“Yeah. He’s on a quest to find a woman that will love him in ways that his wife never will. I was dumb enough to believe that I was the only woman he had gone to bed with during that search.”
Neal touched her face. “Hey, don’t beat yourself up over this. Gabe is attractive and charming and he is a good father, even if he’s not home as much as he should be and for some reasons claims that his children aren’t his by blood. Everyone has their own search for love. But sometimes it gets twisted. Gabe’s search is twisted. He has his own reasons for not divorcing Leslie I’m sure. Some of what he’s told you in that regard is probably true. But their marriage is not just dysfunctional because of Leslie.”
“I know. But when you only hear one side of the story, it’s easy to believe that that’s the way it is. I know it’s wrong, but I really thought that I loved him and that we were going to get married and raise my baby together. I was looking forward to be a stepmother too, because Leslie doesn’t sound like a very good mother. Of course I don’t know her, but I have a feeling that a lot of what he says about the way she treats their children is true.”
“I’ve never seen her with their kids. I’ve seen them with Gabe and who knows how many nannies, but never her. The one time I talked to Leslie, she was covering a shift at the bar. She told me that she wanted to take me in the bathroom, give me a blow job and then screw me silly.”
“Wow. What an introduction to your boss’s wife.”
Neal chuckled. “You would make a wonderful stepmother and you’ll be a wonderful mother. I wished so many times that I had had a child with a good woman instead of a selfish conniving bitch, but I can’t change the biological mother of my child. And Ash wouldn’t be Ash without Tress as her mother. We may not always adore the people that we create children with, but that doesn’t mean that we should love our children any less.”
“I know. Fuller still hasn’t called me. I don’t know if he’s even still in town.”
“Your baby will be loved no matter whether he ever gets his head on straight or not. I would be honored to be a part of your child’s life Robyn. Do you know for sure that it’s going to be a girl or are you just hoping?”
“I have pictures from the ultrasound. There’s no visible penis, but I guess that doesn’t necessarily mean anything. I have a feeling that she’s a girl though. Do you want to see?”
Neal smiled. “I’d love to.”
Robyn dug the pictures out of her nightstand and handed them to Neal. He smiled. “A beautiful baby no matter what the sex.”
Robyn put the pictures away. “Thank you. I feel really lonely when I have to go to the doctor by myself. But Fuller doesn’t want to be there and of course Gabe can’t be there.”
“I’d love to go with you if you wanted me to.”
“Thank you. I’d like that. Now how about we get back to where we were before?”
Neal grinned. “Oh yes.”
They undressed and kissed and touched until they’d had their fill of foreplay. Though the missionary position was still comfortable for her as she’d told Neal the night before, Robyn had looked at sexual positions online that were comfortable for women later in their pregnancies and they tried one.
They both found it very enjoyable. They showered together and then Neal made them breakfast. He returned to his apartment to change his clothes, but returned soon after. They spent the day until she had to go to work together.
Robyn very much enjoyed her time with Neal and was sad to say goodbye to him, though the kiss he gave her made her look forward to many more goodbye kisses from him. They made plans to get together after she got off of work.
Robyn felt a little like she was walking on air when she walked into the bar. Kasia gave her an amused smile and said “You look like you got laid by a man that will be yours in a way that a married man never can. Did baby daddy come to his senses or did you hook up with a random hottie?”
“Kasia can we talk if business dies down later?”
“You okay hon? I was just teasing you, but you do look happier than you have in a while. Not that you’re not cheerful and don’t look happy, but there’s always something underneath it.”
“Yeah. It’s kind of hard to explain.”
“A lot of stuff might seem like it, but I’m far from the girl next door Robyn. There’s nothing that you can tell me that will make me think of you differently. I’ve probably done it or thought about doing it. We can talk about whatever you want.”
Robyn smiled. “Thank you.”
Business was busy until almost ten o’clock. Then the weather started to get bad again, so it slowed down a lot. There were two guys sharing a pitcher of beer at one end of the bar and a couple making out in the back booth, but other than that Gabe’s Place was empty of anyone besides the two pretty women behind the bar.
Kasia gestured for Robyn to sit down. “Sit. You don’t look pregnant, but I’ve worked all the way through two of my pregnancies and know that it sucks being on your feet. So Robyn, what do you want to talk about?”
“Um, I don’t mean any offense when I ask this Kasia, but are you sleeping with Gabe, or have you in the past?”
Kasia laughed. “I am not sleeping with Gabe right now, but that man is so hard to get rid of. He doesn’t just want in your pants, he wants in your head. I’m marrying my oldest son’s father in a month and a half. I know that I’m probably not the woman that he deserves, and I may never love him the way he wants me too, but he is so good to me and he loves all of my kids and I don’t mind sharing his bed. It’s more about comfort for me, but my kids need a good father and I need to settle the hell down and stop playing revolving door with my daughter’s dad. I don’t have any idea who my younger son’s dad is. That disgusts me, but he has always had a man that was willing to be his father.”
“Congratulations. Are you quitting?”
