Chapter Twenty-Three
“I cannot think of anything,” Christopher murmured angrily as his fist clenched at his side. How could he have given such a response? Never had he felt so foolish! Well, perhaps he had, but this had to be one of the more foolish things he had done in his life. Here was the woman he cared for waiting for him to speak sweet words to her, and he had to blunder it mundane statements of a need to leave and that he had nothing more to say. What a buffoon! A complete ninnyhammer! He did not deserve a woman as witty and beautiful as Amelia!
“Speaking to oneself is a sign of madness,” Lilias said from her seat across from him as she grasped the handle of the carriage. “Although I do not believe it true in all instances.” She gave him a mischievous grin.
Christopher sighed and leaned back into the cushion. “You may be wrong about that,” he said. “I made a complete fool of myself with Amelia twice this afternoon. Can you believe I told her she is a good friend? The woman must be thinking of ways to end our courtship this very moment, and I cannot blame her.”
Lilias swiped at her skirts as she shook her head. “And what other foolish thing did you say?”
He closed his eyes. “It was not what I said but rather what I did not say,” he said with a sigh. He should not have mentioned any of it. Siblings could share some things, but this was not what a brother shared with a sister! Sisters tended to use such information against their brothers later.
“So, the woman told you her affection for you,” Lilias said, “and you wanted to return the sentiment but could not because you were paralyzed with fear. Do I have it correct?”
“I - how did you know?” He shook his head despondently. “It is as if you have heard my thoughts. Women seem to possess some sort of exceptional insight to men’s thoughts.”
Lilias laughed. “Oh, my dear brother. Two things led me to my understanding. The first is that I overheard you speaking.”
“You spied on us?” Christopher asked with incredulity.
“Hardly,” his sister replied with a sniff. “Your whispers are like a horse trotting down the road. I tried very hard not to listen, but you made it impossible.”
“You said there were two things?” He was uncertain he wanted to know the other.
“Oh, yes, that one is easier to understand. You are no different from every other man that walks the earth.”
He frowned. “What do you mean?”
“Men are terrified to share what they feel,” she replied. “And why is that, by the way? Is it some sort of code a man must live by? ‘We may never express our feelings.’ Is it some sort of commandment taught to men during their years at school? Or is it passed from father to son?”
“I am sorry,” he said with a sigh. “I cannot discuss such matters with you. You are my sister, for goodness’ sake. And you are a woman.”
This made Lilias laugh and her cheeks to redden. “So, I was not far from the truth,” she said. Her voice was not angry but amused. “You will worry yourself sick instead of speaking to me about your troubles? Very well, if that is what you wish, I will ask you no more questions on the matter.”
Christopher nodded and turned his gaze to the window. He preferred that she did not ask any questions; he had to work this out for himself. However, his worry increased as he considered what could happen next. Would Amelia be so upset that she wished to end their courtship? Would he have yet another woman go in search of a man she deemed more appropriate for her?
With a sigh, he turned back to his sister. “I suppose I have little choice,” he said. “I will tell you what concerns me.” He looked down at his hands in order to collect his thoughts. “I do care for Amelia, yet when I wished to tell her as much, my mind turned to the past.”
“Your past? What past?”
He nodded. “I told you that I spoke to Allison at the party?” Lilias nodded. “Seeing her brought back the memories of how every woman for whom I have cared has hurt me. I know in my heart that Amelia is nothing like them, but I cannot shake the fear that takes over me.” Admitting such a weakness was uncomfortable. “I explained this to Amelia, of course, and she says she understands, yet I cannot help but worry.”
Lilias sighed. “What you say is nothing new. Men and women both worry about what they have endured before. Unfortunately, the past often dictates how we respond to the present. You either trust her or do not trust her. Make your decision and stick to it, otherwise you are being unfair to Amelia.”
“Perhaps you are right,” Christopher replied. “I find it difficult to do so, however.”
