“You’re the best, Liam. Love, Sam.”
“You’ll be amazing, Liam. Love, Sam.”
“Dude, did you sleep with her?” I ask. Liam shakes his head.
“No, and maybe that’s the problem. I’ve rebuffed her advances. I just want to keep things professional and earn our way to the top.”
“Yeah, well, I think Sam is making it very clear that the way to the top is by shagging her.” JD says as he drops the cards on the floor.
Liam starts picking up the vases and moving them into the corner. He stacks them on top of each other, breaking the flowers underneath. JD and I follow and soon enough we have a minimal amount of space to sit down.
“I’ll take care of it.” That’s the last thing Liam says before we start going over the set list.
We’ve been down this path before in the early stages, just after we signed with Moreno Entertainment. Liam and I were so new to this side of the industry we didn’t know what to expect. JD said his dad was a total diva when it came to his dressing room, but never to this extreme.
Who does that? Oh right, Sam does because she’s completely unhinged.
“Katelyn is your friend and you know her better than I do, but what happened back there, you can’t let her see that type of anger. She has no clue what she’s done wrong. She’s learning the ropes here. We hired her without any experience so—”
“I’ll take care of it.”
The last time Liam said that, Sam got worse.
I kiss Quinn on the forehead and ruffle Noah’s hair. Elle looks up at me with her big brown eyes identical to her mother’s, and smiles. Since her nightmare, she’s followed me around. I’m not complaining. Any man would love to have a gorgeous brunette on his tail all the time. I wish it was her mother, but I’m not picky. I’m not sure what to do with Elle. Kissing her on the forehead is out of the question and ruffling her hair is a boy thing, but from her expression, she’s expecting something. I step forward and kneel down in front of her.
“Are you going to watch the show?”
“Uh huh, on the big TV.” Elle points the TV that the boys are playing on. I hope that Quinn and Noah turn the game off for just a bit so the girls can watch the concert.
“When I throw my drumstick in the air, that will be the sign that I’m thinking about you, okay? I don’t want to mess up your pretty hair like I did with Noah.”
“Don’t you want to give me a kiss, here?” She taps her forehead. I nod and lean in placing a quick kiss where her finger is. She giggles, which reverberates right through my heart.
“What about me?” Peyton asks.
I place my index finger of my upper lip and pretend to think. “When I bang my sticks together – that’s when I’m thinking about you.”
“Whatever,” she says as she gets up. Both Elle and I watch her as she sits down next to Noah, who moves slightly closer to her. She’s lucky she has Noah because right now, I think he and Liam are her favorite people.
“She’s so mean,” Elle whispers.
“She’s just upset, sweetie. It will get better.”
I stand and leave the kids’ room. I don’t worry so much about Quinn, but the others aren’t used to hanging out in a room for a few hours by themselves. I know Josie and Katelyn, plus our security staff, will check on them, but Peyton concerns me. If Noah isn’t paying attention to her, who’s to say she’ll stay where’s she’s supposed to?
The crowd is loud, chanting West. Liam and JD are standing at the stage opening, waiting for me. I’m always the last to arrive – never wanting to leave Quinn before I have to. I stand behind them while we watch our road crew tune our instruments, making sure everything is perfect. This is the best part, the anticipation. The crowd is getting wild because they know it’s time.
I find an opening in the curtain and peek out. This venue is small; an old coliseum left standing when a bigger one was built for larger capacity crowds, but perfect for small shows like ours.
I thought when Liam moved to Beaumont that band life was going to be different and honestly, I didn’t want that. Yes, I wanted a more normal life for Quinn, but I wasn’t willing to give up my passion. Thankfully, Liam felt the same way. I strive for this. I need this.
She’s behind me. I can feel her. If I lean back, we’ll be touching. I wonder if she realizes how close she is to me. I’m tempted to let my hand fall to my side and seek out her fingers, if anything, just to brush ours together to give me enough of a jolt to last me though my set.