“Oh yeah. I will not be sad to kiss this place goodbye. Way too many bad memories. I did mess around with Gabe for a long time, but I haven’t for almost six weeks now. When I met him, I was fooled too. I’d heard the rumors that he beds every female bartender he hires, that he hires the women he does on purpose because he plans on screwing them. I heard that he stalks some girls and pays places around town to pass along the info to pretty girls that Gabe’s Place is always hiring, even if you have a less than perfect work history or background. But I looked at this gorgeous charming man and I was taken in. I’d seen him around town with his kids. Never his wife, just him or some nanny. He looks like such a wonderful father and Leslie is a bitch. I’ve talked to her once. She came on to me hard and when I turned her down she said some dirty, low down shit to me. Gabe promised me he’d help me with whatever I needed when he hired me. I was trying to take less from Buster’s dad so I let him buy me a car, because having three kids, I really needed one. He pays for my health insurance and my daughter’s and my younger son’s. Before he ever put a move on me, he gave me the sob story of how terrible to him Leslie is. I don’t doubt it, but in this day and age the remedy for that is divorce. He told me that one of the reasons he’s afraid to divorce her is because his kids aren’t his. I think he thinks that it’s easier for women to swallow because their kids have dark hair and Leslie has that bright flaming red hair. But it comes from a bottle of dye. I know a woman who works at the hair dresser that she goes to, and every time that brown hair starts to pop up, Leslie is right back in there, getting it erased again. I’m pretty sure her vivid green eyes come from contacts, but I think they just enhance what’s already there. Her eyes might be a less noticeable green, or maybe even hazel. Both of those kids are Gabe’s by blood. She was not pregnant when he met her. She got pregnant a couple days after they met and it freaked him out. He took off on her for months and then went crawling back to her and proposed. You’ve been sleeping with Gabe haven’t you Robyn? I’ll bet he told you what a piece of shit Fuller was for taking off on you when you were pregnant. Pretty damned hypocritical when he did the same thing to Leslie
.”
“I have been sleeping with him. I thought that a lot of what he told me didn’t make sense, but I wanted so badly to believe him. I was so sure that he would divorce her and we’d get married and raise my baby together.”
“Sweetheart, kids need fathers. I am not one of those women that think that mothers are superior to fathers because they carry a child for nine months. Maybe sometimes mothering comes more naturally to some women than fathering does to some men. It’s something to carry a child in your womb and to nurse them at your breast. It’s a feeling like no other. That does not mean that mothers are more needed in our society or any society than fathers. But just because your baby’s daddy is an ass and skipped out on you does not mean that you need to find a replacement. You will be enough when you have to be enough. I am lucky enough that I had my oldest child with an amazing man that loves me no matter what and never tried to skip out on anything, even though he was married when I got pregnant. My daughter’s dad is a complete ass. My youngest son was born from my selfish yearning to have another child. He might be Mitchell’s too. He never wanted to have his blood tested because he always said that he would be Greyson’s father no matter what and with any luck he is. He looks like his brother but it could come from me. I slept with so many men when I was trying to get pregnant that the idea of what I did makes me want to throw up. I’m kinda slutty and I love sex and have been known to enjoy a good threesome, but when I wanted a baby, I should have stuck with sleeping with Mitchell. He’s great in bed and he’s such a wonderful father. He is so good that he watched Buster and Sheryl while I was out whoring around sometimes. Some people think that Mitchell is pathetic because they look at our relationship and think that I’ve been walking all over him for years. I never wanted to do that though. I know he loves me, I just didn’t feel the same way. I was dumb enough to think that when I started messing around with Gabe that maybe I could love him.”
“I thought that I loved him too. Now I’m not so sure. When Fuller walked out on me, I told myself that I would not look for a replacement father. But Gabe was so kind to me and he never made a move on me. I seduced him and then we were swept up this in affair and he was promising me that he’d divorce Leslie. I was a fool and now I have to figure out how to end it with him.”
“You’re gonna be a good mother Robyn. If I can be a good mother with all of the messed up shit in my head and what I’ve done, I know you can be a good mother. It surprises me that he let you make the first move. Then again, I have a feeling that you feel really strongly about your morals. Gabe buys women things so that they’ll feel obligated to him, so that they will do anything he tells them to. He’s addicted to sex and from what I understand has slept with as many as three female bartenders at once. Has he ever asked you to do it some place weird in the bar like on top of the bar or in the bathroom?”
“No. We had sex the first time on the back booth, but after that it’s always been at my apartment.”
“You know what? I think Gabe might actually respect you Robyn. Leslie has fucked with his head so much that he looks at women differently now. He looks at them as less than him, things to be used while at the same time, searching for that one elusive woman that will finally love him. Except he’s not going to leave her even if he does find that woman. I never told him I loved him, because I didn’t. I was sure that I could, but I never did. I let him use my body for months because he’s good in bed. But there are a few even more messed up things about our relationship. The first time we had sex, Mitchell had all three of my kids and I was depressed. I was still working with Eric and I let him leave early, told him I’d finish up the cleanup myself. I did finish the cleanup myself, but then I got trashed. It was a Saturday night and I figured I’d lie down on the back booth until I was sober enough to drive home. I fell asleep and I woke up naked and with Gabe going down on me.”