“Did she not trust you?” his sister demanded. “She saw you with your former fiancée — in her arms, mind you — and yet, Amelia trusted your word despite what she had seen. Or what she thought she had seen.” She leaned forward and placed a hand on his knee. “You are my brother, and I do love you. Therefore, I say this with the utmost respect. Lying and distrust will impede your relationship.”
Christopher considered her words. What Lilias said was true. He had promised to release the past, but instead he allowed it to control his life. If he truly believed Amelia was different from other women, he had to trust her. More importantly, he had to be forthright with her about his feelings. Come Tuesday, whatever he felt for her — be it love or a strong admiration, he would be honest and reveal it to her.
***
Christopher sighed as he pushed aside the ledger. He had already spoken to his father and now awaited the arrival of an important business partner. The two families had worked together for years, Christopher’s father owning the majority stakes in all of their partnerships. His father had made his fortune in the shipping industry, and being the man he was, he had offered to bring others in on his windfall.
“One does not see success on his own,” his father had counseled. “When we share our good fortune with others, we will see it grow tenfold.” His father had never spoken truer words, for once he had allowed new investors to join, he saw a sharp incline of earnings. Yes, his father was a shrewd and clear-sighted businessman.
What had Christopher curious about this particular meeting was that his father had always traveled to meet with this man. Today, however, the man would come to him for the first time since the partnership had been formed. What would bring him all the way to Rumsbury? And in the middle of winter? Whatever the reason, his correspondence had said it was urgent and that he needed to speak to Christopher immediately.
“My lord,” Reeves said from the doorway, startling Christopher from his musings, “Mr. Parker has arrived.”
Christopher stood as one Mr. Josiah Parker entered. The man controlled one of the largest fortunes in all of England, and Christopher was honored to have the man in his home. Granted, he was not titled, but even the aristocracy could look past his untitled standing to reach the vast holdings he possessed. They may whisper about the man behind his back, but to his face, he received the utmost respect.
“Ah, Mr. Parker,” Christopher said, moving around the desk to take the man’s hand, “it is a pleasure to finally meet you. Father has spoken highly of you.”
“The honor is mine,” Mr. Parker said. “I hope your father is well.”
“Some days are better than others,” Christopher replied. “Regretfully, he is unable to attend today’s meeting.” He motioned to one of the chairs before the fireplace. “Please, sit. Can I get you a drink? Wine? A brandy perhaps?”
Mr. Parker took a seat and replied, “A brandy, if you please.”
“Of course.” Christopher poured them each a measure and handed one of the glasses to Mr. Parker.
“Thank you,” the man replied. “Now, Christopher…you do not mind if I call you Christopher, do you?”
It was a strange request, but he had no reason to object. “Of course.”
“Christopher, our families have been in several business ventures together over the years, and during that time, your father has remained an honorable man.”
“Indeed,” Christopher re
plied. “And we will always conduct business honorably.” Was he here to make some sort of accusation against his father? Or perhaps against Christopher? If so, he would be greatly disappointed, for never had his father been dishonorable in anything, be it personal or professional. “My father’s penchant for business and charity alike are unmatched.”
Josiah let out a small sigh. “Forgive me,” he said with a wave of his hand. “I did not mean to insinuate that he has fallen short of his reputation. In fact, I know he has not.”
“Then I admit that I am curious about your request to meet,” Christopher said, never one to beat around the bush when it came to business matters. “If you do not mind me saying, I have been led to believe that you do not travel for business but rather allow business to travel to you.”
“Typically I do not,” the man replied. “My time is much too precious to spend in a carriage, and many come to me because of who I am. Perhaps that is arrogant to say, but I think it is true, nonetheless.”
Christopher could only nod. What he said was true. If any was given the opportunity to do business with the Parker family, he would do whatever was asked of him, including traveling to wherever this man requested.
“As to my reason for this meeting, I did find an accounting error, but it has nothing to do with business. You see, a member of my household is missing.”
