I scowled at him. “Why are you being such a dick?”
Ben sat down as close to me on the bed as he possibly could, resting his hand gently on my thigh. “I know you were dreaming about him, about Avery. You should let him go...consider your options.” His eyes met mine with a look so sincere and hopeful I almost didn’t notice when he slid his fingers down, just slightly, to the line where my legs met.
I stood up quickly, forcing the blood in my body to rush somewhere besides where it had been rushing. I didn’t know whether to be embarrassed because Ben had invaded my dreams and seen me with Avery or because some small part of me was intrigued by his offer. We had more in common than I’d like to admit; maybe someday we’d even make kick ass Retro partners. And he was so, so frickity fracking pretty. Yes, I was attracted to him, and yes he turned me on. But he didn’t get my blood coursing like Avery did. He couldn’t. No one ever would. Being with Ben would be so much simpler, but I knew my heart wouldn’t be in it.
Ben playfully grabbed me around the waist and pulled me back down onto the bed, lying down beside me. The warmth of his hands on my waist reminded me that my body didn’t always give a crap whether my heart was in it or not. I braced myself for what was going to happen next, torn between slapping him and kissing him back.
“Chill out,” he whispered into my ear. I lay there paralyzed, my thoughts growing hazy, my brain ceasing to function momentarily.
Taking my silence as my acquiescence, he brushed his lips lightly across my cheek and over to the corner of my mouth. His tongue slid along my lower lip, probing. My mouth turned to his mouth, eager for more contact. Then we were kissing, slowly, and I knew I wasn’t supposed to be enjoying it so much, that it was wrong, but I didn’t want to stop.
Ben broke from my mouth and trailed his lips down my neck, sending a shiver through my body from head to toe. He eased on top of me. I didn’t protest. I wanted to feel the weight of him. Holding himself up on one elbow, he unbuttoned my shirt, letting it fall open. He planted soft kisses between my breasts and then pushed my bra up over them, resuming his exploration. I looked down at the top of his head, watching his blonde hair skimming over my skin.
It was the hair color that did it. My brain finally got the “that’s not Avery” signal and forced my body to push Ben off of me.
I scooted as far away from him as I could get, hastily buttoning my shirt up crooked. Ben shook his head, looking confused for an instant before recovering. “You need to learn to relax.”
“What I need is to figure out how I can get Avery back,” I spat.
“Not him again.” Ben lay on the bed, flinging his arm over his eyes dramatically. He reached down and blatantly adjusted himself. I just sat there, watching him, wondering what the hell I’d been thinking. I hadn’t, that was the answer. After a minute he sat up on his elbows and grinned at me. “You were a little bit into it, admit it.”
I answered him by blushing fiercely.
“Well, that’s something, at least.” He sighed, studying me. “You know I think you’re a dumbass for trying to be with your trigger, right?”
“Yes, you’ve made that pretty clear.”
“Especially when we could be hanging out,” his gaze flicked toward my chest, “if you know what I mean.”
I crossed my arms in front of me, deflecting.
He looked up at my face. “But, if you don’t want to be with me in that way, it’s not like I’m going to force you.” He paused, blinking hard. I sure as hell hoped he wasn’t considering forcing me and seeing what happened! “And if I have to hang out with you platonically, I suppose the least I could do is help.”
That was not at all what I was expecting him to say. Ugh. Could he be any more confusing? One minute he’s being super handsy, the next he’s being super handy. I did not get him.
Ben sat all the way up and chucked a notebook at me. “Write Avery a note and hide it somewhere for him to pick up tomorrow night.”
I gave him the stink eye. “Duh. You think I haven’t considered that already?”
He gave me a look that said, “I don’t know what the hell you’re thinking either, spazmatron.”
“How’s Avery supposed to know where to find it?” I said in a low voice.
“Claire.”
“What about Claire?” I shook my head. “I can’t tell her to do anything outright without getting her in trouble. Grandma’s glimpsing both of us every day to catch anything sneaky we may be doing.”