“You’re kidding me. That’s like a form of rape.”
“Yeah, but he’s really good at it and I was horny so I let him make me come. He looked so cocky when he’d finished that I wanted to smack him. He told me he’d always wanted me and that he knew that I was waiting for him. He ran down this whole line of bull about his marriage and his kids and how I was going to be the woman that was going to save him from all of that. He told me that he was going to be a real father for my kids and that he knew I would be a wonderful stepmother to his kids. He offered me the manager job at his restaurant, said he’d set me right up and pay me some ridiculous amount of money. But I never wanted that. Not even the first time we had sex. Okay, here’s where it gets even more fucked up. We always used a rubber, but when I was heavy into messing around with Gabe, besides that one time I was with Eric, I wasn’t with other men. Well, besides Isley and I used to be at the point that there was no man I’d give up sleeping with Isley for. He’s Sheryl’s dad in case you hadn’t guessed. I got pregnant. I told Gabe and that fuck smiled and told me that he knew because he had poked a hole in every condom he’d ever used with me, that he had been doing it with women for years and had done it with his wife.”
“He poked a hole in the condoms and bragged about it?”
“Yeah. Have you heard about Brandy? He told me about her because it’s all around town that he snorted a line of coke with her because this guy that used to work for him walked in on it. But he is supposed to have done the same thing to her and who knows how many other girls that have worked here. He does it to trap the women that he’s with. He thinks that if he gets them pregnant they won’t leave him. That they’ll want a father for their children so bad that they’ll be content to be his mistress forever and let him do whatever he wants to them sexually. But I wasn’t going to put up with that bullshit. I may not have cared who the father of Greyson was and I regret that, but I could not have Gabe’s child. I stole money from him and got an abortion. Abortion has never sat well in my head, but I knew that I couldn’t look at Gabe’s child and feel the right way about him or her. Adoption was an option yes, but I couldn’t carry Gabe’s child either. I told him and he hit me. I was pissed and I hit him back. I almost quit and I took more help from Mitchell after that, but I was dumb enough to keep working here. I started sleeping with him again for a while because I looked at myself still sleeping with Isley and letting Mitchell take care of me and I felt like a dumb, pathetic bitch. But when Mitchell proposed to me again six weeks ago, I decided to say yes and I told Gabe that I was quitting and that if he didn’t stay the hell away from me, that I would tell Mitchell that he hit me. Mitchell is not a violent man, but when it comes to me and the kids, he is very protective.”
“Wow. I’m so sorry Kasia.”
“I got myself into the mess honey. I was dumb enough to remain in it. I got out and when I walk away from this place, I will never look back. I will be happy and my children will be well taken care of, and maybe I will grow to love Mitchell. You need to break it off with him right now. I don’t care if the guy you were with last night was supposed to be a one night fuck, or if he’s the love of your life. If he’ll stand by you and put up with Gabe’s phone calls and stalking and his gifts after you tell him that it’s over, he is a man of honor. If he won’t, then I hope you have a good support system. I’ll stand by you while I’m still here. You need company, call me. I’ll have to bring my kids but you should probably get used to having crazy kids around. Eric will never have your back unless he’s in your panties, so don’t bother to mention anything to him. I still think that Neal has a thing for you, but even if he doesn’t he will have your back regardless. You’re not alone Robyn. I know that I probably scared the shit out of you telling you that he’s going to stalk you after you break it off with him, but it’s true. You screw him and you tell him you can’t do it again, he’ll stalk you until the guy that you’re with fucks up, or until you get so horny that you’ll screw him. You mess around with him and you break it off with him before he’s ready to let go, he’ll stalk you. Expect him to sit outside your place. Expect flowers and romant
ic but dirty love letters, phone calls and texts at all hours of the night.”
Robyn sighed. “How does he get away with that?”
“He’s got money. We are women that work for him, some of whom are ex junkies or who were homeless or next to homeless when they walked in here. You seemed better off than a lot of girls. I know I was other than the fact that I had three kids with maybe three different fathers and still slept with my daughter’s dad. I never did drugs. I drink too much sometimes, but I take care of my kids.”
“I never did drugs either besides smoking a little pot here and there. I was next to homeless after Fuller left me, but I probably could have borrowed money from my parents again. The other job prospects weren’t good though. And my car was broken down. I owed my parents almost $600. My phone was shut off and I had nothing for the baby. I walked in here, he hired me and he paid for my car, he got me health insurance, he bought me so much stuff for the baby. He gave me $2200 the day he hired me. He pays me two to three times as much as he should sometimes. He seems so perfect besides the fact that he’s married.”
Kasia laughed. “Oh, and the fact that he lies and tricks women into getting pregnant with his child. When I slept with him the last few times, I bought the condoms from the machine in the bathroom myself and didn’t let him touch them.”
“So you really think he’s going to stalk me?”
Misty Reigenborn Romance Boxed Set Page 68