by Zoey Long
I let my hand brush over Madison’s bedspread. I reach for her pillow, inhale slightly. Lavender. Suddenly I hear the door open. Keys drop on the table in the foyer. I let go of her pillow, replace it on the bed and quickly get to my own room. I shut the door quietly behind me. Maybe I’ll find my balls in here.
The next morning I go for a run around the neighborhood. I need to clear my head. Get my shit together. Madison left the house early to go to work. I’m running shirtless and as I start to break a sweat, I am feeling more like my old self. I check out some toned hottie in shorts running past me. She winks and smiles. I’m catching the eye of every young woman I pass for blocks. Hell, even some of the old UES ladies. Whatever floats your boat. They’re all stealing long glances at my six-pack. Those hip lines women go totally crazy for. I’ve still got it. I start to head back. Now that I’m warmed up, maybe I’ll head to the studio and tussle.
I find myself on the block where Madison works. The ceramics store she works in is right around the corner from our building, I can’t help but pass it. There it is, Paint Me. I can’t believe people still go to those places. Who wants to spend the afternoon painting a bowl? I look in the window and what I see there suddenly stops me cold.
There she is. Madison. Standing in the middle of the store with her arms around some skinny blond guy. He’s trying to pull her closer; she’s laughing and moving away. Mr. Gentleman Caller from the previous evening, I assume. I’m careful to move out of their line of vision. Wait a minute. They’re both wearing green aprons and name tags. Son of a bitch. She works with this motherfucker? Ha. That explains it. That’s why she spends so much time working at this ridiculous store. I take a gulp of water and look him up and down.
He looks like a hipster. Is he wearing plaid in the middle of July? No way. He’s tall, but stringy. He’s probably a grungy asshole artist from Brooklyn. Gentleman Caller moves in and kisses Madison on the cheek. She pushes him away. Her look says: “Don’t do that at work.” Right. Have to follow the rules. I have an overwhelming urge to run in there right fucking now and punch him out cold. He’s a scrawny little fucker. Not much to him. He’d go down in one shot. Boom. One punch and it’s over. I know that much.
I shake my head. That’s a great idea. That’ll make Madison want to run directly into your arms and not look back, you idiot. Go in there right now and punch out her boyfriend in broad daylight with little kids around. Then introduce yourself as her lover. Or her brother. Then throw her on the back of your horse and ride off into the fucking sunset? Right. Great plan, Derrick. Get a grip. I need to get to the gym.
I walk the three blocks to the jiujitsu studio, get inside and pound some water. The contrast between the humid outdoors and the frigid interior of the gym shocks my system. I wipe down with a towel and pass by Ginger at the juice bar without stopping. She turns to talk to me, opens her mouth to speak, but I’m on a mission. This poor guy, whoever he is. He does not deserve the wrath I’m about to unleash upon him.
When I get on the mat, I crouch down. I’m poised and ready to go off like a handgun. The guy I’m fighting that day is pretty much matched with me in size and build. Good. I don’t want this to be too easy. I want to make this guy suffer. I won’t hold myself back at all. I’m here to grind this sucker’s sorry face into the mat until it sticks.
Once we start, I fly at him and pin him to the floor before he knows which end is up. He doesn’t like that I’ve pinned him this early. His face contorts and his biceps start to bulge in response. He’s trying to throw me off of him, get some leverage. There’s no way in hell I’m letting that happen. I pin his forearms, get a vise grip and hold him there. Now we wait. Tap out, motherfucker. You don’t want to mess with me today.
Chapter 5: Madison
“See you later,” Noel says as I turn to leave the shop.
“Sure,” I say quietly. He wants us to be dating. He wants to be my forever lover. He hasn’t said that, but I’m pretty sure that’s what he’d want if I offered it to him. Maybe not. I’m not sure. I’m not sure of much these days. I put my headphones in and head home.
I turn my key in the lock of the Bourse penthouse apartment. I hear the shower running and my heart skips. Derrick was asleep when I got home last night. Or out with some girl. The shower turns off and Derrick walks out of the bathroom and into the living room where I’m standing. He’s wearing a towel. Water rolls down the front of his abdomen and it’s all I can do not to fly at him right then and there.