The lights go down and that’s our cue. I’m to go out first, but I’m not budging. I don’t want to leave the shared space with Katelyn. Liam puts his head back and rolls his neck. He’s ready. I know I must move.
“Good luck, Harrison,” she says. I’m not sure how I can hear her over the crowd, but I do. I feel the smallest of pressure on my back. I turn slightly and look at her. She allows us the briefest of eye contact before turning away. That’s enough to spur me into action. I brush past JD and Liam, who both slap me on the back, and turn left and count my steps. One, two, three, four and turn right. Another five and I’m sitting on my stool. I spin once before pulling my drumsticks out of my back pocket.
I hit the cymbal and the crowd roars. Even through the darkness I know JD and Liam are on stage waiting for me to get things started. I raise my arms above my head and bang my sticks together for a count of five. My sticks slam down on my drums and the lights come on. The fans scream just as Liam and JD starts their riffs.
It’s pure magic.
My arms are sore. My t-shirt drenched in sweat. My feet kick the dozen or so water bottles that clutter the floor around my drums. The fans continue to chant, even though we’ve done three encores. I’m the last to leave the stage. I don’t acknowledge the crowd the way Liam and JD do. I slip out as quietly as I can. I’m seconds behind the curtains when the lights come on. The groan of the crowd is loud and I can’t help but internally fist pump. Even without Moreno Entertainment, we still have it.
I swing open the door to the kids’ room and Quinn jumps into my arms. A piece of me will die when he’s too big to do this. Right now, I wrap my arms around my boy and hug the shit out of him because he still wants this.
“You were awesome, Dad.”
“Thanks, buddy.” I set him down, but he doesn’t leave my side. He’s tired. I can tell. It takes a while to adjust to our longer nights. I’m thankful we are doing this tour during the summer because I’m ready for him to experience school the way I did, except for the parts that I didn’t like.
Cold hands clamp around my leg. I look down to find Elle looking up at me. I smile at her, only to be rewarded with the biggest smile I’ve ever seen. Who knew after one sleepless night that we’d be friends? I crouch down so that I’m level with her. Quinn stands tall, my hand set on the back of his leg so he can more or less hold me up. I’m too exhausted to trust myself not to fall over.
“I saw you throw your sticks lots a times.”
“You did? Did you remember that I was doing it for you?”
Elle nods. “Peyton didn’t care though. She didn’t watch the show.”
“It’s okay. Maybe she’ll watch next time.” I look over at Peyton, who is standing in the corner with arms crossed over her chest. She looks up, her face stoic, when the door opens again. Noah runs up to Liam and Josie, and Elle waves at her mom. It doesn’t go unnoticed that neither girl is running to her. I can see the heartbreak roll over her face. I want to pull her into my arms and tell her that everything will be okay, but that would be crossing so many lines that I know she’s not ready for.
Instead, I do the only thing I know I have a little bit of power over. “I think your mom missed you. Maybe you should go see her,” I whisper into Elle’s ear.
Elle looks at Katelyn and says, “You think?”
I nod. “Yeah, I think so.”
Elle takes off and launches herself into Katelyn’s arms. I stand, pulling Quinn’s hand into mine and look at Katelyn, offeri
ng her my sincerest apologies. I want to help her, but I’m not sure if I can.
CHAPTER 8
Katelyn
When the band took their final encore, I felt like I could finally breathe. As the guys left the stage I wanted to clap like I was fan, but held back. I’m so proud of Liam, and seeing this side of him is amazing. He performs with such confidence, just like he did on the football field. I have no doubt he could’ve done either and been successful.
Liam and Jimmy pass me as if I’m nothing more than a common employee. I know that I am, but it still stings. I can’t forget that I’m at their beck and call, not the other way around. I wait for Harrison and I hate that my body shivers in anticipation that he’ll be close again. It shouldn’t feel like this, my body belongs to Mason. I belong to Mason. The lights go on and still no Harrison. I look out and see people moving out of their seats. I take a deep breath and step out onto stage, ready to face Harrison and encourage to him to get back stage. I look at his drum set, empty. He’s already gone and I missed him.
