by Maia Starr
“We can’t have sex, and we can’t start a family. Why?” I demanded. “I mean, it’s not like I want to start anytime soon or anything. But, you chose me, and I didn’t really have a say in it. Now we’ve had sex, and I’m worrying all day that some shifter is going to pop out of the blue and snatch you up. I mean, you did say this was your punishment, which, you know, fills me with a lot of comfort,” I snapped sarcastically.
“Are you done?” he said, raising a brow with annoyance.
“No!” I huffed and moved his drink away from him.
“You’re free to leave anytime you want,” he snapped.
“No,” I said in a drawn out fashion. “Because I’m in it now!”
“You’re… in it,” he repeated slowly.
“Yeah, you know, as in…” I felt my face flush and couldn’t believe what I was about to say. I felt like I was in middle-school as suddenly I was talking a mile a minute, my tone sitting somewhere between smitten and embarrassed, and defensive, as I spewed, “Well, I love you, okay? That’s what Meghan and I argued about. I love you. I think you’re interesting, and I want to be around you all the time. Does that spell it out for–”
“I love you, too,” he said quickly; a smile was creeping over his features as he grabbed my hands, looking absolutely stunned. “I love you so much I feel this flame stir up in me when we have to be apart.”
I wanted to tell him not to be sweet, not to make me feel amazing, but I couldn’t. I took that moment to be selfish and listen to him gush about how much he loved me in the way that men do when there is no one else around to judge them.
My heart ached with the same intensity he’d just shared with me and then I said, “Have you ever been with a human woman?” My tone was somewhere between sadness and curiosity.
“Once,” he said, his demeanor falling now. His eyes flicked back and forth for a single second before his gaze became lost on the wall behind me. “Targeg told you,” he said with sudden realization.
“No, Meg did.”
“And here I thought you didn’t talk to Meg.”
“Well, you’re going to want to brace yourself, because there’s something else I’ve been lying about.”
“Perfect,” he snapped.
The silence played with our tension for a moment more before I continued, “Only once?” There was a laugh on the tip of my tongue. “And here I thought your kind was supposed to mate for life? Or is that just another rumor created to make you sound nobler than a bunch of common–”
Before I had the chance to take a breath, Caridan whipped in front of me and grabbed me by my neck. His smooth flesh felt minty cold against my skin, and I bristled beneath him, grappling in vain against the grip of his large fingers. I panicked for a breath, and my eyes widened as he watched with no change in expression.
“That is not a lie,” he said through gritted teeth and lifted me from the ground, so I was now at eye level with him. “I chose her, I loved her, another raped her, and so I killed him. Then the Koth killed her, and I have been banished from choosing ever again. Happy?” His tone was matter of fact, but I could hear the furor building up in his voice. “The dragon I killed was Brenem’s brother, and we have sought for blood ever since. Now why are you doing this?!” he suddenly screamed, a growl coming through his human tones that made me shake beneath him.
As I shook, he suddenly set me on the floor and never broke eye-contact with me. I pulled back in agony and suddenly burst into tears as I blurted out, “Caridan, I’m pregnant.”
The words spilled out of my mouth like an echo that rang over and over again. I couldn’t stop them any longer. He looked at me in absolute terror, and then rage filled his eyes. It was the reaction that I’d feared the most.
“Listen,” I said calmly, but he wouldn’t.
The way he looked at me made me feel like my stomach had just dropped out from under me. He didn’t ask if I was sure. He didn’t say anything. He just stared at me, believing my every word and hating me for it.
I could feel the tears spilling down my face but barely registered the sensation of crying; couldn’t feel the pull at my throat or my chest tightening. Instead, I simply watched as he spun on his heel and headed for the door.
“Caridan!” I yelled as I followed him down the hall, but he didn’t turn around. I found myself running on sore feet to catch him.
“Why did you do this!?” he finally whispered through gritted teeth, whipping around as we reached the field beside the apartment we had made out beautiful home.
“Last I checked, there were two of us involved in this mess, and look, I know you’re scared, but we can figure…”
My words escaped me as Caridan pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. “They’ll want us dead. You and me both.”
“We’ll find a way,” I went to touch his arm, my body aching for him to wrap his wings around him and secure me in his warmth, to tell me everything was going to be alright. Instead, he jerked away from me as though the very touch of me sent a chill of pain through his veins.
“You don’t know what they’ll want me to do.”
“Uh, I think I can figure out the mystery,” I snapped back. “They killed your last chosen. That doesn’t exactly scream a victory for me, but… what? You’re just… fine with that?”
His eyes went wide with anger, and he narrowed his gaze at me, inching dangerously close to my lips. “Excuse me? Am I ‘fine with that?’ Is that what you really just asked me?”
“We can figure this out,” I said evenly, trying to calm him with my tone. “I want to be with you. Do you want to be with me?”
“You know I do.”
I snorted at the statement, a reaction that seemed to draw him back. “Forgive me if I’m finding that a little hard to believe right now.”
“Ariella,” he said forcefully. Suddenly the moment was frozen and still. His eyes twittered back and forth like a pendulum, as though I might say something bright enough to get us out of this situation. He went to speak and then seemed to think better of it. His demeanor finally seemed to soften, and he looked up at me with a calculated glance and asked, “Did you tell your sister?”
