Rena squeezed me a little harder, putting her head against my chest. “Bannen, I’ve always wondered, you know, why I have magic like this. It’s incredibly difficult to be a mage with magic like mine, and honestly the only upside I ever had because of it was you. I wouldn’t trade you for anything. But I still wondered, why me? Why this?”
I closed my eyes, feeling a certain fatalistic inevitability. “You think Toh’sellor is the answer?”
“I’m not sure if it’s THE answer but I think it is AN answer, certainly. Don’t you? Otherwise it’s too much of a coincidence that after seven generations of Void Mages, I just happened to stumble across a shard of Toh’sellor when no one else has, proving that we at least have the power to destroy it. Besides, do we really have any choice? I can’t run around the world destroying the shards for the rest of my life. We have to cut this off at the source. We’ll lose the world by inches otherwise.”
I hated it. I hated her logic, her sense, the way that the pieces fit together too neatly for me to argue against them. I hated all of it. “I hate you very much right now.”
“I know,” she said and I could hear the smile in her voice. “I love you too.”
My arms hugged her back even while I wrestled with this, but the truth of the matter was, there wasn’t a thing in the world I wouldn’t do for her if she asked it of me. Rena knew this. She knew it, and she used it to her advantage when she felt like she needed to, and gods help us both because even though I knew this was an extremely bad idea, I could already feel myself caving. Anger ran through me in a hot surge for putting us both through this, and I swallowed it back, tasting bile. “You owe me for this.”
“Majorly,” she agreed without a qualm.
“And if you die on me, I’ll find a way to resurrect you. Just so I can strangle you. See if I don’t.”
She actually giggled. “Like you’ll let anything kill me.”
I wanted to shake her. Had to stop myself from doing so. “This faith of yours is alarming and I’m not sure I appreciate it. I’m not infallible, Rena, you know this, I get hurt all the time.”
“Yes, but I never get hurt,” she argued, reasonable and still without a trace of worry anywhere on her face. Blinking up at me with all the innocence of a newborn babe, she asked, “So we’re going?”
“You said purple, of course we’re going.” Clenching and unclenching my fists, I swallowed my anger down again, praying I wouldn’t choke on it. I would inevitably have lots of nightmares for the near future. I seriously did not want to go, I didn’t want her to go, but was enough of a realist to acknowledge that even if I flat refused she’d go without me. My Rena’s stubborn that way. “You are impossible, seriously, why did I agree to be with you the second time? All you do is try to give me heart failure, which I don’t deserve, I’ve been very good to you, and how do you repay that devotion? You use our code word to overturn all my objections, reasonable objections, I might add.”
She saw through my babbling as the rant it was, just to blow off steam and air how displeased I was with the situation in general. “I’m very sorry. I promise not to do it again.”
I snorted. “Excuse me while I don’t hold my breath.”
Chi took us in and was the only one that dared to ask, “Purple?”
“Long story,” Rena and I said in unison.
I let my head tip back, as I needed to focus. I could rant and scream and beat up things later, but her life depended on me thinking things through now so we didn’t go into a horrible situation half-cocked. Even though I was still very against this idea I knew exactly what needed to be done. I’d been on crazy missions like this before, I knew the logistics of what should happen.
“The only way that I’ll agree to going is if we have the right people for the job. We need another fighter at the very least, a mage that specializes in barriers, another mage that specializes in healing magic. I’d feel better with two more fighters.”
Vee and Chi exchanged glances. “Just a party of six or so?”
“For the spearhead team, yes. Any more than that, we won’t be able to move fast, and speed is your only friend when it comes to fighting Toh’sellor. That we know from experience. In order to get past all of the minions, we’ll definitely need more than that single team, of course. But each team needs to be a unit of six, to give them the mobility; otherwise they’re going to grind to a halt.”
Salvatore gave me an intense stare. “You’ve done this before.”
