“So how are you gonna get your hair cut?”
“Whoa! Who said anything about cutting my hair?”
“Oh, I don’t know. I just thought you might want a change. Like a new look, you know? I’m going to get mine cropped. Jennifer Hall had hers done two weeks ago. It’s awesome.”
“No way is anybody going to cut my hair!” Kara glanced into the mirror on her dresser, but instead of her own image, Laura Anderson’s blond bob flashed into her mind.
Kara shivered. Did she dare cut off her hair? What would Dad say? Hadn’t he always told her she could wear her hair and clothes any way she wanted? Within limits, sure. But getting a haircut was no big deal. Once again her mind flashed a picture of Laura. And Jennifer Hall had been prom queen two years in a row.
She took a deep breath. “Okay, you’re on!”
Tia looked at her like she was on fire. “You mean, you’ll do it?”
Kara nodded and held out her hand. “Lead me to the slaughter.”
Tia giggled. “Tomorrow morning. Nine o’clock. Be there.”
Tia’s mom honked the horn at eight-thirty the next morning. Kara swallowed the last bite of toast, grabbed her backpack, and sprinted out the door.
A few minutes later she watched as Tia’s dark brown hair fell around her, landing in heaps on the floor. When the stylist brought out the clippers, Kara cringed, but Tia just giggled, then grinned into the mirror. Her hair was shaped shorter in back, long enough on the sides to swish when she bent her head forward or moved it side to side.
“Wow. I’m gonna like this. I feel ten pounds lighter.” She hopped out of the chair. “Your turn. Come on, Kara, you’re gonna love it.”
Kara suddenly felt dizzy. It wasn’t too late; she could still back out. Her knees felt about as strong as Play-Doh, so she sat while the stylist undid her braid and brushed out her long, black hair. It fell to her waist even when she pulled it over her shoulder.
A whole new image. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. She could picture the look on Colin’s face when he smoothed the long, slender braid at the dance. “You look like an Indian princess,” he had said. She opened her eyes and saw the stylist frowning at her in the mirror.
“Are you sure you want to do this?”
Kara shook her head. The woman smiled. “Tell you what. We’ll just put it up like this.” She twisted the hair into a swirling mass on top of Kara’s head. She pinned it into place and pulled several long strands free, curling them into spirals against Kara’s neck and cheeks.
Half a can of hair spray later, Kara took the hand mirror and studied the results. The mirror reflected a young woman—suave, sophisticated, and looking several years older than fifteen. She smiled. “Rodeo City, here I come.”
“It’s awesome, Kara.” Tia flashed her bright red nails in the direction of the sidewalk. “Let’s go to Henry’s for lunch. My treat.”
“No way. I can pay for my own. Dad gave me a check for the work I’ve done this summer.” She suddenly felt adventuresome, free. And she was beginning to like the tendrils of hair brushing against her cheeks.
“Why don’t we go to The Hut instead? Maybe we’ll see some of the gang from school,” Kara said.
“All right. Maybe Trevor will be there.” Tia flashed her a sneaky grin.
Kara laughed. “Yeah, maybe he will. And maybe he’ll go with the youth group to Rodeo City. And maybe Devon Andrews will tag along with you.”
Tia’s mom picked them up in front of the beauty shop at three o’clock. They drove slowly past the fields and farms on the outskirts of Lariat. The road curved uphill into patches of evergreen trees, many of them blackened and bare from last year’s fire.
When they came to the curve where her mother’s car had gone off the road, Kara forced herself to look away. She didn’t need to spoil her good mood. Anyway, Mom wasn’t down there in those woods. She was safe in heaven.
Mom had told her about that from the time she was old enough to listen. “If you believe that Jesus is God, that He died for your sins and rose again, then you don’t have to be afraid to die.” And she did believe. She had accepted that gift a long time ago.
At the funeral Pastor Taylor had told them, “The Bible says we will grieve, but not like those who have no hope.” She could almost feel the pressure of his hand on her shoulder. “You have hope, Wakara, because your mom belonged to God. And when she died, she went instantly into His presence.”
But what about us? We’re the ones who suffer because she’s not here.
