The Willingness to Burn

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The Willingness to Burn Page 14

by J. P. London


  The parking lot unfolded in front of them as Andy revved the engine. It was his way of letting them know he was there. A few people looked over and watched him park the muscle car.

  “Yo,” Andy said and motioned over to the left. “Your cousin is a fucking fool, bro.”

  Jace glanced over and saw Corey, a skinny kid. His body was tall and lanky from a growth spurt but still not filled out. He was wearing a white sleeveless shirt His arms adorned with cheap tattoos, and his head, as always, appeared to be filled with angst. He stood opposite of three other kids. One of them threw up an arm and shoved Corey. The two stood inches from each other, the venom in their words obvious even from this distance.

  From the approaching car, Jace was able to recognize David, a boy that he had known but wouldn’t call a friend, as the person who just shoved Corey. David and Jace had always had a, “You don’t fuck with me I won’t fuck with you” relationship. Corey, on the other hand was unable to maintain such a relationship in those days, and not just with David, with anyone. Jace recognized the taller man as Seth, someone he had never met before but had heard about. Seth was a very tall kid and often hung out with David. It only made sense.

  “And there’s Kate.” Andy motioned a few feet away from Corey.

  “All right, leave the door unlocked, we’re not gonna be here long.”

  “Yo, you need to just let your cousin get his ass kicked so that he fucking learns.”

  “I can’t, dude.”

  “Why not?”

  “It’s a family thing.”

  “Yeah, yeah. Family first, right?”

  “That’s right.”

  Jace opened the car door.

  “You’re on your own.”

  Jace got out of the car then leaned in through the open door. “Yo, you want me to fuck both of them tonight?”

  Andy said nothing.

  “Then get out the car and show this bitch what type of man you are.”

  “All right,” Andy conceded then got out of the car. The two walked over to the dispute. Katie took notice of Jace approaching and walked up to him.

  “Jace, your cousin …”

  “I know. Get in the car, both of you,” he looked at Holly.

  “But we …”

  “Get in the car,” Jace said calmly, and Katie nodded and grabbed Holly’s hand. The two girls began slowly walking over to the Mustang and disappeared from Jace’s sight as his young mind filled with rage in anticipation of an early night-ending brawl.

  “Three on one that doesn’t seem very fair,” Jace called out. The tension of the four men broke momentarily as they all turned to acknowledge the new player who had just entered the game.

  “This ain’t none of your business,” David said, barely letting his eyes leave Corey.

  “I’m making it my business,” Jace said as he closed in on them and stood next to his cousin.

  “You don’t want none of this, homie,” David said, puffing his chest out.

  “Why don’t you step off? No need for this,” Jace said in a futile attempt to resolve the conflict before it escalated.

  “This motherfucker won’t stop running his mouth.”

  “Fuck you!” Corey said, his words saturated with confidence as his side’s numbers swelled to even the odds.

  “Fuck me?”

  “Hold up,” Jace said, stepping between Corey and David, pushing Corey back. Jace knew that he had one last chance for the situation not to escalate but it was a slim chance at best. Corey would never back down. All he could hope was that David was a more rational person.

  “This isn’t happening.” Jace turned to look at David. “Why don’t you just take a walk?”

  “Oh, me take a walk?”

  “Yeah, I’m asking you to.”

  “Fuck you!” David said, preparing for battle.

  “Oh, fuck me? Well, it was worth the try.”

  Jace looked away to his right then turned his body and threw his right arm out with force, landing it directly on David’s chin. He followed with a left, then another right. The man hit the ground.

  The taller opponent, Seth, responded in kind and landed a fist on the left side of Jace’s jaw. The ringing sound of the punch overtook Jace’s senses and shook his balance. Jace looked up at the man who had just hit him. He looked as though he was about to say something, but Andy came across with a wild right hook and landed it firmly on his cheekbone. The force sent Seth to the ground and Andy stood over him and dropped another right for good measure. Both Andy and Jace turned and looked at the last man standing. Both men peered at him and stepped forward, closing the distance. Jace turned and spit blood out on the floor.