“I seriously doubt your grandma is paying any attention to what you and Claire are talking about.” Ben smirked. “She’s got more important things to deal with than the someday death of an idiot trigger who fully accepts that he’s going to die.”
Choosing to ignore him calling Avery an idiot trigger or asking him how he would feel if I called Connor that, I scooted closer to him on the bed. I needed his insight; with stuff like this I could trust he knew what he was talking about. “But Grandma promised Mom that she’d glimpse us and she wouldn’t let her down, not again.”
Ben snorted. “Zellie, sweetie, two things- your grandma is a cold hearted bitch and your mom is on your side. Even if your grandma came through and ratted you out like she is supposed to, I don’t think your mom would do anything.”
I slung my legs up onto the bed and leaned forward, resting my elbows on my knees, curious. “What makes you say that? Did you hear her say something?”
He shook his head. “No, but your mom’s a pretty nice lady and she didn’t exactly give up her trigger either.” He gave me a cocky wink. “Call it intuition.”
“Okay,” I said, testing him, “say I call up Claire and Grandma glimpses it and tells Mom. What if your intuition is wrong? What if this all blows up in my face and I get sent to L.A. and never see Avery again, all because I wanna write him a stupid note?”
Ben shrugged. Not the concrete answer I was hoping for. “So, use code. Claire’s super smart, she’ll catch on.” He held out his cell phone. “School’s been out for twenty minutes, she’ll be on her way to volunteer at Planned Parenthood.”
I smiled. “You know her schedule, huh?”
He lay back on the bed. “I’m keeping my options open.”
Seeing Claire’s number already displayed on the screen, I hit send.
“Hey, Benny,” Claire answered, fake breathless.
“Hey, baby,” I said back in my best cheesy man voice.
“Ugh! Zellie, what are you doing with Ben’s phone?”
“Calling you, baby.” Okay, now my voice was kinda morphing into Elvis. Not my best imitation.
“No duh. About what?” she huffed.
I took a deep breath, praying that Ben’s intuition was right. I answered in my normal voice. “Remember that thing we did that one time when we were in Mrs. Gates’ class? With that notebook and the potted plant and the fishbowl full of rubber bands?
“Yeah, totally.”
“I need to do that again, but for me instead of you.”
“Cool, got it.” She took a loud sip through a squeaky straw, mining what sounded like an empty drink. “The eagle has landed and what not.”
Well, that was easy. I grinned at Ben and gave him a thumbs up. He crossed his eyes at me. I slapped him on his right shin. “So, how’s school?”
“How do you think it is?” she snorted, “It blows, it sucks, it’s a vacuum of hell. I sit with your sister at lunch time.”
“Sorry.”
Claire sighed. “It’s not your fault. If Avery was my boyfriend I’d be trying to do him every second of every day too. I didn’t help matters with my big old bag o’ prophylactics either.”
Guilt crept into my chest. How was I ever going to tell Avery what had happened with Ben? “Your intentions were good.”
“They were. Now, what about Avery’s intentions? Were they good, or were they very, very bad?” she teased.
“You are such a perv!” I laughed, suddenly missing my best friend terribly. “Hey, what are you doing on Sa
turday? I could use some girl time.” As in, many hours away from boys and their pretty wandering mouths that could get me in trouble.
“Oh, goody! I was gonna see if you wanted to go with me to taste test cakes for my birthday party.”
“Did you really even need to ask?”
“I didn’t know if the zone on your house arrest anklet extended all the way to Zdeb’s Bakery.”
“Ha. That would be totally funny if it weren’t almost true. Let me ask Mel if she’ll come up to the cabin and stay with Mom on Saturday--”
Ben nudged me in the knee. “I’ll stay with your mom for you,” he whispered.
“Okay, uh, thanks,” I whispered back. “Ben’s going to stay with Mom, I guess. What time do you want me to pick you up?”
“Oh, my God!” Claire squealed, “I can’t wait to see you behind the wheel! Um, pick me up at 9:45.”
“Sounds good. All right, I better go.” Ben waved for me to hand his phone over. “Here, Ben wants to talk to you. Bye.”
