“I’m sorry you had to walk in on that,” he said, his eyes empty of any sign of an apology. Those golden brown eyes seemed devoid of something else, but I pressed on.
“Me too,” I said, curt and cold. I was trying to muster as much strength as I had inside me, curling up my fingers a little and feeling small fists start to take shape. It suddenly occurred to me, did he even remember me?
“Listen, Sky, I can’t make excuses or apologies. I know that the fuck we had in the bathroom,” so he did remember me, “was incredible. And honestly you’re one of the most-beautiful girls I have ever been with.” I could tell what he was doing in an instant. He wanted to butter me up, make sure that I had no inclination of going to the tabloids to sell his story.
“Dr. Ev- Blake, I don’t know if there’s an easy way to say this.” I stammered a little, feeling the strength begin to drain from me. There was no way he was expecting this news, I could tell in his relaxed demeanor, his nonchalant way about him. Sure, he seemed a little stressed about someone seeing him eating another girl out, but I was just another one of his conquests. He didn’t feel threatened by me. To him, I was just like that blonde being served up on a silver rhinoplasty platter.
He wasn’t accounting for a baby.
“What’s wrong?” He picked himself up a bit, his slumped shoulders rolling up and back, his head coming forward. It almost felt like he was consulting a patient. Oh no, no, no.
“I um… I’m pregnant.”
The air was sucked out of the room in one fell swoop, rushing out of whatever nook and cranny and crevice it could find. I could see the color in Blake’s face turn paper white, as the two words he wanted to least hear dropped in front of him with the force of a nuclear bomb. His shoulders slumped back down in something that looked dangerously close to defeat.
“How?” he asked, knowing damn well how. I decided I didn’t need to explain the biology of it all, so I just sat there, my hands cupped in my lap, the thumb twitching on the top of my left hand.
We sat there in silence for what seemed like hours. I could have sworn I saw the sun slowly start its descent in the window that framed Blake, his teeth clicking away as he chewed on the inside of his cheek. He was hunched forward this time, his fingers intertwined in a closed fist resting on top of a few patient folders.
“Do you know?”
“I’m keeping it.”
“What?” Was that shock in his tone? A flash of something behind those golden brown irises, I know I saw something.
“I mean, do you think you’re ready?” he asked, shifting in his seat just as much as he shifted his tone.
Which was quite a lot.
He must have realized the power that I now held. Suddenly, the comfortable floor underneath him turned into one riddled with eggshells. He had to tiptoe around me, make sure I didn’t blow up and cry to a news outlet. I knew myself though, and I knew I wasn’t going to reveal anything. I didn’t want any of that attention falling on me and I didn’t think it would cause any good, but something about the power was enticing. There was something almost intoxicating to see how Blake now had to play nice. I knew I was a big facilitator in the whole cheating thing, but now I wanted a little payback. I wanted to serve him a bit of revenge pie for his wife, for me, and for that dumb blonde bitch.
So I didn’t want to show all my cards just yet, I wanted to let him keep thinking I was a liability. Maybe he’d learn a lesson just the same way I had.
“Well, I’m not exactly sure,” I said, my hands now resting on the armrests of the wooden office chair he had sat for me at the front of his desk.
He withdrew for a moment before sitting back up in his seat, looking straight at me, and to me complete and total surprise, he smiled. A deep, genuine feeling smile that was meant to reassure. I was supposed to feel comforted by him, like he knew just what the roadmap was and where it lead.
“We’ll get through this.” I noticed his use of we’ll.
“You’re not alone in this ok? I’ll help you every step of the way.” He got up now, walking around his large desk and posting himself on the edge closest to me, his ankles crossing together. I noticed he wore some expensive looking dark jeans, tailored perfectly, instead of the usual scrub attire.
I looked down at the floor, down at the scuff marks on the floor. His presence almost felt imposing now.
