by M. B. Feeney
"She’s confused about how your cousin feels." I should have known she'd tell him. Jenny told it like it was.
"There's no need to be confused, darlin'. Anyone just has to take one look at him to see he's in deep."
There was no way I could respond to that without being told off for putting myself down or sounding smug.
"I don't give it long before he's announcing it to the media."
I snorted. "Yeah. Okay, Wade." I was going to say something else but was distracted by Gage taking hold of my hand. "Hey."
His whole face lit up when he smiled. "Are you even hungry?" he asked.
"Not particularly. Why?"
Instead of answering me, he called out goodbyes to the others before dragging me into a taxi that seemed to have appeared out of nowhere. The sounds of catcalls and wolf whistles followed us as we drove off.
“Where are we goi-"
He cut off my words with a kiss that took my breath away, his tongue plunging into my mouth.
This was no soft kiss. This was full of ‘I fucking missed you’ passion and longing. After what felt like an eternity, he pulled away, his eyes dark and sparkling.
The taxi driver’s gruff voice interrupted us. "'Ere, ain't you that geezer what’s gonna be in that angel film?"
"Er. . . Yeah." Gage rolled his eyes at me.
"I fought you was with that Helena bird."
I burst out laughing.
"That would be the other one. Jack Hixton, the lead."
"Oh, you all look the same to me, mate."
Gage looked horrified, but I couldn’t stop laughing. I was sure I'd hate being mistaken for a gangly, skinny dude with weird hair, too, but the glare Gage sent me just made my fit of the giggles even worse.
"Here we are." The cabbie pulled up outside a small but decent-looking hotel.
Gage handed him a note, and we got out. When I felt the atmosphere change between us, the last of my laughter subsided. The air became charged with sexual tension.
"Calmed down, have we?" Gage asked, almost setting me off again.
He took my hand and led me inside, and I rolled my eyes at the sultry looks the female desk clerk threw at Gage while he collected his room key. She frowned at our entwined hands.
"Come on." He led me to the lift, and as soon as the doors slid closed, his hands clasped my hips and he looked deep into my eyes. "Promise me something." His tone was serious.
"What?" I was nervous all of a sudden.
"Never stop speaking to me again. It's killed me these last few weeks not being able to talk to you."
I melted. "I think I can keep that promise. It killed me, too." Capturing his bottom lip with my mouth, I ran my tongue along it until he moaned, turning my legs to turn to jelly.
I couldn’t stop myself from apologising again when we came up for air. "I really am sorry for jumping to conclusions."
Gage laughed gently as the lift arrived at his floor. He led me along the corridor, coming to a stop outside his room.
"This is kind of new to me, too, you know."
"What is?"
"Falling so hard and fast for someone. I'm not going to lie. I slept with fans after shows before, but that was just an outlet for. . . I'm not exactly sure, but I-"
I pressed a finger to his lips. "Look, I know you're no angel.”
He groaned at the unintentional comparison, making me laugh.
“You're living the rock star life, and I never expected you to be snow white and virginal. I know I'm not. The past doesn't bother me at all." I trailed off, not sure what I was trying to say and worrying that it was beginning to sound like I’d expected to hook up with him in Texas.
"I just wanted you to know that it's been a while since I've even considered a relationship, and now I find myself in one that means the world to me. Ever since I knocked you on your ass, I haven't been able to get you out of my head. I did try, more for your sake than mine, but I just couldn't. You've captured both my mind and . . ." He took both my hands into his. "And my heart."
I couldn’t do anything other than stare at him. Before I could verbalise any kind of response, Gage turned away from me and unlocked the door.
"Come on. I don't enjoy having these conversations in a hallway." He let me go in before him, his hand on the small of my back. The room was nothing special, but it was nice enough. Not the cleanest, but hey. Boys.
"What kind of conversation is this?" I asked once we were in private. Gage paced up and down the room for a bit, running his hand through his hair. "Stop doing that. No wonder the cabbie mistook you for ‘Prixton’." I sniggered at the online nickname for his co-star.
"That's not nice. He's an okay guy."
I raised an eyebrow.
“He is, I swear.”
"What can I say? Not a fan. He's not my type."
Cue a raised eyebrow in return. "Oh yeah? And what is your type?"
"Well, I like my men a bit more . . . Southern." I grinned at him.
"Well, ma'am, I just may be able to hook you up there." Gage walked over to where I sat on the side unit. He positioned himself between my legs, much like he’d done in my kitchen. Reaching up, he slid the beanie off my head "This needs to go. Sorry. It looks gorgeous on you and all, but no girl of mine is going to walk around in one of Prixton's grimy hats."
"Your girl, huh? I'm hardly a girl."
"But, you are mine, all mine." The statement came out sounding like territorial anger, but it just made me feel very wanted and desired.
"So. . . No beanies?"
He stepped away and walked across the room, my body instantly missing the closeness. I watched while he rummaged through the wardrobe for something.
"No beanies, but this is allowed." Gage held up the returned fedora, manoeuvring himself back into the space between my legs and placing it on my head. "So much better."
