"Tim, I'm sorry... I was going to tell you right away, but I didn't think it was that important at the time... I... honestly, I didn't get around to talking to you about it, because this happened straight afterwards." She said appearing guilty but firm.
"You know you have to tell me anything that goes on in here Lydia! Even you should have told Aiden that! So... start now, before I lose my rag!" I said feeling stressed all of a sudden.
"Okay Tim... well... the thing is... Shirley knew me from my old school days." I heard Aiden explain as I quickly sprung around to look at him. "She didn't recognise me at first, but I knew who she was that night in the dark... I recognised her voice and then... when I saw her outline and her hair... well... I just knew it was her. I'm sorry I didn't say anything until now... maybe if I had... well... this could have been stopped." Aiden stressed as he collapsed to the floor.
"So who was she to you? Was she a friend? An enemy? Wait... I think I can guess that bit." I said sarcastically. "So you are telling me that this could have been avoided if you had just come and told me?" I felt anger boil up inside me and it overwhelmed me at the thought of not being consulted about something so important as this.
"Well... I'm not sure about that.... You see... back in the old days when I knew her, she thought I was a bully to her, but I wasn't... I just hung around with the bullies back then, but I didn't do any of that... I actually felt sorry for her... I wasn't that kind of kid anyway. I was only a teenager!" Aiden screamed.
"From what I can see, it seems like she has now discovered who you are and she is now out to get you! Don't you think?" I said agitatedly.
"Tim... why are you being so annoying all of sudden?" I heard Lydia's inquisitive voice behind me.
"I'm sorry." I wasn't really apologising, but saying it made me feel better. "But all of this could have been avoided if Aiden had spoken up in the first place and what about you Lydia... you should have told me straight away!" I said beginning to explode.
"Tim! What's gotten into you? Why are you being so unreasonable?" She yelled.
"Because... this... here..." I waved my arms around trying to express my fury. "This... could have been avoided... and... I'm furious that this has happened inside this home where it's supposed to be safe for us! Can't you understand that? Because... you should by now!" I screamed hysterically.
I couldn't control my anger. I knew why, but I didn't want to talk about that to anyone. It would upset Lydia.
"I see... I didn't realise you felt so strongly about our safety. I'm sorry Tim." She said sadly to me.
"You should be! Now... clear this up Aiden! I don't want anyone, especially, the kids seeing this body in here... do you understand! Just get rid of it now! I'm going outside to calm down! Don't follow me Lydia! I want to be alone!" I yelled and stormed out of the room leaving Aiden and Lydia alone with Shirley.
I couldn't stand it any longer. I had to drink something quickly. I could feel a panic rise up inside of me so vile. I thought I should have a swig of whisky to relieve it. My drinking was normal these days, so I didn't know why I felt like I still needed it in times of stress. I knew it was the fact that I hadn't seen a biter in a while, but seeing one again had brought me back to reality. I couldn't escape from this life anymore I thought, as I entered the barn and found a bottle of whisky that I had hidden in a barrel. I took a swig from the bottle and instantly felt relieved.
I had to stop. I couldn't keep running to a bottle every time something went wrong. I'd been stable for a long time, but it was the thought of what might be coming that had riled me up. It was the strangers that had ruined things for us. It suddenly made me realise just how tough it was going to get in this world. Now, Shirley would wake up in an angry outrage against Aiden, but I fumed at the thought of her trying to start something up. If she tried anything, I would just have to kill her!
The thought had come into my head before, but now it scared me to think in this way. I knew it would be vital one day. Killing real people was something that scared me. It was easier to get rid of the biters, but people were becoming furious these days and I knew the time was coming when we would have to start killing others. What would Lydia think? Would she agree? No. Those thoughts could never enter her mind!
I drank from the bottle until I was obliterated by it. The drunkenness just thawed me away into oblivion as I fell asleep.
