Title Page
EDWARD’S EXPLOITS
Jacqueline M. Wilson
Illustrations by
June Burton
Publisher Information
First published in 2004 by
Apex Publishing Ltd
PO Box 7086, Clacton on Sea, Essex, CO15 5WN, England
www.apexpublishing.co.uk
Digital Edition converted and distributed in 2011 by
Andrews UK Limited
www.andrewsuk.com
Copyright © 2004 by Jacqueline M. Wilson
The author has asserted her moral rights
All rights reserved.
This book is sold subject to the condition that no part of this book is to be reproduced, in any shape or form, or, by way of trade, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, be lent, re-sold, hired out or otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition, including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser, without prior permission of the copyright holder.
Cover Design Illustration by June Burton
Edward Goes On Holiday
Edward was packing his suitcase, he had put in his best shorts and hat
Eric the fox was going to feed his goldfish, so he left the key under the mat
He made some jam sandwiches and took his train guide
Edward was off on holiday, off to the seaside.
He was very excited on the train and fidgeted most of the way
The other passengers were getting fed up with him, so he thought of a game to play
He counted all the brown cows he could see, now this really was fun
The game didn’t last long, it was getting boring, he’d counted a hundred and one!
At last the train pulled into the station at platform number five
His auntie had been waiting for his train to arrive
She greeted him enthusiastically with a hug and a kiss on the cheek
She was cuddling him so tightly Edward felt his legs go weak!
In the car on the way back they chatted and laughed about
About when Edward was young, how he and his brother had made a raft
They had taken it to the river and jumped on board ready to sail the seas
Their adventure was cut short, the raft sank and the water was up to their knees!
At last they arrived at aunt Kate’s house, Edward went to find his uncle Ted
He was at the back of the house painting his rowing boat white and red
Edward helped his uncle paint until his tummy started to rumble
Just at that point aunt Kate came out and said “who’s for apple crumble?”
Not only was there apple crumble but scones, chocolate cake and home made bread
Edward had never seen so much food, his eyes nearly popped out his head!
He ate as much as he possibly could, then he ate a little bit more!
He would really have to stop now, his tummy was getting very sore
He went outside and played in the sand, with his bucket and spade
And built the biggest and best sandcastle he had ever made
He ran in and out of the sea and jumped over the waves
Then went walking across the rocks and looked in the old caves.
Edward loved to explore, but the caves were dark and he was a bit wary
What if he should meet a spider that was big, black and hairy!
He collected funny shaped stones and shells even though they did smell
He found the shell of a dead crab and put that in his pail as well.
It was getting dark and getting late, it was nearly time for bed
He would be glad to climb under the covers and rest his weary head
He saw the light in the distance, what a welcoming sight
He said goodnight to his aunt and uncle and went out like a light.
The next few days were spent playing on the rocks and on the shore
Having adventures in the caves, he wasn’t worried about spiders any more
He would pretend to be a famous explorer, a pirate or sometimes a buccaneer
Who would always be the hero of the story and never show fear.
People would speak to him as they passed by and some would even smile
But when he dug up a dead crab, or bones of a fish some of them ran a mile!
Edward had loved his holiday and didn’t really want to leave
He had been there seven days which he found hard to believe.
As he waited to board the train, his aunt and uncle said goodbye
Edward felt all sad inside and thought he was going to cry
“Don’t feel sad Edward” auntie said as she wiped away a tear
“We have enjoyed having you, please come back next year.”
Edward’s New Friend
Edward was in a playful mood, he was looking for animals to harass
When all of a sudden, he saw something moving in the grass
Edward was a bit of a coward, should he go over there?
He didn’t know if he was brave enough, or even if he dare.
What if it should bite him, that had happened to him before
He still remembered that, it really was rather sore
A little animal with sharp teeth, had bitten his big toe
But curiosity was getting the better of him, he really had to know.
He lay down on his tummy and slithered like a snake
So it wouldn’t see him, but Edward had made a big mistake
Edward was a rabbit and rabbits have big ears
So all the other animals could see him including the tigers and the deers.
The other animals were used to Edward and never batted an eye
It was probably a game like hide and seek or maybe even eye-spy
Little did they realise Edward was on a mission, with a mystery to solve
Undertaking an investigation and all that would involve.
Edward was nearly at the spot and was trying to find a smell
Of the newcomer’s whereabouts and all was going well
When all of a sudden a head popped through a hole in the ground
It was black, with a large bill and wearing glasses; Edward didn’t make a sound
His heart was racing, he jumped back totally in shock
He landed in a big heap and banged his toe on a rock
He recovered quickly and jumped to his feet prepared to take a stance
When the little voice said “hi, my names Lance”.
Lance crawled out and held out his claw for Edward to shake
“I’m sorry to startle you, do you fancy a piece of cake”?
“Definitely, yes” said Edward returning the shake and following Lance down the hole
It was quite large inside with tables and chairs made of stone and coal.
They ate cake and sandwiches too, Lance told Edward about his plight
Of how he became lost in the jungle because of his poor eyesight
He was digging in a garden in Epping, when his bearings he lost
The directions mum had given him were wrong, they must have their wires crossed.
Edward felt sorry for Lance and wanted to help, but wasn’t sure what to do
Maybe he c
ould ask owl to soar up high and get a full view
Of the surrounding areas and see if he could find
Lance’s mum somewhere nearby, or even some of his own kind.
Owl listened to their story and Lance became excited
Owl had promised him they would be reunited
She searched high and low and finally spotted her in a valley
She swooped down and said “are you Lance’s mum”? she said “yes, please call me Sally”
“I have been worried sick” she said “I want to give him a cuddle”
“he never was very good at reading maps, he always gets in a muddle”
They were delighted to see each other, mum said he would have to take map reading classes
Or if he didn’t think he could do that, she’d get him stronger glasses!
