“Mia bella, this isn't the end of the world.” He was trying to be gentle. I didn't appreciate any of it.
“It feels like it. Leave me alone.” I turned away from him and looked out to the sea.
“Emma, don't push me away now. You need me.” His concern was like waves of nausea hitting me.
“Go away.” I set my head on my knees and ignored him.
It took him a minute to decide to leave me out there by myself, but he realized that I needed a moment. He left without a word. I knew that because I could feel his consciousness move away from me. I sighed once I knew he had moved.
Tears slid down my face. This isn't how I wanted things to be. I realized that when I wanted a different life when I lived in my small town, it was nothing like this. I sat and thought of my time there. I remembered how it all changed once Mike came into my life- well Mike and my birthday. With disgust I realized my birthday was coming up, and that I would be wed on Mike's birthday. I felt frustrated with myself. I knew in my heart that I was doing the right thing by marrying Dominic, but I also saw that I would always love Mike. He was and is a part of me. I couldn't just walk away from a lifetime of having him with me- even if it was in my dreams. My tears came out in sobs for what I was losing. I was suddenly determined to see Mike before my entire life changed. I would get my life back in order here, have my wedding stuff taken care of, and then I would make a trip to Ireland. Once I had a plan I felt a little more under control. I took a deep calming breath and let myself slip into mediation.
Dom came out a little later holding a plate of pizza and a root beer. I smiled at him. I was thankful for him in my life.
“Hey, you feeling any better?” His words felt like he was testing the water.
“I'm okay. Thanks.” He handed me the pizza.
“I was worried about you. I thought about calling your grandpa, but I figured I would wait a little longer to see if you had collected yourself enough to talk to me.” He shrugged.
“I'm better. I need to talk to you.” I blew out a breath and took a sip of the root beer- it was my favorite Barqs.
“What's going on, my love?” He was worried again.
“A lot. But I guess that is not a very good answer. And I know if you said it I would want to throw you into the ocean. So let me try to explain. I'm missing my old life. I never thought that this sort of thing would be my life. I miss Kelly, and I hate that I can't tell her everything. I miss Mike- even if it upsets you. He was part of my life from the moment you left until I came here. That is a lot of time for me to just let go. It feels like there's a hole in my heart where he belongs. I'm stressed out about the wedding, and all this chaos of trying to stick to the month thing. And I'm seriously feeling inadequate about the whole teaching thing.” I let out a long breath and tried not to look at him.
“Em, you just need to take a moment to breathe, cara mia. I understand the wedding stuff. I knew that would be the case when I told you. And I'm sure the idea of teaching is overwhelming, but I'm going to help you with that. I promise. I can't do anything about your old life. It hurts that Mike was such a big part of your life, but it's something that I know. And that I'll live with. Perhaps if you went to visit him, or had him come visit?” I could see it hurt Dom to suggest this.
“I was thinking that once things are settled here that maybe I could go visit him in Ireland.” The words were hard to get out, but I knew I needed to be honest with Dom.
“I understand completely. You are the only one that I knew my entire life. I knew we would be together, but it isn't something that you knew. And Mike was the person you dreamed of for so long. I think that the Kelly thing will naturally work itself out. I know how you felt when you had to spell her. But I've yet to find a loophole around it. There is no reason for her to know of our existence. If for some reason she becomes involved with one of our kind- something completely looked down upon- then she'll find out that way.” He shrugged.
“Ugh.” I knew he brought up Kelly to change the subject.
Dom let me eat in peace and then led me into the library. He had set up a series of drafts for lesson plans. I wasn't sure if they were for his classes or specifically for me, but the gesture was so nice that I almost started to cry again.
Thank you. I knew if I spoke I might actually cry.
For you, the moon. He walked me over to the various papers and sat me down.
“So here are the typical plans that I do for my classes. But I tried to create one for each of the classes that you would have to teach. I figured it was only healing and mental training, I doubt that Leland would ask you to do anything other than be civil.” He shook his head laughing.
“Yep, those are the only two that I know of.” I took a deep breath as I knew I would have to learn how to be nice to Leland again.
Dominic went through each of the various articles on the table. After he had talked to me about what I thought I might teach the students, he had a sea of new ideas for each class- although he had more for Daniel's class but since I was trained by Betty to do this stuff, I had a better grasp on it. Ultimately, it seemed like there would be an overlap of information between the two. I tried to think about how many of the students were in both classes, and I realized that I had no clue- only that Leland was in them. I sighed and tried to plan two different sets of beginning plans, just in case I had a significant overlap. I felt much better once I had an outline to at least go off of. When we were all done, I sat back and rolled my shoulders. I looked over at Dom and realized that there was still so much that I didn't know about him.
“Hey, so when are you going to start training me in your studies?” I was still fascinated by the idea of all the different places he had been.
“Hmm, well maybe Monday evening we can have our first lesson. That way I can think about where I should start with you. You are so special and unique, Emma. I really don't know how you don't see it, but I'm thankful to be the one at your side. You are amazing.” His face was alight as he said it.
I blushed a deep red.
