by John Hook
Unfortunately, that wasn't all there was to this view. The entire pain farm was on fire. Except I could see it wasn't really fire. It was the fire-like energy that Zara wielded. It was capable of the same destruction as any blaze at the right intensity, but it inflicted internal pain that went beyond the external pain of burning. It was like a neurotoxin. She even used it in light doses to create pain for pleasure, as I had found out, but it was clear there was no control here. This was rage. I watched Shirks running out of those low adobe buildings, screaming as their bodies burned both from within and without. The people in the towers couldn't run out. They were strapped in. They would burn in their harnesses until the harnesses burned away and then they would just dissolve, lost forever. I had tears in my eyes, but I felt anger in my gut. This was the pain wracking my body, but unlike all of those below me, I had begun to submerge the pain so I could function.
Guido didn't say anything. I didn't expect him to. He was a witness to madness.
I looked up in the sky. Zara was floating above the destruction, seemingly almost hypnotized by it, her fists balled at her sides.
“Zara!”
She turned, startled out of her reverie. She floated over to us with a slight smirk on her face.
“I see you finally found Kanarchan. Not much help, is he?”
Guido said nothing and his expression didn't change.
“What've you done, Zara? All these people... lost.”
“At least their pain will eventually end.”
“Their chance at life is ending as well. Who are you to decide that?”
“Right now life in this place isn't life. The only thing that matters is stopping the Angels. And this is the only way to do it, stopping them from completing the sword by cutting off their supply of raw materials on a large scale.”
I watched as towers began to crumble. As towers opened you could hear screaming as the gags must have burned away before the rest of the harness. As some screams died out, the haunting sound echoed around the canyon.
“I tried to get you to join me,” Zara continued. “We could have stopped them much earlier. You were too busy taking care of your friends to take the fight to the Angels. Someone has to.”
“Not this way, Zara. Not at any cost.”
“Yes, at any cost. If the Angels win, there is no coming back for any of us.”
“No. If we save anyone we save everyone.”
“And how do you plan to do that?” Zara's anger was accusing and she hit a nerve. I still didn't have an answer to that question.
“How about you?” Zara turned her anger on Guido. He said nothing. She spit fire disdainfully at his feet. He didn't move.
“This is war and the only thing that matters is that the Angels don't win.”
“You're wrong, Zara. This is about humanity. Our humanity. It is about reclaiming that humanity when everything around us is trying to crush it. Stop this now. Save what's left. Reabsorb your fire.”
“You want me to stop this now?”
Zara got an expression on her face I didn't like and she flew out over the pain farm. At first, astonishingly, I thought she might be doing what I asked. I should have known better. She spread her hands and started drawing all the fire up into her body. But then she began reversing the flow, creating a ball of fire between her and the pain farm. The ball became larger and larger. It changed from an orange-red color to yellow to blinding white. I could feel the energy build and a sense of dread filled me. However, all this was happening so fast I couldn't even get words out. Finally, she threw back her head and gave a cry that made me freeze up inside. The energy ball was almost as big as the pain farm and as she made her banshee cry, it hit the ground. There was a brilliant flash and I was flattened on the earth by a surge of pain that felt like it crippled every joint in my body.
I couldn't move for a few moments. Tears were streaming from my eyes. I felt every single death, every soul that was plunged from pain into unending darkness, every loss. Guido knelt down and touched me. I felt the pain subside to a tolerable level.
“I don't suppose I can give back the dreaming, can I?”
I stood up slowly. I dreaded looking out over the valley because I knew what I would see. The destruction was even more thorough than an atomic blast. Nothing remained standing. Everything was ash. No towers, no pipes, nothing but gray and white ground as flat and polished and lifeless as the island where the sky had broken. No bodies, no scrap, no signs that anything had existed here except the collapsed pipes going into the woods that were beyond the radius of the blast, final bits of green-yellow ooze spilling out on the ground.
“There are others.”
I spun my head in Zara's direction. Her voice was startling in the stillness that followed the destruction. I had still been mesmerized by the scar that had been left at the bottom of the valley. As I looked at Zara, I no longer felt anger. I felt an odd fear that she might turn out to be right. That I couldn't both save people and stop the Angels. I shook my head as if I could as easily shake out that thought.
It didn't matter if I couldn't do that. It was my path. It was what I would have to do even if I failed. For me, it was the only choice and Zara had just driven that home for me.
“You plan to keep doing this?”
“Yes. There are pain farms even larger than this one. I will take away all from the Angels. I should have done this long ago.”
“Oh, you have done quite enough, Shade.”
Both Zara and I turned. Floating in the sky was the Angel. Or one of the Angels. They all looked the same so we didn't know whether the Angel we encountered was always the same.
Zara flew at the Angel in a rage, setting her on fire. The Angel effortlessly slapped her away, sending her crashing into the hillside near myself and Guido.