30. Lydia Brown - Civilisation
Tim disappeared after the incident with Charlie. I had gone to my room and I hoped he would be there, but there was no sign of him anywhere. I wondered why he had seemed so angry. I wanted to comfort him, so I waited for him to return.
After a while, I fell asleep and awoke in the morning to no sign of Tim. I got up and decided to go look for him. He had to be somewhere. Why had he disappeared? Was he annoyed with me? Was there something on his mind?
I hoped he was okay. The fact that Aiden hadn't told him about Shirley had annoyed Tim, but I couldn't figure out why he had become so mad.
I wandered about the house looking for him. Tim was nowhere to be found. I went into the living room and found his brother there. He was sitting reading a book.
"Hi Joe." I announced. "Have you seen Tim today?"
"Hey Lydia. No... I haven't." He looked concerned all of sudden and I didn't want to worry him. "Is everything okay?" I didn't know how to answer that question without sounding too serious.
"Yeah... sure... just looking for him that's all Joe. Nothing out of the ordinary... he's probably sharpening his sticks somewhere." I joked.
"Yeah... probably... sometimes he goes to the barn to do that... he might be hanging out there." Joe stated.
"Oh... really... I didn't realise he liked the barn.... oh well... perhaps I'll go there now and see." I said as I turned to go.
"Okay... but when you find him, tell him I want a word with him." Joe said as he raised his eyebrows and got up from the sofa. "Oh... hey Lydia... I heard what happened last night. Are you okay? Is Tim alright?"
"Oh... that... yeah he's fine except his anger scared me." I replied.
"His anger? What do you mean? Is he okay?" Joe asked in a serious tone.
"Well... he was so annoyed with how things had escalated in that room... for one..." I started to say, but then realised Joe might not know about Aiden's past relationship with Shirley. I had to keep quiet about it.
"Yes...? You were saying." Joe pressed.
"Oh... don't worry about me... talk to Tim or Aiden... they will tell you everything. But whatever you do... keep it quiet for now." I explained.
"Now you've got me worried." Joe answered.
"Don't be... It's all under control." I said as I left the room quickly before Joe stopped me from leaving.
I went outside and headed to the barn. The door was closed, so I peeped through the small window. It was dark in there and I couldn't see anything, but something led me to go inside.
The door creaked as I pushed it. I saw a flash light left on the side and picked it up. I turned it on and walked further inside. There to my disbelief was Tim sprawled out on the floor. There was a bottle of alcohol thrown next to him. He'd been drinking again was my first thought. But why? What had led him to get this way? What was he scared of?
All I knew was that it had something to do with Charlie's death and Aiden's past relationship with Shirley. Tim always seemed to have a theory lately and I couldn't work out what that could be at this point. I needed to talk to him. I wanted to find out what was on his mind. He usually confided in me, but this time he hadn't. I worried for him.
I knelt down beside him and flicked his hair away from his eyes. It had started to grow long and thick. It needed cutting I thought as my fingers glided gently through it. My hand touched his ice cold, stubbly chin. The icy weather was getting worse. Everything was freezing up outside and it was no better in the barn.
Suddenly, he moved and his eyes opened. I heard him groan. He must be feeling awful, especially if he'd drank the whole bottle.
"Tim... are you okay?" I asked in a quiet, gentle voice.
I watched him as he looked up at me. His piercing blue eyes stared into mine as he tried to sit up.
"Just about." He answered.
"What's going on Tim? Why drink now after all you have achieved? Is there something on your mind?" I asked.
"Don't you know?" He asked me.
"Know what?"
"The time has come... things are changing now... and it's not good!" He said strongly.
I didn't know what he was going on about. In fact, at first, I thought he sounded like he was going mad.
"Tim... please explain." I stated.
"Look... let me get some water and then we’ll talk. Okay?" He said as I sighed.
"Okay, but I want answers to why you have suddenly gone off the deep end." I said, determined to get to the bottom of it.
"Don't worry... we will talk it through." He told me as we walked out of the barn.