“We just need to make sure that it stays a secret.” And there it was, his first defensive tactic. He wanted me to know that this was indeed a secret and that it indeed had to stay a secret. I wanted to jab back, but when I looked up, I couldn’t help but get slapped at the sheer reality of it all.
I literally just saw this guy on the cover of a tabloid talking about being reunited with some long-lost family member. He was as much a celebrity as any B-rated actor, cashing in on reality television show fame and whoring himself out through the talkshow circuit. And here he was, talking to me about his, our, baby.
What in the actual fuck.
I could feel myself getting emotional.
Sky. Calm yourself down. This isn’t the time.
“Have you been seen by a doctor yet?” he asked. I could tell he was injecting concern and compassion into everything he said now, like a thawed out twenty pound turkey getting basted. He was just making me all plump and juicy.
The scary part? I couldn’t tell if it was working or not.
I’m not sure if it was pregnancy brain, or if I could even get pregnancy brain that early, but hearing him talk somehow made me fall for the fantasy. For a fleeting moment, I pictured myself living a happy life with a sun-kissed little boy who liked building sandcastles and tasting the seawater, his father just off by the crashing waves with our daughter, her toes protesting at the freezing cold temperatures.
And then reality bitch slapped me hard once again.
He was a married celebrity doctor and I was a lost college student.
But wow, that fantasy felt so nice.
“Come on, let’s go take you to Dr. Gerrad, he’ll be able to confirm it and help us with the next steps. Plus he’s a very good friend of mine so I can trust him.” I clocked his use of the words next steps. I enjoyed doing that. Pointing out certain words in someone's speech and really honing in on them, dissecting them. It was a bad habit of mine, something that lead me to overthink quite a few things in my life, but for some reason, this dissection felt fully warranted. I looked up and met his heart-warming yet commanding gaze. There was no wonder why the camera loved him. Perfectly chiseled face, teeth that had no flaws, skin that was never even grazed by acne, and eyes that drew you in, just really sucked you into whatever he was saying.
“That sound’s like a good idea,” I said, struggling to break eye contact.
“Good, now… I hope you understand, but I can’t go with you, ” he said, that smile made for TV now curling down into an empathetic frown, the ones that puppies give whenever they peed on the wrong spot.
I nodded, understanding that at this point, neither of us wanted that attention. Maybe, and this was a big maybe, Blake was actually interested in raising his own kid, his first child. Then we would need to come out of this with the least amount of blood on either of our hands so that the public doesn’t stamp us with that scarlet letter.
No, no, no, Sky, you’re being absolutely ridiculous.
“I’ll call my assistant, he’ll make sure Dr. Gerrad sees you right away,” Blake said, closing it off to any further discussion as he pulled out his phone and in less than a minute, he was already snapping orders to his assistant. I noticed that his tone shifted a little. I could tell he was restraining something behind his short, curt commands and what almost seemed like a certain apathy towards his assistant.
“He’ll be here in about ten minutes,” he said, walking back behind his desk and sitting down in his almost throne-like chair. This time he wasn’t as rigid, leaning back as the news was becoming more palatable. It also probably helped that I wasn’t a screaming, crying mess asking f
or child support. Don’t get me wrong, that scenario did cross my mind. I’m only human. I thought that Blake would gladly pay to keep me quiet and happy, letting me live a life in peace.
But then I realized that I pretty much almost had that already. My parents have always been wealthy and they never held that away from their kids. I had no fears of finding myself without any money and I knew that I was too determined of a person to not have a stable career myself. So Blake’s wealth didn’t exactly attract me, but my baby hormones were drawing me into something.
“Do you want anything to drink?” he asked, nodding over to a cabinet that I assumed held a mini-fridge. I shook my head, the pleasantries oddly feeling safe. I wanted him to stick to this for now. We needed to keep talking about the weather or the latest sports game, something that wasn’t emotionally laced with fear and apprehension.
Something neutral.
“If you do decide to terminate, I’ll support you through that as well.”