“There they are, the last of the hopeless, who have unwittingly aided us.”
For a moment I tuned out on what the Angel was saying as a sensation rose up from the base of my spine. I don't know how, but I instantly knew what it meant.
“The sword! It's complete!”
The Angel smiled the sweetest Blue Fairy smile. I remember falling in love with a smile like that watching Pinocchio as a kid.
“Yes. We were very near, but the final blast of pain on this kind of scale, supplied by the dear Shade's fire, was the final surge we needed.”
“Wait!” I shouted. I actually had no idea what I could possibly say to slow the Angel down, but it didn't matter. She flexed her wings and sailed away over the hills.
“Well, good then.” Zara pulled herself up and reformed her fiery rug, jumping on.
“Good?”
“The only way to truly end this is to take away the sword.”
Without even waiting for my answer, she flew off after the Angel.
I looked at Guido.
“This is it, isn't it? This is where I find out what I can do. And if I fail...”
“There is no question of succeeding or failing. There is only what you can do and it changes the world.”
“Is that supposed to be encouraging? You know I hate that shit.”
Guido grinned but added nothing.
“To the Mountain?”
“As you wish,” Guido replied.
21.
This was it.
There were no more journeys to make. No more conversations about what to do. There was only the Mountain and the sword and the importance of what would happen in the next short bit of time.
It was strangely quiet inside the Mountain, though I knew not for long. We had arrived here nearly instantaneously, Guido and I. We had gotten here before the others, before, in fact, the Black Angel realized there had been a change.
The sword towered up. It was still in its scaffolding, but it was glowing, starting to fill the vast chamber with light. Unlike when I had seen it before, it was not only complete but appeared finished and tooled. Gone was the patchwork look of random splashes of alloy glopping across its surface. It wa
s as if someone had polished it smooth and, from what I could see behind the scaffolding, the blade was like a mirror.
Tendrils of energy radiated out from the circle at the base of the hilt, out of which the blade extended. The white tongues of energy traveled down the sword and extended out in all directions. They snapped like whips at the scaffolding and it gave way, splintering, pieces flying across the room. Tweedledee and Tweedledum showed up with Blaise and Kyo and Izzy and Saripha. Tweedledee and Tweedledum disappeared again, probably to bring Roland and Anika.
Blaise walked up to me. “I'll watch from the entrance. If I don't like what I see I'll signal Izzy, who will fire an arrow. Kyo and the others, if they get here, will drop the rocks. I'll try and get a nod from you before we do it.”
“Don't bother, Blaise. I trust you. If things have gone that sideways you probably won't have time to check with me.”
Blaise and Izzy walked to the entrance of the chamber. Blaise stayed there in the shadows while Izzy exited.
I grew myself large enough to handle the sword. Saripha did the same thing, which startled me.
“When did you learn that?”
“I’m a talented witch. The whole point of a glamour is you can bend it to your will.”
We caught a motion in the darkness and the Black Angel climbed down into the chamber. She was a blending of Rox and the Black Angel. I wasn't sure how it worked. In some manner, the Black Angel had inhabited Rox in a hidden portion of her psyche—or maybe her soul—until it came time to emerge. She had taken possession of Rox, but somehow bits of Rox emerged. Every time I saw the Black Angel, more and more of her features were Rox. The Black Angel usually let Rox talk to me.
“Get out of our way; we don't have much time. The others know the sword is ready, too.”
“You know, if I didn't know better, I'd say you're avoiding me.”
“I can't banter with you, Quentin. The Black Angel won't let me.”
“How about it, Crispy? Let her go so we can have a last few moments together.”
I wasn't precisely sure what I was trying to accomplish. I just felt that having Rox returned would open up options in confronting the Black Angel.
Rox's features receded from the face as the voice changed.
“I'm done talking to you. We have no more time.”
“You are correct about that, survivor. It's time to end your plight.”
Three Angels appeared, hovering above the sword, each one as large as we were.
“Wow. It's like Thanksgiving. The whole family’s here and none of them get along. Tell you what, I'll carve the turkey.” I lunged for the sword but was immediately blown back against the rock walls of the chamber. Both one of the Angels and the Black Angel made the same motion, so I'm not sure which one was responsible for stopping me. Maybe both. Another Angel motioned and the Black Angel flew back into the darkness.
One of the Angels reached for the sword. An orange glow started to fill the chamber. Suddenly all three Angels were assaulted by countless Yarwalli. It wasn't entirely clear whether the flaming bodies had any effect on the Angels, but their sheer numbers overwhelmed them and beat them back. They were unable to dislodge them. Zara had flown in from the opening to the ocean and was rushing for the sword. I threw myself in her path. She was so blindly focused on the sword she hadn't been anticipating a body block. She fell from her flaming carpet and hit the ground, screaming and cursing. I figured the next thing I was going to get was a flood of fiery pain, but I didn't much care.
