The Skeptics Annotated Bible

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The Skeptics Annotated Bible Page 258

by Wells, Steve


  35 Has there ever been a righteous person?

  36 Verily I say unto you, All these things shall come upon this generation.

  (23.36) “All these things shall come upon this generation.” Jesus predicts the end of the world within the lifetime of his listeners.

  37 O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, thou that killest the prophets, and stonest them which are sent unto thee, how often would I have gathered thy children together, even as a hen gathereth her chickens under her wings, and ye would not!

  38 Behold, your house is left unto you desolate.

  39 For I say unto you, Ye shall not see me henceforth, till ye shall say, Blessed is he that cometh in the name of the Lord.

  MATTHEW 24

  24 And Jesus went out, and departed from the temple: and his disciples came to him for to shew him the buildings of the temple.

  2 And Jesus said unto them, See ye not all these things? verily I say unto you, There shall not be left here one stone upon another, that shall not be thrown down.

  (24.3-51) The end of the world will be signaled by wars, famines, disease, and earthquakes (6-7). And that's just “the beginning of sorrows” (8). Next believers will be hated and killed by unbelievers (9), believers will hate and betray each other (10), false prophets will fool people (11), iniquity will abound and love wax cold (12). But hey, if you make through all that, you'll be saved (13).

  Only one more thing will happen before the end comes: the gospel will be preached throughout the world (14). Well, that and the abomination of desolations will stand in the holy place (15), many false Christs and false prophets will show great signs and wonders (24), the sun and moon will be darkened and the stars will fall (29), the sign of the son of Man will appear in the sky, everyone on earth will mourn, and then, finally, the great and powerful son of Man will come in all his glory (30).

  Oh, and all these things will happen within the lifespan of Jesus' contemporaries (34).

  Or maybe not. Jesus was talking about things he knew nothing about (36). (See Mark 13.32.)

  3 And as he sat upon the mount of Olives, the disciples came unto him privately, saying, Tell us, when shall these things be? and what shall be the sign of thy coming, and of the end of the world?

  (24.3) “Tell us … what shall be the sign of thy coming, and of the end of the world?”

  4 And Jesus answered and said unto them, Take heed that no man deceive you.

  5 For many shall come in my name, saying, I am Christ; and shall deceive many.

  6 And ye shall hear of wars and rumours of wars: see that ye be not troubled: for all these things must come to pass, but the end is not yet.

  (24.6) “Wars and rumours of wars”

  7 For nation shall rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom: and there shall be famines, and pestilences, and earthquakes, in divers places.

  (24.7) “Nation shall rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom: and there shall be famines, and pestilences, and earthquakes.”

  8 All these are the beginning of sorrows.

  (24.8) “These are the beginning of sorrows.”

  9 Then shall they deliver you up to be afflicted, and shall kill you: and ye shall be hated of all nations for my name’s sake.

  (24.9) “Then shall they … kill you: and ye shall be hated.”

  10 And then shall many be offended, and shall betray one another, and shall hate one another.

  (24.10) “Then shall many be offended, and shall betray one another, and shall hate one another.”

  11 And many false prophets shall rise, and shall deceive many.

  (24.11) “Many false prophets shall rise, and shall deceive many.”

  12 And because iniquity shall abound, the love of many shall wax cold.

  (24.12) “Iniquity shall abound, the love of many shall wax cold.”

  13 But he that shall endure unto the end, the same shall be saved.

  (24.13) “He that shall endure unto the end, the same shall be saved.”

  14 And this gospel of the kingdom shall be preached in all the world for a witness unto all nations; and then shall the end come.

  (24.14) “This gospel … shall be preached in all the world … and then shall the end come.” Jesus says the gospel will be preached to all nations “and then shall the end come.” But in Matthew 10.23, he said the end would come before the gospel was preached to all the cities of Israel.

  In any case, this is a false prophecy since the gospel has been preached throughout the world (as Paul says in Romans 10.18) yet the world hasn't ended.

  354 When will the world end?

  15 When ye therefore shall see the abomination of desolation, spoken of by Daniel the prophet, stand in the holy place, (whoso readeth, let him understand:)

  (24.15) “When ye … see the abomination of desolation, spoken of by Daniel the prophet, stand in the holy place, (whoso readeth, let him understand:)” If you see the abomination of desolation in the holy place, try to understand. God is trying to say something.

  16 Then let them which be in Judaea flee into the mountains:

  (24.16) “Let them which be in Judea flee into the mountains.” Why? Can't God find and kill them there, too?

  17 Let him which is on the housetop not come down to take any thing out of his house:

  18 Neither let him which is in the field return back to take his clothes.

  19 And woe unto them that are with child, and to them that give suck in those days!

  (24.19) “Woe unto them that are with child, and to them that give suck in those days.” Why? Does God especially hate pregnant and nursing women?

  20 But pray ye that your flight be not in the winter, neither on the sabbath day:

  21 For then shall be great tribulation, such as was not since the beginning of the world to this time, no, nor ever shall be.