“Hey,” he says, surprised to see me.
“H-hi,” I stutter. My face blushes hot.
“Please, Madison. You’ve seen me naked before.” He makes no effort to go to his room and get dressed. “So, how was your date last night?” he asks. “You weren’t home when I got in.”
“Oh, you went out last night too?” My stomach turns. Why does that bother me so much? We have no allegiance to one another. He doesn’t sound like he’s taunting me like usual. He sounds sad.
“I did.”
We both just stand there, staring at each other. Then I see the bruises.
“Are you hurt?” I walk over to Derrick, see that his arms are bruised. He looks like he has a scrape on his forearm, and he’s bleeding a little.
“Nah. This is…”
I touch his arm.
“Please don’t do that,” he blurts out. I jump back.
“Sorry,” I apologize, looking away from his gaze.
“I’m sorry, I just, I can’t have you touching me.” Derrick looks down at the floor. I’m unsure how to read him right now.
“What? What’s going on? Are you upset, Derrick?”
He stands and crosses his arms. Stares at me.
“Yes, I’m fucking upset. Fine. I’m upset. I just almost killed a guy in a fight.”
“Oh my God, you did what? Why?” I move to touch him again, try to see his bruises and cuts.
“Who the fuck is he, Madison? The guy you work with. Is he the guy you were with last night?”
Whoa. I’ve never seen Derrick exude an ounce of jealousy. How does he know who Noel is?
“What? What are you talking about?” I ask.
“I saw you with him today, when I was running. I understand that sounds accusatory but I don’t fucking like it. I wanted to punch him out. Run right in there and lay him out cold. Then I went to the gym and almost killed some random guy, all because of you. I know we’re not together, and just last night I was—”
“Fucking the shit out of some girl?” I finish his sentence for him.
“Yeah.”
“All because of me? I don’t control you, Derrick. You don’t control me. You have no right to order me around. You’re not my boyfriend. You’re my fucking brother. And even if you were my boyfriend, I don’t take well to controlling behavior like this. How many girls are you sleeping with? Noel is a sweet guy. He’s an artist like me. He paints. He drew my portrait. He’s—”
“Noel? That’s his fucking name?” Derrick laughs, smirking.
“Stop that,” I order him.
“I’m sorry,” Derrick apologizes.
“Thank you.” I nod.
Derrick starts to step close to me then, still in his towel. Our gazes are locked, and I can see the warmth and kindness in his eyes. Behind all his bravado, he really does care for me. I swear I can almost hear the electricity crackling between us. I open my mouth to speak but before I can say anything, Derrick’s mouth is on mine. We kiss uncontrollably, our mouths open. Tears fall down my cheeks. Derrick lifts me into the air and I wrap my legs around his waist.
“Goddamn you,” I whisper in his ear. “Goddamn you to hell.”
He carries me like that to my bed and throws me down onto it, his towel falling to the floor. He gets on top of me, his cock hard and slick between my thighs. I slip my panties off and he kisses my legs and upper thighs hotly, his mouth roving all over me.
“Madison,” he whispers breathlessly, coming
up to my neck.
“The thing is, you do control me. I can’t fucking stand it.”
I lift my arms up and he slides off my dress. He throws it across the room, and it lands in a heap on the floor. I’m naked with Derrick Bourse again and I’m so turned on my pussy is aching. I can feel my clit throb with want. I need his hands on me. I want him everywhere. I know once and for all that this is real. I want things to be real with Noel—he’s the guy I should want, but I don’t. I want Derrick. More than I’ve wanted any one person before in my whole life.
Derrick’s hands rove greedily over my breasts, pinching my nipples and making me gasp before he dives into my dripping wet pussy with his mouth. He licks the length of my pussy before taking me fully into his mouth. He explores me with his tongue, ravishing every inch of me. I don’t want him to stop, but I know this is wrong. He’s still my stepbrother. My mind races with thoughts of our parents coming home, how horrified they’ll be. How mortified I’ll be when they find out…what I’ll say to them. What am I supposed to tell them?