I noticed a dark mass moving towards the sword. I could feel a rush as I stretched with my hand to grab it. I was hyper-focused on the sword hilt. Both my hand and another dark hand closed on the hilt at the same time.
We stood on either side of the sword. It glowed even more brightly. The chaos of Angel and fire demon going on around us became silent, although I could still see it. Tendrils of the white energy wove around our arms like vines and encased our bodies. We raised the sword and it was effortless. It shattered the rocks of the cavern above us. I panicked. The rocks must be falling on the others. We floated into the sky. Energy radiated everywhere. Cracks opened up in the ground. The ocean started churning and flooding the land.
We’re destroying everything, I thought. All those people I tried to save are gone. Their faith in me wasted. In the end, my best wasn't good enough.
Then I remembered what Guido said.
“There is only what you can do and it changes the world.”
I hadn't done anything yet. But what was there left to do?
Another memory of Guido.
“Trust yourself to figure this out. You have the full power of the dreaming. Change the dream.”
Change the dream. The universe was literally falling apart and my solution was to meditate.
I tuned out the world shattering around me. I even tuned out having to hold onto the sword. It had attached itself to both of us. I closed my eyes. I felt like I was falling, but I didn't care. As long as I had breath I had life. I focused on that breathing. I felt my energy and willed it to expand. It started as a blue light at the base of my spine. As many times before, it glowed with each breath, my lungs like bellows. As it expanded I saw an intricate marbling pattern of purple. And containing it all was a rim of gold. I knew these were symbols my mind worked with from all of my training with Saripha, with Azar, with Guido. I still didn't understand it all. Maybe I never would. Saripha had taught me something I never would have thought I would learn. Faith.
“Trust yourself to figure this out.”
Not so much faith in a higher power, although maybe that's part of it, nor even just faith in myself, but faith in something bigger than me, even if it’s something that works through me.
I reached out with my energy and encountered the energy of the sword. Forged of metal and pain, it was a dark energy. It wasn't evil, but it was unstable, dangerous and destructive. However, it was just a tool. It took apart universes, but anything taken apart can be reassembled. Harmonizing with the sword required something different than I was used to. When I harmonized with the energy in a door to open it, the door’s energy and my energy became sympathetic. Harmonizing with the sword was more like interlacing unlike energies so they balanced each other.
I expanded my energy even further to gather in the energy from the Dark Angel. I found two sources of energy, which wasn’t a surprise. In fact, it was a relief because it meant somewhere in there Rox had her own identity still. When I connected to her energy, I knew it instantly. I felt as I always did in her presence. It already had interweaving of darkness and light and I was happy that the darkness was hers and not the Black Angel’s. The energy of the Black Angel I also knew at once. It felt like a great darkness at the bottom of which was unrelenting sorrow. There was no hope here. She had watched her race perish at the hands of the Idiri. There was nothing to live for. There was only the desire for revenge. Except… I probed the sad darkness deeper. There was a tiny seed of compassion. It had been planted by the young girl, Adaxa. It had moved this creature of sorrow to save her life when the sky shattered.
All of this, Rox and the Black Angel, these energies, I had to draw together. Harmonizing some, weaving and balancing others, until I had formed a whole and a space to place it in. I didn't know it at the time, but it was what Saripha had prepared me for when we would take meditative journeys into distant worlds. I thought they were just illusions. However, they were creations.
I opened my eyes. We were sitting in a circle, floating in what otherwise was a gray emptiness. It was probably symbolic. The dreaming often is. But it might also mean we had destroyed everything and this circle was all that was left.
It didn't matter. It mattered what we did with it.
Across from me sat the Black Angel. To my right sat Rox. In the middle of the circle was the sword standing up, point sunk into the ground. And finally, taking a position to my left in the circle, was Rooni.
We all got up. Rox ran over and threw her arm
s around me.
“I don't know if this means we’ve perished, but I'm glad I got to touch you before we go.”
“I guess it would be too annoying for the others if we decided to have a really friendly reunion.”
Rox smiled widely. “Nice to know you haven't gotten too cosmic for such vulgarities.”
I turned a little stiffly to the Black Angel and Rooni. I wasn't sure how Rooni had gotten here, but Saripha had said she could navigate through the multiverses, so it didn't seem much of a stretch that she could find her way into the dreaming. However she got here, for now she remained in her cat form so I wasn't going to find out.
“Where are we?” the Black Angel demanded.
“We’re in a place in which we have to agree on how we use the sword.”
“Why?” Rox appeared puzzled. “You created this place, didn't you? You control this place.”
“You are right about the first part, but wrong about the second part. We are all connected to the sword because we grabbed it at the same time. I can't do anything without all agreeing to it. And the same for all of you.”
“We have to destroy everything. The multiverses will reform themselves and some new life will emerge. It's the only way to be sure the Idiri cannot win.”