“Don't blush over the truth, mia bella.” He took my hand and kissed it. I loved to feel his cool lips on the back of my hand.
I still felt extra lonely and didn't want to sleep alone. I just didn't know how to ask Dom if he would stay with me.
“Eh, Dom?” I was staring at the table.
“What is it, Em?” He looked up at me from stacking his papers together.
“I was wondering... if you would... um.. stay with me tonight.” The words were like cotton in my mouth.
“Of course. Would you like to stay in your room or mine?” His voice never changed, nor his body language- but his thoughts were excited about the idea of being in the same bed as me.
“Mine if you don't mind.” I looked up at him from under my lashes.
“Not a problem. Let me pack up everything and change and I'll meet you up there when you're ready.” His words were matter of fact.
“Kay.” I said as I left the room.
I headed straight to my room afterward. My nerves kicked up as I tried to clean up any of the mess that normally fell onto my floor. It wasn't like Dom had never seen it before, but it was the first time I had invited him into my bed. I knew it was significant, but I wasn't sure if I was ready for that move just yet. I dug through my clothes to find a middle ground for my pjs. My black satin bottoms and a black camisole would have to do. I was slowly becoming more of a mess than I thought I would've been if I had just gone to bed alone.
A gentle knock at my door sent my heart into fast forward. I tried to calm myself, but I realized it was useless. I opened the door and let Dom in.
“Which side do you like to sleep on?” I asked.
“Wherever you want me.” He smiled.
“Well, I normally sleep in the middle with pillows all around, so I'm not sure how this will work.” I realized I should've thought of this before.
“You just get comfortable and I'll find a spot for myself.” He led me o
ver to the bed and watched me get in.
I crawled into the middle and found my usual spot. My pillow was extra soft and my head squished right into it. I loved it. Once I stopped wiggling around, Dominic turned off the lights and slipped into the bed. He slept on his side on the left side of the bed.
“Are you comfortable enough?” I wasn't sure if I should scoot over or what.
“I'm fine.” He pulled me closer to him, and my heart leapt into my throat.
My head fell onto his chest. It felt so right. I suddenly felt more safe and comfortable than I ever had before in my life. I kissed his lips gently- once, twice, and a third time. I could feel his restraint as he gently kissed me back. A lust ripped through my body that I had never felt before. I knew just how far this could go, and I wasn't sure I was completely ready for that.
Don't worry, Emma. I'm not going to push you. His words were like a warm blanket on my cold worries.
I know. I pulled myself up until I was leaning on my elbow.
My hair fell in a curtain of blackness against his shoulder. I kissed him harder. His response was instant. My lips began to swell and control was starting to slip away from me. My heart rushed and my head filled with adrenaline. My body was trembling.
Are you okay? His voice was thick in my thoughts.
I shook my head, I knew that my voice would tremble.
My fangs slowly slid down and I was shocked.
It's natural. He showed me how he had done the same.
Okay. He could've told me that I had turned green and that it was natural and I wouldn't have questioned it. My lust for him and his blood was blinding- my control was shattering.
Yes, my love. Do it. His hands gripped my shoulders and helped to lower me to his neck.
I could smell the desire on his very skin. I licked it. My senses exploded with want. The salty taste was like the sweetest flavor my body had known. I kissed his shoulder, his neck, and then his collarbone again. His hands tightened on me, sensing my desire to bite him. I trailed my fangs lightly over his bared skin. Two faint lines of blood appeared. My mind exploded with the thought of tasting it. I kissed the wound gently. I kissed his swollen lips once more. His fangs nicked my bottom lip as he pulled it into his mouth. He sucked it ever so lightly. I swooned with the desire for him to bite me. I moved back to his little cut and slowly bit him.
The warm blood flowed into my mouth. Want consumed my every thought. I couldn't think of anything else. All I wanted was Dominic and his blood. He wrapped his arms around me- holding me to the spot, so even if I had the willpower to break away I couldn't. His body bucked against me, and I slid on top of him to straddle him. I pulled back and a soft moan escaped from his lips.
Bite me, Dominic. I sent the words to him through my haze.
He slowly moved my hair back from my neck and I felt his kisses trail from my mouth to the soft hollow of my throat. His fangs slightly nicked the spot and I felt the sting instantly. It was so different from the sting of a tattoo or a safety pin across the skin. It was a maddening feeling, one that drove a person to want even more. I pushed my neck against his mouth. His warm tongue reached out and licked the spot. Need ripped through my veins. I felt his teeth sink into my skin and I lost myself. My body reacted without thought, and soon I had bitten him again. Our bodies moved against each other, becoming slick with sweat.
He pulled back and looked me in the eyes. I felt like I was in some sort of trance.
Emma? My name was like a whisper on the wind.
I closed my eyes and tried to focus, but I wasn't used to so much blood being transferred in and out of my body. A slight moan escaped my mouth.
Emma, are you alright? He shook me slightly.
Uh-huh. It was like reaching for words in the fog.
“Emma, I need you to open your eyes and look at me, my love.” His words were ringed in worry. I didn't understand.