They turned down the gravel drive and pulled up in front of the house. Kara waved a final thank you to Mrs. Sanchez and Tia, then went through the side door into the family room. Ryan had his face just inches away from the TV, watching John Wayne swagger down the main street of some dusty western town.
“Back up, Ry. You’re sitting way too close.”
He scooted back an inch, then turned to look at her. “Kara?”
He scrambled to his feet. “Whooee! Dad! Come quick.” She could still hear him hollering as he ran out of the room. “Dad! You gotta see this. Kara got beautified!”
RODEO CITY WAS SO CROWDED, the girls almost missed Trevor and Devon, who stood waiting for them just inside the door. It took an hour to get their sandwiches.
The youth leader, Mr. Andrews, warned them that only line dancing was allowed, but they could also use the pool tables and the mechanical bull.
After showing off by riding the bull a full eight seconds, Trevor threw an arm over Kara’s shoulders. “Whew, this place is jammed. What you say we vacate to somewhere a little more private?”
He winked at her, and Kara winced. He’d been coming on like that all evening, grabbing her hand and trying to kiss her. She was getting really tired of fighting him off. To make matters worse, Mr. Andrews was watching them like a hawk.
“I don’t think so.” She shrugged his arm away. “My dad’s picking us up at eleven.”
Usually she hated having Dad pick her up from parties, but tonight she was actually glad she couldn’t drive.
At five to eleven, the guys walked them outside. Kara took a deep breath. “Boy, it feels good to breathe fresh air.”
“Aren’t you cold?” Trevor slipped his arm around her shoulders again.
“Not a bit.” Kara pulled away just as her father’s dark blue Trooper turned the corner. “Look, Tia, there’s Dad. Let’s meet him on the corner so he doesn’t have to park.”
“Got ya.” Tia took Kara’s arm. “Bye, guys. Thanks for dinner. I’ll talk to you later, Dev, okay?”
Kara caught the glare in Trevor’s eyes and decided not to say anything more. Instead, she flagged down Dad, and she and Tia piled into the backseat.
“Whoa! Intense,” they said at the same time. Kara caught Dad’s frown in the rearview mirror.
He looked back at the guys standing on the sidewalk. “Everything okay, girls?”
She didn’t turn around. “Sure, Dad, we’re fine.”
She was glad when he dropped his gaze and pulled out onto the boulevard. “I saw your dad at the grange tonight, Tia. He said you could come back to Eagle Lodge with us for the last week of the season,” he said, grinning back at them. “That is, if you want to.”
Tia grabbed Kara’s arm. “Awesome! I mean, sure, Mr. Sheridan, I’d love to come—if it’s all right with Kara and everything.”
Kara rolled her eyes. “Tia, you’re a nut case. Of course I want you to come. Besides, I could use some help cleaning cabins. You can do the bathrooms.”
Kara felt happier than she had in weeks. It would be great to have Tia at the lodge. She went to bed thinking about the trails they could explore. Tia couldn’t bring Patches, of course, but Colin would find her a good horse out of the string.
Colin. Laura Anderson was gone by now. Would Colin be moping around like a love-starved calf?
Don’t be too hard on him, Wako. At least he’s not an octopus like Trevor Sanders. She shivered. If she never saw him again, it
would be too soon.
She turned on her side, cuddled her pillow, and drifted into a pleasant dream.
She and Lily were cantering across an open meadow. The wind kicked up warm, earthy smells, ruffling Lily’s mane and making her own long hair fly. Running free.
A huge, black cloud hovered over the tops of the mountains.
Great-grandmother rode beside her. She was shouting something, trying to be heard over the thunder of hooves and the roaring wind. “You are not Nez Perce.”
Wakara turned and tried to listen. But Great-grandmother no longer rode beside her. Instead, she saw Anne’s gentle smile. “Wakara is a Yana name.”
Then Dad’s face appeared in the boiling black clouds. “Don’t forget, you have Grandfather’s blood too. And your mother’s. Don’t forget, Wakara. Don’t forget your mother.”
Lightning streaked through the clouds and set her heart thudding like the thunder. Pounding. Overpowering the sound of Lily’s hooves.
Kara gasped for breath. She sat up and threw back the sheet. It was soaked with sweat. Awake. The pounding should have stopped.