I gave him his phone. He and Claire proceeded to both chat like girlfriends and flirt like celebutantes for another half an hour, making it pretty obvious to me that our make out session had been no big deal to him. If he could see it that way, so could I, I decided, feeling relieved.
While I was waiting for them to finish chatting, I wrote my first note to Avery. I had a lot to say to him and I was going to have to tell him about Ben, but not in a note. Besides, it couldn’t be longer than one notebook page folded into quarters. It had to fit underneath the lid of the toilet tank in a Ziploc bag.
Dear Avery,
If you’re reading this then I guess Claire really did understand what I was talking about. Either that or you’re weird and like to check out people’s toilet tanks. :)
I think it’s safe for us to be passing notes like this...Ben thinks Mom won’t tell on me if Grandma glimpses this note or anything having to do with you.
Oh Avery, I love you, okay? This is soooo stupid and I’m going to try my hardest to figure everything out. Trust me, please. I know you do.
You’ll be happy to know that Mom’s fine, she’s on bed rest - you probably heard from my dad. Don’t worry, though, our little bro appears to be doing just fine. What do you think they’ll name him? Please do not let it rhyme with Zel or Mel. Ha! Aiden would be nice, I like that name - it goes good with yours. :)
What have you been up to? Well, what have you been up to while you’re awake - I know what you’re up to at night. (Nice dream btw, perv - JK) I’ve been up to...not a whole heck of a lot. Taking care of Mom - oh, I did get my license, finally! That’s cool, I guess. Tell Jason I’m driving the Legacy now and to thank his dad again for giving it to Mom, that was totally nice of him. What else? I’m gonna get my GED - it’s 5 tests, did you know that? Whatever. I got some study materials today, so I’m going to get on that and then no more school for me ever again! (Well, until we go away to college, right?)
I miss everything about you. Write me back please. I’ll see you in church, but we probably won’t be able to say much. Keep dreaming, okay. :)
Love you,
Zellie
P.S. We never talked about Christmas. I got you something a month ago and it’s not huge or anything, but it’s not gonna fit under the toilet tank lid, that’s for sure. Can you ask your mom if we’re allowed to at least give each other Christmas gifts? I think this note thing is as sneaky as we should be. I in NO WAY want to be permanently separated from you!!!!!!
I thought about putting on some lipstick and kissing the note, but I didn’t want Ben to get all snarky about me making out with paper again. I folded it up into a small little rectangle, looking around the room for a Ziploc. I could go get one from the kitchen, but I didn’t want Mom to wonder why I needed it.
Ben pulled a bag from his pocket and tossed it at me. He was certainly being Johnny-on-the-spot today.
“Thanks,” I mouthed. He nodded back.
I put the note in the bag, sealed it and grabbed a roll of double sided tape I’d been using to wrap Christmas presents from my desk. Tiptoeing to the bathroom, I knocked lightly on the door to make sure the coast was clear and then went in, shutting the door behind me. I could hear mom and Aunt Hazel and Frank talking in the family room. Now was my chance.
Slowly, I lifted the lid off of the back of the toilet and set it upside down on the bath mat in front of the tub. After checking twice more that the bag was tightly sealed, I adhered several strips of tape to the bag and to the inside of the lid. Then, I replaced the lid and flushed. After waiting for the tank to fill up again, I checked to make sure it was still in place and it was. I added a few more strips of tape just to be sure and then lowered the lid as quietly as I could. Perfect. Now all I had to worry about was my pregnant mom using the bathroom every five minutes and Avery retrieving the note without getting caught.
“What you’re telling me,” Wes asked, “is that instead of weakening Ben’s powers like you thought you were doing, they’re getting stronger?” .
Christopher rubbed his eyes. Coming out of a glimpse was always a bit disorienting, like waking up in a hotel room. He’d blurted out what he’d seen the second his eyes opened, but he still needed a moment to get back to reality. A moment to shake away the glimpse of Ben and Zellie in the woods, her eyes bloodshot and his not. “Yes, that’s what I’m saying. I don’t know what’s going on exactly, I’m not even sure that there’s a connection between my attempt to control Ben’s mind and his powers growing stronger. I do know that he is definitely having more frequent and accurate glimpses since he came to town.” Christopher rested his head on the back of his camel colored chenille couch and put his feet up on the dark cherry coffee table. “I suppose Zellie could be affecting Ben the way Avery affects her? Strengthening his powers? They’re definitely developing a bond.”
