She got up and slowly stood, balancing herself against the bed. I smirked and placed my hands behind my head as I watched her. “Need help?” I mused.
She playfully rolled her eyes. “I’m perfectly fine. I’m going to get cleaned up really quick,” she said as she gathered her clothes and disappeared out of the bedroom. I let out a deep sigh. Think, Mason; think. If I didn’t gather the courage to ask her out, even if it was only as friends, then she’d walk out that door and I’d probably never see her again if it were up to her. But what if she said no? She didn’t owe me anything. Tonight didn’t change what happened between us. If I weren’t paying her, I was pretty sure she would’ve run in the opposite direction when she saw me. But I had to try. Regardless of what her answer was, I knew I’d hate myself if I never even tried.
A few moments later, she reappeared fully dressed and retrieve her purse from the dresser. “I, um…I have to get going,” she said, giving me a small smile. “It was nice seeing you again, Mason.”
I quickly sat up and moved to the foot of the bed, retrieving the bathrobe from the floor. “Yeah, same. Wished you didn’t have to go,” I murmured.
She cleared her throat. “Every job has a time limit and we don’t spend the night with clients,” she replied, her voice indifferent. I nodded and went to retrieve my wallet, counting out a few bills before handing it to her without a word. She placed the money into her purse.
“Thanks,” she said with a small smile. “Well, good night.”
Do something. “Aaliyah,” I called behind her. She paused in the doorway and looked at me. “Um, I wanted to know if you wanted to get coffee or something sometime.” She raised an eyebrow at me and opened her mouth to speak, but I hurriedly added, “As friends. I know anything else is off the table right now, it’s just that…I don’t want it to be over ten years before I see you again.”
The silence that filled the room was terrifying and deafening before she finally released a deep breath. “Mason…tonight was great, but I don’t know. Having explosive sex doesn’t change anything.”
“I understand.”
“And I don’t know if I even want to let you back into my life,” she admitted. “I thought I was over what you’d done, but seeing you tonight has made me realized I’m not. And it doesn’t help that you seem to still be struggling with what broke us up in the first place.”
“So, getting clean would mean we could try again?” I asked, hearing the hope in my voice. “If that’s what you want—”
She shook her head. “You shouldn’t do this for me. You need to do it for yourself. I don’t know if I want to go down this road with you again. You’d have a lot of proving to do and there’s no guarantee that I’ll want to try again even if you get the help you need.” She ran a hand through her hair. “Having sex with you tonight also made me realize that all of my feelings for you aren’t gone.” She dropped her eyes to the floor and wrapped her arms around herself.
“I get it,” I said. “It’s mutual. I’m not asking you to forgive me or forget what I’ve done. But I hope I can at least get the chance to make things right. I don’t want to let you walk out of my life for a second time,” I murmured, closing the distance between us.
She looked up at me for a few moments. She reached into her purse and took out a pen before taking my hand into hers and writing on my palm. When she was finished, she planted a sweet kiss on my lips before she turned and left the suite. I looked down at my palm to see her number, moving to grab my phone to save it. A small grin formed on my lips as I shot her a quick text message.
Mason: So was that a yes to coffee?
No sooner than I put my phone down, a text message came through from her.
Aaliyah: I’ll think about it.
My grin turned into a full-blown smile as I flopped onto my back on the bed. If getting myself clean and on track gave me a chance at winning her back, I’d do whatever it took. I wouldn’t lose her again.
Chapter 5
Walking into the office the next morning felt different. I strolled in, coffee cup in one hand and a breakfast croissant in the other, whistling in between eating and drinking as I made my way to my office. I smiled at everyone and told them good morning, everyone giving me strange looks as if they’d never seen me in a good mood before. Even my father stopped his conversation to watch me pass. After the night I had with Aaliyah, there was nothing he could say today to bring me off cloud nine.
Aaron rushed down the hall toward me no sooner than I’d unlocked my office door.
“Can you believe Mrs. Kent? I actually don’t blame Mr. Kent for wanting to get a divorce,” he said when he caught up to me.
I entered my office and walked over to my desk. “What are you talking about?” I asked, putting down my coffee and breakfast as I sat down.
Aaron raised an eyebrow at me. “What do you mean what am I talking about? Didn’t you see the email her lawyer sent us and the email Mr. Kent sent as well?”
“I’m just getting here. I haven’t had time to check emails.”
“Hmm. They sent it last night while I was still at Hooters and while you were supposedly at home working.” He shook his head. “Unless you weren’t at home working.”
“Doesn’t matter what I was doing. I’ll check the emails and see what’s going on.”
“You didn’t pay that psycho a home visit, did you?”
I shuddered. “Hell no.”
Aaron sat in a chair across from me. “Last night was crazy though, wasn’t it? Still can’t believe she punched Malcolm in the eye,” he mused as I took a sip of coffee.
I sighed. “Yeah. I can bet Malcolm is still pissed.”
He let out a low whistle and shook his head. “Considering that he said he’s hoping he gets the job he applied for in Arizona so he can move far away from you…I’d say he was.”