I waited whilst he got some water and then we went to the bedroom to chat. I thought he looked like death at first, but the colour in his cheeks began to slowly come back after he'd drank a bottle of water.
"So..." I said impatiently.
"Okay... well... I've had a theory about stuff and people lately... when Shirley and Charlie turned up I wanted to get rid of them. I didn't want anyone else joining our group. When that incident happened last night... I kind of knew that it was starting." He explained.
"What's starting Tim."
"When Aiden told me that he had once known Shirley and that she had been bullied by his friends... well... it was a problem for me. You see my theory is that people... not all people now, but some, will have started to get selfishly mad. Most will want what we have... they will either kill, injure you or steal to get what they want." He stated.
"I see your point... but I'm sure Shirley isn't like that." I said with conviction.
"Maybe not... but it's a risk having her here. She will have a grudge against Aiden when she wakes up. I am sure of it. Especially, when she discovers Charlie is dead. Can't you see this Lydia?" He asked me.
"I understand what you're saying Tim, but we can work it all out. It will be okay. We can do this... I'm sure of it. Aiden will talk to her when we are there with him and we will try to help her see that it was all an accident." I said trying to convince him.
"It won't work... I know it in my heart... she's a strong lady who will fight back... and... it was Aiden who she tried to attack... not Charlie... it's no use in trying to convince me Lydia... we have to be strong now and fight for our space here and everything we have accomplished, because... it's going to get tougher in this world. Killing the biters is not the only thing we may have to kill in the future." Tim said as he sighed.
"Kill? Kill what else Tim?" I asked furiously.
"We may have to kill other people... strangers Lydia... thieves... murderers... who knows..." Tim replied.
"We are not killing Shirley! That's what this is about... isn't it?" I screamed.
"It has to be done... she will lead us to a terrible destruction... don't forget there are kids here and a baby now." Tim said in a loud voice.
I knew what he meant, but I just didn't want to believe that Shirley would go against us all. She seemed like a genuine sort of person from what I had gathered so far. She wasn't a thief or a killer!
We sat there in silence for half an hour until there was a knock at the door.
"Come in." I said.
It was Joe looking serious and slightly out of breath.
"What's up Joe?" I asked with concern.
"Shirley's awake! She's causing havoc and going crazy with Aiden... you better come quick!" Joe shouted.
It had started. Tim looked at me and nodded. It was his way of saying that he had been right all along. I knew it had been tried twice already at the beginning; once when someone tried to attack me outside Tim's sister's house and then, when those thugs had sprung on us wanting our caravan, and then at the castle.
Was this the end of civilisation? Did we have to worry about how strangers were going to react if they approached or came across us? Would they murder us or steal from us? Is humanity lost now and forever?
I shuddered as horrific thoughts went through my mind. I shook my shoulders, trying to get rid of them, as we both rushed out of the bedroom door.
31. Tim Sparks - Madness
Lydia and I stepped into the room to see Shirley being helped by Doctor Jenny and Janice. They were fixing her pillows as she sighed trying to sit up.
I saw her glance at me for a second. I noticed a spark of something in her expression, but I couldn't be sure what it meant. I looked around and saw Aiden wasn't in the room. It was just as well he wasn't here.
"Shirley..." I said acknowledging her. "How are you feeling?" It took her a few minutes to answer.
"I'm okay... but where is Charlie? I want to see him." I didn't know what I was going to say to her.
I stared at Lydia, hoping she would step in, but then I realised that she might say too much. I looked over at Doctor Jenny. I wanted to speak to her first before I said anything to Jenny.
"Shirley... I have to speak to the doc here and then we will talk." I noticed how Shirley's face turned bright red. Was that anger?
Jenny, Lydia and I went outside. I breathed in deeply hoping things would be okay. I wasn't expecting things to go well.
"So doc how is she doing? Are there any concerns?" I asked.
"No... only that she is starting to remember stuff but she's still a bit tired and slightly jittery. She had a seizure. I'm not sure why, but I do suspect that she might have suffered mentally in the past considering what I now know from Aiden." Jenny replied as she tried to smile.
