by Jade Jones
“I appreciate it…with your fine ass.”
She smiled bashfully.
He slowly leaned in, and placed a peck on her small lips. She responded by trying to slide her tongue in his mouth, but he quickly pulled away. He wasn’t trying to do all that extra shit.
“Why don’t you suck it for me a little bit,” he offered.
A respectable chick would have asked him if he were crazy, slapped the hell out of him, and left the dressing room, but his nerdy admirer surprised him when she slid down onto her knees, pulled his thick dick out, and obliged his offer.
Marcus reclined his head, closed his eyes, and groaned softly as she went to work. Her looks were definitely deceiving because she seemingly sucked him off better than Karrine Steffan’s legendary head game.
Her head bobbed up and down in his lap as she made sloppy gagging sounds, and Marcus loved every minute of the shit. He placed his hand on the back of her head, and envisioned her soft lips as Cameron’s as she polished his dick. He could just imagine how wet and warm Cameron’s mouth would feel wrapped around his hard dick.
“Damn, that shit feels so good,” Marcus moaned. “Don’t stop…”
“Aye bruh, you up!” Xavier said busting inside the dressing room with his bare dick swinging for the world to see. He wasn’t surprised to find some random chick sucking Marcus off, because that was something the male dancers saw on the regular. “Fans” as they often referred to as their loyal customers, went hard for them. Plain and simple. It was just the way shit went.
Marcus’s female friend instantly jumped up at the sound of Xavier’s voice. She had gone from freaked out to ashamed in a matter of seconds. Quickly standing to her feet, she snatched her glasses off the countertop, and crookedly placed them on her face before scurrying out of the dressing room in embarrassment.
“Damn,” Xavier laughed shaking his head in amusement. “The hell was up with her? Anyway watch table four,” he warned his friend. “It’s a bunch of fat ass bitches that wanna grope all day, but ain’t got no money to pay.”
“Good looking,” Marcus said as he fixed up his clothing and prepared to make his way out into the club.
Pretty Willie’s “Lay Your Body Down” played on maximum as he made his way into the dimly lit crowded club. Colorful strobe lights reflected off his oily muscular chest, and the women were hollering and screaming like Lil’ Wayne had just stepped into the building.
In the farthest corner of the room, Marcus spotted a woman that he had dated periodically throughout his life. They had never been in a full blown relationship, but he did develop feelings for her over time and vice versa. She was a “get money” type of broad, and the chicks sitting at the table with her looked like they were too so he sensuously danced his way over towards her table.
Pure Seduction bit her bottom lip seductively as Marcus eased her chair closer to him and danced in front of her. “Is that dick still as good as I remember?” she boldly asked.
Marcus leaned down towards her ear and flicked his tongue over her earlobe. “It’s gotten even better,” he whispered.
2
After a grueling two hours of processing, Cameron was finally permitted inside the prison visitation room. Luckily Jude was in the general population so he was able to have contact visits. It was already hard enough for the couple to deal with Jude’s lengthy imprisonment, and not being able to have physical contact would crush them.
Cameron slowly ambled towards the table where Jude sat with his hands clasped together in front of him, and a half smile on his face. He wore a tan prison jumpsuit, and looked rather weary and stressed, but he tried to push his issues and worries to the back of his mind for the sake of seeing his woman.
Cameron’s smug expression didn’t hide the way she felt. She obviously had some things on her mind. Dressed in a vintage Vans sweater, loose fitting denim jeans, and a pair of black Jordans without an ounce of makeup on her face, Jude automatically knew something was up with his girl because she usually dressed up where ever she went. His eyes then wandered to the Rihanna inspired haircut she was now rocking.
The new haircut actually suited her quite well, but Jude would be lying if he said he didn’t love the shoulder length bob that Cameron was accustomed to wearing.
Jude quickly stood to his feet once Cameron reached his table. They embraced each other and Jude held on tighter as they hugged. He kissed her forehead, and then placed a brief kiss on her dry lips. Contact was limited, and the correctional officers were known for tripping on inmates if they got a little too touchy.
