to bed sweetheart.”
He smiles and says, “With pleasure.”
How did I get so lucky? My mate is so kind and considerate and nothing like his dad.
Don’t go there. You don’t want to ruin the moment by thinking about H.I.M.
You’re right wolfie, thank you.
No problem snookums, you just get to claiming our mate.
Will do.
I lift Brant in my arms as I stand up and head for the bedroom. Once there I place him on the bed and grab the lube from the nightstand drawer so it’s within reach when I’m ready for it. Sitting on the bed on my knees, I lift Brant’s shirt from his body and try not to drool. Fuck, he’s beautiful and all mine.