And bamn, there was his deck of cards thrown straight out onto the table. That was the finish line he had run a mile for, feeding my ego more and more, lowering my defenses. Abortion was something I had considered, and truthfully, it wasn’t completely off the table just yet. But I looked at Blake and decided that no, this wasn’t going to be his decision. He was scum, having who knows how many mistresses. And yes, yes, I was one of them, but I felt like I had fallen down that waterfall already and come out alive, gasping for air, on the shore. Seeing his face buried in between that girl’s thighs snapped the illusion for me.
Now I just wanted him to feel scared.
“Thanks,” was all I said, dropping the subject like a smooth rock into a quiet lake, the ripples being sure to be felt for some time after. His suggestion was more than just a suggestion and we both knew that.
“I should wait outside,” I said, standing up and walking around to hug him. I realized how awkward that was midway there, but I decided to commit anyway. He stood up as he saw me approach and opened his arms, taking me in. A flash of the amazing fuck we shared in the bathroom stall came rocketing to the forefront of my vision, but it was just that.
A flash.
I could feel his arms around me grow looser as he readjusted a little, dropping them down to straddle my ass. I looked up at him and saw a new hunger in his eyes. He genuinely thought I was going to have sex with him.
I smiled a “fuck you” smile and pushed off his chest. Before I broke his hug, Blake decided it would be a good time to assault my mouth. His tongue pried through my lips and met mine, battling. I pressed off harder and broke the kiss.
“I’m sorry, I’m not ready,” I said, truthfully. I also was not feeling Blake at all. Yes, he was swoon worthy, but he was literally eating someone’s pussy.
Oh no, and he just kissed me.
I suppressed a gag and walked to the door, becoming more and more disgusted as I thought about it. Did he really expect that I was going have sex with him after I just finished walking in on him going down on another girl? This was just too much.
“I’ll wait outside.” I didn’t even stay for a goodbye, I walked out and closed the door behind me. I didn’t realize just how nervous this made Blake, who probably thought that the angrier I got, the louder I could become.
The more riskier I got.
I didn’t realize how much Blake disliked risks.
CHAPTER FOUR
I SAT IN A DARK blue plastic chair for about another five minutes before I decided to get up and stretch, allowing the blood to flow back into my butt which was already going numb with sleep. I let out a loud, almost soul-shaking yawn, and was surprised to hear a similar one close behind me.
I turned and saw Blake’s assistant for the first time. My jaw fell open just a little.
That wasn’t an exaggeration, my lips were actually separated and my breath was actually being stolen. There, walking towards me and stretching off his own yawn, was the perfect type of man, one reserved for the finest of fantasies. The kind of guy that I would set as my computer background, the model type that deserves every single gig under the sun. I would fantasize about his type when I was faithful to my previous, more... bookish boyfriends. He had dark black hair that was hastily tousled around along with breathtakingly deep blue eyes, perfectly framed jaw, a walk that emitted pure confidence, and a full tattooed sleeve on his left arm, vibrant in colors and framed by shadows and grays in the perfect spots.
This guy was dangerous.
“Hi, I’m Alexander. Alexander Cruz,” he said it as though I should have known it, a little spanish accent coloring the ends of his sentence. A strong hand reached out as a smile appeared on his face, revealing the two cutest dimples that somehow made me even hotter.
I met his hand with mine, letting his fingers wrap around, feeling the calluses on his palm rub against my sensitive skin, left behind from lifting weights at the gym. “You must be Sky Silvers? Dr. Evans said he wanted someone to go and make sure Dr. Gerrard saw you today?”
“Yeah.” I nodded, still unable to construct full, cohesive sentences.
“Well… do you want to go?” An arm came out and pointed the way down the hall, expecting me to start walking. I willed my muscles to move and was able to get some sort of function back, stepping forward but letting Alexander take the lead. He was wearing a simple black t-shirt that hugged his muscles perfectly. Even from underneath the fabric, I could see the slender ripples of a very defined body.