  22 And except those days should be shortened, there should no flesh be saved: but for the elect’s sake those days shall be shortened.

  23 Then if any man shall say unto you, Lo, here is Christ, or there; believe it not.

  24 For there shall arise false Christs, and false prophets, and shall shew great signs and wonders; insomuch that, if it were possible, they shall deceive the very elect.

  (24.24) “There shall arise false Christs, and false prophets, and shall shew great signs and wonders.” Jesus himself, according to Acts 2.22, fits this description.

  25 Behold, I have told you before.

  26 Wherefore if they shall say unto you, Behold, he is in the desert; go not forth: behold, he is in the secret chambers; believe it not.

  27 For as the lightning cometh out of the east, and shineth even unto the west; so shall also the coming of the Son of man be.

  28 For wheresoever the carcase is, there will the eagles be gathered together.

  29 Immediately after the tribulation of those days shall the sun be darkened, and the moon shall not give her light, and the stars shall fall from heaven, and the powers of the heavens shall be shaken:

  (24.29) “The sun be darkened, and the moon shall not give her light, and the stars shall fall from heaven.”

  30 And then shall appear the sign of the Son of man in heaven: and then shall all the tribes of the earth mourn, and they shall see the Son of man coming in the clouds of heaven with power and great glory.

  (24.30) “Then shall appear the sign of the Son of man in heaven: and then shall all … the earth mourn, and they shall see the Son of man coming in the clouds of heaven with power and great glory.”

  377 Will Jesus' second coming be visible to all?

  31 And he shall send his angels with a great sound of a trumpet, and they shall gather together his elect from the four winds, from one end of heaven to the other.

  (24.31) “He shall send his angels with a great sound of a trumpet, and they shall gather together his elect.”

  32 Now learn a parable of the fig tree; When his branch is yet tender, and putteth forth leaves, ye know that summer is nigh:

  33 So likew
ise ye, when ye shall see all these things, know that it is near, even at the doors.

  (24.32-33) “Learn a parable of the fig tree; When his branch is yet tender, and putteth forth leaves, ye know that summer is nigh: So likewise ye, when ye shall see all these things, know that it is near, even at the doors.” Based on these verses, Hal Linsey's The Late, Great Planet Earth predicted that the end of the world would occur before 1988. The fig tree represents Israel, Israel came back to life in 1948, and Jesus said the end would come within one generation (40 years).

  34 Verily I say unto you, This generation shall not pass, till all these things be fulfilled.

  (24.34) “This generation shall not pass, till all these things be fulfilled.” Jesus was a false prophet, since he predicted that the end of the world will come within the lifetimes of his disciples. The world didn't end then, and according to Ec 1.4 it never will.

  Speaking of false prophets, the Jehovah's Witnesses used to interpret this verse to mean that some of those who witnessed Jesus' return in 1914 would still be alive when Armageddon happened. Now that those alive in 1914 are now pretty much dead, the JWs have given up on this prediction.

  35 Heaven and earth shall pass away, but my words shall not pass away.

  (24.35) “Heaven and earth shall pass away.”

  147 Will the earth last forever?

  36 But of that day and hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels of heaven, but my Father only.

  (24.36) “But of that day and that hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels of heaven, but my Father only.”

  37 But as the days of Noe were, so shall also the coming of the Son of man be.

  (24.37) “As the days of Noe were, so shall also the coming of the Son of man be.” Jesus believed that Noah's flood actually happened and he had no problem with drowning everyone on earth. It'll be just like that when he returns.

  38 For as in the days that were before the flood they were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, until the day that Noe entered into the ark,

  39 And knew not until the flood came, and took them all away; so shall also the coming of the Son of man be.

  40 Then shall two be in the field; the one shall be taken, and the other left.

  41 Two women shall be grinding at the mill; the one shall be taken, and the other left.

  42 Watch therefore: for ye know not what hour your Lord doth come.

  43 But know this, that if the goodman of the house had known in what watch the thief would come, he would have watched, and would not have suffered his house to be broken up.

  44 Therefore be ye also ready: for in such an hour as ye think not the Son of man cometh.

  (24.44) “In such an hour as ye think not the Son of man cometh.”

  45 Who then is a faithful and wise servant, whom his lord hath made ruler over his household, to give them meat in due season?

  (24.45) “Who then is a faithful and wise servant?” For Jehovah’s Witnessess, this is the most important verse in the Bible. It is the basis of their central dogma, that the governing body of the Jehovah's Witnesses is the “faithful and wise servant,” or as the NWT puts it “the faithful and discrete slave.” As such, the governing body must be obeyed in all matters and all of their teachings must be accepted. Those who do so will survive Armageddon; those who do not, will not.

  46 Blessed is that servant, whom his lord when he cometh shall find so doing.

  47 Verily I say unto you, That he shall make him ruler over all his goods.

  48 But and if that evil servant shall say in his heart, My lord delayeth his coming;

  49 And shall begin to smite his fellowservants, and to eat and drink with the drunken;

  50 The lord of that servant shall come in a day when he looketh not for him, and in an hour that he is not aware of,

  51 And shall cut him asunder, and appoint him his portion with the hypocrites: there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth.