  “Three against one still seem fair?” Jace said as he lunged at the last man and took him to the ground. He sat on his chest and rained down four or five punches into his face. Each blow coming with anger but not for the men. For something else. It was the swallowed wrath of a man who was doing what he had to do, not what he wanted to do. The last man standing was no longer standing, he was instead laying nearly unconscious on the floor. Jace pressed against his chest and stood up.

  Corey stared at Jace and didn’t say anything.

  “Did you get hit?”

  Corey shook his head.

  Jace grabbed him with force and threw him up against a nearby car.

  “Stop doing this shit! I won’t always be there.”

  Corey smirked. “Yes, you will” Corey shoved off of Jace, his body recoiling against the car and back to a standing position with Jace’s hands still firmly secured against his stretched-out sleeveless shirt.

  “You gotta knock this shit off,” Jace said in a strong tone.

  “Yo, he was talking shit!”

  “Shut the fuck up! This is another fucking fight I’m in because of you.”

  “Jace,” Corey pleaded.

  “Next time I’m helping them.” He motioned over his shoulder to the guys on the floor.

  “Yo, we gotta go,” Andy warned. Jace looked at him and saw him staring out into the RJ’s glass storefront. The owner was standing behind the glass on a cordless phone whose other end was undoubtedly connected to the police.

  “Get the fuck out of here.” He let Corey go and ran with Andy back to the Mustang where Katie and Holly were standing with the doors open and one foot in the back seat. The girls retreated to the backseat and pulled the seats back. The two young men got in and started the Mustang. The car roared, and the two couples peeled out of the parking lot.

  Chapter 28

  Anna

  We left the restaurant and he walked me out to my car. He had a very old school gentlemen behavior to him and I was so into that. I mean, at that point, we were totally sleeping together as long as he didn’t do anything horrible, but something told me this guy wouldn’t. I have a sense about people, I can tell these things.

  I gave him a long passionate kiss, and I pulled the back of his hair a bit so he knew I was going to be good in bed. I wanted to give him something to think about later when he was all alone.

  “So I’ll see you next week?”

  “You bet your ass you will.” He grinned at me. We kissed again, and he slapped my ass. I am so going to sleep with this guy. I got in the car to leave. He stood outside in the cold and watched me until I was safely on my way. As soon as I was clear of him, I called my non-sexual life partner, Brian.

  “Hey there,” he said with a happy tone.

  “Hey, so I just walked out of the restaurant.”

  “Yeah? How did things go with the new guy?”

  “Good,” I said with a big smile. “I feel like he might be someone special.” My smile was coming through in my voice; I could hear it plain as day. I was sure Brian could too.

  “Yeah?”

  “Yeah, I can really feel it.”

  “Yeah, was there a vision or something?” Brian asked.

  “Nah, just a good feeling.”

  “Oh, cool.”

  “Yeah, so he works in fin
ance, and I don’t know why, but I really like him.”

  “Yeah?”

  “He’s really nice, and he has really good hair.”

  Brian laughed. “That’s important.”

  “Yeah it is, and he’s older so that means he’s not going to lose any, right?”

  “Depends, how much older?”

  “I don’t know, I think like thirty-four.”

  “Nah, if he made it to thirty-four without losing any he’s probably okay. So what happened that you now all the sudden date older guys?”

  “Well, I wasn’t going to … Remember I told you that I shot him down at first?”

  “Yeah.”

  “But after he saved my life I feel like I owed him something.”

  “For sure, I could see that. So what did the police say?”

  “I, uh, I never went”

  “Anna! Are you serious?”

  “Yeah, I didn’t want all the stress; I had almost just been raped, you know!”

  “You should tell them. What if that guy is going to rape someone else?” Brian pleaded over the phone.