Christopher raised his brows in surprise. “I am sorry to hear that,” he replied. What did this have to do with him? “Do you have any idea where this person may be?”
“I do. She is at Scarlett Hall with her aunt. She is my niece, you see.”
For a moment, Christopher sat stunned. “Amelia?” he asked without thinking, hoping beyond hope that the man did not speak of the woman for whom he had come to care deeply. Yet, who else could it be? “Amelia is your niece?”
Amelia Parker. When Christopher had asked her, she had said plainly that she was not a relation to the infamous Parker family. Since Parker was a common surname, he had taken her word for it. Why had she lied?
“Indeed,” Mr. Parker said. “We have been terribly worried about her, for we fear she will walk the same path her aunt walked.”
“I am afraid I do not understand,” Christopher said with a frown. “Lady Lambert is a formidable woman.”
“I will not go into detail,” Mr. Parker replied. “Let us just say that she left the family against the direct orders of our mother. But that is all I will say on the matter, for my current concern is for my niece.”
“But she made no mention of you,” Christopher said.
Mr. Parker laughed. “I would think not considering the trouble she is in.” He lifted the glass and studied the liquid. “A fine vintage.”
“Concerning Amelia,” Christopher said, not wanting the man to change the topic of conversation. “I must admit that I am confused. She came to Scarlett Hall to live with her aunt, of which I am aware. She made no mention of trouble…” He paused and then mumbled, “Except when those two men went after her.”
“What has Amelia told you exactly?”
Christopher went to respond, but a thought caught his tongue. “How did you learn that I know Amelia?”
Mr. Parker gave him a patronizing smile. “Nothing happens in this country without my knowledge. Now, tell me what she has told you.”
Christopher found his confusion muddling his ability to think clearly. Had she lied to him all along? “She said that a man wished to marry her, but she did not want to marry him. Therefore, she came to live with her aunt. We met at a hotel in Stratford when two men tried to abduct her. They made the attempt again here in Rumsbury. I offered her safe passage in my carriage, but I promise I never stepped out of line. I would never be so disrespectful, especially with a young lady of the ton.”
Mr. Parker rose and served himself another glass of brandy as if he had every right to do so. Christopher barely noticed.
“That is an interesting tale,” the man said. “One of heartbreak and perhaps even redemption. Sadly, it is a tale woven by a servant.”
“I came to understand that Amelia is not a servant,” Christopher said, feeling the need to defend the woman for whom he cared a great deal. “She only pretended to be one in order to keep from being discovered.” Confusion made his head spin; none of what Mr. Parker said made any sense. Then again, neither had what Amelia told him when they first met.
Mr. Parker returned to his seat and placed a foot on the opposite knee. “Allow me to fill in what you do not know. You see, her mother had an affair with a man already married, which of course resulted in the birth of Amelia. Such actions merit banishment from the family, but my mother extended kindness and allowed her to remain at Chatterly Estate as a servant, where she worked alongside her mother. Their stomachs were always full and their days mostly content. As Amelia grew older, my heart went out to her. She was being punished for the actions of her mother, and I found this unfair. Therefore, I saw she was educated in the ways of the ton — call it an act of charity if you will.” He shook his head at some untold memories. “We grew quite close and she became like a daughter to me. However, I made my gravest mistake and the trust I had in the young woman I had thought she had become was forever broken.”
“Trust?” Christopher whispered. Had he not put all of his trust in her?
“Indeed, trust,” Mr. Parker echoed. “The trust I have in every business arrangement I have made. The trust one builds with others in his family’s name. It was in that trust that I introduced her to a family friend. She was smitten with him as much as he was with her. They began to court, and Amelia promised to marry the man.”
“Marry?” Christopher said. He shook his head. Was he some sort of foolish parrot? “This cannot be. Amelia is not one to make such a commitment and then revoke her word. Is she?” He found himself doubting his own words.
