by Nancy Adams
"Okay, now somebody better let me in on who won the lottery," he said to Judy, who was standing in the kitchen. "I haven't smelled anything that good since the last time your mother came to visit. I know you said we’re celebrating something, but somebody needs to tell me what it is."
Katie and Kylie came into the room, both of them smiling from ear to ear.
"We're celebrating," Katie said, "the fact that I managed to walk six laps on the parallel bars today. Dr. Christopher says he believes I can be out of the wheelchair and using a walker by this weekend. Now, isn't that something to celebrate?"
Allen stood there in shock for a moment, and then burst into a big smile. "Baby girl, that is absolutely fantastic!" He spun to face his wife. "Honey, did you hear that? Our little girl is going to walk again!"
"Yes, I know," Judy said, laughing. Both of the girls were giggling at their father, who was nearly jumping up and down in his excitement. "These two have been telling me about it ever since I got home, trust me, I know!"
Allen hugged Katie Lou, and then hugged Kylie as well, just for good measure. He was excited, and wasn't embarrassed about letting it show. "Baby girl," he said, "this is so wonderful, I just can't find the words to say how wonderful it really is! Baby, I am so happy."
"You think you're happy?" Katie asked. "Daddy, this is an answer to a prayer! Dr. Christopher says he's never seen anyone respond as quickly, and as well, as I have. Of course, the damage wasn't as serious as it could have been, but still, just knowing there was the possibility that I could have been stuck in this chair for the rest of my life, that's—that's such a terrifying concept. I think about all the people who have been paralyzed, who can't ever walk again, or worse. I think, maybe when I'm out of this chair and really back on my feet, I want to think about going into counseling for people with similar problems. At least they would know that I knew how they felt."
Allen smiled, and shook his head. "Katie, I think maybe that could be the best possible thing you could do. Put this experience into good use, helping others with it."
"That's what Rob did," Kylie said. "Dr. Christopher, I mean. He got hurt in a car wreck when he was only thirteen, and spent four years in a wheelchair. That's the reason he became a physical therapist, because he understood and could help others."
"Yeah," Katie said, nodding. "That's my inspiration for this idea, knowing what he went through, and that instead of letting it ruin his life, he used it to set a direction that would benefit him and others. Sometimes, I think that having real-life experience with the problem makes you a lot more qualified to help people deal with it in their own lives."
Judy pushed Allen toward the table. "I agree, it's a wonderful idea," she said, "but if I have to wait any longer to taste some of that chicken, I'm probably going to die of frustration. Come on, let's get the food on the table and eat dinner."
She didn't have to tell Allen twice; he sat down at the table and looked up at Judy and Kylie expectantly. Katie joined him at the table while her mother and sister brought the platters and bowls over and took their own seats.
The family joined hands around the table, while Allen said grace. "Dear heavenly Father, we thank You for all of your many, many blessings. We thank You for this wonderful news, that Katie is so much closer to walking again. And we thank You for this wonderful meal, and the opportunity to sit down to enjoy it together. In Jesus's name, Amen."
They all dug in, happily enjoying the taste of fried chicken, mashed potatoes that were smothered in gravy, and that delicious cream-style corn. All of them felt that there couldn't have been a better celebration dinner, even at the fanciest restaurant.
Like most families, the Brennans enjoyed talking as they ate together. On that particular evening, most of the conversation was still related to Katie and her amazing progress. For just a moment, Allen considered bringing up his findings and opinions on the Corvette, but everyone was having such a good time that he didn't want to ruin the mood. This was the most upbeat evening the family had known since Katie's accident, and he wasn't about to bring it down.
When dinner was over, however, and he had a chance to speak with Judy alone, he decided to discuss it with her, first. Using a little code they had developed when the girls were young, he signaled her to join him in their bedroom for a private talk.
"Honey," he said, "you know that I've been going over Darren's car, right? Trying to find out what went wrong that night?"
Judy nodded. "Yes," she said. "Did you find it?"
Allen scowled and looked down at the floor. "Yes, and no," he said. "Honey, there was nothing wrong with the steering on that car before the accident. Nothing at all. I couldn't find anything that could possibly have caused Darren to lose control the way he said he did." He slowly raised his eyes to look into Judy's.
Judy slowly sank down to sit on the bed. "Allen, are you saying that he lied?"
"I'm saying that the only possible reason for the accident that did this to our daughter is either pure negligence, that he just wasn't paying attention and ran off the road into the tree, or else, and this is what I think is most likely, Darren fell asleep behind the wheel."
Judy was staring at him, her eyes wide and her face screwed up in a mixture of shock and anger. "But—but, Allen, he said something broke, and the steering wouldn't work."
Alan nodded. "Yes, I know that," he said. "But it isn't true. I didn't find anything, nothing at all, that could have been wrong with the steering before he hit the tree. Now, he's waiting for me to give him an official report on the damage, and on what went wrong with the car. When I tell him that I know there was nothing wrong, that's going to mean he is completely liable for the accident. Our insurance company, that's been paying all of these medical bills so far, is going to go after him hot and heavy. Now, his insurance will probably pay it, but that doesn't mean that they won't turn around and sue him."