Cameron and Jude then took their seats across from one another. Jude noticed Cameron’s dry demeanor immediately. As a matter of fact, she wasn’t even looking at him. Instead she was eyeing an inmate visiting his wife and four year old son.
Jude decided to initiate the conversation. “I see you cut your hair,” he said.
Cameron slowly peeled her gaze away from the inmate to look at her man. Just as handsome and calm as the day he was when she met him for the first time in Columbus, she was just as attracted to him now as she was back then. It was just fucked up how unfortunate circumstances had gotten in the way of their once perfect relationship.
Cameron licked her dry lips, exhaled deeply, and looked down at her hands. “Cut it last night,” she said nonchalantly.
Jude nodded his head. He didn’t want to question her as to why she had cut her hair off and risk the chance of upsetting her; especially since it was clear that something was on her mind.
He ran a hand through his mid-length dreadlocks. “I been missin’ you,” he admitted in a low tone.
Cameron didn’t respond immediately and that actually hurt Jude a little. He reached over to touch her hand, but didn’t miss her instantly tense up. That hurt even more. “Bay, you aight?” he finally asked. “You know if you got some shit on ya mind, you can tell me.”
Cameron looked up into Jude’s beautiful brown eyes that were complemented by long, thick eyelashes. He was sexy as he wanted to be with his smooth light skin and handsome facial features. She loved his lips most of all. They weren’t too thick, but they weren’t too small, and they were soft as hell.
Damn, Cameron thought. She loved this man in front of her with every fiber of her being, but she was unsure if she was willing and/or able to hold him down in his time of need especially when she needed him as well.
“I have something to tell you,” Cameron whispered. She was barely audible, but luckily Jude heard her so she wouldn’t have to repeat herself.
“Baby, you can tell me anything,” Jude said. And he meant that…but accepting it was a whole other story. Every night he prayed that Cameron wouldn’t give up on him, because he needed her now more than ever.
Cameron swallowed the large lump that formed in her throat, and sighed dejectedly. Jude slowly reached over and placed his hands on top of Cameron’s. She didn’t tense up that time. As a matter of fact she relaxed a little.
“I took a pregnancy test last night,” she admitted in a low tone.
Jude’s breath felt like it had caught in his chest as he waited for her to finish.
“It came back positive…” Cameron looked up from their hands to see Jude’s expression.
His jaw muscle tensed, and he closed his eyes briefly as he allowed her words to sink in. Cameron took his gesture to mean that he was either upset or disappointed by the news.
“You look mad,” Cameron whispered.
Jude looked over at his woman intensely. “Babe…I’m not,” he paused. “I’m not upset. I’m not pissed. I’m just mad at myself,” he said in a calm tone. “I’m mad at the fact that I’m sittin’ my black ass in here, and I can’t be there for you like a man supposed to be for his woman.” He ran a hand through his dreadlocks and sighed in frustration. “It’s just…it’s fucked up man.” He shook his head. “I just…I don’t know what to do,” he whispered.
“You don’t have to do anything,” Cameron told him. “I’ll go to the clinic and make sur
e that I’m actually pregnant,” she said. “And if I am…I plan on getting an abortion...”
Now it was Jude’s turn to tense up. He quickly pulled his hands away from Cameron’s and stared at her in disbelief. He had to be sure that he was hearing her correctly because he truly couldn’t believe the shit coming out of her mouth.
“What’d you just say?” Jude asked in irritation. His cheeks instantly flushed in anger at the mere mention of abortion. “Yo, you’re not killin’ my fuckin’ baby if you’re pregnant—”
“You don’t have a say in what the fuck I do with my body,” Cameron said through gritted teeth.
Jude was taken aback by Cameron’s harsh response. He wasn’t used to hearing her speak this way. “You’re my woman,” Jude said. “And that’s my baby. I think that gives me more than enough say, don’t you think?”
