I watched him as he thought of something to ask me. His tongue darted out to moisten his lips and that small action had my nerve endings on high alert. He looked me right in the eye then asked, 'are you happy?'
'Are you?' I shot back. 'Is anyone?' I laughed. He just sat and watched me, waiting for my truthful answer. I needed help with this one so I lifted my glass and took a long drink, when I placed my glass back down I looked in to his eyes; in this light they seemed a dark blue. 'I think in some ways I am. But I also think that I could be happier. I have my good and bad days just like everyone else but I think generally I am happy, or content with my lot anyway.'
His expression didn't change and I watched as he dropped his gaze to the cards between us scooping them all up in to a pile then placing them on the table. He turned and looked back at me. 'Can I ask you something else?' His tone was serious and I wondered what it was he could possibly want to know.
'You aren't even going to give me the chance to try and beat you?' I joked. The mood had gone a little too serious and I was starting to panic.
'April.'
My name on his lips had me drop the smile from mine and really look at him; whatever he was going to ask I felt as though I had to let him. I took a breath to steady myself. 'You can ask me anything. I'm not one to keep things from people, if there is something you want to know, just ask.'
He scooted a little closer to me and then lifted my hand from where it rested in my lap. He looked down at our hands and slowly began to stroke his thumb over my knuckles. The sensation sent shivers and tingles through my hand and up my arm and it spread further through my body until it completely filled me. He looked back up into my eyes. 'Are you dating? I mean are you… seeing anyone?'
I shook my head. 'Why?' My voice came out no louder than a whisper and I prayed that his next words weren't, just curious.
He licked his lips again. 'Because, I don't want to tread on anyone's toes when I kiss you again. Once I could forgive myself for but twice would be pushing it.’
I stared at him, trying to let his words sink in. The combination of those words and his deep, rich, voice was making me a little dizzy, although the gin didn't help, but I tried to focus on what was happening. Nate scooted a little bit closer and was now sitting on the middle cushion of the sofa; he was close enough for me to smell his aftershave and feel the warmth radiating from his body.
He reached up with his free hand and slowly brushed a lock of my hair behind my ear then stroked his thumb softly across my cheek. I leaned my face into his hand and I felt my eyes flutter closed at the comfort of it. I anticipated our kiss, knowing now that it wouldn't be like our first. Our kiss on the beach had been spontaneous, and urgent, and unexpected, but this one was thought about. They did say that the second kiss was the most important. This was the kiss that I would remember. This kiss I would store away and save for long lonely nights.
I felt him lean forward and his breath mixed with my own. His hands moved slowly, one from my face in to my hair. The other hand moved from my own and travelled up my arm and around my back slowly pulling me forward.
I waited in anticipation for the moment that our lips touched. I knew that I would have to savour and remember every moment, every touch and taste and sensation that he made me feel.
Our lips met and I leaned into the kiss. He tasted of whiskey; oaky and spicy with a hint of vanilla. He kissed me slowly as if he was trying to memorise every part, every movement. I wrapped my arms around his neck pulling myself closer to him. Nate moved his arms so they wrapped around me then he slowly leaned back, taking me with him so that I was straddling his hips and lying on his chest. Our kiss was slow, and gentle, and perfect.
After what seemed like hours I lifted my head and looked down at his face and watched his eyes slowly flutter open, the colour I now couldn't describe as anything but uniquely Nate. He smiled up at me and I knew then that I was falling, fast and hard and it was going to be really hard to get back up. I wanted to do anything and everything I could to keep him but I knew, in less than four days’ time, I would go back to my life and he would go back to his, and I would have to give him up.
'What's wrong?' He brushed the hair that had fallen over my eyes back over my ear, the look of concern on his face was so endearing I knew that my worries had shown on my own.
I smiled sweetly and dropped a quick kiss to his lips. 'Nothing is wrong. It's just...' What do I say? I couldn't tell him the truth. I wanted him to be the man that I didn't keep anything from, the man I could share my fears and dreams with, but he was going to leave. He had so much ahead of him and I knew I couldn't fit into his life.