My heart froze in place, and my stunned look said it all to him.
His momentary calm faded away once more and he cried out, “Why!? Why would you do this!?”
“So, what?!” I shouted, finally finding my courage. “That’s it for us? You’re not going to fight for this? You said you loved me!”
“You told her,” he whipped around and smashed his tail against the chair nearby, pitching it across the room with force. “Do you know what you’ve done?”
The rest of my words escaped me, and suddenly he began to shift. His bones dislodged and careened around his body, scales suddenly showering over him like a waterfall; his face pained as the shock of it all moved through him.
Purple tones caressed his body as his wings began to grow. It was then that I knew I was about to see him in full form, a sight he had tried to show me weeks ago when he told me he wanted to share everything with me. I had been too scared to see it then and was still terrified to have to witness it.
I backed away instinctively and screamed his name, as though pleading with him not to take on full form. I could see the shriek startled him. He breathed heavily, and a plume of smoke escaped his mouth as I tried desperately to stop the process.
Then it was over, and he stood before me, not the Caridan I knew in still moments and stolen silences, but a massive dragon. He was shaded in deep purples and black with a bony, thorny skull. There were rows of horns atop his head that were only made to look more menacing by his curved, small ears. His nose was pointed and long with horns creeping out of his chin and jawline. He let out a baleful roar that echoed through the skies and across the hills and valleys.
My body shook under the weight of the sound, and I backed away instinctively. I could hear the echo of his cry as it hurried through the field we were standing in, bringing a powerful g
ust of wind behind it.
His wide neck ran down from his head into an enormous mass with thundering wings. Growths that looked like steeples cascaded down his back to his massive tail.
He looked at me, and even through his new veneer, I could tell he was tortured. He didn’t respond. Instead, my eyes followed the purple dragon as he took to the sky with a terrifying scream, the gust from his wing knocking me to the ground.
I looked into the night and watched as he disappeared into blackness, only the sound of him carrying through the skies.
Chapter Ten
Caridan
“She’s what?!” Targeg exclaimed as I told him the news.
My mind reeled at the news from the last hour. A life with Ariella seemed too good to be true, and that’s because it was. I had violated our forefathers’ wishes on too many occassions. Even if we’d found a way to run, now Meg would tell Brenem, and he would be after me faster than I could imagine.
In fact, I was surprised I’d made it this far without him on my tail.
I should have been elated to start a life with Ari. My child in the pit of her stomach brought me tremendous joy, and that was quickly replaced with sick, utter fear. I should have been happy, but I was only furious. Furious at her for being culpable, for building something with me and then simultaneously tearing it down, for pushing it – and furious at myself for being too weak to resist.
She’d stolen me from my world of misery, and then she’d signed the warrant for my death.
I found my way out towards the mines. As soldiers, we were sent down to the mines to assist researchers, as well as diggers. But, as of late, we were sent to protect it from other dragons. The mines were filled with Marraflowers, the same agent Ari had been working so hard to find. Though it was late, I’d asked Targeg to meet with me, desperate for someone to talk to.
The blue and yellow dragon dragged his hand along the gold stone of the mines behind us as we walked. His eyes were growing more and more distant the longer we explored.
“Here I thought you guys were staying free and clear of doing the dirty.”
I offered him a deadpan stare and flatly replied, “Surprise.”
My friend continued to look off into the distance, his expression caked with a dawning worry. I knew why.
Disobedience meant death in our culture. They would think nothing of killing me, especially now that Targeg was on his way to breathing fire. That thought in itself had me inwardly cursing Ari for being so studious with her time here on Udora.
“Damn that girl for being so useful,” Targeg breathed as though he could read my mind. “What are you going to do?”
I fell sullen, a sight that worried him. Targeg’s spines furled up, and a look of undue disgust settled on his face. “Caridan!” he lectured. He knew there was always an unspoken precaution only rumored of in hushed whispers amongst choosing’s gone awry: kill her. Get rid of her. The unspoken rule should a human mate start controlling a Weredragon, get herself into trouble, or start negatively affecting the Koth.
Targeg studied my expression and whipped his tail vigorously from side to side, a deep frown settling between his brows. “I could always say the child is mine,” he said. “Save you some grief.”
I thought on that, the very sentiment filling me with jealousy. My eyes traced his form, and I dismissed his offer. “They’d know you were lying.”
To my surprise, he nodded in agreement. “So, what, you’re going to kill her?” he asked with disgust, his knee bent and foot resting on the wall behind him. He crossed his arms and leaned into his new pose as he waited for my response. “You can’t do that, Car.”
I thought on it and blinked. The answer was easy, but I wished it wasn’t. “No, of course not,” I relented with a sigh.
“Then you’ve got a month to figure this out,” he said brashly and leaned away from the wall. Every three months, the humans would undergo tests to make sure their bodies were adjusting to life on Udora. Then they’d know she was with child. My child.