I paused mid sip. “Wait, what? A job in Arizona? He didn’t say anything to me about that.”
“That’s just what he told us after you left. Maybe he was saying it out of anger or maybe it’s really true. You’ll have to ask him about it.”
“Yeah,” I mentioned idly, staring off into space as I processed the information he’d given me. “I’ll try to meet up with him today.”
“Cool. So about the Kent case,” Aaron started, trying to get us back on topic.
“Give me a second to review the email.” I turned to my computer, moving on autopilot as I pulled up my email. So many thoughts bounced around in my mind. Was Malcolm moving away because of me? Once my parents caught wind of this—if they hadn’t already— it would be one more thing my father could berate me for.
I scanned over the email from the lawyer and shook my head. “She called the police on him because he came over to see his children…all because she was upset about what happened in court. Now she wants full custody of the kids with supervised visits? Supervised visits for what?” I asked.
“According to the police report, it says that Mr. Kent smelled of alcohol and was belligerent, so she reported that he’d been violent towards her. If he really did that, it could hurt his chances for countering that.”
I sighed and ran a hand down my face. So much for my good morning.
“Right. I’ll give him a call and have him come in for another meeting. We’ll figure something out,” I said.
“Sounds good,” he said as he stood. “Oh, I knew there was something else I wanted to talk to you about. I also came in here to tease you about your good mood first thing in the morning. The last time I heard you whistling this early was back in college when you’d won our bet by snagging the most girls in a week.”
I chuckled and shook my head. “There’s nothing wrong with being happy.”
“Something had a part in making you happy. You’re usually not this chipper this early,” he mused with a smirk. “What happened and who was she?”
“Why do you think it’s a person? Can’t I—”
“Cut the shit, Mase. I know you’re
holding out on me,” he said, sitting back down. “I want to know everything.”
I let out a dramatic sigh. “It’s not even a big deal. Just ran into someone from high school.”
“And?”
“And what?”
“What happened? Who was it?”
“I saw Aaliyah,” I said, shuffling through a few papers on my desk to avoid making eye contact with him.
“Aaliyah? Who the hell is she?” he asked. I met his confused gaze, but didn’t say anything. I could see the gears in his head turning as he continued staring at me, probably trying to wrack his brain to remember who I was talking about.
“I told you about her once in college,” I said.
He shook his head. “Not ringing any bells.”
“I used to date her in high school.”
His eyes widened with recognition as he snapped his fingers. “That’s right. What’s going on with her? Where’d you see her?”
I cleared my throat. After what happened last night at Hooters, I definitely didn’t want to admit that I simply left early to go release some tension with an escort for the night. I also didn’t want to tell him that my high school sweetheart was said escort and that I was going to try to get back with her.
“We happened to be at the same gas station.”
Aaron smirked at me as if he didn’t believe me, but he didn’t say otherwise. “I see. So you’re happy because you happened to see your ex-girlfriend? Did you even get to talk to her?”
“Briefly. We exchanged numbers though.”
“Hmm. Well, I have to get to work. Let me know when Kent can get here for the meeting,” he said, walking toward the door.
“Will do,” I said after him, watching him as he disappeared out of my office. I sighed and leaned back in my chair. My mind went back to last night with Aaliyah, my fingertips tingling at the thought of touching her heated skin. The thought of being deep inside her was enough to make my cock twitch. I shook my head. I was supposed to be working on myself and I damn sure couldn’t do that if I was thinking about fucking her again.
You shouldn’t do this for me. You need to do it for yourself. Her words still played in my head and while she was right, at least doing it for her would help me stay focused until I was strong enough to go on my own willpower.
I pulled out my phone and opened her text message thread.
Mason: Haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since last night. Wish I could see your pretty face again soon. Can I take you out one day this weekend?
I hit send and put the phone face down on my desk. Maybe I’m getting ahead of myself. We’d only spent one night and I was already asking her out on an official date. What if asking her on a date would make her feel as if I was moving too fast? I ran a hand down my face. I hadn’t seen the woman in ten years before last night and now that I’d seen her, I couldn’t get her out of my mind or let her go a second time.
A text notification brought me out of my brooding. I turned the phone over to see a text from her and a preview of a picture she’d sent. A small smile pulled at my lips as I opened the message.
Aaliyah: I’m super busy with family stuff this weekend, but I’ll let you know when I’m available. In the meantime, here’s a picture until you can see my face again in person.
The picture was innocent enough. She wore a black sweetheart tube top, reminding me of when I’d kissed her chest and along the swells of her breasts the night before. I blew out a breath and focused on her beautiful face instead, her bright smile making my chest tighten with desire. Her curly hair was in a high ponytail, her seductive eyes hidden behind a pair of expensive sunglasses. Her face was bare of makeup, and her one dimple was just as cute as it was back in high school. Not much had changed about her other than her growing more beautiful with age.