'It's just, what?' He stroked the back of his hand over my cheek.
'It's just been a long time that's all.' I sent him a small smile.
'Men are idiots,' he whispered then gently pulled me back down. This kiss was more urgent and demanding and his hands moved from my hair to my waist, around to my back and then lower to my bottom, they seemed to be everywhere all at once.
I clung onto his jumper, just savouring the heat and the feel of him against me and not wanting to let go, not just yet. I knew the day would come, and all too soon, when I would have to say goodbye but it wasn't tonight. Tonight I could enjoy the delicious things he was doing with his tongue and his hands. I would make sure that I would memorise every little moan and murmur he made, and the way he tasted. Those were the things I would recall late at night, back in my flat, alone and struggling to sleep.
I wasn't quite sure how long we stayed like that, laid out on the sofa kissing and touching but a quick look at my watch made me realise that if we didn't head to bed now then we wouldn't get any sleep at all. I wouldn't have minded but I knew Nate was tired from working so hard.
I climbed off him and looked down at his pouty face, the one he had used to get me to make him a mug of coffee only that morning. I stood over him and placed my hands on my hips. After a moment he swung his legs off the cushions and sat upright. He took one of my hands and pulled me gently so I was standing between his legs, when he looked up at me my heart melted. His hands moved up my legs and rested on my waist as he leaned his forehead against my belly. I pushed my fingers into his soft dark hair and we stayed that way for a moment; how was it that we had become so intimate? We had only known each other for two days but I felt close to him. I wanted to protect him and care for him and make sure that he was happy and safe. I wanted to spend time with him and really get to know him, the real him. I stroked my fingers over the back of his neck.
'Come on,' I whispered and felt him nod against me then lift his head and smile.
He stood then placed a soft, slow, kiss to my lips. Lacing his fingers through mine he led me to the door then along the hallway and up the stairs; for a moment I thought he was going to turn right and take me to his room but he led me to the left and to the door of my own. He didn't open the door he just stopped in front of it and pulled me to him again.
'Sweet dreams.' He lowered his head and kissed me then smiling down at me for a moment he turned and walked down the landing. I watched him as he paused at his own bedroom door. I knew what he was doing; he was waiting for me to push open my door and step inside. I sent him a small smile then turned the handle and stepped over the threshold pushing the door closed behind me until I could no longer see him.
I leaned back against the wood and let out a long breath. Then I felt the grin spread across my face. Tomorrow I was sure I would think of all the reasons why it had been a bad idea but tonight I was going to pull on my pyjamas, climb under the duvet, and dream of amazing kisses and the most beautiful blue, green eyes.
Chapter Fifteen
Nate
I rolled over and stretched my arm across the mattress and let out a disappointed sigh. Sometimes I wished my mother hadn't raised me to be a gentleman, if I wasn't then April might be lying next to me and I could spend the morning showing her everything I had dreamed of last night. Instead I was lying alone and co
ntemplating taking a cold shower. I did take a moment to remember how it had felt kissing her, her body lying over mine. She was curvy and soft in the most tantalising way and when I kissed her I didn't need anything else.
I took a deep breath then opened my eyes to the light streaming in through the gap in the curtains and as the weather report had said it was going to be another dry crisp day I knew I would need to take advantage of it before the snow eventually travelled south enough to reach us. I really didn't enjoy running in the snow.
I threw the duvet off then turned to lift and drop it back onto place. I hated an unmade bed, especially one that was only messy from sleep. Moving over to the window I pulled the curtains fully open revealing my view of the driveway and the cars parked there. I smiled at the thought of taking April for a drive in my Jag; having the chance to take her away from the house and everyone and to just be with her was an opportunity I wasn't going to pass up - I just wondered when I might get the chance.