"So this is more acceptable for me to wear when seen on the arm of a southern gent? It doesn't really go with my outfit. Plus, I really like that beanie." I pouted a little. Without saying a word, Gage leaned in and took my bottom lip gently between his teeth and sucked on it before letting it go.
"Well, if you like it so much, I guess I could let it go, now and then."
"Now and then, huh? What's that supposed to mean?"
"Well, I wouldn't want to mess up your outfit now would I?" Gage knew just what he was doing when he smiled, making my breath hitch.
"Regular ‘Gok Wan’ aren't you?"
"That sounds kinda rude. Can we try that?"
I burst out laughing. "Channelling Matt and Karina, are we?"
He rolled his eyes at me. "Like anyone would even want to do that. I can’t begin to understand how those two work, but they do. I'm just feeling more than a bit smug that he's managed to fall for the one girl that can keep him in place."
"Not that I'm not enjoying it, but why are we talking about Matt and Karina? We're alone, and I have to leave for home tomorrow afternoon. Plus, I distinctly remember you saying something about not having conversations in corridors."
"I think I might have meant 'important' conversations." Gage grinned, "Admit it, you think they're as entertaining as I do."
"I’m sure I could think of something a little more interesting than that."
It felt uncomfortable bringing it up again, but I couldn’t help myself. I needed to be clear on where we stood.
"Oh, really?" He quirked an eyebrow at me, "And what would that be?"
"What you were saying earlier . . ." Feeling awkward, I trailed off, unsure if I was pressing the matter too much. "About the things I've captured." Looking up at him, I took a deep and shaky breath through my nose, "Or more appropriately, the things I don't think I want to let go."
The small smile that lit up his face was something I hadn't expected to see at my words. An expression of surprise, perhaps, or of stunned amusement, but this was something else. This was perfect.
"Are you saying you-"
He leaned forward and kissed me,
his lips soft and gentle against mine, cutting off my words.
"I think I am. Somehow it feels right to say it, regardless of how long we've known each other." Lifting my hands, I ran my fingers through his hair, my nails scraping gently against his scalp. "Does time really matter? In all honesty?"
The serious look in his eyes made my breath catch in my throat.
"I mean, when you know, you know. Know what I mean?"
In all the videos of interviews I’d seen of him online, I’d never once seen him tongue-tied. It was endearing.
"Yeah, I do." I couldn't believe I was having this conversation with someone I’d lusted after like a schoolgirl for the last four years. It felt so surreal, but somehow right at the same time. I could feel Gage's fingers stroking my lower back just under my top. Years of playing guitar had roughened his fingertips, making the sensation feel fantastic and sensual.
"The last few weeks have been shit. I was so close to turning up on your doorstep, but Becky put a stop to that idea."
His forehead furrowed into a slight frown at the mention of the band’s manager. Leaning forward, I kissed the lines that marked his smooth skin.
"Stop. I feel guilty enough as it is. I hate to imagine you thinking that way, because I’m a total tool." He pulled my chin down so that we were eye to eye.
"It doesn't matter anymore. We're here . . . Alone." He kissed my lips again. "And there's a large bed going to waste right behind me." I peered over his shoulder.
"I do believe you're right." None too gently, I used his hair to pull his face back to mine and kissed him with every ounce of passion and feeling I could muster. After a split second, Gage returned the kiss with just as much fervour. Without breaking contact, he gathered me in his arms, walked over to the bed, and lay me down. He crawled up my body, one hand gliding up my side until it cupped my neck, the other holding his weight above me.
"Well, now I have you where I want you. Where I need you." He spoke as he hovered, his face above mine, tantalisingly close. "What am I going to do with you?"
I sat in the staff room at work checking my emails on my phone and couldn't help but smile at one from Jenny telling me about her new flat and how she was getting it ready for her daughter and her mum to join her in a few days. She was looking forward to being with them again and had promised to bring them up when she got a break in pre-production, since her daughter Ali wanted to meet the kids after chatting to them via video chat.
"Hey, Charlotte."
My teaching assistant, Mia, sat next to me with a cup of coffee. I tucked my phone away and turned to her.
"Did you have a good weekend?"
The grin that spread across my face was hard to hide as I thought back to my time in London.
"Oh, what is that all about? You've met someone, haven't you?"
"Oh, look at the time. I need to get back. Lunch is nearly finished." Standing up, I attempted to ignore her laughter.
"At least tell me he's gorgeous."
She stood, and we walked back to the classroom together. I turned to her, my smile wider.
"Like you wouldn't believe." I went outside to gather my class.
Once the school day had finished and I had fed and bathed the kids, I sat at my desk catching up with some planning, letting my mind travel back to the weekend and Gage’s hotel room.
Gage tugged at the hem of my top gently. I sat up, allowing him to pull it over my head. I couldn't help but laugh when he flung it over his shoulder with a flourish. My fingers were steady while I made short work of his shirt buttons, revealing his bare chest, which was only marred by his ink. Pushing him onto his back, I ran my tongue up from his belly button to one of his nipples, which I took between my teeth. The moan that erupted from him was animalistic and made me want to rip his clothes off and straddle him, but I was determined to take things slow and really make the most of it. Neither of us knew when we'd get the chance to be together again once I was back at work and the band’s UK tour was over.
