They were a little older, a little wider around the middle than I’d remembered, but they sounded good. An impromptu dance stage was claimed in the middle of the street and people danced to the mushy song. The band finished the song and started it again. I nervously changed positions. Where the hell was Muddy?
The lead singer looked at me with a raised eyebrow. Yeah, I fucking know, dude. It was weird to just keep playing one song over and over. I couldn’t let them stop until Muddy came out, though.
Finally, the front door of her house opened and she stepped out onto the front porch. Her bright red hair was flying in every direction, even wilder than I’d last seen it. She was barefoot, wearing denim cut-offs and a T-shirt tied around her waist. The sexiest outfit I’d ever seen. Her eyes were glowing bright gold and her mouth was set in a thin line that worried me to my very soul.
She practically flew down the steps and crossed the street so fast that I would’ve missed her if my eyes weren’t riveted to her.
I sucked in a breath and was about to start explaining myself, how, or for what, I didn’t know, when she reached me and gave me a hard shove that sent me spilling away from my truck and to the ground. I sat up, wiping dirt from my hands, and scowled. “What the hell, Muddy?”
She bent down and I got distracted for a moment by the way the neck of her shirt scooped low and revealed her bare breasts jiggling inside that worn cotton. “Wrong song. It’s the wrong fucking song, asshole.”
16
Muddy
I seethed as I went back inside to finish cleaning. My heart raced inside of my chest wall, the delicate, stupid thing doing its best to hurl itself outside of my body. The anger was going to eat me alive.
I knew what he’d been trying to do, and he’d gotten the band right, with help from someone, I was sure. The song was wrong, though. How could he fuck that up? It was the song that played when we made love the first time. Had it really meant so little to him?
I slammed every door I came across and didn’t stop until I was in my room, pacing the small space. I wanted to punch him. I’d never wanted to hit someone so badly before. It was crazy. I tugged at my hair, wincing as I felt my claws scratch my scalp. I had to calm down.
Even as I thought it, my door burst open and Lang stepped inside. He slammed the door shut behind him and glared at me. “I’m trying!”
“What? Is that supposed to get you and ‘A’ for effort?” I backed against my closet door and shook my head. “You had them play the wrong song, Lang. It was the wrong song!”
“But the correct band, right? Come on!”
I froze and I felt everything in my body settled into place. This man was supposed to be my mate? A man who can’t figure out what’s wrong when I don’t fall for his poorly planned grand gesture? Bullshit. I deserved better. I reject him!
“What? Why aren’t you fighting?”
I smoothed my hands down my hair and blew out a slow breath. “Because I’m done.”
He looked conflicted. “Okay… So? Are we good?”
I shrugged. “It depends. If good means that you’re going away and never coming back, then yes, we’re good.”
“Come the fuck on, Muddy!” He fisted his hands and turned away from me. “This is ridiculous. We’re mates. I’m making an effort. I came all the way here for you. I’m doing all this to prove to you that I want you. What’s the deal?”
“The deal is that you’re an asshole.”
Lang jerked back around to face me.
I nodded and sat on the corner of my bed. My body was still at war with my emotions, but I was in control. “You’re an asshole, Lang. You always have been. You’re not a nice guy. Maybe you can convince some people you are. At the end of the day, though, you’re still Langdon Millingham. With the parents you have, is it any wonder you turned out to be a spoiled, self-serving, soulless monster?”
Lang was angry then. Angrier than before. He scowled at me and shook his head. “Is that what I am, Muddy?”
I looked away from him so I wouldn’t see the expression on his face. “The sunflowers and the band? You threw money at me, like that would solve everything. You probably didn’t even do any of it yourself. And I’m just supposed to swoon and fall into your arms? You didn’t make any effort to actually talk to me and show me that you have remorse for what you did. Or, to try to get to know me.” I shook my head. “You don’t even know me.”
Lang jerked back like I’d hit him. His eyes went wide. “I didn’t make any effort to talk to you? Everything I’ve been doing has been to try to get you to talk to me! It seems I just keep fucking up.”