“Not this precisely, but yeah, I’ve got a history of fighting crazy things and being in places I probably shouldn’t be.” His surprise amused me for some reason and my mouth kicked up into an ironic smile. “What, you thought I was summoned by her because of my pretty face? You have no idea. I’m literally her only protection until she can get those complicated spells off. It’s real work keeping her safe.”
“I can see that,” Chi allowed and grinned at Rena, who still hugged me and gave no sign she was going to let go soon. “How about we try to combine talents for this group, Salvatore? People with fighting ability and magic.”
Not at all fooled, Salvatore eyeballed him. “You volunteering, Specialist?”
“Yup, ’cause we’re bosom buddies.” Chi gave us a wink but otherwise kept his face straight.
Vee sighed, the sound like a mountain shuddering. “I suppose that means I’m going as well.”
“Vee, darling,” Chi crooned, “you know that I’d be lost without you.”
Salvatore shook his head. “Why do you put up with this idiot, Vee?”
“He owes me too many favors,” Vee explained and I could tell that at some inner level she was laughing. I wasn’t in the least fooled—Vee was spoiling for a good fight.
I was frankly relieved that they had volunteered. After all, I’d seen what they could do and if there was a fight to be had, I definitely wanted them guarding our backs. “So that’s four. Director, any thoughts on the other two? Or can I request people?”
He gave me a long look. “You’ve only met a few agents, I believe.”
“And they’re some of the best people I’ve ever worked with,” I returned levelly. “If I have a choice on who to put at her back? I would like to keep Agent Yez and Agent Maksohm.”
Yez outright grinned at me, pleased. Maksohm might have been blushing a little on some level but that was a guess on my part. He had his professional agent face on which made it hard to decipher what he thought. “Director, in truth, I’d prefer to stay as their teammate as well.”
Salvatore’s eyebrows rose. “So the admiration is mutual, then? Interesting. Alright, consider yourself a permanent team until this situation is solved. I’ll start the logistics of pulling together other teams. It will take a good fortnight, I think, so I suggest you start training together and working out how you’re going to do this. Magus, I want a report of what exactly you’re doing to destroy the shards. We need that information to work off of. I can’t imagine that a shard is any different in composition from the main body.”
“You might be surprised, sir,” Rena returned, finally letting go of me. “But I’ll write you that report and get it to you tomorrow.”
“Good. For now, dismissed.”
The director had told me to write a report, but in truth I had no idea what he wanted. Or at what level to write it at. Because I was me, I thought better in schematics, so that was what I started with. I settled into an empty office that had a window overlooking the training yard, borrowed some paper and a pencil from Yez, and settled at the table. I drew up seven schematics, as every shard had been a little different, and I wanted to illustrate the differences. I found it easier to work on this problem than the other one currently in the training yard, steadily destroying the equipment. Bannen Was Not Happy. I’d never seen him this enraged, actually, and while I was aware that it was not me specifically his anger was directed at, it wasn’t comfortable being around him right now. My best bet was to give him time to cool down. In the meantime, I might as
well do the task given.
Pausing, I looked at the blank walls, frowning. Seriously, how do I write this?
A rap at the door alerted me and Maksohm stepped through. “Rena.”
“Hi, Maksohm, good timing. How should I write this?” I gestured toward the paper. “Director Salvatore isn’t a mage, so I’m not sure how much magical theory I can put into the report.”
“Write the technical version, then write a layman’s summary that’s about a page long just for the director,” Maksohm advised. “That’s what we all do.”
So more or less what I’d had to do in my student days for the Council? “Alright. I can do that.”
Maksohm took the only other available chair in the room, moving it so that he could sit sideways behind the desk, facing me. He took a second, clearly framing how he wanted to phrase the words, before he spoke. “You’re aware that Bannen is currently destroying our training yard?”
A sharp crack of wood breaking echoed from the window. I winced. “Yes. I am.”
“He’s not at a level where he’s a danger to himself or others but he is definitely toeing that line. Rena, I have to ask, is your familiar bond out of control right now?”