  “Yeah, but I don’t want to sit for all the questions, you know? Like, I just don’t want to deal with it.

  “Yeah, but maybe you’re the one who puts him away.”

  “I know,” I said in this fake shameful voice I do.

  “Ann, you really should go to the cops.”

  “I know I know. All right I’ll call them”

  “Ann—”

  “I said I’ll call!” I screamed into the phone.

  “All right.” There was a moment of silence. “ So, anyway.”

  “Yeah?” I said, still kinda angry at Brain. I mean, who was he? He’s not the one whose almost got raped, he’s not the one that the police are going to put in a dark room and question. He’s all high and mighty on his horse but that’s only because he’s just a spectator.

  “Did you sleep with him yet?”

  “No, not yet, we’ve only been out twice.”

  “You seem to like him so much.”

  “Yeah, but I don’t want to fall into the second date trap.” My tone began to soften.

  “The second date trap?”

  “Yeah, you’ve never heard of that?”

  “Nope.”

  “I read it in Cosmo.”

  “That would be why I don’t know about it.”

  “Yeah, yeah, okay, so guys don’t respect you if you sleep with them on the first or second date,” I explained.

  “I would totally argue that statement, but go ahead.”

  “So the first date just makes you’re a whore. I mean, who sleeps with someone that they don’t even know? I don’t do that anymore and you know about my sense for people. I can usually tell right away if someone is going to be good for me or not.”

  “Right.”

  “So the first date makes you a whore and the second date makes you seem easy. Like maybe he went out with you once and would do it again just to see if he can get into your pants.”

  “Into my pants?” Brian joked.

  “Shut up, you know what I mean. So, he might not think you’re a whore, but he’s not going to respect you because he can get you too easily. But if he takes you out for a third time then he really likes you.”

  “Is that so?”

  “Yes.”

  “So what about a fourth date?”

  “Well at a fourth date you run the risk of him getting bored and assuming that since you haven’t put out yet, you’re not going to.”

  “God, it’s so complicated being a girl.” Brian laughed into the phone.

  “I know, right!”

  “So does he know about this three date rule?”

  “No, of course not. Guys don’t know about this stuff.”

  “You sure?”

  “Yeah, he doesn’t strike me as the Cosmo type.”

  “You never know,” Brian jabbed then quickly continued, “So how are you gonna plan it?”

  “Well, he planned the last two dates so I told him today that I want to cook him dinner for our next date. So I’m going to have him come over, and I’m going to make something and were going to watch a movie.”

  “And then the popcorn,” Brian said suggestively.

  “Haha. Yeah, that’s right.”

  “Okay, so back to the third date rule.”

  “Okay.”

  “Okay, so what if its someone you know?” he asked.

  “Oh, if it’s someone you know ahead of time?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Well, then all bets are off. Because then you already have a relationship.”

  “So like for two people who have been friends for a while, it’s okay to fuck on the first date?” Brian asked.

  “Of course, like if two people knew each other like we do but were actually into each other, then they might as well skip dinner.”

  I laughed.

  “Well, then you wanna come over?”

  I laughed. “You’re so silly.”

  “Yeah …”

  Chapter 29

  Over the course of the next two months, Jace became an expert in holistic cancer care. It was all that he could do. For a man who identified with his own resourcefulness and strength, he was without power and without a move to make in this situation.

  So he became the warden of her health. It was never discussed but was almost viewed as his condition of her keeping the baby and forgoing any medical treatment. Every day Maddy would consume a medley of fresh fruits and vegetables. But only after she had done her daily yoga workouts. Yoga as well as the breathing treatments she had undergone were important to increase oxygenation of her cells. Cancer cells thrive in oxygen poor environments.

  She continued working through the pregnancy and was insistent that she only take time off after the baby was born, but that goal turned upside down when the diagnosis came through, and she agreed to take a leave of absence until things calmed down. Brent was very understanding of her decision as she knew he would be and asked that she come back afterward.