  (24.48-51) “That evil servant … The lord of that servant shall come in a day when he looketh not for him … And shall cut him asunder, and … there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth.” God will come when people least expect him. Then he'll “cut [them] asunder.” And “there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth.”

  MATTHEW 25

  (25.1-13) The parable of the five well-oiled virgins

  The kingdom of heaven is like ten virgins who went to meet their bridegroom. Five had oil for their lamps and five didn't. When the bridegroom was ready for them, only the five well-oiled virgins got to have sex with him on their wedding night. He shunned the other five, saying “Get lost, ladies. I don't even know you.” The moral to the story is this: watch out and keep your oil handy. You never know when Jesus will come.

  16 Is polygamy OK?

  25 Then shall the kingdom of heaven be likened unto ten virgins, which took their lamps, and went forth to meet the bridegroom.

  (25.1) “Then shall the kingdom of heaven be likened unto ten virgins, which took their lamps, and went forth to meet the bridegroom.”

  2 And five of them were wise, and five were foolish.

  (25.2) “Five of them were wise, and five were foolish.”

  3 They that were foolish took their lamps, and took no oil with them:

  (25.3) “They that were foolish took their lamps, and took no oil with them.”

  4 But the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps.

  (25.4) “But the wise took oil in their vessels.”

  5 While the bridegroom tarried, they all slumbered and slept.

  6 And at midnight there was a cry made, Behold, the bridegroom cometh; go ye out to meet him.

  (25.6) “At midnight there was a cry made, Behold, the bridegroom cometh; go ye out to meet him.”

  7 Then all those virgins arose, and trimmed their lamps.

  8 And the foolish said unto the wise, Give us of your oil; for our lamps are gone out.

  9 But the wise answered, saying, Not so; lest there be not enough for us and you: but go ye rather to them that sell, and buy for yourselves.

  10 And while they went to buy, the bridegroom came; and they that were ready went in with him to the marriage: and the door was shut.

  (25.10) “The bridegroom came; and they that were ready went in with him to the marriage: and the door was shut.”

  11 Afterward came also the other virgins, saying, Lord, Lord, open to us.

  (25.11) “Afterward came also the other virgins, saying, Lord, Lord, open to us.”

  12 But he answered and said, Verily I say unto you, I know you not.

  (25.12) “He answered … I know you not.”

  13 Watch therefore, for ye know neither the day nor the hour wherein the Son of man cometh.

  (25.13) “Ye know neither the day nor the hour wherein the Son of man cometh.”

  (25.14-30) The parable of the cruel and unjust master

  The kingdom of heaven is like a rich man who distributed his wealth to his servants while he traveled. He gave five talents to one servant, two to another, and one to a third. When he returned, the servant with five talents had made five more, the servant with two made two more, but the servant with one talent only had the talent his master entrusted to him. The master rewarded the servants that invested his money (without his permission—what would have happened if the stock market went down during their master's travels?) and took the talent from the single-talent servant and gave it to the one with ten talents. “For unto every one that hath shall be given … but from him that hath not shall be taken away even that which he hath.” Then the cruel and unjust master cast the servant who carefully protected his master's talent into the “outer darkness: [where] there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth.”

  14 For the kingdom of heaven is as a man travelling into a far country, who called his own servants, and delivered unto them his goods.

  (25.14) “The kingdom of heaven is as a man travelling … who called his own servants, and delivered unto them his goods.”
r />   15 And unto one he gave five talents, to another two, and to another one; to every man according to his several ability; and straightway took his journey.

  (25.15) “Unto one he gave five talents, to another two, and to another one.”

  16 Then he that had received the five talents went and traded with the same, and made them other five talents.

  17 And likewise he that had received two, he also gained other two.

  18 But he that had received one went and digged in the earth, and hid his lord’s money.

  (25.16-18) “He that had received the five talents … made … five talents. He that had received two … gained … two. But he that had received one … hid his lord's money.”

  19 After a long time the lord of those servants cometh, and reckoneth with them.

  (25.19) “After a long time the lord of those servants cometh, and reckoneth with them.”

  20 And so he that had received five talents came and brought other five talents, saying, Lord, thou deliveredst unto me five talents: behold, I have gained beside them five talents more.

  21 His lord said unto him, Well done, thou good and faithful servant: thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord.

  (25.20-21) “He that had received five talents … [said] I have gained … five talents more. His lord said … Well done … enter thou into the joy of thy lord.”

  22 He also that had received two talents came and said, Lord, thou deliveredst unto me two talents: behold, I have gained two other talents beside them.

  23 His lord said unto him, Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord.

  (25.22-23) “He … that had received two talents … said … I have gained two other talents … His lord said unto him, Well done … enter thou into the joy of thy lord.”

  24 Then he which had received the one talent came and said, Lord, I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not strawed:

  25 And I was afraid, and went and hid thy talent in the earth: lo, there thou hast that is thine.

 

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