I put a hand over my heart, where the bond thrummed and twisted and generally made unhappy noises. It felt rather like someone had taken one of those electric eels and shoved it into my chest, where it then proceeded to throw a hissy fit. The word ‘uncomfortable’ didn’t begin to do the sensation justice. “Borderline.” I tried for a smile, failed, and decided I might as well be honest with him. “Even in the infant stages of our bond, Bannen has never lost control. He takes out his rage and frustration on poor, helpless training equipment.”
“I’m not actually worried about the damages,” Maksohm assured me dryly. “There’s nothing in that training yard that is more than a week old. Our agents are just as destructive. It’s just that I know Bannen as a relatively calm, polite young man with extraordinary control over himself.”
“And it scares you seeing him like this,” I finished that unsaid conclusion out loud. “It’s my fault, really. He’s angry with my decision but knows that logically, we can’t make any other choice. The stress of it is getting to him. Right now, he’s trying to work all of that anger out before he says or does something unforgiveable.”
Maksohm couldn’t quite suppress a flinch when another resounding crack echoed in the room. “How long is that going to take?”
“I have no idea, I’ve never seen him this angry before.” For good reason. I’d never pushed him this far before. “But don’t intervene. Don’t even try until he’s stopped.”
“Are the two of you alright?” he asked gently.
I blinked at him and realized that this, this was what he really worried about. That my insistence to go and Bannen’s rage at the decision meant our relationship was damaged. Dah’lil Maksohm was a kind soul. I smiled at him and nodded. “We’re alright. Well, actually, I’ll be paying for this for years to come, and he’ll likely bring it up every time I want to do something remotely dangerous. I’ll also owe him major favors for dragging him into this fight. But don’t worry, Maksohm, this won’t break us. As strange as it sounds, we’ve been through worse.”
He gave me this disbelieving look as if doubting that anything could be worse than this.
“Bannen mentioned to me that he told you about our first bond separation?” I made it a question even though I knew the answer. “Did he tell you that he’d broken his arm twice before we were forced to break the bond, protecting me? Even though we’d barely had three weeks together?”
“No,” Maksohm responded incredulously, “No, he didn’t tell me that.”
“I honestly wasn’t sure what to do when the bond broke,” I recalled, remembering that dark day with unease. Even the memory gave me nightmares sometimes. “He’d been so sweet to me, so supportive from the first day, even though I was so much trouble to him. And being injured so often to protect me was not a good sign. As incredible as his fighting skills are, I’m still hard to protect, and the cost to him sometimes is high. I’d half-resigned myself to the idea that I needed to let him go. It was Bannen that turned to me, demanded that I be selfish, that I hold onto him. He upended his entire world for me. I’ve never forgotten that sacrifice. I won’t ever think lightly of it. I’ll walk into danger if I need to, Maksohm, but I won’t do it casually. His life is forfeit if I do. He knows that, he knows how I feel about him being hurt, how precious he is to me. He’s not angry with me, not really. He’s angry that there’s no other choice to be had.”
“As long as it’s the situation that he’s mad about and not you.” Maksohm sat back a little, angling his head to see out the window. “Chi’s joined him.”
I turned my head to look as well. “And Yez. Oh good. Maybe they can temper him a little before he strains something.”
Maksohm made a noncommittal noise. “Assuming he doesn’t break them first. He’s really not holding back.”
“They’re tough MISD agents, they can take him.” Despite my confident words, I did feel a little worried. Chi’s decent at hand-to-hand combat but it’s not his specialty. I didn’t want anyone hurt accidentally even if this building is half-full of Healers.
“Huh.” Maksohm sounded impressed and he leaned forward, getting a better look out the window. “I didn’t think anyone could really take Yez on toe-to-toe like that. Was Bannen holding back at the shard?”
“He has to,” I responded a little sadly. “He can’t really go all out and protect me at the same time.”