Why do I care that I missed him? I don’t. Or maybe I do and I can’t bring myself to admit that, when he’s in the room, the chaos doesn’t exist. That watching him hold Elle the other night not only hurt, but gave me hope that my girls will heal and if I can’t help them, someone else can and is willing to step up and do it. He didn’t have to hold her all night and sleep in an uncomfortable chair, but he did, and I couldn’t even thank him for it.
Opening the door to the kids’ room, I stand there. Noah is with Liam and Josie, gushing about what he just saw his dad do. Quinn is with Harrison, who is on bended knee and talking with Elle. Peyton, my very sweet and angry child, is in the corner standing defiantly. And no one knows I’m here, except Harrison.
There is a glint in his eye and I think he’s remembering when I touched him earlier. I didn’t mean to, at least I don’t think I did. It felt natural to put my hand on his back and wish him good luck.
He leans in and whispers something in Elle’s ear and whatever it is causes her to break into a dead sprint toward me. My arms are out before she jumps into them. I hug her tightly, but feel empty. I look over at Peyton and wave her over to me, but she ignores me. Doesn’t she know my arms feel empty without both my girls in them?
“Mommy, did you watch the concert?”
Her exuberance pleases me. I want them to enjoy this adventure and not beg to go home. I’m liking my job, aside from Liam’s outburst earlier, and don’t want to give it up, but if they aren’t happy, I will.
“I did. Did you watch it?”
“Oh yes and we could feel the music through the walls. My heart was pounding so fast.”
“Mine too.” I put her down and hold her hand in mine. We walk over to Peyton, who turns away from us.
“Hey, Peyton. Are you ready to go?”
She shrugs.
“Elle, why don’t you go get your things ready while I talk to Peyton.” I kiss her on her cheek and watch as she walks away. She has a spring in her step and wonder if she’s even coping with Mason’s death or if Peyton is right. Elle’s mine, whereas Peyton and Mason were attached at the hip.
I reach out and pull Peyton’s hand into mine, she tries to jerk away, but I don’t allow her to. I don’t want to be stern with her, but if I need to, I’ll do what I must to make her understand that she’s mine too, with or without Mason.
“Did you watch Uncle Liam on stage?”
“No.” Her response is sharp.
“Why not?”
“I don’t care.”
“That’s not true.” I bend down and try to look at Peyton, but she refuses to make eye contact with me. “Peyton, you can talk to me about everything you’re thinking.”
“No, I can’t because you’ll cry.”
She’s right, I will. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t cry for Mason.
“I’ll try not to cry, but I miss your dad just like you and Elle do. It’s hard, but things are getting better. We’re on this trip with all our friends and we’re going to go to Disney World. Uncle Liam is doing a lot to help us heal, don’t you think we should at least try?”
She shakes her head and turns so I can only see her back. Her hand comes up and swipes at her face. It breaks my heart to see her cry and not be able to do anything for her.
I look over my shoulder and offer Liam what probably looks like a grimace. When I stand, he pulls me into his arms.
“She’ll come around,” he whispers into my ear so no one else can hear him. I nod and rest my head on his shoulder. He kisses me softly on the cheek and leaves me to tend to my heart-broken child.
I run my hand through her long brown hair, twirling her curls with my fingers when I get to the ends. I love her curls. Both she and Elle have been blessed with such beautiful hair. Women pay big bucks for this look.
“Come on, sweetie.” I pick her up and hold her in my arms. I don’t know what to do, but I feel like a total failure of a mother.
Elle is ready and waiting with everyone, holding Harrison’s hand. I want to laugh at the sheer difference between the two of them. There stands a man, with his excessively tattooed arms holding hands with a petite wannabe cheerleader. Holding his other hand is his son. When you look at Quinn, you can tell that he belongs to a drummer by the way he dresses, with his red velvet jacket, the collar up and his black pants. He’s a smaller version of Harrison and already carries himself full of confidence. But my Elle, she’s opposite, prissy almost; always in a dress with her hair done just right. She’d wear make-up if I’d let her. This unlikely trio is like night and day and I’m on the outside watching as this man develops a relationship with my daughter. Sometimes it makes me want to scream and sometimes I want to be thankful that she’s okay talking to him, or anyone for that matter because I just don’t have the answers for her right now. I don’t even have the answers for Peyton, who needs me the most.