I struggled to do what he asked. It took considerable effort to get my eyelids up, but I managed partway. “What's wrong?”
“I think you're blood drunk.” He laughed.
“I'm not drunk.” But as soon as the words were out, I felt they were false.
“You've never consumed so much blood, or had any taken from you. I'm sorry. I think we need to stop for now.” He pulled me back and rolled me onto my back.
“Huh?” I was confused and felt slightly rejected. I pouted.
“Aw, mia bella. It isn't you. I want you to enjoy this, but I want you to remember it as well. If we continue you won't remember and you'll be very sick in the morning.” He kissed my forehead and moved the hair out of my face.
My heart sank, but I suddenly felt overcome by sleepiness.
“Kay.” I said as I snuggled up against him.
“That's my girl.” His voice was soothing and calm.
I slowly drifted off into a dark sleep.
When I woke up in the morning I felt worse than I had ever felt in my entire life. I vaguely remembered the night before, and how Dom had told me I would feel bad. I couldn't imagine feeling any worse. I rolled over, and my hand hit Dom's chest.
“Morning beautiful.” He smiled at me.
“Uh, I wouldn't say that.” I cringed as I moved.
“So I didn't stop soon enough. I'm sorry, my love.” His eyes were like shining emeralds.
“Ugh.” I threw the pillow over my head.
“I'd suggest that you stay in bed today.” He slowly got out of bed- his entire body seemed to glow.
“I think that is a good idea.” I mumbled under the pillow.
“You'll probably be nauseous if you get up, you should stay here as long as possible. I'll be back soon, my love.” He kissed my forehead lightly.
The mere thought of getting out of bed made me want to crawl under the bed and die. But my bladder didn't agree with me. I slowly moved out of my bed and my stomach dropped into my toes and churned violently. I lurched toward the bathroom- fumbling with the button on the wall to get it open. I barely made it to the toilet before I hurled everything up.
Once my stomach had calmed down enough for me to move, I washed my face, peed, and crawled back in bed. I went back to sleep within moments.
Dominic came in later with a glass of water and crackers. I didn't even want to think of putting something else in my stomach for fear that it might come back up. I sipped the water and waited a minute. I was okay. I bit into the cracker and my stomach rolled.
“Mia bella, I have a solution, but I'm not sure if you would want to.” He held my hand as I broke out in another round of sweating.
“Why wouldn't I want to stop feeling like this?” I was trying hard not to whine.
“The way you treat this is similar to a hangover. Just a small amount of blood will help it pass.” He gently brushed the hair from my face.
“Will it create a cycle?” I really didn't want to create a dependence on Dom's blood.
“No, mia bella. It will merely help you heal, especially after the amount of blood you've lost and thrown up.” He smiled as he made a small cut on his wrist.
The smell instantly had my stomach growling. A desire whipped through my body that physically shocked my system. I needed his blood, I craved it more than I had needed to breathe as a human. My fangs descended into my bottom lip. I knew I couldn't fight the need or want any longer. He placed his wrist to my lips and I latched on. The relief was instant. My head cleared and my body stopped shaking. Once I felt more like myself I was able to let go- even if it took great effort.
“Thank you.” I took his wrist and healed the wound.
“As I told you before, for you the moon.” He smiled again.
“Now we need to go eat dinner. Tomorrow you have your fitting.” He took my hand and helped me from the bed.
“No, we. We have our fitting.” I corrected him. I was reluctant to get out of the bed or to fill myself with food.
“You'll be fine.” I smiled at his words.
“I know.” I felt much better and
I knew that tonight as well as tomorrow would pass easily.
When we got to the kitchen, there was a small dinner set out for us. I knew that the bottle on the table was full of blood wine. I hoped that it wouldn't create more problems for me.
I ate slowly and made sure that everything was staying down as it went. The blood wine was the perfect balance for my shocked system. Leave it to Dominic to set up the perfect dinner for me after such a rough day. I smiled at him.
“We should go to bed early tonight.” He smiled back.
“I totally agree.” I still felt really drained.
“You should feel fine tomorrow. Your body is trying to replace the blood you lost last night. Just so you know, your sheets have been changed.” He sipped on his wine.
“Thank you. I hadn't even thought to change them.” It was so nice to have him with me.
“There was some staining last night. I think we will need to replace them. I'm sorry.” Dom's eyes held guilt.
“Oh, that's fine. I'm sure I have another set like them somewhere.” I smiled at him.
He laughed. “I love you, Emma.”
“I love you too, Dominic.” I felt full and tired.
“Let's go to bed.” He helped me back up the stairs and into my room. I pulled on a fresh pair of jammies and crawled into the bed.
“You can stay if you want.” I patted the bed next to me.
“I think I would like to.” He pulled off his shirt, jeans, and climbed in beside me in just his boxers.
“Goodnight, Dom.” I kissed his lips gently.
“Goodnight, mia bella.” He kissed me back softly.
His deeper breaths reached me before I fell into consciousness- he was asleep. It was nice to fall asleep next to him. I soon joined him in deep slumber.
Bella Vita Page 13