Maksohm gave me an unreadable look. Perhaps surprised at my answer, although I couldn’t imagine why. Bannen was from a warrior culture, was strong enough that my magic summoned him twice to be my familiar; why would anyone think his skills were remotely subpar? I turned to watch the fight in the yard for a moment. It did look bloodthirsty and ferocious, like three wolves going for each other’s throats. Bannen showed no signs of slowing down. I imagined they’d be out there for a few more hours yet.
Turning, I went back to the report I should be writing, keeping an ear trained behind me. If something went truly wrong, I’d hear it.
The sounds of fighting acted as a counterpoint to the sounds of my pen scratching along the paper. Maksohm stayed for a while to watch before leaving. I focused on my report, writing out the technical part of it first, figuring it would be easier to summarize from it than the reverse.
When my stomach started growling, I pushed away from the desk and looked out. The three were still in the training yard but no longer actively beating each other up. Bannen lay flat on his back on a bench, forearm covering his eyes, still breathing a little hard. Yez and Chi sat propped up on either side of the bench, also breathing a little too hard. They must have just stopped. No one looked injured and I felt glad. I could breathe easy now. For a while, I honestly didn’t know if they’d accidentally hurt each other or not.
I dared to think Bannen might be calm enough to eat so I went down the stairs and out into the training yard, walking to them in a deliberately non-hurried way. “You three done?”
“‘Stick a fork in me’ done,” Chi agreed tiredly. “Rena, did you know he could fight like this?”
“Yes, of course I did,” I answered in amusement.
“And you didn’t warn me?” he demanded, mock-outraged. “Some friend you are.”
Bannen snorted a laugh but didn’t move. The fact he could laugh at all indicated a good sign. I didn’t for one second believe that he was magically over his anger, but he’d worked through the bulk of it. “Maksohm was afraid you’d accidentally kill each other earlier.”
“We know,” Yez responded dryly. “He came down and shouted out threats if we injured each other.”
He had? Huh, I hadn’t heard that. But then, my powers of concentration make me deaf and blind to my surroundings sometimes. “Well, since you were all so obedient, should I treat you to lunch?”
“I never turn down free
food,” Chi declared. “But you want us to wash up first.”
“I really do,” I agreed, trying not to laugh. “I can smell you from here. I’ll hunt up Vee and Maksohm, see if they want to join us. Meet you at the front gates.”
That got them moving, rolling up smoothly to their feet as if their muscles weren’t trembling from the very intense sparring session. As Bannen walked past me, he grabbed me by the neck and pressed a brief kiss to my forehead. He was there and gone in a second, but I felt every ounce of tension and uncertainty in me melt away at that chaste kiss. Despite what I had said earlier to Maksohm, I harbored the insecurity that Bannen was truly angry when I made a call to go into a dangerous situation. After all, it was not just my safety that I risked, it was his as well. It couldn’t be easy to stay rational, to not let emotions get the better of him, when I made decisions like this. I was insanely lucky that he never holds a grudge. Deities knew that I’d given him enough ammunition over the years.
Feeling better, I turned and went hunting for Vee, found her in the Magic Armory, and passed along the invitation for lunch. She took a rain check, as she would be in there for hours yet, but told me where to find Maksohm. I caught him exiting the library and he immediately took me up on the invitation, matching his pace with mine as we headed for the front gate.
“Did they kill each other?” he asked me bluntly.
“They didn’t even maim each other a little,” I assured him, relief making me smile. “And Bannen’s worked through the worst of the anger, so it’s a win-win all around. They’re cleaning up before meeting us.”
“I’m relieved to hear it, on all accounts.” Maksohm studied me from the corner of his eye. “You’re sure he’s alright.”
I knew what he really wanted to know. “Bannen is a very tactile creature. He has his own nonverbal ways of letting me know how he feels. Believe me, we’re fine.” Kisses on the forehead always meant we were good. I found his worry about this a little strange, and decided it was time to say so. “Why are you…anxious? About this.”
The Void Mage (The Familiar and Mage Book 2) Page 17