“That doesn’t matter,” Cameron said as tears slowly formed in her eyes. “You’re in here. I’m the one that’s out there struggling to live without you. I’m in school…” She frowned and tears slowly slid down her reddened cheeks. “What the hell do you think?” Cameron asked. “I’ma be bringing the baby up here every other fucking week to see your ass? It’s enough trying to take care of myself,” she told Jude. “I’m not ready for any kids…”
Jude shook his head vehemently. “Cameron, God gave us this blessing a second time for a reason. I can’t even believe I’m hearin’ this shit right now,” he said. “The reckless ass way you talkin’. You sound selfish as fuck—”
“Selfish?!” Cameron spat. “I sound like I’m thinking about what’s best for both of us,” she said before wiping her tears away. “You’re in prison. We’re not financially stable.” Cameron reached over towards Jude’s hands. “Bay…we’re not ready…”
Jude moved his hands away from Cameron and continued to shake his head in disbelief. “You’re givin’ up on me,” he finally said.
Cameron was clearly offended by that statement. “What do you mean I’m giving up on you?” she asked. “I’m here aren’t I?”
“Yeah, but for how long?” Jude asked with a serious expression. “You’re already givin’ up on our unborn kid,” he said. “How long before you give up on ya man? Huh?” he asked.
Cameron stared deep into Jude’s eyes. She matched his intense stare with her own. “I don’t know…,” she said flatly.
Jude felt like he had just taken a fierce blow to the gut. Hearing her say that let him know that there was in fact a possibility of him losing her. “Cameron, don’t say that shit,” he pleaded shaking his head. “Don’t say that…”
More tears escaped from Cameron’s eyes. “You’re in here, Jude—”
“Cameron, you’re my woman. You’re supposed to be my fuckin’ rock.” His voice cracked as he spoke. Jude was overwhelmed with emotions. This was Cameron’s third visit since he had been imprisoned, and this visit was definitely proving to be the most intense. “I need you,” he told her. “I need you in my life, babe. And if you’re really pregnant…as selfish as you may think I’m being, I need that baby too,” he admitted. “I need you to get me through the days in this mothafucka, bay,” he told her. Tears slid down his cheeks as he spoke. “I need you just to sleep at night,” he whispered. “Cameron, you don’t know what the fuck I’m goin’ through in here. I need you so bad…I need you baby…Don’t talk to me like this. Please…” There was so much desperation and pain in Jude’s eyes that Cameron was unable to meet his gaze.
He reached over to touch her hands again, but she quickly pulled them away and placed them in her lap. “I can’t keep this baby Jude,” she said looking down.
“Cameron—”
“I can’t!” Cameron suddenly yelled. “I’m not ready for this shit! And I can’t do this shit by myself!”
Jude’s nostrils flared in anger as he searched Cameron’s face. He barely even recognized her and it had nothing to do with her attire and new haircut.
Cameron sniffled and wiped her nose with the sleeve of her sweater. “I have a little something for you,” she said before digging into the pocket of her jeans. She then pulled out a crinkled fifty dollar bill, placed it on the cold metal table, and slid it over towards Jude.
He frowned at the sight of the money not knowing what she had to do to get it. He prayed that she hadn’t resorted to stripping when she promised him that she was done with it for good.
“Man, I don’t want that shit,” Jude told her in a nasty tone. He hated that she was trying to use money to change the subject or better yet to pacify him.
Cameron was shocked and offended by his reaction. Without another word, she grabbed the bill shoved it into her pocket, and quickly stood to her feet.
“Cameron,” Jude said in a serious tone.
“I think this visit is done,” she said not bothering to look at him. “And so am I.”
Jude stood to his feet and placed his hands on the table. “So that’s what that lil’ punk ass money was about?” he asked. Cameron had never offered him any money since he had been locked up and he didn’t want her to. She knew that he was far too proud to accept anything from anyone. “Huh?” he asked. “I can’t fuckin’ believe you.” Jude’s tone was laced with pain and anger. “I’m not a perfect nigga. I know I’m not. And I admit I wasn’t real with you from the jump, but the love I got for you is. I went over and beyond to show you I’ma good dude, and now you turnin’ yo’ back on me?” he asked. “Cameron, look at me…”
Cameron forced herself to look at Jude as she blinked back tears.