“Oh…mmm…Derrick. Yes, I can’t…this isn’t…damn you. We can’t…”
“We can,” he whispers. “And we are. Stop fighting this. I’m not going to stop until you beg me to, and you’ll beg me to stop only because you can’t come anymore.”
I moan loudly and throw my head back. Fine. I surrender. Decide to focus only on the two of us. There’s no one in the house. I can be as loud as I want. Derrick starts to roll his tongue in deliberate circles over my clit. It’s coming so fast that I can’t think about anything else. I bite my lip, dig my fingers into my pillow. My eyes are closed and my brow furrows as I allow myself to let go, to concentrate on my building orgasm. I know he isn’t going to stop going down on me until I come in his mouth. He’s as excited and turned on by my pleasure as I am, and I feel the same way about his. Our hands meet at my sides and our fingers gently entwine. He holds both of my hands as I rhythmically rock my hips up and down on his mouth.
He slides two stiff fingers into my sopping wet pussy and starts curving them against my G-spot, without any direction from me. I can feel myself clench around his fingers immediately as I keep rocking against him. How did he get this good? How does he know what will make my body crazy?
Is he comfortable like that? Can he breathe? Has he been doing it a long time? My orgasm builds further and I try to stop trying to figure it out.
“That’s so good,” I moan. “Are you okay? Are…”
He stops for a moment to look up at me and smile.
“Stop worrying so much, will you? I’m fine. More than fine.” He smiles again.
“Now shut up and come for me. Come on, baby. Give it to me.”
I lie back and close my eyes. I feel sexy and adored right now. I’m not worried if he’s comfortable. I’m not worried at all. I bite my lip and my orgasm crashes over my whole body in waves, I let it all go and come all over the bed, screaming so loud I’m sure my throat will be sore afterwards. He doesn’t stop pounding my clit with his tongue even as I’m coming. I sit up in pleasure before collapsing back down onto the white sheets, my chest and stomach covered in sweat. I’m still moaning as I lie there, trying to catch my breath.
Derrick kisses my thighs gently, removes his fingers from me.
“Now roll over,” he says.
I do as he tells me before getting up on all fours, exposed and ready for the taking. I want him inside of me even though I just came. My pussy is dripping wet, I want to feel him hot and hard thrusting inside me.
“I want it like this,” I say, looking over my shoulder.
Derrick feels for my opening with his fingers before bracing himself against me and entering me hard with his cock all at once. He knows how wet I am, knows I can take it. He pushes himself all the way into me, moaning loudly as he starts to thrust, gripping my hips.
“Fuck, yes. You’re so wet, you feel so good. I missed you, baby. Fuck, I missed you.”
I hold myself up, brace myself against the bed as he fucks me. I missed being with him like this too. So much.
“Yes, yes, please fuck me. Just like that. Yes, you’re so… yes. Yes.” My muscles start to feel like jelly but he keeps ramming into me. He slaps my ass with a loud crack. It stings slightly. There’s no one in the house to hear it, or us. I uninhibitedly thrust myself back onto his cock, fucking him back. He slaps my ass again, a little harder this time, on the other cheek. It stings more than the first one.
“You like that?” he moans.
“Yes,” I admit. “Yes.”
He keeps fucking me from behind and then slaps my ass again in the same spot as the first spank. I feel my flesh get pink and warm. The mixture of pleasure and pain mingling together excites me.
“And that?” he asks breathlessly.
“Yes. Do whatever you want to me,” I blurt out, dizzy with ecstasy.
He takes the opportunity and cracks me hard on the ass a third time, the sound ringing throughout the room. This time I am sure I’ll be left with a mark.
“Oh!” I yell in surprise, almost collapsing. He holds me steady, holds my hips up. He’s still inside me and the blow is still stinging after he’s done hitting me. My ass is warm and raw. I feel like the nerves all over my entire body are peaked with excitement. If he blew on me right now I feel like I might come again. Almost like he can tell what I’m thinking, Derrick reaches for my clit with his hand. My clit is warm and firm with excitement. He rubs me in small circles as he keeps fucking me, and the pain and heat of him spanking me mixed with such direct, intense pleasure sends me over the edge. I’m sweating and spasming on his cock.