I turned from the window and moved over to my chest of drawers to pull out a pair of jogging bottoms and a t-shirt. I changed quickly then grabbed my hoodie off the chair in the corner and pulled it on. I knew I had left my trainers in the kitchen so I picked up my iPod off the nightstand and headed down the stairs and into the kitchen.
'Good morning darling. Did you sleep well? My mother was placing her empty plate and mug into the sink and turned the tap on. Ella was sat at the kitchen table, her head bent over the morning paper.
'I did thank you.' I moved to her side and dropped a kiss on her cheek.
'Oh good, and how was your card game?'
At the words 'card game' Ella's head shot up from the paper. 'You played cards? With April?'
I turned from my mother towards Ella and smiled as the memories flooded back into my mind. 'I did.'
'Well, I hope you weren't playing for money. April isn't the best when it comes to card games.'
I felt my smile broaden at the events of our game. She may have lost impressively when it came down to it but overall I think we could call it a draw by the end of the night. 'No, no money. Just for fun.'
Ella turned her attention back to the paper. 'That's alright then.'
Mum had finished washing her dishes and had left them to drain on the side. 'Right then I'm off, I have to go and meet the vicar.' With no more explanation she walked from the room.
I quickly made a round of toast, not wanting to head out on my run with an empty stomach and dropped myself into the seat opposite Ella. 'What's the weather report say about us getting snow?'
She didn't lift her head just continued reading the article in front of her. 'Looks like it might hit tomorrow.'
I nodded and took a bite of my breakfast. I leaned forward slightly, trying to get a look at what had her so engrossed but she pulled the paper closer to her and leaned back in her chair. Then a moment later she closed the pages and folded it up throwing it down next to her. She looked up at me and I wondered if she was okay. It was early enough for her to still be in her pyjamas but she was up and dressed and seemed to be in a weird mood. Her chair scraped across the tile floor as she stood. 'Will you tell April that I'm meeting up with a friend and won't be back until later?'
'Sure, but don't you want to let her know yourself?' She was acting like something was up and knowing her it would be something she would keep bottled up until she sorted it herself or got desperate enough to ask for help. I was beginning to worry but knew not to push her.
Ella shook her head. 'She's still asleep and I don't want to wake her, she deserves a rest. Tell her that I will text her later.' She sent me a small smile, 'thanks Nate.'
'Anytime.' She turned and strode out of the room and a moment later I heard the front door open and close behind her. I heard her car start up and head off down the lane and towards the village. I was going to have to ask April to see if she knew if there was something wrong. I didn't like the thought of my little sister not being happy.
I finished my toast before retrieving my trainers from the back door and sitting back in the chair to tie them. I looked up once I was done and saw April standing in the doorway. I felt the grin spread across my face and I rose out of the chair and crossed the room to her. 'Good morning.' I took her hands in mine and dropped a light kiss to her lips. 'Did you sleep well?'
She looked at me for a moment then slid her hands from mine and moved away from me and over to the kettle. 'I slept very well, thank you.' I watched as she set about making herself her morning coffee and doing everything but looking me in the eye.
I wondered what could have possibly happened between last night and this morning for her to be acting so cool. She had seemed happy and flirty when I left her at her bedroom door and I wracked my brains to think what it was I had done to upset her.
She stood with her back to me and I moved so I stood behind her then gently placed my hands on her shoulders and turned her to face me. 'What's wrong?' I stooped a little so I could look her in the eye.
She looked about the kitchen. 'Where are your mum and Ella?'
That was what she was worried about, Mum and Ella finding out what had happened last night. I lifted my hand and tucked a stray lock of her hair over her ear. 'They're both out. Mum had some meeting with the vicar and Ella has gone out to visit a friend, she said she will text you later.' Her expression didn't change, 'are you sure you're alright?'
She looked at me for a moment then let out a breath. 'Yeah, I'm okay,' she rose up on her tiptoes and pressed her lips against mine. Before I could wrap my arms around her waist and give her a proper good morning kiss she had turned and finished making her mug of coffee.