“We have to get going, I have left the rest of the family behind”
She thanked Edward and owl and said they were very kind
Owl said farewell and left them to say goodbye
Edward had a lump in his throat and thought he was going to cry.
“Goodbye Edward thanks for all your help, I’m, sorry about your toe”
“Goodbye Lance I’m glad you’re my friend and not my foe”
Edward would miss Lance more than he would admit
But he still had other friends, and he ran off to tell them all about it.
Edward’s Loft
Edward was busy clearing out his loft
It was so dusty up there he spluttered and coughed
There were cobwebs and spiders, dirt and a horrible smell
It made him feel sick and not at all well
He never came up here, now he knew why
It was all dusty and smelly, like a pigsty!
He had on his blue overalls, boots, gloves and a mask
Now he was all kitted out and ready for the task.
He was going to be ruthless and not keep a thing
Until he found a little toy soldier with a gun that went PING
He remembered that little soldier, it had given him great pleasure
He would give it to some other little rabbit for them to treasure.
All was going well he had made a good start
He had thrown out a burst ball and a robot that had fallen apart
Then he spotted his old castle complete with a moat
And just behind that, he saw his sailing boat!
Edward had forgotten all about these great toys
That both he and his brother played with, when they were boys
How he loved and missed those days, the toys had made him think
He was very hot and sweaty and headed downstairs for a drink.
He had only thrown two things away, and only because they were broke
He would have to try harder, he finished off his coke
He went upstairs again and put in the bag an incomplete game
He lifted something green, it was his school coat and inside was his name.
Edward Benjamin Joseph Brown it said on a very large tag
And right beside it was of course, his old school bag!
He looked inside there were his books, they looked a bit rotten
He wouldn’t look at his maths book, some things were best forgotten!
He was cracking on now and managed to clear a space
Just then he noticed some cars they used to race
He was always the blue car, his brother always the red
They would always end up crashing the cars, and getting sent to bed!
Those were the days Edward thought, it was getting late he decided he’d had enough
He had done a very good job and got rid of lots of stuff
Although he did keep a few things from which he couldn’t detach
Edward took all his priceless possessions and closed the loft hatch.
Edward Needs Glasses
Edward was walking through the forest talking to Frank the hare
When suddenly he fell down a big hole in the ground, which gave Frank a scare
He pulled Edward out and asked him if he was alright
Edward said he was fine, but hadn’t seen the hole because of the bright sunlight.
They walked further along the path, Edward turned his head to invite Frank to tea
“WATCH OUT”! Frank shouted as Edward banged his head on a tree
“OUCH”! yelled Edward and rubbed the red bump on his head
“Lets go inside and I’ll bathe it for you” Frank said.
Edward went upstairs to fetch the antiseptic and cotton wool
But when he looked at the label he felt such a fool
“I think my eyes need testing” Edward said
for he had not brought down the antiseptic but mouthwash instead!
Edward was a bit worried he had never had his eyes tested before
It was just as well Frank came with him as he almost walked into the door
The lady in reception was very nice and made Edward feel at ease
She told him to take a seat and that her name was Louise.
A lady appeared from a door marked ‘Private’ and was given Edward’s details
She looked very stern and he noticed she had black painted finger nails
CRIKEY! gasped Edward she looked like a witch, he tugged at Frank’s arm
“Come in with me please” as he held tight a gold button which he kept as a lucky charm.
He sat in a chair and stared at a chart on the wall
Which had big letters at the top, but the letters at the bottom were small
The letters were very fuzzy and a bit of a blur
He wondered if he should tell the optician, but he was still a bit scared of her.
She finished what she was doing and gave him a little smile
“Now just relax Edward, this might take a little while”
She asked him questions about his health and did he get headaches?
Couldn’t she see the huge bump on his head for goodness sakes!
She asked him to look ahead and read the letters from the top
And when he couldn’t make out the letters any more he could stop
Edward did as he was told but struggled on the third line
She told him to carry on and that he was doing fine.
But Edward couldn’t carry on, that was all he could see
In fact, he wasn’t even sure if he was looking at a B or a G!
She put some funny glasses on him and asked if that was better
If definitely was, he could now see the fourth line and almost every letter.
She changed the lenses from thick to thin
And asked if it was better or worse for him
She shone a small torch into his eyes and told him not to look at the light
The light was very distracting because it was so close and so bright.
The optician told Edward he needed glasses and wrote a prescription
The writing was unreadable like hieroglyphics or even Egyptian
There were many frames to choose from, should he go for one of the designer names?
But in the end he chose a small gold pair with oval shaped frames.
When Edward’s glasses were ready for him to try
He looked out of the window at the trees and the passers by
Edward was AMAZED at how clear everything was and no longer a blur
He thanked the not so scary optician and said goodbye to her.
They left the shop but Edward felt queer
He wasn’t quite used to the glasses yet and everything seemed so
near
He held onto Frank’s arm until he felt steady
Then they started for home when Edward was ready.
Edward was worried in case everyone would stare
But no one seem to notice his new eye wear
He could now see things as clear as day
And the two young friends hopped off to play.
Edward’s Day Trip to London
Eric, Frank, Fergus and Mary had arranged to meet Edward at the Station
They had been planning this day for months, London was their destination
They were going to catch the 9.28
And if Edward didn’t hurry up he was going to be late.
They paced the platform impatiently, up and down
“Edward’s always late” said Fergus the frog with a frown
“he’s probably forgotten” Eric said buttoning up his coat
“he forgets everything unless he writes himself a note”
“One of us will have to go to his house”
“I’ll go, it’ll be quicker for me” said Mary the mouse
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