Wes sat next to him on the couch, close, but not touching, clearly distressed by Christopher’s latest revelations. “And Zellie, is she getting better at anything? Has she made contact with the spirit world?”
“Hardly,” Christopher said. “My control over Zellie is still strong. She’s not thinking about anything besides how to communicate with Avery, which is ridiculous by the way - they’re stashing notes in the toilet tank.”
“Ben needs to go first then. You shouldn’t wait until Claire’s party. I’ve always thought your need to destroy both of them at the same time was overly dramatic. Let’s just kill them when it’s most convenient and be done with it.” Wes placed his hand on Christopher’s thigh. “Honey, I can tell this is taking a toll on you. You’re exhausted. It may be time to face the fact that you’re not as powerful as you thought you were.”
Christopher huffed. “Wesley, honey, while I appreciate your misplaced concern for my well-being, we’ve got a concrete plan and I’m sticking to it. Ben and Zellie have to die together for maximum effect. The Society has to be shown that I wield enough power to take down two Retroacts, especially these two who have so much promise and come from such strong lines. They need to be afraid. They need to feel terrorized.”
Wes rolled his eyes. “If you say so,” he said and then muttered “drama queen” under his breath. “I don’t suppose you’d consider telling Pastor Paul about the notes Zellie and Avery are sending each other, make things a little more exciting for my benefit?”
Christopher shook his head. “Sorry, I’m afraid I’ve laid the suggestions on too thickly with Paul Wells - he’d send Zellie straight to Los Angeles without a moment’s hesitation if he found out anything was going on between her and Avery still.” Christopher rested his hand on the couch, palm up and open to receive the shadow of Wes’s hand. “I need everyone to stay in Rosedell. Trust the plan. Trust me.”
Unable to resist the beauty of his partner’s deep brown eyes, Wes forwent the handholding and climbed onto his lap, immersing himself in Christopher’s body, sending tickling static to all of his nerve endings.
Christopher laid his head back on th
e couch again, closing his eyes. His relationship with Wes had few advantages, but this was one of them. He stretched his body out languidly, extending his fingers and toes, letting Wes take him over.
A warm energy spread through him, elevating his mood and making him smile faintly. He always imagined the energy, Wes’s energy, as a transparent glimmer of light rising up from within him and settling on the surface of his skin, illuminating him from the inside out.
After a few minutes the glimmer increased to a pulsating buzz, making Christopher break out in a full-on smile. Arching his torso off of the couch, he became completely overcome with energy before letting go and sinking back into the cushions.
Wes rose from Christopher, standing over him, a smile of his own plastered across his face. “Feel better?”
Christopher slid sideways and lay down on the couch, his eyes still closed. “Much. You are so good at that.”
“See? I do have my uses,” Wes chuckled.
“Indeed,” Christopher said, hugging a throw pillow to his chest and slipping off into a contented sleep.
Wes moved out onto the balcony of their condo. He stood there watching the sun set, seeing what was probably a cold, brisk wind blow through the evergreen trees that lined the driveway to their complex. He missed that; something as stupid as feeling the wind on his face. But was it reason enough to betray Christopher like he was?
Jumping through the iron railing that enclosed the balcony, Wes floated to the ground, longing to feel the earth pounding into his feet, the jarring shock of his gravity reverberating through his calf muscles. Instead he felt nothing. No, it wasn’t stupid to want to feel things again.
He closed his eyes, concentrating on Mildred’s sweet grandmotherly face, her sparkling blue eyes, and her long silver braid that hung down her back. He felt her acknowledge that he was summoning her and had opened herself up to receiving him. Wes disappeared.
Zellie Wells Trilogy (Glimpse, Glimmer, Glow) Page 24