  It was the only decision for her as far as Jace was concerned. He had read that stress elevates the growth of cancer cells and time off would give her time to rest, relax, and focus solely on the good things in her life. He read that a positive mind set and stress-free environment were the best thing for someone in her position.

  Due to the dietary and lifestyle changes of pregnancy, it was actually one of the least likely times to develop cancer. Maddy was already eating healthy and had already cut out her coffee habit all together which was helpful to keep an alkaline cell. Coffee causes an acidic cell environment.

  Jace was dicing fruit on the cutting board when it occurred to him, that if those really were factors, then the cancer shouldn’t have grown at all during her pregnancy. But he quickly shook this thought off. If it was to work then they both had to remain positive and that was where she needed him the most.

  He sliced up the oranges as Maddy waited patiently at the breakfast bar. She was scrolling through something on her phone when she paused and thought for a moment.

  “Do you think we should have more pictures in the nursery?”

  “We certainly can. Whatcha thinking?”

  “I dunno some pictures of animals or something.”

  “Yeah, I’m cool with that.”

  “I’m thinking some birds or maybe some dolphins,” Maddy said, grinning to herself

  “Birds and dolphins? Babe, this is a man we’re raising. We need man things.”

  “Oh, yeah?”

  “Yeah! We need lions and monster trucks and stuff like that.”

  “If I let you decorate the nursery you’d have a transformer riding a raptor.”

  “Nah, raptors are too small,” Jace paused staring off for a moment. “But a T-Rex—Ooo! Or maybe that genetically modified Raptor that’s bigger than a T-Rex, we could do that!”

  “And that’s why you don’t get to design the nursery.”

  “Uh huh,�
�� Jace said, pushing the sliced oranges to the side.

  “Okay, how about some dog pictures?”

  “I like that, but you know what we should really start thinking about?”

  “I know, I know, getting a dog.”

  “Yes! It will be great for him to grow up with a big slobbery puppy.”

  “Why not something nice and small?”

  “A dog isn’t a dog if it’s under fifty pounds.”

  “How so?”

  “Because, dear,” Jace said, bringing a plate of sliced fruit over to Maddy, “whenever a housecat can kill a dog, it’s not a dog, it’s a gerbil.”

  Maddy laughed.

  “Yeah, but how will the building feel about us having a big slobbery puppy?”

  “They probably wouldn’t like it. Maybe that’s another reason to move back to Jersey?”

  “Yeah, I know.”

  “My real estate guys told me about this house in Oradell that seems really nice.”

  “Oh, yeah?”

  “Yeah, we’d be twenty minutes or so from your dad. Only a half hour or so from my parents.”

  “I know,” Maddy said reluctantly.

  “It will make babysitting a lot easier.”

  “Yeah, I just don’t want to let go of the city life, I suppose.”

  “I know, babe. We don’t have to sell this place. We can hang on to it for a while.”

  “Yeah, but …” Maddy stopped speaking and stood up grabbing her stomach. A look of panic engulfed her face. Jace dropped the knife and ran over to her side.

  “Whats wrong?”

  “I don’t … I don’t know.”

  “Is it the baby?”

  Maddy stood up and Jace grabbed her hand. She clutched onto his shirt then fell to the floor.

  “Maddy!” Jace cried out. “Maddy!” Jace yelled again.

  He looked down and noticed a pool of blood coming from between her legs.

  Jace leaped to his feet and grabbed his phone. He punched 911 into the phone and called in a panic.

  About an hour later, Jace paced back and forth in the waiting room. He wanted to sit, but there was no rest to be had. He felt like an anxious kid waiting for his parents to come out of the principal’s office. The feeling of dread that he always experienced in a doctor’s office was somehow abated by the overwhelming wave of anxiety flushing through his senses. He stood in the corner tapping his fingers together. Doing anything to keep his mind off the wait and off what would be the inevitable conclusion to the trip. Jace hung on the words of positivity as a sinner does the rosary.

 

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