“Yeah, baby. Yes.” He laughs. “That’s it.”
Derrick stops suddenly and rolls me over then. I know he’s about to come. Without thinking about it, I immediately take his hard cock deep in my throat. He lets out a guttural moan as he comes in my mouth, and I suck the come right out of him. His hips almost buckle with pleasure as I swallow down.
“Yessssssss,” he yells. “You’re so good.”
We collapse on the bed. The sheets are damp with our sweat and we both breathe heavily. We don’t speak for a moment, each staring at the ceiling. Finally, I look over at him, lying on his back, his chest rising and falling with labored breaths. He’s smiling.
“Holy. Shit,” Derrick says finally, laughing to himself.
“I know,” I respond. My chest heaves too, my breasts rising and falling. My nipples are still hard.
We’re both staring at the ceiling, almost afraid to look at each other. At least I am. I have no idea what I’ll do if I look at Derrick right now. Cry? Scream? Both? I feel like now that we’re done having sex, if we stop to look in each other’s eyes, some kind of spell will be broken. We have to face what we’ve just done, but I’m not ready yet.
Derrick rolls over on his side, facing me. I finally let myself look into his eyes.
“What are we supposed to do now?” I ask him, sincere.
“If you want to go again, that’s cool.” He smiles.
“Oh my God, I mean in the big picture sense! Don’t be obtuse.”
“Okay, I won’t be obtuse.” He tries to look sternly at me.
He’s enjoying this and I’m trying to be serious. Yet again. I give up.
“Seriously, Madison,” he starts. “Our parents don’t have to know about this. My dad hardly pays attention to what I do. He knows I fight and I go out with chicks. That’s all he knows about me.”
I reach for him, run my fingers through his hair.
“Do you want him to know more about you?”
Derrick turns on his back, looks at the ceiling. I think I’ve hit a sore spot. Could it be?
“Look, this isn’t about me and my relationship to Frank. He wasn’t around much, he’s always been distant and preoccupied, we never talk, blah blah blah. Whatever. What I mean is, they don’t need to know about this. They won’t even consider that it could be happening.
People often don’t see what’s going on right in front of them. And these two, believe me, they’ve got their minds on other things.”
“But…what do you even want out of this?” I ask him, before I have a chance to chicken out. I almost surprise myself when it comes out of my mouth.
Just then my phone trills loudly and vibrates against the wooden end table. I have little desire to answer it.
“You gonna get that?” Derrick asks me, completely ignoring my previous question.
I climb over Derrick. He stops me once I’m straddling him, tries to hold me there and leans up to kiss me.
“Hang on a minute. Stop that.” I smile.
I reach over him, grabbing for my phone. I look at the screen and my stomach flips. It’s my mother’s face flashing on the screen. Her contact photo is a picture I took of her on her last birthday. She’s posing at her favorite restaurant with a piece of chocolate cake and a lit birthday candle.
“Oh Jesus. It’s my mom.”
I jump off of Derrick like he’s on fire. He stifles a laugh into the crook of his elbow before rolling over to stand up, still naked. I wave him out of the room. I can’t sound normal on the phone with my mother when my stepbrother is standing fully naked in my bedroom.
“Hi, Mom,” I answer, trying desperately to sound normal, and certainly not like Derrick just plowed me like a cornfield.
“Hi, honey!” my mother says excitedly. “I can’t stay on long. I got a calling card. I miss you! How are things? We’ll be home in just a few short weeks, can you believe it? Is the summer flying by for you too? I’m having the best time here! You would go crazy in all of these museums, honey. The paintings are—well, you know all about what’s here. It’s amazing to see them all in person again, like when you were little. The Degas, the Monets, it’s all so incredible.”
Oh, good. I won’t have to talk much at all.
“Mm hmm,” I say.
I look up and see Derrick’s bare ass, tight and muscular just like the rest of him. He just picked his towel up off the floor and is heading out of the room. Good.