She heard Dad’s door fly open. His footsteps rushing down the stairs. The front door squealed on its hinges and the incessant banging finally stopped.
She peered at the clock—2 A.M. Someone was at the door. It could only mean trouble.
She grabbed her robe and ran barefoot to the railing at the top of the stairs. The light in the entry hall was blazing. Dad was there. And Greg. And Sheriff Lassen.
Greg could hardly stand. He pulled away from the sheriff’s grip and staggered into Dad.
“Here, let me help you get him to the couch.” The sheriff grabbed the back of Greg’s shirt and hauled him toward the sofa. Greg fought them, but weakly, as Dad yanked off his boots and laid him down.
Sheriff Lassen grunted. “Drunk and disorderly. He and that group of hooligans busted up some tables over at The Pizza Pit.”
Dad looked drained. “He’s a good boy, Ray. And a hard worker. He’s just trying to stomp out his grief.”
The sheriff nodded. “I know that, Harley. That’s why I brought him home instead of throwing him in jail. When he sobers up, you tell him to do his stomping somewhere else. Next time I won’t be so generous.”
Greg struggled to sit up. He slouched on the sofa, his head hanging between his knees. When the sheriff left, Kara ran downstairs.
She could hardly bear the look in Dad’s eyes. “Want me to make some coffee?”
“No, thanks, Wakara. I’ll deal with this. You go up and check on Ryan, then get back to bed.”
Kara knew he didn’t mean to be harsh with her. But she also knew when her father expected to be obeyed.
Ryan was sleeping peacefully, hugging his pillow the same way she did. He had kicked the covers onto the floor. The room was warm, so Kara pulled just the sheet up over his bare feet.
When she passed the landing on her way back to bed, she could hear Greg’s drunken sobbing. She peered over the banister. Dad just sat there saying nothing at all.
Oh, God. What’s happening to this family? Don’t You see what a mess You caused by taking Mom away? I don’t know my brother anymore. She thought about the dream. And now, I don’t know who I am either.
KARA GROANED AND LOOKED at the clock. “8:15. I haven’t slept this late in months.”
Mom would say, “Your body must have needed it.” Kara heartily agreed. She would have liked to stay curled up another half hour or so, but the smell of fresh-perked coffee and frying bacon drew her out of bed.
She washed and pulled on yesterday’s jeans, found a clean, sleeveless cotton shirt, then followed her nose downstairs. “Hey, what gives? I could have cooked breakfast.”
Ryan was already sitting at the table chugging down a glass of orange juice. Dad was turning bacon at the stove. She had to smother a gasp of surprise when she turned and saw Greg sitting at the kitchen table.
Her brother was dressed in clean, black Wranglers, a white T-shirt, and well-polished boots. He had combed his hair, and there was a fresh razor nick on his chin. He looked sharp, except for the dark rings around his eyes. He also looked very, very sober.
“Sit down, Wakara, it’s almost ready.” Dad’s voice was quiet. His manner calm. Yet Kara could almost feel the tension in the air.
She did as she was told. Ryan chattered his way through three pieces of bacon and a scrambled egg, then swiped his napkin across his chin and pushed back from the table. “I’m gonna watch John Wayne.”
“Don’t forget to rinse your plate.” Kara spoke before he could bolt out of the room.
When Ryan had gone, Dad cleared his throat. “Wakara, please call Tia and tell her to be ready by two o’clock. We’ll pick her up. She’s not to come over beforehand.”
He pulled a piece of paper out of his shirt pocket and handed it to her. “Bud Davis will be here in a few minutes to take you to town. I want you to take Ryan and pick up these supplies. You can pack when you get home. Make it around one o’clock. Greg and I have some things to do.”
He looked at Greg. “You have something to say to your sister?”
Kara cringed, but Greg’s voice sounded sincere when he said, “Yeah. Sorry, Wakara. I didn’t mean to cause such a ruckus last night.”
Dad nodded and Greg looked back down at his plate.
Kara started gathering up the dirty dishes, but Dad’s hand on her arm stopped her. “Greg will do those. You just get yourself and Ryan ready, okay?”
She nodded and fled from the room. Oh no, what’s Dad going to do to Greg? Dad had never been anything but gentle with any of them. She couldn’t see him hitting Greg or anything like that, but whatever he had decided on for her brother’s punishment, she was glad to be out of it.