“Assistant, huh?” I asked, wondering why he wasn’t eating grapes off of a naked goddess right now.
“Yeah, moved out here for my music and Blake was the first person to offer me a job after I threw my resume everywhere. Schedules rough, but I’m making it work.” We turned a corner and came up to the elevator just as it was closing. Alexander was able to swing a hand in between the slender opening and force the elevators to reopen. I watched him get in and hold the door open. I stepped inside and thanked him for risking a limb so that we wouldn’t miss our ride. He nodded it off, saying the elevators were weak enough as it is.
We stood next to each other as the elevator dinged its way up. The air felt electric in the small confines, making me fully aware of how close we were standing together and how manly he smelled, oak and woods, almost musky, but so damn hot. I could feel the air rush in as the elevator door dinged open, like a fresh splash of water snapping us out of our spell.
He held his arm out again and let me walk through the doors first.
“So, you a friend of Blake’s?” he asked innocently enough.
“I just went in for a consultation,” I said, unable to stop myself from lying. I just couldn’t bring myself to say it out loud, especially not to Alexander, who was quickly becoming one of the hottest guy I had ever laid my eyes on. A part of me didn’t want to ruin some sort of possibility, an inkling of hope that sparked between us. But the bigger part of me didn’t want news getting out. I wanted to be just as cautious about this as Blake.
Alexander was his assistant after all. I wasn’t sure just how close they were, and judging by the way Blake spoke to Alexander over the phone, I didn’t think they were that close. But still, information like this was powerful and I knew it could spread, so I needed to keep my lips sealed.
No matter how badly I wanted to trust those profoundly blue eyes.
“Well, whatever you’re thinking of doing, don’t do it.”
He looked me over as though he approved of me. I felt his eyes travel my body, taking me in, almost in admiration. I tilted my head and shrugged my shoulders, not really knowing how to react to this tattooed Adonis checking me out. My body was growing hotter and hotter by just being next to this guy.
“I don’t know about that, but thanks. Guess it’s from being called Frankenstein growing up.”
Also; I didn’t know how to flirt. Not well at least. Sometimes, on the days when my confidence was somehow peeking, I would hold my head up higher and my chest up along with it. Those were the days I could
hold my own, in fact, it was exactly on one of those days that I met Blake Evans.
But today wasn’t one of those days. It could have also been the effect of just how astonishingly gorgeous this man was. Or, it could have been the fact that I just had to witness the father of my child going to town on a blond girl like it was an all-you-can-eat buffet at Dennys.
Take your pick.
“I find it hard to believe a beautiful girl like you would ever be called Frankenstein.”
I couldn’t help but freak out a little bit inside. He just told me I was a beautiful girl, and the way he said it! It wasn’t like a passing phrase, something your grandmother would say because she was your grandmother and wanted you married already. No, this sounded strong, confident.
“You should have seen me with braces and a unibrow,” I said, once again, saying way more than I should have. He was turning me into a babbling brook of idiocracies, just one after another after another. To my relief, Alexander laughed, a gentle kind of laugh, like a friendly virus, infecting your system and drawing out the same reaction.
“Please tell me you have photos of yourself as a kid,” he said, as if he were ever actually going to see them even if I did have them and by chance remembered where they were (inside my third drawer in the dresser next to the closet).
“Can’t remember where I left those darn things.”
“Well, you should have seen me as a kid. I needed braces for pretty much my whole childhood.” His admission of a fault was somewhat endearing and made him even more attractive, throwing him up and over comfortable levels of hotness. The territory was getting murkier and murkier as time passed and we continued talking.
“Shit, I didn’t even realize we passed Dr. Gerrad’s office,” he said, raising his arm above his head and scratching innocently, like those unfathomably adorable cartoon monkeys that always aired on the weekend mornings.
Monitored (The White Coat Series Book 3) Page 3