Watching me, propped up on his elbows with a lazy smile on his face while I undid his belt and unbuttoned his jeans. Once I’d removed his clothing, he sat up and leaned forward, smiling wider at the way my body bent back to accommodate him until I was the one lying down. I couldn't help but grin at the feeling of his weight on top of me. He raised himself up onto his palms and looked down at me, his eyes boring into mine.
"Hey, darlin'."
Even from such a simple phrase, I felt my knees fall part just a little bit, and I bit down on my bottom lip like an absolute fool.
"Hey, yourself." I hoped it sounded as sexy to him as he had to me.
Without another sound, he lowered his lips to mine and took my breath away. What followed was a slow exploration of each other's bodies with slow kisses, longer touches, and lingering hands that refused to let go. Within minutes, we were both completely naked. I couldn't believe this was mine and mine alone, at least for a little while.
With another shift, he was kneeling between my legs, ghosting his hands up my thighs but refusing to touch me where I wanted him to do. After I endured a few passes up my inner thighs, my hands covered his, lifting them to my shoulders. Then I pulled myself up to my knees to mirror his position.
My hands lifted to cup his face, and I pulled his lips to mine, feeling the rumble of a moan when he began to respond to the slow, deep kiss.
"Sit back, darlin," he whispered. "I want to make you feel good." His hand brushed up and down my ribs, and I nodded. At once, his fingers disappeared. I missed the warmth of his skin but heard the familiar sound of a foil packet being opened, and soon his hands were back at the top of my legs.
The feeling of him pressing between my legs would always be something I would never forget, no matter how many days, weeks, or months passed by. Slowly, he pushed all the way inside me, and I could feel every inch of his slow moving body.
"You okay?" he whispered, and my answering nod gave him permission to move. His body covered mine, and almost carefully he brought his hands up to touch every inch of me he could reach.
His fingertips brushed across my breasts, circling, caressing, and tweaking, until my head was pressed back so hard into the pillow I thought my neck would snap.
"God, that feels so-" Without finding a word to describe it, I instead raised my hand and ran my nails down his back until his eyes rolled back and his low moans filled the hotel room.
"Fucking perfection," he whispered, his hand travelling down between our bodies to press against my clit, rubbing in slow circles while I felt my body start to tighten. "All mine, too." He murmured the words into my neck, and I gave a low whimper when he nipped at my neck.
"All yours." My chest tightened then, and I couldn't breathe while an intense warmth spread from tip to toe and I screamed out his name. His voice joined mine as he reached his climax, letting himself go deep inside of me.
Gage rested his head on my chest while we both fought to catch our breath.
"Always yours." I whispered and kissed the top of his head, peace and belonging washing over me.
"I hope so."
He lifted his head and looked at me, his beautiful eyes sparkling.
My days blended into a mundane routine of getting kids to school, going to work, coming home. Rinse and repeat. Whenever the kids were at their dad's and I didn't have alpine-size mountains of work to get through, I chatted with the girls online. Like most fans, I kept an eye on the Internet, tracking the band’s tour. They would be in the UK for only another couple of weeks, but due to work, I wasn't able to travel across the country get to any more shows.
Gage and I had agreed to stay in regular contact. To save our phone bills, I introduced him to the world of video chat. It was ridiculous how technophobic he was. Once he'd come to grips with it, I even managed to get him to install the app on his phone so he wouldn't have to go looking for a computer whenever he wanted to talk. On the nights he didn't have a gig, we would talk for a couple of hours while I, being a multitas
king pro, got on with my work.
The first night the kids were at Dermot’s, I had no unfinished work and no motivation to do anything productive, so I sat on the sofa to follow the Lyricist news online. I was waiting for Karina to get home so we could instant message. We were overdue one of our weird conversations. My phone beeped, and I answered it quickly, thinking it would be Gage.
Just saw BEST interview. Will link you when online in 5 Kx
I replied with an ‘okay’ and went to make myself a cup of tea, lighting a cigarette while I waited for the kettle to boil. My phone beeped again.
What you wearing? Gx
That's a rather personal question Cx
I think I can get away with it, don't you? Gx
Oh, I don't know. Would it be worth my while to divulge this information?
Well, that would depend on said information.
So paint splattered jogging bottoms and a moth eaten t-shirt wouldn't gain goodies?
That would depend on if this information was reliable and correct.
Oh, you want the truth? I'm wearing my pj's and thick socks.
I made my cup of tea and sat back at the computer, turning on some music and waiting rather impatiently for Karina to log on.
That is much better. What would you say if I said I was just wearing my boots and a smile?
*thud*
Karina's name popped up once she logged in, and I typed out my usual greeting while I waited for Gage's reply.
Do I need to perform mouth to mouth?
Oh God! Maybe I should spend more time away from him if he got playful like this.
I think it may be required after that visual.
Karina had posted a link in our chat, so I clicked on it and was surprised to see the logo for a long-running teen music show come up on the screen. She did know we weren't teenagers anymore, didn't she? When I posed the question, she told me to stop bitching and watch it, so I did. Fifteen minutes later, I sat open mouthed with no idea what to say or think.