At one o’clock they came home with the supplies and Kara sent Ryan upstairs to pack. “I’ll be there in a minute.”
She wandered into the kitchen. There was a note from Dad anchored with a magnet to the fridge. “Kara, I’m watering the stock. Please be ready to go by 1:45. Love, Dad.”
She glanced at the clock. Half an hour. She grabbed two diet Cokes from the fridge and hurried up the stairs.
She had just set their duffle bags on the front porch when Dad walked up the drive from the direction of the barn. He kicked off his muddy boots and hung his work hat on one of the pegs beside the front door.
Ryan looked around. “Where’s Greg? Isn’t he going to say good-bye?”
Kara wanted to hug him. She hadn’t dared to ask.
“Greg went with Bud Davis to check on the cattle. We’ll be moving them down as soon as we close the lodge.” He ruffled Ryan’s hair and dropped a kiss on Kara’s head. “I’ll change and be right down. Ten minutes.”
Mr. Davis was Dad’s friend. The one who had volunteered to help out at the ranch if Greg needed him. He was also a counselor at church, and Kara suspected there was more to this trip than just checking on cattle.
Tia jabbered excitedly as they stowed their gear in the back of the tiny Cessna. But she grew quiet when Dad fired up the engine. When they lifted off, she grabbed Kara’s arm and shut her eyes.
“Don’t be a baby, Tia. Look, there’s the river and the trail to Falcon Ridge.”
But Tia refused to open her eyes or loosen her grip. Kara’s arm was shooting needles by the time they landed at Eagle Lodge.
Dad lifted Ryan out, then helped Tia climb over the struts while Kara jumped to the ground. She shielded her eyes from the sun and could just see the green tractor heading toward them from behind the barn.
Kara reached up to make sure her hair was still in place. She had coiled it on top of her head this morning and pulled some tendrils free. It hadn’t turned out quite as glamorous as when the stylist did it, but Tia insisted it still made her look older.
She motioned Tia over. “Colin’s coming with the trailer. He’ll get our bags. Come on, I’ll show you around.”
They met Colin at the bottom of the hill. He stopped the tr
actor in front of Tia. “Hi. Tia, right? Mr. Sheridan radioed you were coming. I set up a cot in Kara’s room.” He squinted down at Kara. “Uh, Wakara? Did you have a good time? What did you do to your hair?”
She wanted to tell him to pick his chin up off the ground, but she didn’t trust her voice.
Tia answered for her. “We both got our hair done. Cool, huh?” She swished her hair down and forward, then spun around, showing off the back.
“Uh, yeah, cool. I mean, sure, it looks great. Just takes some getting used to is all.” He tipped his hat and slipped into his comic drawl. “If you ladies will excuse me, I’ll deliver your bags to your room.”
Kara realized her hands were balled into fists and forced herself to relax. Let him think what he wants about my hair. What does it matter? “Come on, Tia, these jeans are hot. I want to change and check on Lily.”
“Hey, slow down,” Tia whispered. “He’s as cute as I remembered.”
Kara huffed and puffed as she climbed. Two days away from this hill and I’m already out of shape. “I thought you liked Devon.”
Tia shrugged. “Devon’s in Lariat. Colin’s here. Anyway, it’s not like I want to marry Colin or anything. I just said he was cute.”
Kara changed into cutoffs and a T-shirt. Tia chose a new pair of white short shorts and a black, open-weaved crop top with a white sports bra underneath.
“Does your dad know you’re wearing that?”
Tia shrugged, then grinned. “Pops isn’t here. Mellow out, Kara. All the girls wear these.”
I’ll bet. She decided to keep it cool. “Come on. If I know Anne, she’ll have a snack waiting in the dining room.”
Kara wasn’t disappointed. Anne had just set out a plate of oatmeal cookies and a bowl of apples. Pitchers of iced tea and lemonade were already on the serving counter.
The cook greeted Tia with a smile. “It is good to finally meet you. Wakara speaks of you often.” If Anne noticed Tia’s skimpy clothes, she didn’t show it.
Colin noticed though. He barely said a word during dinner. Kara could tell he was trying not to stare at Tia. A couple of times she caught him looking at her hair.
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