I let that thought sink in. She was everything I wanted. We’d fought relentlessly to get the other to admit emotional defeat; to admit we were intrigued by the thought of falling in love. She defeated me as much as I did her. That was how we ended up in this mess in the first place.
I told her I loved her, and then I disappeared. It was the worst mistake I ever could have made. Now, all I wanted to do was go back and make love to her and relish the thought of starting over with someone who made me feel as alive as she did.
“You could send her back to Earth,” Targeg suggested and then immediately corrected, “But they’d send her out with a physical and then they’d just find out anyway. Man!” He exhaled in frustration. “You really screwed it up this time, Car.”
“I’ve been through worse,” I said with a defeated smirk.
“She’s doing good work. They might let this one go. Hell, they love breeders anyway, right?”
“Not from me,” I said through gritted teeth.
“Say it’s Brenem’s… say he took advantage of her?” he shrugged and kicked the stones out from under his feet. We both watched as they ricocheted off the cave walls and trickled down a hole in the floor with a snapping echo. “Do you think her sister would back her up?”
“I don’t know.” I didn’t know if Ari was even talking to her. Her honesty with me was questionable at best these last few weeks. I didn’t know what was true anymore.
“They’d probably worship it if they thought it was Brenem’s,” he continued.
“We’re not saying it’s Brenem’s!” I shouted. “We’re not saying it’s anyone’s, okay?!”
“Geez, let go of your pride for two seconds to consider an alternative here, Caridan!”
I stared off into the darkness of the mine and became lost in my thoughts, incredulous to the situation I had found myself in. Maybe it was my pride holding me back. Maybe Targeg was right; the better man; the one for Ari all along.
“It’s mine,” I snapped finally. “It’s my problem.”
“So, what are you going to do?”
My ears perked up before I had a chance to respond and my gaze met my friends. A screech filled the hollow walls of the mines; it was a war cry we would know anywhere. It was Brenem.
I bit my lip and looked to the floor for just a moment before the piercing cry echoed through the cave once more. He was close. Targeg grabbed my arm, and I looked at him with all the sincerity I could muster. We both knew what was coming.
“I’m sorry,” I said suddenly, my dry words escaping me unwillingly. “That I’ve been so–”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hey, buddy boy! We’re not saying goodbye yet, alright? Let’s show this condescending rat dragon why he should learn to keep his big maw shut.” He raised his brow and grinned playfully. “Shall we?”
The steps out of the cave were slow and precise, like the pair of us had mapped out exactly how we would move to defend one another when this day inevitably came.
We approached a clearing in the mossy fields just outside the mines. Udora’s air became so cold at night it felt as though dew drops hit my skin. As we walked farther into the field, I could feel Targeg rushing up beside me. He looked at me, and I at him, then my eyes caught Brenem’s, and suddenly I knew: this was the end.
This was what it had all been building up to. The fight.
“I heard we have a little problem,” came the smug laughter from the red dragon. Upon closer inspection, I saw Ari in his arms, and I felt a sick repulsion run through my body like it was in a race against itself.
“Don’t!” Targeg yelled, but at once I felt my body change. My wings gusted at my side and by the time I reached Brenem I knew I had already shifted, the intense pain shocking its way through my body. The scales at my side lit up in anger as the red dragon held her limply in his hand; the same smug arrogance that lived by his smile never leaving his expression.
“Somebody’s made an awful mistake, Car. And I think it’s
about time that somebody is held accountable, don’t you think?”
With those words, it was as if the whole world had stopped and at once he threw Ariella into the air without a second thought.
My eyes widened as I saw her dress billow behind her and I raced for her, catching her on my back. My chest heaved with heavy breaths as the fury overcame me. I wouldn’t wait for permission any longer.
“No need to tell you what I did with her sister!” he yelled.
I couldn’t fathom whether he was bluffing, but I had no doubt that he would kill that girl with no second thought – and he would do the same to Ari if I couldn’t stop him. That was his declaration of war against me, and I was more than ready.
“Targeg, grab her!” I demanded, and my friend quickly grabbed her away from me. “Take her somewhere safe.”
Still in his human form, Targeg scooped her up in his arms, and I watched as she gripped onto him like
She looked at me for the briefest moment, her eyes weighed down with weariness. “Caridan,” she said weakly and reached out for me.
From my shifted form, she looked so small, so fragile compared to how she looked in my bed. I looked to Brenem and then quickly back to Ariella, using my wings as a shield for the both of us. I bent my forearms down so I could kneel in front of her, my large stature still towering over her.
“I do love you,” I said firmly. “I’m sorry I was such a fool.”
Amidst it all, she gave me a smile. With a light roll of her eyes, she quipped, “Well, I always knew that.”
“That I love you, or that I’m a fool?”
She stared at me with a soft and sweet forgiveness and simply shrugged as she said, “Both.”
There was no more time to spare. I nodded in her direction and said, “I will make this right for us; I promise.”
With that, I raced for Brenem, who was flying up ahead. He changed his speeds consistently to make it difficult to catch him. And it was. When I felt I had reasonably caught up, I took a chance and bashed him with my wing, pushing as hard as I could to knock him back to the ground. His stony spines shot up like fields of molten rock, and he grinned at me.