With a sigh, I blacked out my phone and put it back down, turning back to my computer. Though I was disappointed that it would probably be a little while before I saw her again, the picture and thought of her would be enough for now. Winning Aaliyah back wouldn’t be easy, but I never backed away from any challenge.
*
On my way out of the office later that evening, my dad called me from down the hall. I turned to look at him, watching as he closed the distance between us. “I haven’t seen you all day. It feels as if you’re avoiding me,” he said when he reached me.
I shrugged. “Busy day.”
“I see.” He put his hands in his pockets with a sigh. “I know you probably think I was being hard on you yesterday, but you have to understand where I’m coming from.”
I fought the urge to roll my eyes. That was always his reasoning after he laid down the law. It was his way of apologizing while also letting you know that you brought it on yourself and he really had nothing to be sorry for.
“Yeah, I know,” I said, looking at my watch. “I have to go. I’m going to be late.”
“I wanted to tell you that your mother wants you over for dinner tonight,” he said, ignoring what I’d said. “She hasn’t seen you in a while and asked me to tell you she’s cooking since you never answer when she calls you.”
“I’m sorry, but I’m busy this evening. And if I don’t get out of here, I’m going to be late.”
“Where do you have to run off to that’s more important than spending time with your mother?” he asked, his voice firm.
“An SAA meeting, Dad. You know, the ones you told me I needed to go to when you threatened my job,” I snapped before I could stop myself. He looked at me with a raised brow, but didn’t say anything. “Can I go now?”
“I suppose so,” he said and walked away, leaving me standing there. I shook my head. Even when I was trying to do something right, it was still wrong. There was no “good on you, son,” or “I’m proud of you for taking the steps you need.” Had he not made it a requirement to go to these meeting in order to keep my job, I would’ve been convinced that he didn’t care. He probably didn’t, only caring when the law firm became involved.
I sighed and finally walked out of the building. There was no use dwelling on things I couldn’t fix.
*
I looked around the circle of men, all sitting in metal folding chairs in the basement of Redemption Ministry. Everyone looked at me with curious eyes, and I didn’t blame them. Everyone else wore casual clothes that was appropriate for the humid summer weather and here I was wearing a full suit, sticking out like a sore thumb. A tall man that looked to be in his late 40s with thin, red hair and tired green eyes finally joined the circled with a crate of books and smiled at everyone.
“Hey everyone. I’m Kyle and I’m a recovered sex addict. Welcome to this week’s meeting for Sex Addicts Anonymous,” he said.
The room echoed with multiple “Hi Kyle” responses from everyone in attendance. He walked around, gesturing for everyone to get a book from the crate.
“This is the book we’ll be using for today’s reading. If this is your first time here with us, no worries. You can sit and observe today if you’re not ready to talk,” he said, his eyes falling on me. I diverted my gaze to my lap. It wasn’t my first time coming here, but it had been quite a while since my last meeting. The last time I was here, there was a much older, chubby man who ran the meetings. I must’ve been away longer than I remembered.
I took one of the green books from the crate when he finally reached me. The cover was rather plain, with only the title and a small oval with clouds and the sun on it. Once everyone had a book, Kyle clasped his hands together. “Let’s get started, shall we?”
Everyone around me stood to their feet. I followed suit, a little confused as to what was happening. I didn’t remember much about the last meeting I’d gone to, but I didn’t remember having the meeting standing up. The other guys began locking hands around me and bowing their head. Right. The prayer at the beginning.
We recited the Serenity prayer and jumped right into reading different passages from the book. I yawned. If this was something I�
�d have to do a couple of times a week to keep my job, I was sure I would die of boredom.
“If you’re here, this means that you’ve taken the first step to recovery. Admitting you have a problem is one of the hardest things you can do. When it comes to sex addiction, it can be hard to determine whether you just enjoy sex or whether you’re addicted to it. Can anyone tell me what the signs are of an addiction?” He looked around the circle, but no one spoke. “Aww, you guys don’t have to be shy. This is a safe place to talk about something we’ve all suffered with.”
“Having sexual urges that you feel powerless over,” one man said, his voice low.
“That’s right, Tony. That’s one of the main symptoms that a sex addict displays. Anyone else?”
“Feeling shame after what you’ve done, but still unable to stop,” I said, without realizing it. Kyle looked at me and nodded.
“That’s an important one,” he’d said. “What’s your name?”
“Mason.”
“Well, Mason, welcome to the group. We’re glad to have you with us today. Thank you for your answer.” He looked around the circle. “Anyone else?”
We talked about how abstinence was important in our recovery. I knew that I was serious about getting myself together, but having no sex at all? I wasn’t too sure about that. When Kyle saw the unsure expression on my face, he gave me a reassuring smile. “It’s not about giving up sex cold turkey. Sex addiction isn’t even about the actual act of sex; it’s geared more toward the addiction we have to certain sexual behaviors. Our purpose here is to figure out what behaviors are healthy and which are addictive. You won’t change overnight, but learning more about yourself will help you move further along to recovery,” he explained.
Lawfully Screwed (Lawful Affair) Page 6