by R. J. Moray
Jack hesitated. “You like it, right? I don’t want you to do it just to make me happy.”
“What if doing it just to make you happy is what I like about it?” Channon asked, because, well it kind of was.
Jack’s mouth thinned. “Is it?”
“Part of it. But…also, it’s dirty.”
Jack smiled. “And you like that about it.”
“I really do.”
If he’d had his way, Channon would have gone to sleep there on Jack’s chest, but Jack made him get up, made him shower, made him find his clothes and put them in the hamper. Channon sighed and pouted but that was all, and eventually they were back in bed, clean and naked and wrapped up in one another.
In the dark, Channon sighed. “Alice said I was just a thing you use for your pleasure. And I know that’s not…I mean sometimes it’s true. But I like that. Feeling like your toy, just a piece of property you could do anything with.”
“No,” Jack said, kissing Channon’s mouth, his cheek, stroking his jaw and squeezing him close. “My prized possession.”
“My Sir,” Channon agreed, reaching up to run his fingers through Jack’s hair. “Just mine.”
He could hear Jack’s smile in his voice. “Just yours,” Jack said, like it was the one thing in the world he was certain of. And Channon felt it too, because it was true.
Epilogue
Jack found it impossible to leave Channon alone in the morning. He knew he was being a nuisance, hanging over Channon’s shoulders while Channon made breakfast, kissing him too much, touching him every chance he got.
But he wanted to. Things between them had changed. Not just last night but over the past few months. Or the last year. Channon had changed, and that was to be expected. He was growing up, into a man Jack hoped would still love him. And Jack had changed too, felt his sense of self shift in response to this boy who loved him now, someone who made him want to be the man Channon believed he was.
The relationship itself had changed. Things Jack hadn’t known he could have in the first place had become a part of his life. He’d lived the last ten years—no, maybe always—not really believing he could be with someone in this way. He’d wanted it, sure, but when he’d realized he wasn’t the kind of person to be content with a ‘normal’ relationship he’d thought all of this was barred to him. Someone who loved him, fiercely. Someone he loved so much it made him want to do crazy things. Like throw away the business he’d spent so long building. Like settle down, buy a house, fill it with children who would get in the way of the lifestyle he’d been living all this time.
God, Channon made him think things. Like what it could be like to grow old with someone, to feel secure in the knowledge that they would always be there. To want to work on the problems that life threw their way, and keep trying even when things were hard.
He wanted it. He wanted Channon. Had he just been waiting for the right person all this time? Or was it simply that Channon was worth it? The perfect match for him. Someone to treasure.
It didn’t matter, he realized, watching Channon strip down to his skin for a morning dip in the pool. Whatever the reason, they were here now, and Jack didn’t want to lose this perfect thing, even if it got hard later.
So, when Channon came in from his swim, Jack pulled him down onto the sofa and said, “We never really talked about kids.”
Channon slicked his wet hair out of his eyes, his skin pale with the autumn chill. “What about them?”
“If you want children with me, one day, then that’s something we can do.” Jack took a deep breath, knowing that whatever Channon said he would be content to know the answer. “If you don’t, then it’s not a deal breaker. And you can change your mind, if you want. I want you to know that I’m open to the possibility, and that there is no-one in the world I would rather do that with than you.”
Channon smiled. It was soft and shy, and so warm Jack wanted to kiss into it. But he didn’t, making himself wait to hear what Channon would say.
“That sounds non-urgent,” Channon said. He touched Jack’s cheek with cold fingers, his eyes so bright and so green. “But, so you know, Sir, if I was going to do it? I’d want it to be with you.”
Good enough. Best it could get, really. Jack did kiss him then, feeling something give in his chest.
“Then let’s leave it for now,” Jack told him. “No rush.”
“You’re always right, Sir,” Channon said, and Jack hoped he could live up to that, for as long as Channon needed him to.
Did you like this book?
Please leave a review!
Dear Reader,
This was an interesting episode to write. On the one hand, Channon's doing better at handling his anxieties. On the other, he keeps having them. And a new kink for Jack! Silly man, he's not even forty yet, there's plenty of time for new kinks.
If you want to do me a huge favour, you can leave a review. Alternatively, you can email me ([email protected]) or follow me on twitter @robinmoray, tumblr, facebook, and at my website, where you'll find my blog and other fun stuff.
Until next time,
❤ Robin
P.S. Would you like a free story? Join my mailing list for updates, new releases, and free stuff, and get a download of my exclusive subscribers-only short story Collision Course.
About the Author
Robin Moray started writing at the age of twelve. Those stories tended to have a lot of elves in them, and woodland rangers who were secretly exiled princes. Robin spent years in academia, studying literature and history, and then embarked on a career in the private sector, playing with spreadsheets and day-dreaming of adventures with wolves and witches and magical pacts. Robin's first book, Bonded to the Alpha, was written in two months but benefited from nearly twenty years of practice. Since then Robin has been devoted to writing fantasy, horror, science fiction, and romance, in all kinds of combinations.
You can find Robin in the following places:
robinmoray.com
Amazon
Goodreads
Twitter @robinmoray
Tumblr
Facebook
[email protected]
❤
Thanks for reading!
See you next time!