He shook his head and when he looked at me again, there was too much emotion on his face for me to process, but he spoke quietly. “You don’t know me either, Muddy. You just think you do. I am sorry. For everything…”
He opened and shut his mouth a few times, no sound actually escaping. “I’m sorry I don’t remember the name of the song, okay? I mean, it was important to you, so I should have paid more attention. What can I say, I was distracted that night.”
“Distracted?” I spit the word out sarcastically.
“Yes, distracted.”
“By what? And if you make a pussy joke, so help me…”
“By…by the pale yellow ribbon you wore in your hair...by how, when I pulled it out, your beautiful, fiery mane tumbled down around your shoulders…by the fuzzy pink cardigan you were wearing over your white lace bra…by the way your eyes twinkled in the moonlight…by your enticing scent of fresh, wild pears…the little purring sound you made in the back of your throat when we kissed…the scratches your nails made across my back as you screamed my name. I remember the taste of you on my tongue…those things are burned into my memory. They’ll be there when I’m 90 years old.
“I wish I knew the song. I admit it, I was too busy watching the look on your face and marveling with extreme pride over the fact that I was the one who put it there. Do you know, in all these years of mergers, acquisitions, and takeovers, I have never felt as proud of anything as I was about that.” He ran his hands through his hair, and released a long breath. “But, no, I don’t remember that fucking song.”
I stared at him in stunned silence. “You remember all that.”
He nodded. “Yes. I remember every detail. Except the one that’s important to you. The goddamned song.”
I glanced over at the curtains. Maybe I’d overreacted. “It’s not that important.”
“I’m not giving up. Maybe I should. I just can’t. Maybe you’re right. Maybe I’m an asshole who deserves to spend the rest of his life miserable and alone. But you don’t deserve that, and I’m your mate. I’m not giving up. That’s probably something else that makes me an asshole. I don’t know, Muddy.” He hung his head and grabbed the doorknob. “I just…I don’t fucking know. I thought I was doing the right things, but apparently, I’m just making it worse.
“You’re wrong, though, Sunshine. I’m not my parents, and I’m not soulless. I’ll show you.”
I held my breath as he left and deflated as the door shut behind him. My lioness cried out and I felt her pain just as much as I felt my own. Maybe he wasn’t quite as much of an asshole as I’d thought. Maybe.
17
Muddy
I didn’t see Lang the rest of the day. The band moved out and the crowd that had formed vanished back into the normal traffic of the streets. Things went back to normal. As normal as they could go, anyway. It was Helen’s Corner, after all. People didn’t refer to us as Hell’s Crazy Corner for nothing.
I did the rest of my chores for the day feeling like there was a weight pressing on my chest. I felt secure about my decision with Lang. He wasn’t right for me, no matter what fate said. He wasn’t right for anyone.
Well, maybe secure wasn’t the best word for what I felt. I felt what I’d done was right, but niggling doubts had started to creep in. It was hard. Lang being my mate made everything so much harder than it needed to be.
I spent more hours than required checking some of the Flamingos out of their rooms. I was cajoled and conned into promising to consider joining them on their next excursion. When I heard swinger’s cruise, my eyes nearly bugged out of my head. But, after Meredith explained that the theme was swing bands, not partner swapping, I sheepishly agreed to think about it. Hey, I wouldn’t put anything past the Flamingo Grannies.
At lunchtime, my mom came in, arm in arm with Duncan, and they sat together, giggling like school children. She winked at me and nodded at Duncan as her way of telling me she was with him. Like I hadn’t already found out. One more woman around here relinquishing her singlehood. I didn’t begrudge my mom her happiness, though. She’d been alone for so long. She deserved it. And Duncan was a great guy. Mom chose well.