Judy's face had hardened, and was now set in lines of pure anger. "You know, it's one thing to have such an accident, and then let it ruin the relationship they had, use it as a basis to back out of marrying our daughter. That's one thing he's done that makes me so angry that I have to keep reminding myself that I'm a Christian woman. But now, you're telling me that he not only has done this, but he was even so much of a coward that he lied about how the accident happened in the first place? Allen, I'm not sure I have it in me to forgive that son of a bitch!"
For a split second, Allen was afraid he was going to burst into laughter. It had been so long since he had heard his wife use such language that he was completely shocked. He managed to catch himself before it actually got out, however, and instead he crossed the room and sat down beside her on the bed. He reached out and put his arm around her, and Judy turned her face toward him, laid her head on his shoulder, and began to cry.
"Honey," Allen said, "don't let yourself focus on the bad parts. You've got to look at the good, and remember that this could have been so much worse. We could have lost Katie. She could've died. Maybe even worse than that, she could've ended up married to Darren. That might well have been a fate worse than death, if you think about it; I mean, what kind of man dumps his fiancée just because she's been injured in an accident that he caused? What kind of man uses the fact that she has a handicap as an excuse to break off the engagement? If he really believed that her condition would be a problem for his future career, then there's something seriously wrong with his judgment." He let out a sigh. "To be completely honest, I'm actually quite thankful that she learned this about him now, and that something didn't happened after they were married, maybe after they had children, that he would find detrimental to his career. A man like Darren wouldn't let anything stop him, so he would cast her aside even if she were already his wife. And if they had children? You can bet that he would use every legal trick in the book to make sure he got custody, and we might never even see those children again."
Judy rolled her eyes, but she nodded. "You're right, I know you are," she said. "It's just
so hard, watching her go through this. Allen, no matter how old she is, she's still our baby! That's my baby girl, and she's hurting, but there's nothing I can do to make it better! How do I deal with that? How could any mother deal with that?"
Allen tightened his arm around his wife, pulling her a little closer to him. Judy slipped an arm around his back and then another around his front until she had him in a hug.
"I think," Allen said, "that you're doing exactly what her mother should do to deal with it. You're loving your daughter, you're standing by her when she needs you most, and I think that's actually all you can do. And honey, I think that's exactly what a mother's job is in a situation like this."
The two of them sat there on their bed for several minutes, just holding onto each other. Each of them was praying silently, asking God for guidance and wisdom, to help them as they tried to help their daughter.
Out in the living room, the two girls had found a movie to watch. It was one of those recent movies that focused on the beauty of life, even in the midst of dying. Both of them were sniffling as they watched a young girl with a terminal disease trying to cope with the reality of her own life, while falling in love with a young man who had already overcome one cancer, only to find that he had another that he would not be able to beat.
"Wow," Katie said, "and I thought I had it bad. Stories like this remind you that things can always be worse, you know? Imagine what she's going through, and it makes my little problems seem pretty insignificant."
Kylie smiled, patting her sister on the arm. Katie had slipped out of the wheelchair and onto the couch in order to be more comfortable. "I'll tell you something I've learned, in all my long years of life," Kylie said, winking at her sister. "Nobody's problems are ever insignificant. Even though it may seem like someone else has it rougher than you do, that doesn't change the fact that you got it rough."
Katie turned and stared at Kylie. "I hate to admit this," she said, "but that may be among the wisest things I've ever heard anyone say. And it's so true, it really is. I'm going to remember that line, because I'm sure I'm going to need it when I start counseling people who have handicaps like mine. Did you come up with that on your own, or did you read that somewhere? I really want to know who to credit it to."
Kylie shrugged. "Well, I think I made it up. I don't remember ever reading it anywhere, at least. But you don't have to say you got it from me. I don't care if you say you made it up yourself."
"Oh, no," Katie said, "that's too good a line for me to steal credit for. I can see that actually helping a lot of people to accept the things that have happened to them, to stop feeling like it's some big sin to feel sorry for themselves. I mean, sure, you can take it too far; but I think it's okay to look at your circumstance and say, 'This shouldn't have happened to me. I didn't deserve this.' Don't you think so?"
Kylie reached over to the end table and picked up a bowl of candies that was sitting there, lifted off the cover and held it out to her sister. Katie Lou reached in and selected a mint, and popped it into her mouth. "Of course I think so," Kylie said. "In fact, I think that people who are always saying that other people's problems are more important than their own, I think they're only lying to themselves. If you get right down to it, humans are selfish, and down deep inside we all feel like what's happening to us is more important, bigger, worse, whatever, than the things that are happening to someone else. That's just human nature, isn't it?"
Katie was smiling at her sister. "Wow," she said. "I can't believe I'm hearing such wisdom coming out of my baby sister. Isn't that supposed to go the other way around? Isn't it me that’s supposed to be giving you all the sage advice?"
"Maybe so, but if you think I'm going to pass up the chance to sling it back at you, then you're nuts. I thought of something good to say, and I'm gonna get all the mileage out of it I can."