Harrison looks over his shoulder and smiles at me. For the first time I don’t hesitate and smile back. Maybe we can be friends, nothing more, though. He’s not my type and I love my husband, whether he’s here to love me back or not.
I follow everyone out and onto the bus. Peyton hasn’t moved, her hands are locked tight around my neck. If I let go, she’d hang off me like a monkey. I’m tempted to try this, but that was something Mason did with the girls. He’d let them climb all over him and never tell them to get down. It didn’t matter what he was doing, even if he was watching football, the girls acted like he was a jungle gym.
“Girls, get down. Your dad is trying to scout the game.”
“They’re fine, babe.”
“No, they aren’t. You have work to do.”
“And I’m doing it, see.” Mason holds up his pen and notepad and points to the TV where the game film is running on loop.
Peyton and Elle are climbing all over him, hanging from his arms. It doesn’t faze him, but it does me. I don’t want to see him get angry with them for bugging him while he’s working.
“I’ll take them to the store with me.”
“Why?”
“Because they are bugging you.”
Mason sets down his pad and pulls each girl off of him. He stands and comes over to me, pulling me into his arms.
“Are you jealous of your daughters?”
“What? No. Why would I be?”
Mason shrugs. “I don’t know. I have two very gorgeous brunettes showering me with attention and my very sexy wife trying to make them stop. I think you want to hang on me for a while.”
I bite my lip to stop the smirk forming and shake my head. “You’re impossible.”
Mason kisses my neck, working his way to my ear. “I love you, Mrs. Powell and I love those two girls right over there. If they are bugging me, I’ll ask for help. I’d honestly like for you to come sit in between my legs and help me work.”
I push him slightly. “You’re incorrigible.”
“You love me.”
“I do, more
than anything.”
I wish I had a camera at the time to capture those moments between Mason and the girls. I’m not sure I ever thought to take a picture when they were climbing all over him or sitting on his lap while he was scouting. So many memories that I’ve missed and I’ll never get back or be able to show the girls just how great their dad was.
I’m relishing the fact that she’s letting me hold her for so long. I don’t want to put Peyton down. I want to cuddle with her until she feels safe enough to open up. Josie’s right, the girls need to speak to someone about what they’re dealing with. Clearly, I’m not enough, and I need to be okay with that.
I sit down on the couch and immediately regret it. She’s out of my arms faster than I can ask her to stay. She goes to Noah and sits down. He doesn’t acknowledge her, but Quinn does. I can’t hear what they are talking about, but Peyton smiles and Noah rolls his eyes.
The bus roars to life and the kids all cheer. They should be sleeping, but tour life doesn’t allow for normal hours. We’ll drive for a few hours before getting to our hotel, where we’ll stay for a few days and take the kids to Disney World. This will be a first for Noah, Peyton and Elle. This was something Mason and I had talked about many times and I hate that he’s not here to share it with us.
Liam sits down next me and hands me a bottle of water. “I’m sorry for yelling at you earlier. I get a bit stressed and the flowers, they set me off.”
“It’s okay.”
“No, it’s not,” he says as he shakes his head. I watch as he downs the bottle of water in one gulp. I’ve always wondered how he and Mason could do that. I’d choke if I tried.
“It is. I just don’t want to be fired.”
Liam laughs. “I couldn’t fire you if I wanted.”
“Yeah, why’s that?”
He looks around and his eyes land on Harrison who is talking with the kids not a few feet away from us. “He’d kill me.”
I shake my head. I know Liam and Josie think he’d be a good fit for me, but I don’t. We have nothing in common.
“You need to stop.”
“Stop what?” he asks nonchalantly.
The XOXO New Adult Collection: 16 Full Length New Adult Stories Page 5