Charlie and her mate, Axel, stopped in for a meal, too. Interestingly, Luna was with them. I caught snippets of their conversation and felt sorry for the poor, strange bunny. When Charlie and Axel weren’t unabashedly, and a little disgustingly, flirting with one another, they were both pestering her about getting to know Axel’s ex-motorcycle gang buddy, Pratt, who happened to be Luna’s mate. I couldn’t imagine which was worse for Luna. I certainly didn’t envy her at that moment.
In fact, I kind of wished they would leave her alone. Besides Luna being my one shiny beacon of misery and pain in this town, I understood that despite the fact that everyone around here seemed to have suddenly been bitten by mate fever and that even women who had sworn off men were now starry-eyed in love, sometimes mates sucked. Sometimes nature made mistakes and the one made for you was not the one you wanted.
Between being forced to watch the nauseating displays of delirious happiness gushing from those around me, to being on edge from wondering if Lang would show back up with another infuriating tactic of his, I was strung out. By the end of the day, I wanted to run away.
The desire was stronger than just leaving the house for a little while. I wanted to flee from Helen’s Corner. It was childish and self-indulgent, but that’s what I wanted. I wanted to turn away and act like I couldn’t see everyone I cared about living their lives without me, moving on without me. I loved that they were happy, but it was hard.
It was hard to imagine a time in twenty years or so, when my friends’ all had children and those children were grown up enough to start finding their own mates. I would still be Muddy, the old maid auntie with blue hair and lavender perfume and ergonomic sex toys hidden away in her underwear drawer. That was reality, though. I’d keep growing old and lonely, while my friends blossomed and their families blossomed.
Would I grow bitter and mean at some point? Would being friends with them get too hard? I knew they would never abandon me, but would I shut them out? It just wasn’t fair. I didn’t want to be that way. I loved my friends and wanted them to be happy. It wasn’t their fault that I wasn’t.
No, wait. I was happy. I was fine.
I couldn’t let Lang showing up change my thinking. I’d handled my life and survived for ten years. I was okay, and everything was happy. I didn’t need him. I didn’t need anyone. If I felt my own sanity start to wane, I could leave again, just like when I was eighteen. I could start over somewhere new and pretend that none of my life had ever happened.
I shook my head and cleared those thoughts. How had I gotten back to running away so fast? I couldn’t run away. My whole life was in Helen’s Corner. My mom, my business, my everything. I had to stay and deal with this Lang situation this time.
That didn’t mean I couldn’t run away for a little while, though. Like, for an evening.
Lunch cleared, beds stripped and re-made, rooms cleaned, finally, I was able to shift behind my house and go for a run. My lion needed to stretch her legs. I needed the mindless absence that came with letting her run and be in control.
I checked out while she ran and forced my mind to go blank. I didn’t want to think about any of my problems. I just wanted to be free for a while. So, I was. She ran and I settled back for the ride.
I didn’t pay attention to where she ran. I didn’t attempt to take control. Normally, when on a run, I’d pay attention to direction and boundaries. She was wild and liked to push things. I’d have to remind her that Helen’s Corner was protected land, but that didn’t necessarily mean surrounding areas were safe.
Without me worrying about the boundaries, she raced across the town border, just a couple of sticks thrown on the ground, really. She ran with speed and agility, muscles stretching and the setting sun on her back. I pretended I didn’t have a care in the world and for a little while, all was well.
I was thinking about how maybe I needed to head to a pet store in Smith for a little more catnip, just to tide me over until I was sure Lang was really gone for good when a sharp, biting pain clamped down on our foot. My lion went down hard and screamed out in agony as white hot pain raked up our leg. I looked down at the steel, zig-zag teeth of a bear trap digging into our ankle. I knew the leg was broken, blood was seeping from the clamp, quickly coating our fur. This was not good.
Although I didn’t shift back, my human brain took over while my lioness retreated in shock. I tried to get her to stand and drag us out of the clearing, but the trap was hooked to a chain too thick to break. I roared an agonizing and desperate roar, feeling helpless and angry. Who’d put a trap down? Why would anyone do anything like that? We were outside of Helen’s Corner, though, and I didn’t know much about the people outside of town. Not the ones who’d lay a trap like the one that had snared me, anyway.