They both laughed, and went back to watching their movie. They ended up in tears more than once before it was over, and neither of them even noticed when their parents came into the room and sat down to watch with them.
When the movie ended, the four of them sat and talked about it for a few moments, and then Allen leaned forward in his chair. "Katie Lou," he said, "there's something I need to talk to you about. I've, um, I've been going over Darren's car. You know he asked me to try to find out what went wrong that night, why he lost control and hit the tree, right?"
Katie nodded, her eyes dark and her face blank.
"Well, I've gone over it from one end to the other, I've looked at every part that could possibly have caused the problem he claims he had, and even sent some of them out to experts to look over. To be perfectly honest, I can't find anything that could have gone wrong with the car before it hit the tree. I'm afraid that Darren lied about what happened, and that the truth is that he either fell asleep behind the wheel or else he just wasn't paying attention to the road and…"
Katie's eyes suddenly went wide, and her mouth flew open. Her father's words had triggered a memory, a memory that she had suppressed or lost in the accident; suddenly, as she heard what her father said, she remembered waking up in the Corvette and realizing that Darren was dozing behind the wheel, his head hanging down and his eyes closed. She hadn't even had time to try to wake him before her world suddenly became a nightmare.
She was nodding her head, vigorously, and her mouth was working but no sounds were coming out. In her mind, she was seeing it all again, seeing the road curve off to the left but the car going straight, and before she could react the tree was in front of them, and then the whole front end of the car was crumpling, the windshield was suddenly a spider web of cracks, the airbag exploding in her face but something was wrong, her body was thrown forward and something snapped, she saw the windshield exploding outward and then felt herself flying through the air, crashing into the ground and bouncing…
"He did, he fell asleep," she said. "I saw it, I remember now, I woke up from dozing and saw him, he was asleep behind the wheel!" Tears suddenly began flowing down her face, and she was crying hysterically. Judy jumped up and rushed to her, sitting beside her and pulling her into an embrace, but Katie kept crying, wailing out her anger, her fear, the shock of it all.
Allen simply stared at his daughter, wishing there were something he could do to take the pain away. Unfortunately, that was beyond a father's ability. All he could do was love her and try to help her make the best of the situation she found herself in, but no matter how he tried, he couldn't make it go away. Fathers didn't have that kind of power, no matter how much their daughters might wish they did.
Katie wept for almost an hour, finally remembering the accident itself and how badly it had hurt as it happened. She'd known it was bad, but reliving it now was almost more than her mind could take. She felt herself reeling, almost losing consciousness, but then snapping back to reality. It was like riding a roller coaster or seeing a horror movie.
When the crying began to subside, and Katie started to calm down, she was able to talk about it more coherently. The four of them discussed Darren's cowardice in not admitting the truth, and each of them admitted to the anger that was building inside them. It was Judy who reminded them that, as Christians, it was necessary for them to forgive him.
"I'll be honest," she said, "I wasn't sure, when your father first told me this a while ago, that I could ever forgive him. But we have to, it's the right thing to do, and it's not up to us to hold it against him. God is his judge, and ours as well; we have to do what is right in His eyes. It doesn't matter how we feel, we have to do what is right."
Katie shook her head sadly. "When I think about the fact that just a few days ago, I wanted to marry this man, it literally blows my mind. You know, I sit here and think back now, and I see so many things about him, about the way he acted, that were just—just wrong! I'm talking about things that, had I not convinced myself that I was in love with him, would have made me think he was a creep. I know they say love is blind, but this is ridiculous. I literally blin
ded myself to flaws in him that should have made me run like a scared rabbit. What was wrong with me?"
Kylie laughed, but it was filled with irony. "Well, you know, they say love is just a form of insanity. Maybe that's because, when you love someone, you have to make yourself just as crazy as they are. Maybe that's the only way you can really deal with the things about them that should make you run, that should scare you off."
Katie stared at her for a moment, then turned to face her parents. "Okay, let me introduce you to your new daughter, Kylie. She's been sitting here today blurting out bits of wisdom that are far beyond her years, and I'm not sure who she really is. This is somebody new, and I think she must be one of the body snatchers." She turned and looked at her sister. "Okay, confess! Who are you, and what have you done with the real Kylie?"
Kylie's eyes were wide. "Hey, it's me, really. Why is everyone so surprised that I have a brain inside this head? I mean, yeah, I know I'm beautiful, but that doesn't mean I have to be stupid, does it?"
Allen and Judy both suddenly cracked up laughing, and Allen shook his head. "Sweetheart," he said, "neither one of you girls could ever be called stupid! I cannot tell you how many times I have given thanks to God that you inherited your mother's brains, as well as her looks!"
Judy got up from the couch and walked over to her husband, plopped into his lap and threw her arms around his neck. She pulled him into a kiss, one that was comical and made both of the girls laugh when she released him with a loud Pop! "You let me tell you something, Allen Brennan," she said. "They got their brains and their looks from both of us! And don't you ever forget it!"
"Mmm," Allen said, "you kiss me like that again, and I’ll agree to anything you want! Within reason, of course, I should qualify that. No telling what you might want me to do, so I'd better be careful what I agree to."