Mr. Parker gave a sad shake to his head. “Sadly, she takes after both of my sisters. I take it you have met Eleanor?”
Christopher nodded, so stunned he could not speak.
“She conspires against my family at every turn. She is jealous, angry at the fortune that she lost because of her choice in who to marry. She left our home many years ago in shame, and now my niece has done the same.”
Christopher thought he would be sick. Had all that Amelia told him been a lie? Well, she did say she was a servant when he met her, which apparently had not been a lie. And even when she played his wife for his father’s benefit, she had not disavowed him of that reality.
Yet, later she had led him to believe she was actually a lady come to Rumsbury to live with an aunt who would introduce her to society. It was no wonder his feelings for her were in such chaos!
When his eyes fell on the man across from him, a man known to be one of the wealthiest men in England, Christopher saw no reason why he would lie. Amelia, on the other hand, had every reason.
“What are your plans concerning Amelia?” Christopher asked. “Am I to hand her over to you, or perhaps to the men you hired to hunt her down?” The idea of Amelia hunted only churned his stomach more. None of this could be true! Yet, why would it not be?
“No,” Mr. Parker said with a smirk. “You will not be required to do anything. I simply became concerned when I heard that the two of you had become close. She will ruin your family’s name once the truth comes out. Mark my words.”
Christopher went to speak, but Mr. Parker forestalled him.
“The man to whom she is engaged is to collect her here in Rumsbury. Just imagine the damage such a scandal would do to your family name once word gets out that you have been courting a woman who is not only already engaged to another, but who she truly is. All the honor your father has built will be destroyed, and all because of the type of woman Amelia is.”
No! None of what Mr. Parker said was true! Amelia was the woman with whom he wanted to spend the rest of his life, and nothing this man could say would change that. “And what type of woman is she?” he demanded as he rose from his
seat, anger now filling him.
“She is a bastard,” Mr. Parker replied without hesitation. “She has lived the life of a servant and lies to everyone she meets. I admit it breaks my heart that we share the same blood.” He, too, rose from his seat. “If you do wish to help me, then urge the girl to return home and honor her promise. If she will not do it for me, perhaps there is enough decency in her to do it for you.” He clasped Christopher on the shoulder. “May your father’s health improve,” he said with a pitying smile. “I will see myself out.”
Christopher stood in shock as the man walked out the door. The room spun around him as he tried to make sense of what he had just learned. He downed the remainder of his brandy and poured himself another, which he also drank in one gulp.
He thought of the story that Amelia had told him and compared it to what Mr. Parker had just said. Both spoke of a woman escaping a home and a marriage that Amelia did not want. What was different was how she had found herself in that situation. The tale her uncle had told made much more sense than what Amelia had shared with him. Plus, what reason did Mr. Parker have to lie to him? It was not as if the man had anything to lose from telling such a story.
Then an image of Amelia appeared in his mind. From the moment they met, she had been nothing more than a contradiction. She wore a burlap dress that made her to be a woman of the lower class, but her speech and mannerisms were that of the upper. Her aunt had confirmed that Amelia had lied when he found them shopping for new dresses, which supported Mr. Parker’s story all the more.
They were both liars! Aunt and niece alike! And he had been the brunt of those falsehoods all along.
He nearly spilled the brandy as he poured himself another glass. Lilias had been wrong; Amelia was like other women. No, she was not like them. She was far worse!
Chapter Twenty-Four
Amelia awoke Tuesday morning with great anticipation for the day. Christopher would be calling over again, and this time she would tell him truthfully what she felt for him. A love had grown in her heart, and it was the night before as she lay in bed that she came to this realization. How could she not be? They had shared their hearts with one another — without judgment. What man destined to become an earl would accept a woman such as she? A servant. She wanted nothing more than to spend her life with the man.
Vows of Honor: Secrets of Scarlett Hall Book 6 Page 17