“Sounds like we’ve got something big, Cletus!” A dry male voice rang out into the clearing.
I smelled him before I saw him. He was drunk and smelled sour. When I did catch an image of him, it wasn’t any better than his smell. He was a mean looking sonofabitch who looked as if he could’ve been the offspring of first cousins. He carried a shotgun and had the leash of a large hound dog in his hands. My lioness instantly hissed and arched her back, despite the excruciating pain.
“Well, what the fuck is this?” The man looked surprised, but he didn’t look surprised enough. “I know what you are. I knew I’d catch one of you freaks one day. Go ahead and change, lion. I know you’re at least part human, somewhere in there. This here’s my payday, Cletus.”
I hissed again and shied away from him. He wasn’t safe. I’d gotten myself into something bad and I was going to have to deal with it somehow.
“Did you hear me? I said change back!” He raised his gun and fired it in my direction. Dirt and rocks ricocheted off the ground and stung my body. “Change or the next one goes in you!”
I didn’t know what to do. I needed time to think. Before I could figure anything out, the man raised the gun and the loud explosion was followed by my screaming as I shifted back to myself and grabbed at my shoulder that was now riddled with buckshot.
“Well, aren’t you a pretty thing? Maybe I’ll keep you caged for my own personal use.”
I folded in on myself, trying to be as small as possible. My ankle, while smaller than my tigers, was getting clamped at a new and, if possible, worse angle. Agony. Pain burned through me and I could feel my lion shivering, her trauma palpable. I wanted to rip the man’s face off for hurting her.
A loud, menacing growl thundered through the clearing and I glanced up just in time to see a huge, snow white wolf launch itself off the ground and at the man with the gun. The man didn’t even have time to raise the weapon before the wolf was on him, viciously tearing out his throat. The hound dog yelped and pulled away from its flailing owner, then ran as the leash fell from the man’s dead hand.
The wolf turned to me and lifted its bloody muzzle in the air releasing a thunderous, bloodcurdling howl into the silence. Fresh blood dripped from its jowls and as it closed the gap between us, I knew I was safe. At least, physically.
Lang had come to rescue me.
18
Lang
I shifted and wiped blood from my mouth with the back of my han
d. My heart pounded and my hands shook as I closed the gap between myself and Muddy. She was bleeding. The scent of her blood threatened to send my wolf back into a rage, but I had to stay in human form and help her.
“H-hold still, Sunshine.” My voice shook as I grabbed the trap hooked into her leg. I pulled it apart and threw it away from us as she cried out.
Her ankle and leg were a mess. She was torn up pretty badly. If I had the power, I’d bring the asshole back to life and then kill him again, slower this time.
“I’m going to carry you out of here.”
She moaned as I tried to lift her and I froze. I couldn’t allow her injured leg to dangle freely. I was going to hurt her more that way. Instead, I went over to the dead man and yanked his coat off his body. Ripping it apart, I made a longer loop of fabric that I loosely tied around my waist and then dropped to my knees beside Muddy.
“I’m going to shift. Can you get yourself onto my back?”
I didn’t wait for her answer. I shifted and nudged her. I needed to get her somewhere fast to stop the bleeding and set her ankle. From the looks of things, time was of the essence. She maneuvered herself up enough that I was able to nudge her the rest of the way onto my back. She hooked the fabric over her back and I held it in my mouth tightly, trapping her against my body.
I started off slower at first, but once I knew she could handle it, I ran full out. There was no time to waste. In addition to her needing immediate medical care, I wasn’t sure how long she’d remain conscious. I concentrated on avoiding branches and bushes that might grab at Muddy. I did my best to transport her as swiftly and safely as I could.
Instead of running to her place, which would be busy and full of questioning eyes, I took her to the place I was renting. It was a large property, a private lake surrounded by several acres. She could heal and I could tend to her while she did.
Wolf Purebred (She-Shifters of Hell's Corner Book 5) Page 8