“Please don’t tell me fallin’ in love with you a mistake,” Jude said in a low tone. “Please just tell me you’re scared right now…”
Cameron ran a hand over her short hair and sighed. She looked up at the ceiling, rolled her eyes, and tried to hold back the oncoming tears. “I just can’t do this right now Jude…I can’t—I just can’t.” Suddenly, Cameron turned on her heel and walked swiftly out of the visitation room.
“Cameron!” Jude called out after her. “Cameron!”
***
Cameron drew in a deep breath of fresh air the minute she reached the parking lot. She couldn’t stand the stale scent of the prison. She couldn’t stand the jumpsuits. She couldn’t stand the neediness in Jude’s eyes.
“Fuck,” she cursed as she quickly sped walked to her Audi q7. The vehicle Jude had purchased for her. His words echoed over and over again in Cameron’s mind: I went over and beyond to show you I’ma good dude, and now you turnin’ yo’ back on me?
Once Cameron reached her car, she pulled her keys out and stuck the car key into the keyhole….well actually she tried to several times, but with trembling fingers she missed the first several attempts until she got fed up, tossed the car keys, and slowly sank down onto the ground where she began to cry hysterically.
Cameron leaned against her truck and grabbed fistfuls of her short hair. “Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!” she screamed. She felt like shit about everything she had said, but unfortunately it was too late to take it back now.
3
Jude tried his best to remain strong as he made his way back to his 6x8 prison cell that he was forced to live in with another grown ass man. He felt like he was on the verge of breaking down, but the last thing Jude wanted was for his fellow inmates to see him at his weakest and possibly use it against him.
The heavy metal door to Jude’s prison cell opened, and he reluctantly stepped inside. Being in prison was worse than being in hell, and Jude wouldn’t wish this shit on his worst enemy. However, he firmly believed in the motto “If you do the crime, you must pay the time.” And he was damn sure paying for it…physically, mentally, emotionally…hell, even socially. Prison was built to make a sane man go crazy.
The metal door slammed shut behind Jude, and he slowly took a seat on the hard circular stool that was positioned in front of the stainless steel desk bolted to the wall. He looked totally out of it as he sat still with this faraway look in his dark eyes.
His
cellmate Larry sat up in bed. He resided in the bottom bunk, and he never got any visitors nor did he expect to have any anytime soon. Not for the unspeakable crime he had committed.
“You aight son,” he asked in a concerned tone. Larry was fifteen years Jude’s senior.
Jude suddenly flipped out. “Nigga, don’t fuckin’ talk to me!” he spat. “Don’t look at me! Don’t even acknowledge my fuckin’ presence!”
Larry remained calm as he allowed Jude to blatantly disrespect him. If it was any other young punk, Larry—who was six feet five inches tall and weighed a solid two-hundred and fifty pounds—would have laid their asses out, but Jude was his cellmate and they had to be able to live and tolerate each other. Besides, Jude had never jumped crazy at him before, and Larry figured that he probably just had a bad visit.
“Okay,” Larry nodded in understanding. “Okay.”
Jude, who was clearly frustrated and upset, dropped down onto the cold, cement ground and began doing pushups aggressively. He couldn’t believe how weak Cameron had portrayed herself to be.
***
Marcus was cruising through downtown Cleveland in his custom gunmetal black Chrysler 300. The interior was foggy as hell as he and Xavier smoked on the best loud Cleveland had to offer.
Notorious B.I.G.’s “Nigga’s Bleed” blared through the speakers of Marcus’s car as they made their way to Club Lush located off Superior Avenue.
Xavier sucked in a lungful of smoke, and suddenly went into a brief coughing fit before handing the blunt back to Marcus. “Aye, nigga, did you see the way Punisher was hatin’ last night?” he asked. “Nigga was mad everybody made money but him on his own birthday,” he chuckled.
“Fuck that nigga,” Marcus chuckled before taking a pull on the blunt. “Nigga too old to be still dancin’ anyway,” he said. “Need to be worrying about not burstin’ a blood vessel while he fuckin’ with that dick pump.”
Xavier and Marcus cackled at the crude thought. They doubted the women would still feel the same way about some of the male dancers who vacuumed their dicks just to be able to get hard enough to perform.