"Jittery? Mentally? What do you mean by that?" I asked.
"Well... like she's nervous and well... I heard that she was bullied in the past and I get the feeling she doesn't trust me or this place you know... really... I'm not that sure of anything, but she is doing good now, except that she has lost her husband." Jenny said wearily.
"Yeah... well... I hope you haven't mentioned anything about Charlie, because I think I should tell her and a few of us should be ready to take her down if the need arises, so Jenny... go get your husband, Aiden, Joe and Nick to stand outside this room now."
Jenny nodded and went on her way. Lydia abruptly turned to me, touching my arm.
"Tim... what do you think you are going to do? It sounds like you mean to kill Shirley if the need arises... is that what you are planning? Because I am not going along with that... you can't do that... we can't turn into monsters just because she might go crazy with us!" I touched Lydia's cheek with my right hand. It was soft and warm.
"I know, but we still have to be ready for anything with her. You heard what Jenny said. She's jittery and she thinks she is mentally unsafe. You just have to trust me Lydia." I said calmly.
She smiled weakly at me without answering and then, we went back into the room to speak to Shirley. She was sitting up straight now with a few pillows behind her. She seemed calm enough, but she spoke unsteadily, although I wasn't sure if she was putting it on or not. Something felt off about her.
"Well, where's Charlie? Did you tell him I'm awake?" She asked urgently.
"Shirley... do you remember anything from earlier?" I asked with caution.
"Like what? Wasn't I asleep for hours? Because my memory is a bit fuzzy at the moment... I think I remember a few things like seeing another man in my room with Charlie, but I think it might have been a dream. I thought the man looked like someone from my old school days.... someone who was a bully I think." She said as she touched her head with her right hand, pushing her tangled hair out of her eyes.
"It wasn't a dream." I paused trying to find the guts to tell her what had happened to her husband.
"It wasn't?" She asked curiously.
"No... you saw a man called Aiden in this room. I think you knew him once, but he is not a bully...
he hung out with the bullies but he wasn't one himself."
"Oh... right... I think I remember him now." She said looking down at her hands. I couldn't tell if she was angry or not.
"You do? Okay... well... that means you remember who he was... Is that right?" I asked and she nodded back at me. I couldn't tell if she was anxious, so I went on as carefully as I could.
Lydia stepped around Shirley's other side of the bed. I knew what she was doing. She wanted to be near her in case things went wrong.
"Right Shirley... I need you to remember what happened when you saw Charlie in here last... he was with Aiden and you woke up for a minute. Do you remember?" She looked directly into my eyes. They appeared to be serious.
"I remember seeing them and then everything went black... that's it." She replied.
I knew I had to tell her that Charlie was now dead by her own hand. It was going to be ugly. I could feel it.
"Okay then..." I couldn't find the right words to explain it to her. She just kept staring at me. Those dark brown eyes of hers reminded me of a scary aunt I once had.
"Is there something wrong?" Shirley, suddenly, asked.
"Well... you could say that... it's Charlie.... he's dead..." I said abruptly as I watched her closely, seeing the tears fall.
"What? But... I... Oh no... it was me... wasn't it? I have a vague memory, but I thought it was just a dream. It was real... It was real wasn't it? I killed him!" Her voice shook as the tears rolled down her cheeks.
"Yes." I said with caution.
I was ready to take charge. I dreaded what might happen next.
"And..." Shirley paused as she stared at me. "And that guy that was in here... Aiden... I hated him... oh no! I wanted to kill him!" She shouted.
"Yes... but it all went horribly wrong Shirley." I replied.
"Yes... oh no... what have I done... Charlie... my poor Charlie... he was probably just trying to stop me from going mad." She said hysterically.
"Yes he was... but why were you going mad Shirley?" I wanted to know how she had felt at the time since she mentioned it.
The Biters (Book 1): Time to Run Page 12