'Any plans for today?' I reached around her, lifted her mug and took a sip before handing it back to her.
I watched as she wrapped her hands around the mug protectively then took a sip of her own. 'I have some last minute shopping to do so I'm going to brave the battlefield of Christmas shoppers.' I let out a laugh, I Ioved the way she phrased things. She took another sip of her coffee then her eyes flew to mine. 'Wait, did Ella take her car?' I nodded. 'Shit. I was hoping I could have borrowed it.'
I looked at her worried face and smiled at how cute she looked. 'I can take you.'
Her gaze flew up to mine and those hazel eyes were like a punch to the stomach. 'I don't mind driving you, and I did say I would take you out in the F-type.'
Her smile spread across her face and I loved that I was the one to make her happy. 'Oh my God that would be amazing, thank you.'
'It's no bother. Can you wait until I get back from my run?' She nodded and I reached up and placed a hand on either side of her face. I lowered my head to hers and pressed my lips against her coffee warmed ones. I felt her relax into it and wrap her arms around my waist, pulling me fractionally towards her. When our kiss broke I placed a quick one to the tip of her nose. 'I won't be long.' She nodded and I dropped my head for another quick kiss to her lips.
I stepped away and walked over to the back door, pulling it open I called for the dogs to follow me and once everyone was out I pulled it closed behind me.
I walked down the path and at the end did a couple of stretches. Once warmed a little I pulled my iPod out of the pocket of my hoodie and pushed the earphones into my ears and hit play. I started at a slow jog, up and over the sand dune then when my feet hit the flat sand I picked up my pace. It was easier to run along the damp sand at the water's edge and not wanting to push myself too hard I settled at an easy pace.
I had always loved to run and it has been a big part of my daily routine. It was harder when I was away from home. I usually had to stick to a strict filming schedule and only managed to fit in a run here and there. Back in London I would run every morning as early as I could so that I would avoid any crowd in the park and also so I wouldn't miss any meetings Ian had planned for me. Thinking about Ian brought my mind around to my phone still sitting on the mantel in the living room. I had almost forgotten about it since April had taken it from me and swi
tched it off. I knew I would have to at least check my messages at some point today but the idea of spending time with April was more appealing.
I felt the grin spread across my face at just the thought of her. I could understand her concern over Ella and Mum knowing, we hadn't even met two days ago but that didn't stop me wanting her. There was just something about her. I had been attracted to her from the moment that I met her but there was something else there too and I wanted to find out what it was.
I was getting tired so slowed my pace, clearly a late night and a couple more whiskeys than I was used to didn't help with a morning run in the freezing cold. I was going to have to head back soon and I wondered if April would be showered and dressed by the time I got back. The thought of her standing under a hot shower and perhaps me joining her flooded into my head and I stopped my run altogether. I knew from the little exploration I had managed last night that she had a great body, not one of those skinny model bodies you see plastered in magazines but a real body, all curves and hips and boobs and I wanted to strip her naked and get an up close and personal view of her.
I turned, and started a slow jog back to the house. I needed to get a grip. From April's reaction in the kitchen I was going to have to take it slow, get to know her a little better and reassure her that I wanted to see where it was going to go and that Ella and Mum would be understanding about us. Us, I hadn't been an 'us' in a while and the idea of it felt right when I thought of April. My last relationship had only lasted three weeks and I had come to realise that dating actresses seemed good on paper but just wasn't right for me. I wanted someone who could keep me grounded and remind me of what was important, family and friends and being true to yourself; not parties, popularity and money.
Chapter Sixteen
April
I felt bad about acting off when I had seen Nate in the kitchen. It was like I was having an internal battle with myself; on one side I wanted to spend time with him - he had looked at me and kissed me like no other man ever had and I wanted as much of it as I could take – but then on the other hand I knew it wasn't likely to last. I wasn't the right girl for him; it was as simple as that.
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